Episode 980 - Kyle Dunnigan
Marc:Lock the gates!
Marc:All right, let's do this.
Marc:How are you?
Marc:What the fuckers?
Marc:What the fuck buddies?
Marc:What the fucking ears?
Marc:What the fucksters?
Marc:What's happening?
Marc:I'm Mark Maron.
Marc:This is my podcast.
Marc:I'm going remote.
Marc:I'm remote right now.
Marc:I'm not in a bunker.
Marc:I'm not off the grid.
Marc:I'm in my hometown for the holidays.
Marc:Albuquerque, New Mexico.
Marc:Today on the show, Kyle Dunnigan.
Marc:Very funny.
Marc:I enjoy talking to him.
Marc:I like watching him.
Marc:He's a funny guy.
Marc:Funny comedian.
Marc:Oddball.
Marc:He's on the show.
Marc:We recorded it a little while ago back in the garage.
Marc:But how are you guys doing?
Marc:How's the holidays?
Marc:I'm actually, to be honest with you,
Marc:I feel okay.
Marc:What did I get?
Marc:Is it important what we get?
Marc:Are we talking about material things?
Marc:All I know is right now I'm sitting in a room about a block away from where I grew up at the Los Poblanos Historic Inn and Lavender Farm.
Marc:I tell you, I'm about done with lavender.
Marc:You stay at this place, there's lavender in everything.
Marc:There's lavender in the tea, in the shampoo, in the conditioner, in the soap.
Marc:Everywhere there's lavender, and it's starting to turn on me.
Marc:But that's not a criticism.
Marc:I'm just saying that certain things you can hit a limit with.
Marc:Lavender and I think crack cocaine are good examples.
Marc:For some reason, patchouli I've been wearing most of my life.
Marc:I don't even notice it anymore.
Marc:But then again, like if I wore lavender, I would probably get more reaction.
Marc:People would think I'm weird.
Marc:And if I smoke crack, I would have no friends.
Marc:I don't know if there's a real connection, but that's a connection.
Marc:Outside of that, it's been lovely.
Marc:And right now, I'm looking out, snow is falling down.
Marc:And in Los Angeles, you don't see much of this, much snow.
Marc:It's really, I'm very happy.
Marc:I'm happy that it's snowing.
Marc:I'm happy that this is a couple days after the Christmas holiday.
Marc:I'm happy...
Marc:For a lot of things.
Marc:A lot of things are scary and a lot of things are awful in the world, culturally, politically.
Marc:But it's snowing in New Mexico today and I'm glad I brought my boots.
Marc:It's the little things, folks.
Marc:It's the little things.
Marc:The boots.
Marc:Very exciting.
Marc:And I have not gotten a cold yet.
Marc:Sarah the painter had a little cold.
Marc:I did not get it.
Marc:I don't know why I didn't get it.
Marc:I'm not complaining.
Marc:I'm not going to think too deeply about it.
Marc:Because sometimes when you think like, what did I do to not get a cold?
Marc:Something in your cellular makeup says, you want one?
Marc:We can set it up.
Marc:I mean, you can kind of feel it's happening.
Marc:You know, you feel that nag, like, am I going to beat it?
Marc:Am I not going to beat it?
Marc:Am I on the cusp?
Marc:Sometimes you're on the cusp for a couple weeks.
Marc:I think I'm still on the cusp, but maybe I should just stay in the proactive thinking.
Marc:Like, you know, like I'm on top of this.
Marc:I'm fighting it on a cellular level.
Marc:I have that control.
Marc:I can tap right in to my lizard brain, go past the other stuff, maybe get a little cortisol going, a little adrenaline going, get the cells excited.
Marc:And yeah, that's what I'm doing.
Marc:That's what I'd like to think.
Marc:I'm willing my way.
Marc:through my connection with a very ancient part of my brain into not having a cold.
Marc:And once I master that, I am never going to die.
Marc:See?
Marc:See how that goes?
Marc:See how you can just keep going with that and then you realize like, ah, I'm fucking lying to myself.
Marc:So I was here in New Mexico for two days.
Marc:I saw my father, who turned 80, sat with him at a large party, his wife's family's house.
Marc:A lot of Christmas stuff going on.
Marc:There was like a bunch of kids, a bunch of grownups, several generations of people doing a present thing.
Marc:And there was my dad sitting alone by himself off to the deep in another room, just sitting there.
Marc:Just sitting there being my dad, looking him over there.
Marc:Just what's he doing?
Marc:Thinking?
Marc:What's he up to?
Marc:Why isn't he engaging?
Marc:So I was there to see him.
Marc:So I naturally went over and sat with him for a while.
Marc:But I don't know.
Marc:He's 80.
Marc:And I think, you know, he's withdrawing a bit deeper into the mind.
Marc:I wouldn't say that he's becoming Zen-like or Buddha-like unless sort of a nirvana or complete mindfulness involves some compulsive self-judgment, self-loathing, and shoulda, woulda, coulda-ness.
Marc:But he has mellowed.
Marc:He's okay.
Marc:He's older.
Marc:And it was nice seeing him.
Marc:I hope that you people were able to spend time with your families and tolerate it.
Marc:This was a little more than that.
Marc:I think as I get older and things start to fade a bit, it's nice to see him.
Marc:But it was also, honestly, nice to leave.
Marc:And we had just enough time.
Marc:And he seems to feel the same way, not in a hostile way.
Marc:But when I'm like, I'm going to go, is that all right?
Marc:I'm probably not going to see you again this trip.
Marc:He's like, yeah, yep, good, great.
Marc:I'm like, great, perfect.
Marc:So did I say what I got for Christmas?
Marc:I got a cashmere sweater.
Marc:I got a hat.
Marc:I got, what else did I get?
Marc:Oh, Sarah, the painter, finally gave me a painting.
Marc:It only took four years.
Marc:It's a nice painting.
Marc:I'm going to put that up in the house.
Marc:What else did I get?
Marc:I got a lot of cards.
Marc:Not as many as usual, but maybe it's an addressing or maybe it's because I don't send people anything.
Marc:And maybe it's because I don't really give too many presents, you know, and I don't go to parties often.
Marc:So if you're sitting there wondering why you're not popular or why you don't get Christmas cards or why you don't get gifts, do you give them?
Marc:I find that reciprocity usually leads to that sort of circle of socialization and
Marc:If you just sit there and you go through your cards and you wonder, why didn't I not get as many?
Marc:Why not as many presents?
Marc:How come no one's wishing me a happy Christmas or a merry Hanukkah?
Marc:How come that's not happening?
Marc:Well, did you do it?
Marc:Oh, yeah.
Marc:It's not all about me.
Marc:I've got to care about other people and do the polite thing.
Marc:If you're not doing that, you're probably going to be in...
Marc:In Christmas card Siberia, all alone with just one or two from your family.
Marc:I don't really know how long to hold on to the pictures of my friends' families.
Marc:You know, if you don't have a mantle or you're not pinning them up and they're just kind of hanging around, it's nice to see everybody growing every year.
Marc:But how long do you keep those pictures?
Marc:And then I feel bad if I throw them away and I end up keeping them for a long time.
Marc:Then I find them a few years later.
Marc:And then it's sort of like, oh, remember when they were like that?
Marc:Why didn't I throw that away?
Marc:It's hard to throw away pictures of people that you know and their kids all dressed up posing for photographs.
Marc:But you can do it.
Marc:When's the right time to do that?
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:Do I have an email to read?
Marc:Maybe I do.
Marc:Subject line, intergenerational Marin.
Marc:Hey, Mark, I've been a longtime fan, and although you don't know me or anything about me after listening to your podcast for so long, I feel as though I know you like a friend.
Marc:You have a way of breaking the barrier between presenter and listener.
Marc:I've been able to relate to so many of your experiences of addiction, loss, and jealousy, and that way you share them so openly and honestly.
Marc:I'm going through a divorce myself, my first.
Marc:You are much more experienced in this area than me.
Marc:Not proud of that.
Marc:That's not...
Marc:It's not a notch on my belt.
Marc:And listening to your podcast eases some of those lonely days and nights.
Marc:I wanted to share a moment with you.
Marc:The other day, my seven-year-old son came home and said, hey, dad, you know that podcast you always listen to, WTF?
Marc:He pronounces it as a word, WTF.
Marc:That Mark guy reads a turkey story for kids.
Marc:Are you sure it was him, I said?
Marc:He said, yeah, the guy with the mustache and the glasses.
Marc:We looked it up, and sure enough, there you were reading Turkey Trouble.
Marc:My parents have said that they enjoy watching you on GLOW and think you are one of the best characters of this show.
Marc:So you're transcending generations and becoming known to all.
Marc:Hope you're coming to do more shows in Australia soon.
Marc:Happy holidays, Glenn.
Marc:That's exciting.
Marc:Everybody knows me for a different reason.
Marc:That's nice.
Marc:And then it's almost like the other things that I do that they don't know is kind of like my secret life for those people who know about that and not about the other thing.
Marc:Anyway, folks, I have to hit the road.
Marc:We've got to pack up.
Marc:It's amazing that we travel with so much stuff.
Marc:It just keeps growing.
Marc:All this stuff is growing as we move, and we've only been here three days, and it's almost like we live in this room.
Marc:That's how we travel.
Marc:So, folks, stay safe.
Marc:And right now, uh-oh, hold on.
Marc:Someone's at the door.
Marc:You'll get it?
Marc:It's a maintenance guy?
Marc:Oh, they're coming to check the hot water as we leave?
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Oh, okay.
Marc:Tankless water heater in the ceiling.
Marc:Thank you.
Marc:All right.
Marc:How you doing, buddy?
Marc:So that was a little real life moment.
Marc:We didn't have hot water for the last couple hours.
Marc:So the guy came in with a ladder and he's going to go up into the ceiling now and we're about to leave.
Marc:But now I feel like maybe we should stay just to take another shower.
Marc:Okay, so now I'm going to share with you my conversation with Kyle Dunnigan.
Marc:You can follow him on Twitter, Instagram, and YouTube, and he's very active on all three, particularly Instagram, where he does a lot of funny stuff.
Marc:So this is me and Kyle Dunnigan.
Marc:It was a very fun conversation.
Marc:Enjoy it.
Guest:Are you all right, buddy?
Guest:You tired?
Guest:No, I just kind of meditated, though, so I'll pump up.
Guest:What do you mean you kind of meditated?
Marc:When you drove over?
Guest:Well, I got here early.
Guest:I don't like to be late.
Guest:Oh, yeah, I don't either.
Guest:It makes me panicked, so I have a meditation app that I put on.
Guest:Headspace?
Guest:No, it's called Insight.
Guest:Oh, geez.
Guest:What's the difference?
Guest:Did you try Headspace?
Guest:I did Headspace, which I like, but I don't like when you watch cartoons and stuff like that.
Guest:What?
Marc:Oh, I actually, see, I didn't even get that far.
Marc:I put the app on my phone, and I guess I didn't open it.
Marc:I made the move to meditate, but didn't take the action.
Marc:You don't meditate at all?
Guest:No.
Guest:Yeah.
Why?
Guest:Are we recording now?
Guest:Sure.
Guest:Is this the show?
Guest:Kinda.
Guest:Have you listened to it before?
Guest:I have.
Guest:What year did you start?
Guest:I'm older than you, right?
Guest:You're, what are you, 40?
Guest:47.
Marc:Oh, you're getting up there.
Guest:Thank you.
Guest:I had a midlife crisis, by the way, this time last year.
Guest:It's about the time.
Guest:Full on midlife, which I think is good to have midlife crisis.
Marc:Yeah, I don't know that, I think I panicked right through mine.
Guest:So you're in the winter of your life.
Marc:Yeah, it might be the final quarter.
Marc:This might be it.
Marc:It might be the, you know.
Marc:It makes you feel alive.
Marc:Like, I feel alive now.
Marc:Yeah, well, it's going to keep getting more.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But it becomes a sad thing, that feeling of being alive when you know time's running out.
Marc:You're like, ugh.
Marc:I don't think about it.
Marc:I don't think about it.
Marc:I do think about it.
Marc:I think we should think about it.
Marc:Well, I mean, I know what's happening.
Marc:But it's sort of, we all know we're gonna die, but we don't know of what.
Marc:And when you get older and things start to ache and creak a little bit, you're like, this body's only built for so much.
Guest:That's the thing, you can't ignore it when you start losing your vision and the aches and stuff.
Guest:But other cultures that face death, unlike us, they are less stressed out.
Guest:We push it away, but it's there, but then we got.
Marc:Well, I think Canadians are better at it because they know like, well, I've got health care and there's probably some sort of elderly care.
Marc:There's not the crisis of like, what the fuck are we going to do when you get sick or no one wants to deal with you anymore?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Well, they got a state thing that you just go check in and that's that.
Marc:Why doesn't it work?
Marc:Why do you think it doesn't work here?
Marc:Because there's no money in it.
Marc:Is that it?
Marc:Of course.
Marc:What do you mean?
Marc:Why is it not national health care?
Marc:Because you'd have to basically shut down the insurance market and move it to the government.
Guest:Is it that simple?
Guest:Is there anything else?
Guest:Or is it just that, you think?
Guest:It's just that.
Guest:I can't figure out.
Guest:Was Obama sitting in this chair that I'm in?
Guest:He was in that chair, but in a different garage.
Guest:Oh.
Marc:What do you mean?
Marc:But this chair.
Marc:That chair, yeah.
Guest:No, that was the chair, for sure.
Guest:Well, I need a minute to take that in.
Guest:Okay.
Okay.
Marc:Am I just sad here?
Marc:And now here I am.
Marc:What's going on with you?
Marc:I need a minute.
Marc:It's been like 20 seconds.
Guest:All right, I'm good.
Guest:It's pretty cool though.
Guest:I thought I needed a minute, but it was actually 34 seconds.
Marc:So wait, how did the midwife crisis manifest itself?
Guest:I was writing for a show, Sarah Silverman's show on Hulu.
Guest:When you were dating or after?
Guest:After.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Why was that tone?
Marc:What was that tone?
Marc:After.
Marc:What kind of tone?
Marc:What would you say that tone was?
Guest:It was like after.
Guest:Why'd you bring that up?
Guest:No.
Guest:That tone was just to put a point on it.
Marc:I think you might have been the last comic.
Guest:I think you might have-
Guest:Yeah, I did it.
Guest:I tend to do that.
Guest:I tend to do the last comic.
Guest:Well, I'll tell you this.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:You get along with her, though.
Guest:I do.
Marc:She's actually really good at being friends with all her exes, I think.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I feel like also I realize working for her is our relationship.
Guest:She must have been the boss because there was no transition feeling.
Guest:And I was writing for Amy Schumer before that, and I got kind of in that writer loop.
Guest:And then I realized how little time I had.
Guest:I just suddenly felt my age.
Guest:And I wanted to be a performer.
Guest:That was always a thing.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I like to write.
Guest:It's a great job.
Guest:You've done a lot of it, it seems.
Guest:Yeah, but I got caught in it because of the stability of money and all that stuff.
Guest:Sure, sure.
Guest:Responsibility.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I'm going to focus on my Instagram.
Guest:I just make Instagram videos.
Guest:I'm going to do that for a year.
Marc:This was the midlife crisis?
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:So that doesn't sound very dark.
Guest:It didn't get that dark, but I tell you, I'm still feeling it.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I get up at 6.30 every morning.
Marc:On purpose or just because you can't sleep anymore.
Marc:On purpose.
Marc:No, I mean I get up at like six and I can't go back to sleep.
Marc:You just pop awake?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Are you awake at night too?
Marc:That's one of the gifts of being older is that you just can't sleep in the morning anymore.
Marc:No, I usually fall asleep at night like boom.
Marc:How many hours are you getting getting up at 6.30?
Marc:I think I probably average six.
Marc:That's okay.
Marc:You know, it's not great, but it's just where I'm at.
Marc:Whatever's good for you.
Marc:It's not good for me.
Marc:I mean, I'd like to be able to, like, on a weekend, maybe sleep till nine.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But, like, I don't know.
Marc:I think I'm doing a bit about it that, like, I don't really believe in God, but that's the one thing that makes me question because it does seem like as you get older, and it happens to everybody, that you can't sleep as much.
Marc:It's almost like God saying, like, hey, you might want to be up for this.
Yeah.
Marc:Not a lot of time left.
Marc:Not much.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:You're not religious.
Marc:No.
Marc:You say that like you were wary, like what if I said I am, but I'm open to your views.
Guest:I would get nervous if I said you were very religious.
Marc:I'm open to your views.
Marc:Tell me lost one.
Marc:How do you explain your inability to suspend your disbelief?
Guest:You feel like such an idiot when someone's religious and they're looking at you thinking you go to hell.
Guest:I sat next to a lady on the plane.
Guest:How did this come up?
Guest:She had pamphlets.
Guest:She was one of those people.
Guest:And she was...
Guest:Listen, and you try to be nice.
Guest:You want to hurt someone's feelings.
Guest:No.
Guest:But then she said that I was wasting my life being a comedian.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And then I sort of turned, and I thought, why am I going to defend myself?
Guest:Why would you say that?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And so I was like, well, how can you say people in Africa who never hear of Jesus go to hell?
Guest:Right.
Guest:And she said, there's the internet now.
Marc:Oh, it's only a matter of time before we get to them.
Marc:Right.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:The missionary mindset.
Marc:Like, if they're not going to hell, we can still get there.
Marc:We've got people down there.
Marc:They're handing out the pamphlets.
Marc:We're working on the internet.
Marc:We're getting close, yeah.
Guest:And then people that just, if they're in a plane crash and they're the only survivor, they thank God for saving them.
Guest:But then they're saying, like, he chose me over the other people he let die.
Guest:Like, it doesn't make sense that there's any God watching and...
Guest:No, if there is, he's got a very wicked sense of humor.
Marc:He's hilarious.
Marc:Like, while we've been talking, eight children died.
Marc:Well, yeah, well, I mean, probably more, but I don't even frame it that way.
Marc:The weird thing that, you know, it's prophesied that the world will end, and, you know, we're all sort of, like, if it does sort of come to pass that it does, and it does seem biblical, a lot of us are going to feel pretty stupid.
Marc:Oh, yeah.
Marc:But also, I would have a lot of questions.
Marc:Well, I mean, you probably won't get an opportunity to ask them unless you jump on board now.
Marc:You can't do that Hail Mary pass when you see Jesus lowering out of the sky.
Guest:I think you can, as long as you say you believe in Jesus.
Guest:You get in under the... You get in under the... That's what people on death row do.
Guest:They get in.
Marc:Right, right.
Guest:Now accept, and then they go to heaven.
Marc:Yeah, or at least they feel better in that last few seconds.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:A little bit of optimism.
Guest:If you were on death row, I think I would start to maybe get religious.
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:I don't see my brain doing it.
Marc:It's really a matter of being able to suspend the disbelief, which I don't sit around and be atheistic all the time.
Marc:I do find it disconcerting when people of faith act within that faith or they think they are, and it's clearly damaging to others and to the world in general what they are able to rationalize.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:but I don't begrudge them their faith.
Marc:I just don't know that I can get there.
Marc:And fortunately, as you get older, less things seem to matter.
Marc:So you do get a little relief anyways.
Marc:I do feel relieved now that I'm older.
Marc:Well, yeah, because a lot of the things that were so important and so horrifying and so painful that you look back at them and you're like, I was 12.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I was 19.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And I thought that, you know.
Marc:Where'd you grow up?
Marc:Whose show is this?
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:I grew up in New Mexico.
Marc:I think it's mine.
Marc:You did?
Marc:Mostly, yeah.
Marc:I was born in Jersey and lived two years in Alaska.
Marc:My dad was in the service and then from third grade through high school, Albuquerque.
Marc:See, I met you in New York and you seem like such a New Yorker to me.
Marc:Well, no, I always had a line in because my family was from Jersey so I was there all the time and New York was important to me.
Marc:But I ended up there and like...
Marc:89.
Marc:You were one of the big guys when I was in New York.
Guest:I was never a big guy in New York.
Guest:I know you think that you weren't, but you were.
Marc:In the alt scene, maybe.
Marc:But in terms of actual club work, when did you start?
Marc:Let me see.
Marc:97.
Marc:Oh, well, yeah, I was.
Marc:Big time?
Guest:well i mean i could work at the cellar by then yeah yeah but you know yeah that's when he started that's when little kyle dunnigan showed up with his guitar yeah i was very uh pushed away from what i do naturally because i do love music i do impressions and these things were not looked upon as a good idea because back then to get a deal you talk about yourself yeah your problems and
Marc:No, that's not, okay, right, I get it.
Guest:Managers were like, put the guitar down.
Guest:What's your point of view?
Guest:Yes, all that.
Guest:And really, I'm more like a Dana Carvey kind of guy.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And imagine Dana Carvey trying to do that stuff.
Marc:No, I know.
Guest:It doesn't quite fit.
Marc:Well, I mean, I guess New York is not the, it's weird.
Marc:You should have went to San Francisco.
Guest:It would have changed everything for you.
Guest:Yeah, I'm just now doing what I should be doing, I feel like.
Guest:Yeah, finally.
Guest:Finally.
Guest:Well, I'm only 47, so.
Marc:But it's weird where you choose to start, because like I,
Marc:you know after new york like i hit the wall in new york yeah and eventually i was like fuck it and i went to san francisco and they'll they just love people who don't fit in oh you fucked up we need to go back in time you'd be on snl now if you just gone to san francisco yeah does that hurt your feelings a little bit i had an audition there that was so bad let's go back to the beginning yes
Guest:dig you seem like uh i can't you seem you seem like you might be adverse to that no go ahead no do you go to therapy uh not right now but you have i have yeah because of women problems mostly yeah my father was sick and dying and uh that brought me into it and and then i had like yeah your dad when was that uh 98 holy fuck it's been a long time
Guest:Yeah, 20 years.
Guest:How old was he?
Guest:He was like 59 when he got diagnosed.
Marc:Holy shit.
Guest:With what?
Guest:Brain tumor.
Guest:What McCain had.
Guest:Really the same thing?
Guest:Yeah, it's aggressive and bad.
Guest:That's terrible.
Guest:I'm sorry.
Guest:It was a comedy podcast, right?
Marc:No.
Guest:Oh, okay.
Guest:Not necessarily.
Guest:Have you listened?
Marc:Never.
Guest:No, I have actually.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I don't listen to podcasts.
Guest:I listen to you, Joe Rogan.
Guest:I don't know why.
Marc:There goes your week.
Marc:Between me and Joe Rogan, that's what, 90 hours?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:He does like, what does he do, six hours?
Guest:Yeah, we did.
Guest:I did at one point say like, is it over soon?
Guest:But I love that.
Marc:I mean, he... It's like the old days.
Marc:It's like doing a three-hour radio show.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:You just kind of hang out.
Marc:Someone else comes by and you just hang out and they talk to him.
Marc:It's low pressure.
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:I'm starting a podcast and I'm thinking of doing like 40 minutes because... What happened to Professor Blastoff?
Guest:Oh, that ended maybe like five years ago.
Marc:Really?
Marc:It's been that long?
Guest:Were you a listener?
Yeah.
Marc:Yeah, I listened to most of the one I was on.
Marc:Oh, that's right.
Marc:I forgot you were on it.
Marc:See how we forget?
Marc:You barely even did the fucking show.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:But I think Teague was gone.
Marc:It was me and you and Huntsberger and I don't remember who else.
Marc:Yeah, that was it.
Marc:Just the three of us?
Marc:I don't think Teague was there, was she?
Marc:She must have been.
Marc:Oh, maybe she was, yeah.
Marc:You never did it without her?
Guest:No.
Marc:I just remember we were talking about farting in relationships.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:It was a deep podcast.
Guest:Oh, I remember that.
Guest:Because I had a situation where... Yeah.
Guest:You know Mike Burton?
Guest:Comedian?
Guest:No.
Guest:He used to fart on me and my friend Justin.
Guest:We lived in the same building.
Guest:We'd take a nap.
Guest:That's how hard we were working.
Guest:He would fart on us.
Guest:It was the same kind of guy that would write on your face if you were drunk.
Guest:Exactly.
Guest:So we got into this Vietnam kind of sleep where... So I was dating this girl and maybe a month in and she farted.
Guest:yeah like 1am and i screamed i threw the covers up i was like and then i realized where i was yeah and jumped back down to like a fetal position and she mustn't knew she farted because she didn't say you know why'd you scream yeah she farted in her sleep yeah which look what's natural it's just something you got to suck up
Marc:You know what I mean?
Guest:Well, there's a point in every relationship where you just gotta deal with that.
Marc:Yeah, but it's rare to find a woman that just blows them like dudes do.
Marc:Like, here we are.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And then just on the couch, just farting at each other.
Marc:Have you had that kind of love?
Guest:No.
Marc:Yeah, I mean, you know they do it, and they smell, and they have their things, but they always carry a little shame, I think.
Marc:And I'm generalizing, but I think most men, after a certain point, it's like, it's coming out, and it's gonna be in the car, it's gonna be during a walk.
Guest:Do you have a talk, or you just surprise, like, during a walk?
Marc:After a certain point?
Marc:No, no, just go.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:You got to get to that point where you just go.
Marc:Are you dating now?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:This is my podcast.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I've been with this woman, Sarah, for like four years.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:How far in was it like we fart?
Marc:No, I do.
Marc:I mean, she's not on board.
Marc:She still keeps it down though.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I mean, I know she does it somewhere, you know, but we, you know.
Marc:You've never heard her fart in four years.
Marc:No.
Marc:Wow.
Marc:No.
Marc:She's good.
Marc:I feel bad.
Marc:I mean, I'm not saying like, God damn it, don't you ever.
Guest:No, you're not forcing her to.
Guest:No.
Guest:I'm not saying that.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:She's just making an effort.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:This is like our morning radio style warmup for real conversation.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:You edit these down, right?
Yeah.
Marc:I'm just trying to get you comfortable.
Marc:I know you're used to doing a lot of radio and Corolla show and you're doing voices and stuff.
Marc:I just want to do whatever needs.
Marc:I need time to get into a warm up.
Guest:So if we could just take that, I'd appreciate it.
Guest:Sure.
Guest:Throw out any names.
Guest:I'll do a voice.
Marc:But where did you grow up?
Guest:I grew up in Connecticut.
Guest:Which part?
Guest:Weston.
Guest:It's near Westport.
Guest:So that's fancy.
Guest:It was, but we were one of the poor kids compared to the other kids.
Guest:Really?
Guest:I didn't know that we were pretty wealthy until I got out of town.
Guest:My friends had...
Guest:mansions and this one guy had a pool with an island in the middle.
Guest:Oh, wow.
Guest:That Olivia de Havilland got married on.
Guest:And we had none of that.
Guest:We had a small plane.
Guest:It was like one engine.
Marc:You had a small plane?
Guest:Yeah, it was like a tiny one though.
Guest:But you had a plane.
Marc:Yeah, but we had no pool.
Marc:But your dad had a plane?
Guest:Yeah, but we had like, the house was like only four bedrooms.
Guest:Uh-huh, wow, sounds rough.
Marc:No pool?
Marc:No pool.
Marc:But did you park the plane in the back?
Marc:No.
Marc:Was the plane up on bricks?
Marc:Like was it up on a lift on a jack?
Guest:Yeah, next to the boat.
Marc:It never gets used in pieces?
Guest:I would never.
Guest:Do you have a boat?
Guest:No.
Guest:No boat?
Guest:No.
Guest:Who flew?
Guest:My father flew.
Guest:How many kids in the family?
Guest:Three of us.
Guest:I'm the youngest.
Guest:How are the other ones doing?
Guest:Brother's a cop.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Middle brother.
Guest:In Connecticut?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:And he's so stressed out.
Guest:I have to say.
Guest:I don't know, man.
Guest:It never ends for cops.
Guest:I mean, think about that job.
Guest:I know there's a lot about it.
Marc:The thing about the job of cop is that you know that what you do is never going to be resolved.
Marc:There's always going to be crime.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So there's no point in your life at your job where you're like, yeah, I think we got a handle on this.
Guest:I did it.
Guest:Yeah, it's good.
Guest:yeah you go to where people are being assholes that's your job you know 25 years they've been like hey you know go here what city uh uh heart near hartford it's called um windsor oh okay i know windsor yeah i was in hartford so like he's got domestic abuse calls yeah there's some gang stuff too yeah so it's high crime there so he's out in there putting his hand on his gun as he approaches cars
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:That's dangerous.
Guest:I mean- It's the most dangerous, really.
Guest:My friend, we were shooting this thing, and this is in LA, but he was dressed as a cop.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Fake gun.
Guest:Cops pulled us over, and they were like, is that a real gun?
Guest:And he goes, no, this is a toy, and he touched it, and there was a gun in his face.
Guest:Like, you-
Guest:Cops stopped.
Guest:You just put your hands in the air.
Guest:There's a lawsuit.
Guest:Sue them later.
Guest:But just don't put your hands in your pockets.
Guest:It happened pretty quick, huh?
Guest:It was unbelievable.
Guest:And he was a cop, this guy, Justin McKinney.
Guest:He's a comedian now.
Marc:I know Justin.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:How's he doing?
Marc:He's doing great.
Guest:He's in New Hampshire.
Guest:I saw him.
Guest:Yeah, he sells theaters in New Hampshire.
Guest:He's got a good following.
Marc:Where the fuck did I see him?
Marc:I think he stopped by.
Marc:I was surprised.
Marc:And yeah, I think it must have been in New Hampshire.
Marc:Because I remember him from New York, too.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:There was another cop.
Marc:Diresta was a cop.
Marc:Yes.
Guest:Joe Diresta.
Guest:He was in the car, too.
Guest:It's funny.
Guest:Imagine it.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:We were doing a cop show or something, too.
Guest:Two cops in the car.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:And no one thought to not go for the fake gun.
Guest:No, John DiResta put his hands on the ceiling immediately.
Guest:Right, when the guy walked out?
Guest:Yes, Justin screwed up.
Guest:Because he was dressed as a cop as well.
Marc:Yes.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:It was scary.
Guest:But this is like...
Guest:When a cop pulls you over, just know they're so stressed out.
Guest:They just go to this domestic thing.
Guest:The guy's throwing his feces on the floor, and then you go there, and then you go somewhere else where they're calling you this much.
Marc:Just the knowledge that cops...
Marc:after a certain point you would think you would have seen everything but you haven't because people are a quote that i've been using a lot from michael clayton like people are incomprehensible so you like you know like you think that there's some sort of
Marc:kind of like a context for human behavior until you, like, yeah, you find the guy throwing shit on himself, you know, with something in his ass, and he's about to set his dick on fire.
Marc:Right.
Marc:And you're like, hey, sir, please, can you put the torch down?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:It's like, I was on the phone with my brother, and he was like, I gotta go, a guy's drinking cleaner fluid on his porch.
Guest:I was like, okay.
What?
Guest:On purpose.
Guest:And then you go to the precinct and they're all kind of being jerks to each other because they're all trying to let out this thing.
Guest:Sure, you got to bust balls, right, just to get some relief.
Guest:They got to have therapy or meditation 20 minutes a day.
Guest:It should be mandatory in precincts, I think, because they're dealing with so much stress.
Marc:Are you saying they do it?
Guest:No, they should.
Guest:It should be.
Marc:Well, I think that there's been lots of attempts to integrate some sort of mindful kind of like relief process
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But like, you know, after a certain point, it's like, no, fuck that.
Guest:And on top of that, you go home and the news is like, you're an asshole racist, basically.
Guest:It was like the news about cops.
Guest:So it's really a tough job.
Guest:So, but he's all right?
Guest:He's doing all right.
Guest:I think he's got two more years till retirement.
Guest:Oh.
Guest:He's got like a countdown.
Guest:Is he a detective or?
Guest:No, like patrol.
Guest:Oh, really?
Guest:He wanted to do that.
Guest:Patrol.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Stay active.
Guest:Now he regrets it, but in the beginning you're like.
Marc:Maybe if he'd gone to San Francisco.
Guest:Yeah, I would have been the guitar.
Guest:He would have been chilled out.
Marc:Man.
Guest:What's the other brother do?
Guest:That's a sister.
Guest:When did that happen?
Guest:Used to be a brother.
Guest:Just kidding.
Guest:She's a teacher.
Guest:She had kids and everything.
Marc:That's nice.
Marc:She's older.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Older?
Guest:But you know her.
Guest:Yeah, but we weren't as close.
Guest:Me and my brother talk every day.
Guest:Every day?
Guest:Pretty much, yeah.
Guest:When he's out in the car?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Just give him a quick call.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Going on a call.
Guest:Diarrhea town.
Guest:Be right back.
Guest:What is that?
Guest:It's just, I just felt bad for him, but.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:He's a good guy.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:A really good guy.
Marc:Well, it's nice that you talk to him every day.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So you grew up in the house with the plane.
Marc:We had the plane, the small plane.
Marc:And your mom?
Guest:Mom was a mother.
Guest:Mm-hmm.
Marc:What grades does your sister teach?
Guest:She teaches special autism kids and stuff like that.
Marc:Oh, yeah.
Marc:That's important.
Guest:That's another easy job.
Marc:Oh, my God.
Marc:They both just signed up for- I know.
Guest:And then I signed up for vacation.
Marc:Yeah, always.
Guest:That's my job.
Guest:Just being a goofball.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:It is kind of weird.
Guest:What'd your dad do?
Guest:He was a lawyer.
Guest:Oh.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:He did plane crashes, actually.
Guest:That was his specialty.
Guest:When he first started, he wasn't-
Guest:He wasn't making that much money.
Guest:At the very end of his life, he started to make money.
Guest:And he did the Lockerbie crash.
Marc:Really?
Guest:He was on the council, and then he was lead council.
Guest:The Lockerbie one, that was a bomb, right?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:So he was representing people who were on the flight?
Guest:No.
Guest:He was on the bad guy side, the insurance side on that one.
Guest:Oh, really?
Guest:He was part of the team, but he didn't like it, and he switched over to doing the other side, the plaintiffs.
Guest:and it was lead counts on the Croatia crash.
Guest:I don't remember that one.
Guest:It was like Ron Brown, some senators were in the plane.
Marc:Was that shot down?
Guest:No, they hit a mountain.
Guest:Oh.
Guest:And my father figured out there was outdated maps, so they were liable, the plane company.
Guest:And so what happens when they're liable is the widows get...
Guest:the money that the person would have earned.
Guest:So this plane was filled with like 17 multi-millionaires.
Marc:It was a small plane, private plane.
Guest:And so the first widow got like $17 million.
Guest:And then my dad got the brain tumor.
Guest:So he couldn't finish the case.
Guest:That was in a settlement?
Guest:The brain tumor?
Guest:Yeah, it was part of the whole package.
Guest:And my father got like, he had to split the money with that because you get like a third.
Guest:So we got like $5 million for that one person and there's 16 more.
Guest:So he would have made like $60 million had he lived.
Guest:But he luckily made enough to?
Guest:Like $2 million to take care of my mom and stuff.
Marc:She's still around?
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:That's nice.
Guest:Same house?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:She knocked down her childhood home and built a house.
Guest:Oh, not the one you grew up in?
Guest:No.
Guest:Interesting.
Guest:She's in Westport now, like down the street.
Marc:That's nice.
Marc:Westport's pretty.
Marc:Westport's nice.
Marc:You got the little town.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:You got the aging actresses and actors there.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Paul Newman was there.
Marc:No longer, yeah.
Marc:Died.
Guest:Who's the other aging actress you're thinking of?
Marc:I don't know, I just, like, I dated a girl from, my first girlfriend's mother was sort of an actress and involved with the theater, and she ended up in Westport.
Marc:I don't think she's there anymore, but, like, you know, they were around, it seemed.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:Like the Arkans, aren't they?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:What's her name?
Guest:The Martha Stewart.
Guest:Uh-huh, uh-huh.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Westboro Playhouse.
Marc:Yes.
Marc:I'm sure she worked there.
Marc:That must have been it.
Marc:I think she, yeah, she might have been involved with that at some point.
Marc:My mother did tickets there when she was 12.
Marc:When she was 12?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And was she an actress?
Guest:She wanted to be, yeah.
Guest:Oh.
Guest:So she pushed her little boy into it.
Guest:She pushed you into it?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Oh.
Marc:Did you do commercials when they drive you into New York?
Guest:Read commercials.
Marc:Did she?
Marc:She did a little bit.
Marc:Pushed me a little bit.
Marc:All right.
Marc:So you're growing up.
Marc:Your brother was athletic, the cop?
Guest:No.
Guest:He was like smoke or tough guy.
Guest:He was like, what's that?
Guest:We both have the same voice, but he brought his down when he turned 14.
Guest:He's like, what's that?
Guest:We talked the exact same.
Guest:Then suddenly he came home and said, I talk like this?
Guest:No.
No.
Guest:I'm going to be a cop one day.
Guest:Pick up diarrhea.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:What's a diarrhea riff?
Guest:I don't know why, but I just imagine, he had to go on a call like that and it stuck in my head.
Guest:That there's a diarrhea problem?
Guest:Someone's throwing diarrhea.
Guest:Someone's throwing.
Guest:They're throwing their, yeah, their feces.
Guest:Uh-huh.
Marc:that's like kind of in us i mean it's a monkey thing and we're 98 monkey yeah i never think to really touch your no no like if i wipe and get some on my finger i'm sort of like well that's interesting maybe i'm not doing this right you think it's interesting well yeah well it's sort of like i i'm you know you get fascinated like the body's kind of amazing it just breaks everything down into this mess and you know and we move on yeah
Marc:The body's doing a lot of work without us even doing anything.
Marc:It is amazing how much is going on.
Marc:I never think to throw it, no.
Marc:And I don't think to pee on things.
Marc:Okay, well maybe you're more evolved.
Marc:Did you do 23andMe?
Marc:I did, and there was no, like on the checklist of things I wanted to know about myself, the medical checklist.
Marc:One of them was throwing feces, and I checked that.
Marc:And no one in my family.
Marc:No one in your family.
Marc:No, uh-uh.
Guest:No Cro-Magnon?
Guest:No.
Guest:Well, I'm sure there was, but we're not going back that far.
Guest:Do you like being, like, have, because you have a Jewish thing.
Guest:Like, you're Jewish, and you have this thing.
Guest:I'm very, like, I don't have a thing.
Guest:That's clear.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:You're a guy in search of a thing.
Marc:That's why you do all the voices.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:I don't exist.
Guest:I do other people.
Marc:Right.
Marc:Well, I mean, you do exist.
Marc:I mean, I get a sense of who you are.
Guest:Oh, okay.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:But in terms of genetically, I'm a mutt.
Guest:What was the breakdown?
Guest:It's all over.
Guest:It's Irish, Italian.
Guest:Really?
Marc:Your classic sort of first wave immigrant.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:It's like all the cultures that came here in the first wave of immigration in the 1800s or whatever.
Marc:They all had sex.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:There's a lot of Irish Italians mated.
Guest:What's the other one?
Guest:Is it mostly Irish?
Guest:No, there's just a lot of European, different Norwegian and all over the place.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Norwegian too?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Man.
Guest:Bunch.
Guest:You run the gamut.
Guest:A lot of mating.
Guest:Well, when did your people come here?
Guest:Well, my grandparents, great grandparents came over on both sides.
Guest:From?
Guest:Italy and Ireland.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:Ireland.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Have you been?
Marc:No, I want to go.
Marc:I think you could probably live there if you want to.
Marc:Can't you?
Marc:How much Irish do you have?
Marc:Done again.
Marc:That's Irish, right?
Marc:Yay.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I think you could probably just live there if you wanted.
Marc:Maybe I will.
Marc:Maybe I will.
Marc:Can I put the guitar there?
Marc:Is it like- Yeah, they love it.
Marc:You just have to change the rhythm.
Marc:So your mom is Italian?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Full on.
Marc:Mostly, yeah.
Marc:Mostly.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So you had Italian grandparents?
Marc:Yes.
Marc:That's nice.
Guest:Yeah, great food.
Guest:Where'd they live?
Marc:Westport.
Marc:Oh, yeah?
Marc:Mm-hmm.
Marc:And the other ones?
Marc:Boston area.
Marc:The Irish, of course, in Boston.
Marc:Newton.
Marc:Yeah, that's pretty good.
Marc:Tough guy, brother, sister who you don't really know that well.
Marc:Mm-hmm.
Guest:don't want to talk to her yeah well i love her but yeah we don't what's the age difference between you and her six years that's not that bad and your brother a year and a half oh right so you guys are right it right there and he i was supposed to be an abortion like they told my mother they should uh abort me because they should she almost died having him oh really so they said you gotta get rid of this one you gotta yeah you gotta take this one out yeah luckily she's gambled
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Is it though?
Guest:I don't know.
Guest:Maybe it's not.
Guest:I didn't ask to be here.
Marc:It's been hard, right?
Marc:It's not.
Marc:Life is hard.
Marc:You're 46 and you just want to do your voices and have people recognize you for it.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And, you know, I don't know.
Guest:Life's hard.
Guest:I think this is very we're living a very soft time.
Guest:This new generation is we're doing them a disservice, making them think that life is easy.
Marc:It's really hard.
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:I think they're adapting in a different way.
Marc:I think that every generation like I think that there's a lot of things that they have easier.
Marc:That's not necessarily that great.
Marc:I don't think they have any capacity for context in terms of history.
Marc:I think that the internet has made everything very present and very trivial in a way.
Marc:That there's no reason for them to sort of take note of what delivered them here, the nature of the struggle.
Marc:And they're paralyzed by convenience and completely plugged into a lot of kind of temporary and short-sighted bullshit.
Guest:Yeah, I think it's really hard.
Guest:Is that just old guy talk?
Guest:No, I think you make a good point.
Guest:I think it's really hard to grow up where, just the idea of the likes and stuff when you're a teenager, having to deal with all that.
Marc:Everything is available all the time and there's all these things that you know and you grow up engaging with screens.
Marc:The sort of realm of your imagination is limited to the compulsion to put everything that you think out into the world.
Guest:Yeah, and porn.
Guest:I mean, when we were growing up, I would rip out pieces in glamour and hide them under my bed.
Marc:Oh, the first time, yeah.
Marc:And there was a girl in my underwear.
Marc:Right, or your porn magazine, like you get hold of some weird... I'm a little older, so you get hold of some weird Betamax tape, and you're like, oh, my God.
Marc:And now, like, it's... I'm very suspect to why there's so much porn.
Marc:Like, in the fucking 80s, there was a goddamn Mies Commission about pornography and this culture and the dangers of it, and there was this whole...
Marc:conservative right-wing push to rid us of porn and now all of a sudden it's just okay for it to be everywhere?
Guest:Yeah, and has anyone done a study about, because now is the time to deal with kids that grew up where they were like, oh, that actress is hot, let me see her naked.
Marc:Yeah, I've done a personal study.
Marc:Porn will fuck your head up.
Guest:Oh, you did your own research?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:No, I definitely, it's conclusive.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I saw it when I was very young, 14.
Marc:You know, and it was even harder, well, much harder to find, but I got hold of some.
Marc:But at least you had to work for it.
Marc:Oh, yeah.
Marc:No doubt.
Marc:But outside of that, so young Kyle.
Marc:Mm-hmm.
Marc:What's he doing?
Marc:What was I doing as a child?
Marc:What were you doing as high school?
Guest:You were a song and dance man?
Yeah.
Guest:You know, embarrassingly, I kind of was.
Guest:I mean, I took tap and jazz with my mother when I was 13, and I didn't want to.
Guest:I was a follower.
Guest:Like, I sort of did what my mother told me to do.
Guest:Because, you know, your parents are, that's how you survive.
Guest:You please them.
Guest:And I just got this message to sort of listen.
Guest:Have you considered maybe you're gay or no?
Guest:No.
Guest:I consider it all the time.
Guest:The only thing holding me back is that I find the female body more attractive.
Guest:But other than that, that's it.
Guest:I think my dad, because my dad found my porn under my bed, I think he was relieved.
Guest:Not that he's against gay people, but I think he was worried maybe this would be tough for this kid.
Guest:My cap dancing son.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:My jazz son.
Guest:Jazz hand son.
Guest:So I think... So he's like, the kid's all right.
Marc:So he found it and he tucked it back under?
Marc:He gave me like a wink.
Marc:He let you keep it?
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:That's cool.
Marc:Pictures of girls in their underwear.
Marc:So you're going to tap and jazz with your mom?
Marc:What age is that?
Marc:Humiliated.
Marc:Like 13.
Marc:Oh.
Marc:Like too old.
Guest:And she convinced you that it'd be a fun thing?
Guest:Didn't have to convince me.
Guest:I literally did not think for myself until recently, I would even say.
Guest:I'm still kind of working on it.
Guest:I didn't really think to do, like, I would like music, but I would never think to buy it.
Guest:Right.
Guest:I...
Guest:And my mother sort of, amazing mother, but like this one area of sort of guiding me where to go, I think I didn't, I got the message that my voice didn't really matter.
Guest:They did a study in the 70s, which they never do now, but they would have a mother rattle a rattle in front of the baby.
Guest:All babies do this in stages, they do the same thing.
Guest:Is this part of your research to figure out what your problem is?
Guest:Well, accidentally, yeah.
Guest:Like, when I heard this, I was like, oh, that's me.
Guest:That happened to me.
Guest:Like what now?
Guest:So they rattle around in front of the baby, and the babies like and laugh.
Guest:They have them keep rattling.
Guest:They start to push it away.
Guest:They make them just keep rattling.
Guest:All babies then cry.
Guest:They have it keep rattling, and then all babies drool and numb out.
Guest:And I was like numbed out.
Guest:Like I would go.
Marc:From all the, what do you call it?
Marc:From the stimulus.
Marc:Just like, for example.
Guest:Your mother's needs.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And just like her example, I would go, I'm going to go outside.
Guest:And she'd be like, do you want to get a jacket?
Guest:No, I'm good.
Guest:You should get a jacket.
Guest:It's called out.
Guest:No, I don't want a jacket.
Guest:Let me get your jacket.
Guest:No, don't give me a jacket.
Guest:And then I'm walking out and there's a jacket being put on me.
Marc:you get the message your voice doesn't really that's interesting yeah i never thought of that but but i mean on some level that seems relatively maternal it is and it's a now i think most mothers do this but but when it comes to like you're going to jazz dance no i don't want to do jazz never even thought to say no i thought it i don't oh so you're already the hooks were in yeah i was a robot
Marc:Oh, you're saying at some point you just entered a state of post-traumatic stress from your mother's needs to make you do what she wanted you to do.
Marc:Drooling, numbed out.
Marc:Right.
Marc:So by 13, you're like, where are you?
Marc:What are we doing?
Yeah.
Guest:And I want to be clear, I have a great mother.
Guest:I love my mother.
Guest:There's nothing malicious.
Guest:And some other kid, my brother said, screw off.
Marc:So your brother was the one that's like, fuck you guys.
Marc:I'm smoking cigarettes and hanging out with these ne'er-do-wells.
Marc:And you're like, I'm gonna go dance.
Marc:Yeah, you got to stick it to him at some point, pal.
Guest:Are you getting me now?
Guest:Are you starting to understand my behavior now and the guitar playing and everything and the voices?
Guest:Almost.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah, but I mean- You're closer to it.
Marc:Well, I'm closer to it, but so tap and jazz at 13.
Marc:Then what happens in junior high and high school?
Guest:I remember a guy, not to keep harping, but he gave my tap shoes back.
Guest:He had to get them put on.
Guest:And he goes, one day I'm gonna see you on Broadway.
Guest:And I remember thinking, oh, gross.
Guest:Like in my head, I didn't say it, but I was like, I'm gonna be dancing.
Marc:Did you go to musicals with your mom?
Guest:yeah in new york was like we're going to the city to see guys and dolls exactly yeah and then i was in school i majored in theater and i just did not like it at where in college yeah i went but what happened in high school were you like i was that was actually doing the theater shows gave me a sense of myself for the first time so you were a theater nerd in high school
Guest:Yeah, I was the leader of the nerds.
Guest:I was the president of company, which was the theater group.
Guest:And you think that your mother was, this was her encouragement?
Guest:You know, yes and no.
Guest:I'm glad that she got me into this business and everything, but yeah, I think it had a big part of it.
Guest:So you did several shows in high school?
Guest:Mm-hmm.
Guest:Song and dance, man.
Marc:Some musicals?
Guest:Dancing up a storm.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:You still dance or no?
No.
No.
Guest:I never was very good.
Guest:There was a guy, he was a head of Alvin Ailey and he did the choreography, which is amazing.
Marc:At your high school?
Guest:In Weston?
Guest:The chairman of Alvin Ailey.
Guest:Why, because he lived in the area or what?
Guest:He was friends with the director.
Guest:So he just came up to do some charity work for us white, no rhythm kids.
Guest:We did The Wiz, I was the scarecrow.
Guest:We did flower drum songs, we were Asians.
Guest:We did Fiorello, and I played a Jewish person.
Guest:I never played a white person.
Marc:Oh, so that's sort of an interesting key.
Marc:So what was the Jewish person in what?
Marc:Morris Cohen.
Marc:In which show?
Marc:Flower Drum Song.
Marc:Uh-huh.
Marc:Did you talk like that?
Guest:I'm Morris Cohen.
Guest:I'm Morris Cohen.
Guest:Oh, no.
Guest:What do we do next?
Guest:Really?
Guest:You did that?
Marc:I did that.
Marc:Is that racist?
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:Not when you're in high school, I guess.
Marc:Maybe it would be now.
Marc:Be insensitive.
Marc:It's very insensitive.
Marc:I mean, I imagine with all those shows, everybody would just have to have flat affect.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:We had, I mean, we did Asians and all those white kids are, they'd made us do the makeup.
Guest:It was, there was not, would not be done today.
Guest:They put tape on your heads?
Guest:They didn't, they didn't do tape, but they did like makeup.
Guest:Oh really?
Guest:Like King and I shit?
Guest:Yes, exactly.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And then the, uh, on, I think it was flower drum song.
Guest:I had a solo and the chairman of Alvin Ailey was kind of going around the stage, writing the dance for me.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:And he's like, oh, this is going to be hot.
Guest:He said to me.
Yeah.
Guest:And so I did the dance, and halfway through, the audience is just laughing.
Guest:They're laughing at my dance.
Guest:So not hot?
Guest:Not hot.
Guest:And at the break, I go, I'm sorry, I don't know.
Guest:And he's like, no, it was supposed to be funny.
Guest:It was not.
Guest:He said it was gonna be hot.
Guest:That's what he promised.
Guest:I still know the dance.
Guest:I still know the move.
Guest:I want to do it.
Guest:I wish I could.
Guest:I'll do it later for you.
Marc:Well, yeah.
Marc:How are you ever going to forget something that scarred you so intensely?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:The first time you get just a room full of unintentional laughs when you're being serious.
Marc:It hurts.
Marc:Oh, man.
Marc:Because I started that dance like, this is going to be hot.
Guest:I was told.
Guest:Parents laughing at a kid who was trying to be a hot dancer.
Marc:How old?
Marc:What year was that?
Guest:That was 17.
Guest:That was senior year.
Guest:Wow.
Marc:Wow is right.
Marc:Wow.
Marc:But you had had some experience with being funny on purpose.
Guest:uh you know i did get voted class clown that kind of thing and but i was when i was in eighth grade i mean when you're doing shows and you know you do comedies when you're doing morris what's his calling yeah i mean you must have got is that was that i got some laughs on that was it is a comedy or no yeah that was a comedic part yeah right and then they we had like a talent show my friends were like you should do stand up again in high school my idea in high school high school yeah oh okay i just
Guest:did what people told me to do sure weird thing so that's what you are a follower yes yeah i'm actually i've broken it though now that i'm aware of it i have the tendency but i'm now i can point to it like instinctually when someone goes come on let's uh do you're like wait a minute let me think it through yeah do i want to kyle doesn't want to do that yeah but he will i speak in the third person kyle doesn't like to dance
Marc:But if you keep telling me I should, I will.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But so you've done, you're doing characters in high school.
Guest:I would do impressions and stuff like Michael Jackson, this girl I really liked, liked my Michael Jackson impression in like seventh grade.
Marc:Oh, so you had it turned on all the time.
Marc:That was your method of communicating, of getting attention.
Marc:Yes.
Marc:Because if you're not unlike many of us, you've got the full spectrum of high school nightmare clicks around.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And you could entertain all of them.
Marc:I was tiny.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:I felt invisible, and this was a way of- I'm glad you grew out of that.
Yeah.
Guest:i'm like one like 140 soaking wet but i graduated high school at 110 yeah a heavy 110 yeah it was a beanpole but but everyone knew you because you were funny with people i was a pretty small school 110 people so people knew me so there was no monsters no it wasn't too uh bad but i did no football team
Guest:There was, but they were terrible.
Marc:With 110 students, or is that just your class?
Marc:Class.
Marc:Oh, yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So, okay, so you're- Dancing away.
Marc:Song and dance, man.
Marc:And what happened with the stand-up experience in high school?
Marc:You did it?
Guest:It was bad.
Guest:I wrote 20 minutes that day, and we know that you don't do that.
Guest:Was it at a talent show situation?
Guest:It was a talent show, yes.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:So I went out and I did like some stuff and it was going well.
Guest:And then the host of the show came out and she said, Mrs. Ola's about to suspend you.
Guest:You can't.
Guest:This is in the middle of Stop the Show Dead, person whispering in my ear.
Marc:Because you're in the middle of your act and you're killing?
Guest:Yeah, it was going well and I was doing stuff.
Guest:What were you doing?
Guest:I remember doing impressions of some teachers and stuff like that.
Guest:You know, the easy stuff.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Well, no, it's not easy, but like in that context, it was looked at as a attack on authority.
Marc:Exactly.
Marc:Because you got to the principal and then someone said, stop him.
Guest:Well, they were upset about my language, which wasn't even that.
Guest:I think I said like penis or something like that.
Guest:That was it?
Guest:And she left and I told the audience, I'm like, I'm not allowed to say penis anymore.
Guest:So I told them what she said, trying to get a laugh.
Guest:Yeah, did you?
Guest:So then I started to say just other words for penis, and then they dragged me off stage.
Guest:They dragged you off?
Guest:They dragged me off.
Guest:Features?
Guest:No, there was two hosts of the talent show.
Marc:Like physically?
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:I mean, I kind of let them drag me off.
Marc:They were just taking me off.
Guest:That's part of the act.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Here I go.
Guest:Making a bit.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Then I got suspended for like two days.
Guest:Really?
Guest:You're like the Lenny Bruce of your small high school.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:You know how edgy I am.
Marc:Yeah, man.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:That's crazy.
Marc:Breaking the law.
Marc:So your mom when- My mom was there, luckily, because she saw that I wasn't that bad.
Marc:So when you got suspended, she said, let's go get some ice cream and maybe dance a little?
Marc:Yeah, she-
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:We danced.
Guest:And then there was a guy there, James Naughton.
Guest:You know, that was an actor.
Guest:Sure.
Guest:I remember that guy.
Marc:He's one of those Westport guys, right?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:He stuck up for me, which I really appreciate at that point.
Guest:He wasn't the one in American Werewolf in London.
Guest:That was his brother, David Naughton.
Guest:Oh, okay.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:He was in A Planet of the Apes, the TV show.
Guest:He played a non-ape.
Guest:James was?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Yeah, he would direct.
Guest:He would coach us acting.
Guest:We had an amazing, for a high school theater department, we had an amazing help.
Guest:It was great.
Guest:But then I got to college, and I did not like my acting experience in college.
Marc:I didn't fit in.
Marc:So you graduated.
Marc:You're suspended.
Marc:You put that on your resume.
Marc:You got suspended for a stand-up act.
Marc:I was upset.
Marc:I didn't do stand-up for like five years after that because of...
Marc:But you graduate and you what?
Guest:Did you apply to other places?
Guest:Yale?
Guest:No.
Guest:No.
Guest:I don't read well.
Guest:You mean, you have dyslexic?
Guest:I have something, I think.
Guest:I never got tested, but like.
Guest:Undiagnosed?
Guest:You don't have the will to read?
Guest:I don't have.
Guest:I went to like try to get untimed.
Guest:What does that mean?
Guest:SAT tests.
Guest:You can get them like on time.
Guest:Because I did well for what I read, but I couldn't finish in time.
Marc:I tested out of my language requirement in college.
Marc:Oh, really?
Marc:I just couldn't wrap my brain around it, dude.
Marc:I could not.
Marc:I could not.
Marc:What was the- I couldn't do symbolic logic.
Marc:I couldn't do mathematics after a certain point.
Marc:Language.
Marc:I chose French and I was just sort of like, you could take a test that would show that you're mentally incapable.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:To get out of the requirement, and I did that.
Marc:I tried to charm my teacher, but he wouldn't have it.
Marc:You just did terrible in French?
Marc:I just couldn't do it.
Marc:I didn't understand the grammar, the tenses.
Marc:It was a lot of work.
Marc:you well that's that's that's that's school you gotta learn that yeah i know if i couldn't like sort of uh song and dance my way through a class a little arts education through bullshit and uh uh you know like i couldn't write a paper it was just like usually if it was like a 10 page paper it would be like nine pages of of pretty good opening paragraphs that never really yeah zeroed in on a point yeah okay i couldn't do it i didn't do well in that either no you don't need that
Guest:There's so much you don't need.
Guest:And why do they not teach kids how to deal with their emotions?
Guest:They don't take an hour to go, hey, here's what's going to come up and here's some techniques to deal with it or whatever.
Guest:They just go, here's Charlemagne.
Guest:Here he was emperor or whatever.
Guest:We got to be going that way, right?
Guest:Right.
Marc:What, teaching kids about their emotions?
Marc:Yeah, and how to deal with life, like real life lessons.
Marc:No, I haven't, no.
Marc:You got to get those on the street.
Marc:Why?
Marc:Why can't you get them in school?
Marc:I think that's true.
Marc:I think you're right.
Marc:I don't, no one prepared me for anything.
Marc:Maybe it's your parents' job.
Marc:I don't fucking know.
Marc:All I know.
Marc:I'm not yelling at you, by the way.
Marc:No, I know.
Marc:But all I know is that, you know, I got out of college and I moved to LA and I didn't even know how to get an apartment.
Marc:I didn't know how to get a bed.
Marc:A mortgage.
Marc:A mortgage.
Marc:Well, that just happened.
Marc:You know, that was like I was in my 40s.
Marc:I know.
Marc:Why don't they teach seniors about mortgages?
Marc:I looked at a place in Venice.
Marc:How about how just to buy a bed that's not like a futon on the floor or how not to live out of boxes?
Marc:That should be a class.
Marc:How to buy a bed.
Guest:10.30 a.m.
Guest:I looked at a place, it was between Santa Monica and Venice, half a block from the beach.
Guest:It was $286,000 for two level, two bedroom in 2001.
Guest:I thought I had to pay the whole thing.
Guest:Me too, I used to do a bit about that.
Marc:Why didn't they tell us?
Marc:When people told me they bought houses, I go, how much?
Marc:They'd go like a million five and be like, where'd you get it?
Marc:Like I thought it was like a drug deal.
Marc:You showed up with a duffel bag of hundreds.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:No, I had no idea.
Marc:That place is worth $2 million now.
Marc:If I just knew about a mortgage, I'd be like, okay, I'll take that.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:At that point, it was probably zero down.
Marc:Great.
Marc:Unbelievable.
Marc:No.
Marc:Oh, man.
Marc:It's just archaic what they teach.
Marc:So many things it sounds like in your life.
Marc:If you had gone to San Francisco with a guitar, and if someone told you- I do sound like a San Francisco guy.
Marc:How you, you know, to do a mortgage, it would have been a different world for you.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And my dancing, everything.
Marc:I should have gone there.
Marc:Dancing.
Guest:I blew it.
Guest:You blew it.
Guest:I didn't know any better.
Guest:Well, you can still dance, I bet.
Guest:I can actually.
Guest:I can move well.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I'm not afraid to say that.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Like, I just, I can, I have a natural gift.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:yeah so what was the um why did you have a problem with the undergraduate degree you got in theater arts okay here's a class yeah movement for the actor it's called yeah they'd put on a tape for 45 minutes of sounds and you have to move around how you feel so it's like and people just moving around the room um
Guest:No guidance?
Guest:No.
Guest:You move around to the... You feel what you... Like that kind of crap.
Guest:And then in this other class, we would read a book like this one guy read Death of a Salesman.
Guest:No, it was the Stella streetcar named Desire.
Guest:Yeah, right.
Guest:So then you have to come in with your interpretation.
Guest:So he...
Guest:wrote on a mirror and lipstick, whore, and then he pulled on his pants and humped the mirror and then turned around and told us to go F ourselves and ran out of the room.
Guest:And he got an A. That was his interpretation of the, this was where I was.
Guest:It's raw, yeah.
Guest:I mean, he took a big risk there.
Guest:They didn't teach me how to get a resume or how to get a picture, how to get an agent, none of that.
Guest:I just left.
Guest:And if I, you know, I was still in that state of like being a follower, so I just stayed there instead of going, this is, I want out of here.
Guest:But you didn't learn anything?
Guest:No.
Guest:Come on.
Guest:I didn't learn anything.
Guest:I learned to- Did you do plays?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:This one- Do scene study?
Guest:Like not even well.
Guest:This one guy was like, oh, if you say, if you crack your voice, you sound more emotional.
Guest:So we would go around the room saying farewell.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:He'd point to you and you'd go, farewell.
Guest:And you'd go-
Marc:Great.
Guest:I wanted you to do it.
Guest:Oh, okay.
Marc:Farewell.
Marc:Farewell.
Guest:See?
Guest:That was a class.
Guest:Now, why I didn't leave four years, I did not.
Marc:And then what happens?
Marc:I just left.
Marc:Yeah, and then where do you go?
Marc:You're just wandering around?
Marc:I went to New York.
Marc:I was like, where's Marc Maron?
Marc:You went to New York.
Marc:So you just moved after college with no plan.
Marc:I'm going to be an actor?
Marc:Was that it?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Great plan.
Marc:Yeah, wear my tap shoes.
Marc:Yeah, nobody, you gotta, yeah, there's no tap work in New York.
Marc:There's a little.
Marc:It doesn't pay well.
Marc:Savion Glover and the other guy do it, though.
Marc:Yeah, you can't tap your way to, like, a... Yeah, still, people still dance, but you know, I started to realize, like, you know, people still want to be dancers, but you can, like, you know, there's, like, you know, Broadway shows, there's Vegas shows, they got dancers on boats, you know, I guess, it doesn't seem like a, like, it seems like a very small...
Marc:kind of talent pool but you know no one's doing anything new either you've seen all the moves you can see him on video yeah yeah someone's doing something new new with dance this guy can spin 30 times yeah but that's just flashy you know that's ballet stuff i mean there's still like honor the form kind of stuff you know but not we're not talking about rockettes stuff we're talking about
Marc:Alvin Ailey, they're probably doing something good.
Marc:Oh, I'm sure, yeah.
Marc:But who's going?
Marc:Who's going?
Guest:I don't want to watch dance.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I mean, I can go, but I'm not seeking it out.
Marc:I'm not checking schedules.
Marc:You're not checking the dance shows in town?
Marc:I should.
Marc:I feel like I should, though.
Guest:Maybe we should go to a dance together and just see how it is.
Marc:But you might end up crying and stuff.
Marc:Is that a problem?
Marc:No, I'll probably cry too.
Marc:I'm more likely to cry at a musical just because there's so many people exuding joy.
Marc:That's what you're afraid of.
Marc:You're afraid of crying?
Marc:No, no, I cry all the time, but I never, you know, when I should.
Marc:When's the last time you cried?
Marc:I got choked up the other day.
Marc:What the hell was going on?
Marc:I was watching a movie.
Marc:It was Amy Schumer's movie, of all things.
Marc:Which one?
Marc:I get choked up pretty easy.
Marc:I watched, no, the pretty one.
Marc:Oh, okay.
Marc:What was it called?
Marc:Am I Pretty?
Marc:I Feel Pretty.
Marc:I Feel Pretty, yeah.
Marc:I thought she did a great job.
Marc:She's a great actress.
Marc:I've seen her stuff, and I know that movie got a bad rap and whatever, but in terms of her comedic acting performance.
Marc:Great.
Marc:And they played it so straight, it was kind of impressive.
Marc:It was a pretty big conceit, real fairytale shit, but they played, outside of that, they played it pretty straight.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And I thought it was very effective and funny.
Marc:Yeah, I thought it was good, too, but...
Marc:And you worked with her for a long time.
Marc:Yeah, a long time.
Guest:Long time.
Guest:Well, let's get there because we're going to be here all day if we don't.
Guest:I know.
Guest:Look.
Guest:You tired already?
Guest:You know how busy I am.
Guest:I know.
Guest:What do you got to do?
Guest:I got to go pick up some wood.
Guest:Really?
Guest:I bought some reclaimed wood.
Guest:You're going to do some work?
Guest:I'm going to do an accent wall in my house.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Oh.
Guest:You think I'm just a song and dance man.
Guest:I do like woodwork and stuff.
Marc:You're going to do woodwork?
Guest:Yeah, I'd like to build stuff.
Guest:Does Huntsberger come help you?
Guest:No.
Guest:He's a leather guy.
Guest:Yeah, I don't need a leather guy.
Guest:He does leather wood.
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:He made me some leather things.
Marc:Did he really?
Guest:I didn't even know that I had a podcast with him for three years.
Marc:You didn't know that he does some?
Marc:Yeah, he made me some leather coasters because he saw I had some that someone else had made me, so he made me some.
Marc:I'll show you on the inside.
Marc:I'm trying to top the leather coasters.
Marc:Well, it was clearly he knew he could personalize.
Marc:He did a nice job with them.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Like, you know, like this stuff you get at Tandy, you know, where you just, you hit the hammer with the leather.
Marc:Oh yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:He's a cowboy.
Marc:You knew that.
Guest:That's right.
Marc:He is such a cowboy, but he's a real cowboy.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:He's moving out of here.
Guest:My guess he's going to Montana.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Get back to the horses.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:That's where he belongs.
Marc:All right, so you got the wood.
Marc:Okay, so we'll get you out of here so you can get the wood.
Marc:So you go to New York, and when do you start doing the comedy?
Guest:I started doing sketch and improv.
Guest:Where?
Guest:I joined different groups.
Guest:There's one group I had to pay money to be in it.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Who does that?
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:People pay money to get stage time.
Marc:They bring friends.
Marc:There's a lot of different, you know, you got to do what you got to do.
Guest:And I got this other thing, this other group.
Guest:I just realized there was no money in sketch and improv.
Guest:And so I was like, let me go back to try stand up again.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I went to the comic strip because they were the ones who would let you audition.
Guest:That's right.
Guest:The other clubs.
Guest:Right.
Guest:It wasn't your audition process of getting in.
Guest:So you get passed?
Yeah.
Guest:I got past, and I started doing some late night stuff, and then I started to get better spots.
Guest:Before I was ready, I'm very thankful.
Guest:I remember it was mostly guitar, right?
Guest:No.
Guest:I remember...
Guest:In the beginning, I started with the guitar, but I got rid of it pretty quick.
Guest:I felt like this is shameful.
Guest:This is not what people do.
Marc:Clearly, I remembered it.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:In my mind, somewhere in there, you're like, just the guitar guy.
Marc:It's a guitar act, right?
Marc:The guitar act?
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:I remember when I first started seeing you around, even as late as when you were dating Sarah Silverman, I'm like, the guitar guy?
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:When you're a comic that's so geared towards the real shit, the guitar guy never goes away.
Guest:The guitar guy.
Guest:I mean, I'm okay with it because I feel like if you're making people laugh, whatever you're doing is okay.
Guest:I mean, I feel like I shouldn't have backed away from that and took the peer pressure.
Guest:Is that what you think happened?
Guest:I definitely, you know, the vibe in New York was you do not go up with a guitar on stage.
Guest:So I just stopped doing it and tried to be like how other people were being and talk about it.
Guest:But my life, as you've heard, is not a great thing.
Guest:We didn't even talk about the plane.
Marc:I mean, how often did you go up in the little plane?
Guest:Not that much.
Guest:Maybe like once a year.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Did your dad fly it a lot?
Guest:Yeah, he flew it a lot.
Guest:Just to go to like New York or around?
Guest:Yeah, he would go to his law stuff.
Marc:Oh, that's nice.
Marc:Yeah, it was cool.
Marc:Then I'd have to fly.
Marc:But you never interested?
Guest:No, I wouldn't even get in a plane like that now.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:All right, so you give up the guitar against your wishes.
Marc:You buckled because you just... Peer pressure, follower.
Marc:I mean, I'm following the trends.
Marc:Well, I don't...
Marc:i don't know if that's following it's just sort of like you want to be a comic so like you comics you respect or like yeah maybe you know lose the guitar or something yeah and i was told to lose it too by managers and stuff really yeah who were your who were your guys when you were coming up who'd you like to watch and stuff i mean you really david tell oh yeah um i did like you know dana carvey and stuff but it just wasn't happening that kind of comedy wasn't happening in new york
Marc:So how'd you evolve?
Marc:What were you doing?
Marc:Because I kind of lost touch or interest, I can't remember.
Marc:I'm sure it was interest.
Marc:You're very funny now.
Marc:I like watching you when you go on now.
Guest:Oh, thanks.
Guest:I did Conan O'Brien, I got that, and then that got me out to LA.
Guest:Oh, okay.
Marc:What, 2000 something?
Guest:Yeah, I think it was 2000.
Guest:Yeah, I just did some acting stuff.
Guest:I got some sketch shows.
Guest:I did, like, Saturday the Entertainer Presents.
Guest:I joined mid-season.
Guest:I thought I'd made it, like, a bunch of times.
Guest:I thought, here comes the rocket ship.
Marc:Well, yeah, right, but were you doing mostly impressions or just being yourself?
Guest:No, I never was doing impressions on stage or characters.
Guest:I just did it for the auditions.
Guest:And those were the auditions I was getting.
Guest:I never got a sitcom or anything where I had to read a script.
Guest:As yourself.
Guest:Never.
Guest:I only got shows that were like your character.
Guest:So you got the Cedric thing and you're like... And I did like...
Guest:Jamie Foxx had a sketch pilot that I did.
Guest:That was like, to get a part, it was like six auditions, and I get there, and there's no writers.
Guest:Two of his friends who just got out of jail were the writers.
Guest:And our first table read was, there was no ending to sketches.
Guest:And Jamie Foxx was coming once a week, and the first table read, he threw the script.
Guest:He goes, fuck the script.
Guest:You do you.
Guest:And then he left, and the executive's like, no, you have to do the script.
Guest:We weren't allowed to write for ourselves as a WGA rules or something like that.
Guest:Anyway, Eric Andre was on the show too.
Guest:When it was over, we were like, what was, what was that?
Guest:What was that called?
Guest:Yeah, that was called, uh, it was the Atheon Crockett show at one point into flow where they changed it to, it had a lot of, um, iterations.
Guest:It didn't, it didn't go anywhere.
Guest:No, I think it was on like one episode.
Marc:Andre was on too?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:That must have been something.
Guest:The two of you just like, what is happening?
Guest:Yeah, and then we go to the after party.
Guest:It's just a nice restaurant, and we walk in late, because we just had sweat and mustaches from the actual taping, and Jamie Foxx is standing up, long table, and he's going down the table, what's your favorite animal?
Guest:And everyone's just like, a goat, I mean a raccoon, just all scared.
Guest:And then he goes, what's your second favorite animal?
Guest:Goes all around.
Guest:And then he goes, the first animal's who you think you are.
Guest:The second animal is who you actually are.
Guest:I told Tom Cruise that, and he said it blew his mind.
Guest:And that was it?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:And then, thank you for helping out.
Marc:We're not going to be continuing.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:When we finished the pilot, he made a speech, and it was like, Fox executives were there, paying for these audiences to stay there.
Guest:And he's making a speech about, I told you so, and it was not good.
Marc:But Reno kind of broke you a little, right?
Marc:Reno 911?
Guest:Yeah, although I look nothing like or sound anything like that character.
Guest:No one ever recognized me.
Marc:But you do a lot of characters now, especially now with this Instagram stuff, where you're just like, even though you're, I don't even know what...
Marc:application you're using to make all that happen, but you know.
Marc:Face swap.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Oh, it's just that basic?
Marc:It's called face swap and they just put someone's face on your face.
Marc:Oh, that's it?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah, but you can't really see you, but you can see you on the, some of the goofier ones where you're doing characters.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:Where, yeah, they're very Dana Carvey inspired-ish.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:Like the news guy.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:What's that guy?
Marc:Oh, yeah, Craig.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:It's going on, I guess.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So you just like build those guys from the inside.
Guest:Yeah, I always did that character, that Craig character.
Guest:You just didn't give him a job?
Guest:No, my mother actually would do characters with me for hours, where I would think, we should stop doing this, even as a child.
What now?
Guest:My mother would, we would do, she would like role play.
Guest:And so I would, we would play like characters and stuff.
Marc:She would do characters too?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:How old were you?
Marc:Six.
Marc:Oh.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So this was before the dancing.
Marc:Before dancing, yeah.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:So it was more child play.
Marc:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marc:If you were doing that in high school, it'd be.
Guest:No, we didn't do that, no.
Marc:That was pre-pubescence.
Yeah.
Marc:But the writing stuff, so you're doing stand-up, you're doing all the shows we all do, you're getting attention stand-up-wise.
Marc:You're funny.
Guest:A little bit.
Guest:I mean, I never felt completely comfortable with what I was doing on stage stand-up-wise.
Guest:I could never watch my sets.
Guest:I did well enough to do shows and do okay.
Marc:Yeah, all the Conans and the thises and the thates, right?
Guest:Yeah, but I recently, I'm changing my act around.
Guest:You did Comedy Central Presents.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I actually saw you there.
Guest:Do you remember?
Guest:We did the same day.
Marc:Which one?
Marc:I think I had two.
Marc:Oh, yeah, the sheep.
Marc:What a bad idea that was.
Marc:It just didn't look right.
Marc:Well, why were they telling us to put our, we don't know what our background should be.
Marc:Well, but most people are just sort of like, I read into it.
Marc:I'm thinking about the mise-en-scene.
Marc:I think I'm like a rebel, so I'm the one sheep that's going the other way.
Marc:But basically, it was just a big picture of the asses of sheep.
Marc:and then there was a sheep on stage and no one stopped me.
Marc:But we still remember it.
Marc:Well, I look at it and I'm like, I'm doing my standup routine and there's literally sheep's asses surrounding my fucking face.
Guest:You were the sheep guy to me.
Guest:I'm the guitar guy to you.
Guest:You're the sheep guy.
Guest:I go, oh, the sheep guy?
Marc:I had a big, it was a big plan but how I thought in any world that anyone would read that properly and that I would think that much of myself as I am a rebel so like on the sheep that turned the other way and it just is like, why is there a sheep up there?
Marc:You overestimated your audience?
Marc:It was just dumb.
Marc:Someone should have stopped me and just said, just put Mark Maron up there.
Marc:Once people just put their names up there, I'm like, that's reasonable.
Marc:I did two of those.
Marc:The first ones, I put a sideshow banner on.
Marc:I'm like, I want a freak show banner behind me because I feel...
Guest:You know, like that.
Guest:Yeah, you shouldn't be in charge.
Guest:I mean, you're a great stand-up, but you should not be in charge of set design.
Guest:I remember right before I went on, the lady goes, you have my favorite.
Guest:Your set's my favorite.
Guest:And I got, because I felt insecure.
Guest:I felt like, oh, she loves my comedy.
Guest:I thought she meant my set, my stand-up set.
Marc:Because immediately you choose it.
Marc:That was the big thing with those first half hours.
Marc:You can choose your set design.
Guest:When I found out she meant my set design, I lost all confidence there.
Guest:I had just my name and some stars.
Guest:Little Christmas lights.
Guest:Very basic.
Marc:I liked it.
Marc:So you dated Sarah, but I don't really go in that direction, but you wrote for her.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:On the first show as well?
Marc:No.
Marc:Later.
Marc:No.
Marc:The new one, the Hulu show.
Guest:The Insight Machine was the first show I ever wrote on as a writer.
Guest:And she brought you in because she liked it.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Now, that was sort of always under fire.
Marc:Uh-huh.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And, you know, how did that pan out when the accusations of theft of sketches happened?
Marc:Like, didn't you get slagged for the magician one?
Guest:Yeah, that, I mean, I didn't because I think a lot of it's just, like, under the radar stuff.
Guest:But, like, that magician...
Guest:sketch that was my thing like i do magic hands or whatever but like i was there in the writing of it and the the part that's like in question here's what went down in the room yeah there's nine writers i can't even remember what was the magician bit the bit that was like someone else did it on youtube right these two exact bits this person did yeah and
Guest:What was the angle?
Guest:I mean, while it was like a magician in bed with a woman, he's pulling like a scarf out of her vagina, and then he like comes up, makes a balloon animal out of the condom.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:So you have a room of writers, and the head writer was like, okay, we need like funny things a magician could do in bed during sex.
Guest:Right.
Guest:So it just, after 45 minutes, someone comes up with a condom blowing up into a balloon.
Marc:It just happens.
Marc:And it just, those ideas.
Marc:No, I agree.
Marc:I know.
Marc:Like I've been in writer's rooms for it.
Marc:And you got to sit there and go like, is this like.
Marc:Yeah, they were very into like Googling.
Guest:This guy's, I mean, he had like 200 views.
Guest:It was, while we've been talking, a thousand comedy videos have been uploaded to YouTube.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:It's just like almost impossible.
Marc:No, I mean, it's true.
Marc:Like, especially with stuff that isn't insanely personal.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:That the possibility of somebody coming to the same bit is high.
Marc:Yeah, especially now.
Marc:Yeah, like, that's why I made the shift.
Marc:Like, you know, even there are some bits, if I talk about anything that's, you know, pop culture or whatever, I'm like, someone's got to be, you know.
Guest:Yeah, it's so not worth it.
Guest:No one wants to be called a thief.
Guest:It ruins your whole career.
Guest:It's like, they were very good.
Guest:There was someone who was like, that sounds familiar, and they would Google.
Guest:It's just impossible to get everything.
Marc:But you wrote for most of that, right?
Marc:And you performed on it.
Guest:Yeah, I wrote for all four years.
Marc:Did you used to open for her too?
Guest:Sometimes, yeah.
Marc:How's she doing?
Marc:You talk to her?
Guest:That's a way to be a comedian, what she does.
Marc:Opening.
Guest:Arenas, private jet, and then escort through red lights from the airport.
Guest:Just right to the thing.
Marc:Still?
Marc:She's still drawing like that?
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:So now, your primary focus outside, I see you do stand-up a lot and it's very funny over at the comedy store, but it's these Instagram videos where you put yourself in character with the face melding app.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:What is it called?
Guest:It's called Face Swap.
Guest:Right, Face Swap.
Guest:If you could refer to me as the king of Instagram, because I feel like when you just say something, it becomes true, like a Trump thing.
Guest:Sure.
Marc:Kyle Dunning, king of Instagram.
Marc:So, okay, let's go back.
Marc:Let me just give a note to my producer.
Marc:Don't cut what we said before.
Marc:So, Kyle, you're kind of the king of Instagram now.
Guest:Oh, thank you.
Guest:Thank you.
Guest:King of Instagram.
Guest:Kyle Dunnigan, one, yeah.
Marc:Yeah, it's great.
Marc:Good for you.
Guest:I love having a one at the end of my name.
Guest:That's at Kyle Dunnigan, one.
Guest:Yeah, my nephew told me it's not cool to have a number in your name.
Marc:Yeah, well, I mean, you just didn't get there quick enough.
Guest:No, this guy's got my Gmail.
Marc:He's got everything.
Marc:Oh, God.
Marc:Have you talked to him?
Marc:do you have a relationship we email because he sends me emails like this looks important but there's a bunch of he's not emailing me like he's gone quiet for a year and I'm sure I'm missing emails I think he's doing like he's dancing now I think I heard oh is he oh great yeah he's dancing and he does a guitar thing at the end oh my god I gotta see that act Kyle Dunnigan 2 you're Kyle Dunnigan 1 yeah but he's the real Kyle Dunnigan
Marc:I mean, according to Gmail, he is.
Marc:But the point is that you've done something creative with available apps.
Marc:You've done what people assumed that everyone was going to do.
Marc:You've made your own little thing with the available technology without a tremendous cost to yourself.
Marc:But I haven't seen it done before.
Marc:But then again, I'm not...
Marc:but you're the king, but I don't spend a lot of time on Instagram, but you'll do a lot of Trump in conversation with somebody else, whether it's, I watched a CK one, I saw a Pence one, but I think that was Bill Maher in Pence.
Marc:Okay.
Guest:Right?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Uh-huh.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But there's a lot of Trump talk.
Marc:There's a lot of Kardashian business.
Guest:Yeah, those get the most view of the Caitlyn Jenner stuff.
Marc:You as Caitlyn and all the other ones.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:You play all the people.
Guest:Oh, yes, yes.
Guest:And you do a pretty good Trump.
Guest:And they actually made a video.
Guest:Khloe was doing my bit in one of her Instagram stories.
Guest:Oh, really?
Guest:Yeah, and I got it.
Guest:On purpose?
Guest:Did she give you credit?
Guest:No, but she did it.
Guest:She kept doing, we're mad at you, which is the thing I do.
Marc:Oh, really?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:That's funny.
Marc:It was cool.
Marc:She stole something from your impression.
Marc:Yeah, she claimed it, which is the good thing to do.
Marc:Claimed it.
Marc:But you're okay with it.
Marc:Oh, I love that.
Marc:Would have been better if she gave you credit.
Guest:It would have been way better.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So now, where do you see this going?
Guest:To the top.
To the top.
Guest:right there i look at it like and i'm excited about this because this is like my tv show i have total control you know i got this audience now yeah and um i just love it how long does it take you to do those it seemed pretty some take so long because you've got to put the little box in of you with the how do you what's the production it it's gotten a lot faster
Guest:Really, I do go through like a writing process.
Guest:I shoot them kind of not just with my face without the face swap stuff so I can just see if it works.
Guest:When I first started doing this, I kind of got some flack for trying too hard because it's clear I'm trying really hard on my Instagram.
Marc:Yeah, like production values.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:And I thought, I'm going to keep doing... It's an outlet.
Guest:Fuck them.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I was like, oh...
Guest:And now people don't give me black anymore for that.
Marc:Well, I mean, I think it's like all these apps are really designed to entertain ourselves and then just dump it out there in the world.
Marc:Like, look what I did with the thing.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But you've taken this technology to this other place where you can actually cast an entire show with yourself, like a sketch show.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:you know using this thing but like how do you like i don't know enough about the technology to even if you were to tell me uh that i would be like oh right you know i couldn't even do that but it seems like to do the two uh face mash things yeah and then you know have one in a box so they can actually have conversation that that that seems to be a leap like you can't just do that on the the app right no i go to this um editing app yeah and uh it's pretty intuitive and
Guest:There was a learning curve when I first started doing it.
Guest:I just wanted to do a, I was looking to have conversations, and so I thought that FaceTime.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:It's like a natural thing to look at.
Marc:Oh, so that's what you're mocking.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I'm using that device, FaceTime, so it makes sense.
Marc:You actually use FaceTime?
Marc:No, but just the FaceTime where you see picture in picture.
Marc:Right, so that's what it looks like when you FaceTime someone.
Guest:That idea was huge for me, because now I could have conversations.
Guest:That's the key.
Guest:because I can have conversations now without cutting back and forth.
Marc:But what's the other, though, when you do all the Jenners and Caitlyn Jenner and all the Kardashians, that's more like a, what is it, go office or me office or whatever?
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:It's more of a leap.
Guest:It's a big FaceTime party.
Marc:Well, no, it's like one of those ones where I used to advertise for it, but I can't remember what it was.
Marc:There's a couple of...
Marc:of different apps that do that so you can talk to several people at a meeting in different places.
Guest:Yes.
Marc:That's more like that.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:So it doesn't look foreign to people watching it.
Marc:Right.
Guest:They accept it as, okay, that happens.
Marc:And it also looks like a fucking panel situation on a news show.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I've done that too.
Guest:And yeah, picture in picture is big on TV.
Marc:How many are you doing a week?
Marc:How many you got up there?
Marc:I try to do two a week.
Marc:Really?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:It's hard sometimes.
Marc:And what's the average audience?
Guest:Like viewership?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Like 200,000 views.
Guest:That's good.
Guest:Yeah, it's enough to where I feel like...
Guest:You know, I'm excited that it keeps me going.
Guest:Okay, but now here comes the bigger question.
Marc:What's the business model?
Guest:That's a great question.
Guest:I did get a deal.
Guest:I've been offered a TV deal, like a pilot kind of thing.
Guest:But for this, Instagram's going to start monetizing on IGTV, Instagram TV.
Guest:So I'm hoping to get involved in that because I am making zero dollars right now.
Guest:starting this podcast and I'll start putting that up on Instagram TV.
Guest:And if this TV show, if that thing happens, hopefully I'll be able to pay my mortgage.
Marc:But you obviously have this attentive crew of a couple hundred thousand.
Marc:Do you ever think about doing ads?
Guest:I have been offered to put it, I don't know, a washing machine, something like product in that.
Guest:I've been talking to someone about that.
Marc:As character?
Guest:Yeah, just somehow put it in.
Guest:I did one video where Kim was lost in her house and she didn't know what the washing machine was.
Guest:I could have got a free washing machine.
Guest:That kind of stuff, I will do.
Guest:Product placement.
Guest:Yeah, if it doesn't affect,
Guest:effect right but only one minute on instagram there's you don't have that much you have to compact everything people tune out if they hear but how about you know in terms of drawing them to your comedy shows that audience that's been great i'm able to do like small theaters oh really yeah all from the instagram all from the instagram now do you feel pressured to do the impressions now yes because i do the shows now and people shout out to caitlin or yeah baby and they'll shout out oh yeah stuff and it's all right with you
Guest:Yeah, I'm happy with it, but I do feel a little bit like I gotta get a Caitlyn bit.
Guest:Oh, right, right.
Guest:Really fast.
Guest:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Guest:And it's hard to get an impression in your act without looking like... Right.
Guest:Here's my impression of... Yeah, right.
Guest:I think it goes a little like... Like?
Marc:that's what turns you off about impressions probably or back when they turn around back in the old days right it's unacceptable turn back around yeah it's classic it's violating well you don't have to do it like that just you know just kind of jump around people can take it the best thing is if you have a story with them but I don't know this I don't know Caitlin
Marc:Well, you make it up.
Guest:All right.
Guest:But you're the guy who decided on the sheet background.
Guest:I don't know if I should listen.
Guest:I don't know.
Marc:But you know what I'm saying.
Marc:I'm just saying there's a way.
Marc:No, you're right.
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:No, that's a good idea.
Guest:I will do that.
Marc:Well, you could put a couple of characters.
Marc:Why not just do it like your conversations, but just make sure that somehow or another, without hitting it over the head, you introduce the premise in the conversation.
Yeah.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:You know what I mean?
Guest:Yeah, there's a way to do it.
Guest:Melissa Villasenor does impressionist stand-up really well.
Marc:Right.
Guest:Like that, like what you're saying.
Guest:Right.
Guest:Yeah, you can do that.
Guest:There's a way to do it.
Guest:Sure, man.
Guest:Get on it.
Guest:I did have a personal story with Bill Maher, though.
Marc:Okay.
Guest:I was on his private plane.
Marc:We're going to close with it.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:It better be solid.
Marc:It's not a bit.
Marc:It's not a good story.
Marc:But a morning radio ender?
Marc:It's a beginner.
Marc:Let me set you up.
Marc:So I heard you had an interesting encounter.
Marc:Could you do the king of Instagram thing to me?
Marc:Kyle Dunnigan, the king of Instagram.
Marc:Great funny stuff.
Marc:Thank you.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:We get a big kick of it.
Marc:Oh, great.
Marc:I'm sorry.
Marc:We get a big kick out of it.
Marc:Start again.
Marc:Start again.
Marc:All right.
Marc:I'm sorry.
Marc:So Kyle Dunnigan, the king of Instagram is here.
Marc:Thank you.
Marc:Back from break.
Marc:And we all here at the station have been watching those, you know, your Instagrams.
Marc:Oh, yeah?
Marc:Yeah, the Trumps, great.
Marc:Thank you.
Marc:The Jenner, the Kardashians.
Marc:We love that.
Marc:Mike Pence, very funny.
Marc:Thank you.
Marc:Though Christy, our weather girl, actually knows Mike Pence.
Marc:Oh, I'm sorry.
Marc:We don't get political here, but you know what I'm saying.
Marc:Sure, don't worry about it.
Marc:But no, but we were thinking...
Marc:Sorry, my fucking cough buttons.
Marc:With the king of Instagram, Kyle Dunnigan.
Marc:And so you do such a good Bill Maher on your Instagram.
Marc:They're all great.
Marc:Thank you.
Marc:Yeah, but Bill Maher, now I heard, correct me if I'm wrong, but I heard that you met Bill Maher, you have an experience with Bill Maher, that you have a problem with Bill Maher.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I was on a plane with him once, actually.
Marc:No kidding.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Like a commercial?
Marc:His private jet.
Marc:He's got a private jet.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:How do you like that, huh?
Guest:Amazing.
Marc:Doing all right in show business, that guy, right?
Guest:Yes.
Marc:So why are you on the private jet with Bill Maher?
Guest:Well, my girlfriend at the time- He's trying to-
Guest:Your girlfriend, he was?
Guest:Well, we were going to Hawaii and we missed the plane and she told him and he goes, I'm leaving tomorrow to Hawaii.
Marc:Who's your girlfriend?
Guest:Sarah Silverman.
Marc:Oh, at the time was Sarah Silverman.
Guest:So she's a big comic, so why wouldn't he be friends to her?
Guest:But he doesn't know you, right?
Guest:He doesn't know me.
Guest:He knows me as a guitar guy.
Guest:oh but he yeah but i heard that he loves sarah yeah and so he invited and i and i think he was bummed out he was going down there to hang out with woody harrelson probably yes i met woody too a great guy ever meet woody no no he was nice i was very much ignored i felt a little ostracized but he went oh he noticed and he like went over i thought it was really nice to him
Guest:Well, we've had Bill on the show a couple times.
Marc:Oh, really?
Guest:Sure.
Marc:But not Woody.
Marc:No.
Marc:Sarah was here plugging a tour years ago.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I'm still in character.
Guest:Oh, sorry.
Guest:So I get on the plane.
Guest:He's like, do you people really think there's a God?
Guest:There's not.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:So I get on there.
Guest:He did that on the plane?
Marc:He did that on the plane.
Marc:Did he do it over the speaker?
Marc:Welcome aboard.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:You people.
Guest:And I sit down.
Guest:He's just kind of ignoring me, which...
Guest:It's okay, but we were... It's a small plane.
Guest:It's a small plane.
Guest:And I was like, is this in my head?
Guest:And then Sarah was like, he's not being nice to you.
Guest:Mm-hmm.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:But I think it just, I get it.
Guest:He wants to go on vacation, and he doesn't know me.
Guest:And there's a guy who doesn't know, and I get it.
Guest:But you're on his plane.
Guest:Yeah, I was on his plane.
Guest:And then what happened?
Guest:I've been miserable on private.
Guest:You think private jets are doing good?
Guest:Never been on one.
Marc:You've never been on one?
Marc:Never been on private jet.
Marc:Don't travel in those circles.
Marc:This is me, Mark.
Marc:You could get your own private jet.
Marc:Not really.
Marc:You could fly a few places in your private jet.
Marc:Well, you mean you hire a private jet?
Marc:Yeah, you rent it.
Marc:What is it, like 100 grand per flight?
Marc:It's like 60,000.
Marc:Oof.
Guest:That's nothing to you.
Marc:From what?
Marc:No, it is something to me.
Marc:What do you think I am?
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:I'm fucking talking to you in my garage.
Guest:You're the king of podcasts.
Marc:Oh, yeah.
Marc:It's big money.
Marc:Big money.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Do you do ads?
Guest:I haven't heard any ads.
Guest:You do them later.
Marc:Yeah, I put them in later.
Marc:Oh, okay.
Marc:But I'm not during the conversation.
Marc:But I'm not private.
Marc:I'm not private playing.
Marc:You're not a private jet guy.
Marc:No.
Guest:It does seem like a waste of money, but.
Marc:I'll fly first class.
Marc:Ooh.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:That's fine with me.
Guest:Different world.
Marc:What?
Marc:You're Mr. Private Plane Guy, I guess.
Guest:I'm coach.
Guest:I'm coach.
Guest:Are you?
Guest:Unless I'm tagging along.
Guest:Or someone's flying you.
Guest:Someone's invited.
Guest:Right.
Guest:So let me just get something clear.
Guest:Is that the end of the Bill Maher private plane story?
Guest:Look, I told you this was not a great story.
Guest:Wow.
Guest:At the top.
Guest:Well, there was moments that were just uncomfortable.
Guest:Like he had a set.
Guest:He did stand up and he was coming back to the table.
Guest:Everyone's like, oh, he killed.
Guest:And then I said- You went to a show that night too?
Marc:I didn't go.
Guest:That was part of your vacation?
Guest:I didn't go.
Guest:He just had a show.
Guest:That's why he was going to Hawaii.
Guest:Oh, so the night before.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:And then we came back to the table after the show and everyone was like, oh, Bill killed.
Guest:So we sat down and go, hey, Bill, I heard the audience was pretty rough.
Guest:I was trying to make a joke of the opposite of what it was.
Guest:That's comedy, right?
Marc:And it wasn't the right thing.
Marc:You didn't read the rumor.
Marc:I didn't.
Marc:No, because Bill, I mean, maybe if you know him really well, you can bust his balls, but he doesn't.
Marc:I've never seen him handle that well.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Ever.
Guest:Ever.
Guest:I also tend to go when I'm nervous for the wrong.
Guest:Sure.
Guest:You lose your intelligence on what to say.
Marc:Are you one of those guys?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Working on it.
Marc:So you see Bill Maher and you're like, hey, Bill, there is a guy.
Marc:You're stupid.
Marc:I'm sorry.
Marc:What'd I say?
Marc:Kinda.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I'm aware of it now, though.
Guest:That's good.
Guest:Self-awareness is good.
Guest:It's the most important thing.
Marc:Well, I hope everything works out.
Marc:Thank you.
Marc:And you've always got the dancing.
Marc:I can always go back to that.
Marc:With the guitar.
Guest:Yes.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But I'm glad that the Instagram's kind of, it's exciting to pop in a medium that you have complete control over.
Guest:I'm telling you, I was midlife crisis-ing.
Guest:And now it's king of Instagram.
Guest:Now the king.
Guest:Wow.
Guest:Great.
Marc:Congratulations.
Guest:Thank you so much.
Guest:Good talking to you.
Guest:You too.
Marc:kyle dunnigan go see all his weirdness on instagram also youtube twitter uh no i have no musical instrument with me none
Marc:That was a jazz phrased improvisational humming.
Marc:It's hard to learn, but if you focus, you can do it.
Marc:Boomer lives!
Marc:Boomer lives!