Episode 955 - Anna Faris
Guest:Lock the gates!
Marc:Alright, let's do this.
Marc:How are you, what the fuckers?
Marc:What the fucking ears?
Marc:What the fucksters?
Marc:What the fuckadelics?
Marc:What the fuckpublicans?
Marc:What the fuckacrats?
Marc:Whatever.
Marc:How's it going?
Marc:I'm Mark Maron.
Marc:This is my podcast, WTF.
Marc:Welcome to it.
Marc:I hope you had a relatively decent weekend.
Marc:I hope you could find some space.
Marc:to have some of your own time and thoughts without the horror, the unfolding horror.
Marc:I'm not saying to have been able to distract yourself per se, but just to sort of acknowledge who you are, where you are, what you can do.
Marc:I had an email, a very brief email exchange with my father.
Marc:I just said, I said to him, I emailed my father and said, we're coming out for Christmas.
Marc:You guys going to be around.
Marc:Love, Mark.
Marc:He emails back.
Marc:As of now, we're here at Christmastime.
Marc:So a visit then is good.
Marc:But big families have unexpected problems.
Marc:So we will hope for health.
Marc:Love, Dad.
Marc:Now, that's not an irrational thought.
Marc:And, you know, he's talking, I think, primarily about his wife's family.
Marc:because ours isn't that big, but it's not, you know, it's a completely reasonable thought to have as an aging person.
Marc:A guy, my father's going to be 80 next month, but do you have to pre-plan?
Marc:Do you have to sort of make room right now for something that hasn't happened but might happen that is tragic and awful?
Marc:I guess maybe maybe I'm wrong.
Marc:Maybe that is the most practical approach to life.
Marc:Hey, man, sure.
Marc:I'd like to make something concrete.
Marc:We can put it down.
Marc:But, you know, the world could be over soon.
Marc:And I'm exactly like that.
Marc:But is it irrational to be that way?
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:It comes down to being in the present in this moment.
Marc:What can I do?
Marc:Am I doing enough?
Marc:Have I done something?
Marc:And can I enjoy this plate of eggs?
Marc:And then do what I got to do.
Marc:it's it's tough so today's show anna ferris is here now i don't really know her that well but i actually i don't really know her at all but i did her show she asked me to be on her podcast unqualified and right away there was an odd chemistry i'm not i'm not exactly sure what it was but i think that you you can feel it
Marc:In this episode, on this show, I like her a lot.
Marc:I think she's a great comic actress.
Marc:She's a fun person.
Marc:I like talking to her, but there is a dynamic.
Marc:It's sort of... I'm trying to think.
Marc:It's simultaneously...
Marc:That guarded, but boundaryless.
Marc:And I think after talking to her, I realized something about myself that I that boundarylessness, you know, having no personal boundaries when you're going out with it, when you're sort of breaking other people's boundaries just because it's your nature or when people come at you and you don't really have any boundaries.
Marc:Both of those may be sort of a strangely defensive situation.
Marc:Action.
Marc:I don't I can't really quite explain it.
Marc:I'm not saying it's a good thing psychologically, but the dynamic between me and Anna is is interesting to me.
Marc:And it was kind of fun.
Marc:So enjoy that coming up soon.
Marc:Another thing I wanted to mention was that I talked with this director.
Marc:His name is Ronaldo Marcus Green.
Marc:I met him a year or so ago in New York.
Marc:He had had a directed a short film called Stop that I saw.
Marc:And it was a pretty moving and beautifully shot story.
Marc:You know, it's racially charged in terms of what it is dealing with and what it's confronting.
Marc:But a very subtle story.
Marc:And very poetic.
Marc:He's quite a gifted director.
Marc:And I talked to him and you'll get to hear that episode in a little while.
Marc:But I did want to mention that he has a new movie in theaters now called Monsters and Men.
Marc:And I watched a screener of it.
Marc:I believe it's out.
Marc:It's out now.
Marc:And not unlike Daveed Diggs is blind spotting.
Marc:It sort of confronts the racial reality.
Marc:African-American reality, the reality of the other in a very compelling, poetic and realistic way.
Marc:He calls it a triptych where you're really following three characters around a recorded shooting by the police of an unarmed black man.
Marc:And it is not preachy.
Marc:It is not sappy.
Marc:It doesn't end with any sort of idea or attempt at solving anything.
Marc:But as a piece of cinema, as a film...
Marc:It is stunning in its storytelling and its poetry and the way it's shot.
Marc:I highly recommend that you check it out.
Marc:It's called Monsters and Men and look forward to my talk with Ronaldo.
Marc:It's his first feature, so he was pretty lit up and it was a great conversation.
Marc:We just couldn't get it up in time for the release.
Marc:And I do want to also say that I think you could still get tickets.
Marc:for my Dynasty typewriter gigs.
Marc:These are small, it's a small theater here in LA.
Marc:It's down in Koreatown, I believe.
Marc:October 4th, I will be there.
Marc:8 o'clock PM and October 6th, I'll be doing a 10 o'clock show.
Marc:You can get tickets at wtfpod.com, working out some stuff.
Marc:So come down if you're in town and you'd like to do that.
Marc:Okay, great.
Marc:So a couple of updates.
Marc:I don't want to leave you hanging like I thought my nail would be by now.
Marc:If you have been listening regularly, I don't know if I'm going to lose the nail.
Marc:I do know my finger is still a bit purple, but the nail hasn't completely turned black and it feels like it might be reattaching itself a bit, but maybe I'm living a dream.
Marc:uh also i guess i'll give you a little summary of what i did this weekend because it was kind of exciting i hosted uh the silver lake conservatory of music's benefit again this is the second year in a row that i've done that uh flea of the red hot chili peppers kind of was in a pinch last year and he thought of me and i was going anyways because if you recall
Marc:This is one of those stories where it's sort of like, yes, I'm hanging out with interesting people who I respect a great deal.
Marc:Last year, I was invited by Randy Newman to hang out at his table with his family, my girlfriend, Sarah the painter, Sarah Kane.
Marc:But this year, Flea just asked me back, and he gave me enough of a heads up to do it.
Marc:It's not an easy gig, but it is what it is.
Marc:It's an art auction.
Marc:You host a benefit.
Marc:There's a lot of rich music...
Marc:Related people there, not artists per se, but people within the business.
Marc:And last night was kind of an amazing night.
Marc:They did a great tribute to Mo Austin, who was the head of Warner Brothers Records and was the guy that championed just, you can't even believe the catalog of musicians.
Marc:So he was there and he spoke about the importance of music education.
Marc:Lindsey Buckingham performed.
Marc:And if you get a chance to see that, you should.
Marc:What an intense performer.
Marc:And just him and his guitar was astounding.
Marc:I'm actually going to be talking to him at some point.
Marc:Hopefully that works out.
Marc:KD Lang also did a set.
Marc:Astounding.
Marc:Astounding voice.
Marc:It was just an amazing, amazing night.
Marc:Saw my old friend Steve Brill.
Marc:But the high point, and again, maybe you're getting tired of this already.
Marc:Like, you know, my little stories with famous people.
Marc:But...
Marc:But this was sort of unexpected and kind of amazing because I didn't even notice this guy was there.
Marc:And I was talking to a sculptor with Sarah.
Marc:And then someone sees me who's facing me.
Marc:And the guy she's talking to has his back to me.
Marc:And he's got a hat on, a little cap.
Marc:And she goes, that's Mark Maron's behind you.
Marc:And then this guy turns around and goes, holy shit, Mark Maron.
Marc:And he's just all excited.
Marc:And it took me like four seconds to realize it was Brad Pitt.
Marc:And he was like, oh, my God, I can't believe I'm meeting you.
Marc:You know, you just lit up about it.
Marc:And he goes, I love your show.
Marc:I love your show.
Marc:And I'm like, well, he goes, no, no, Marin.
Marc:I've watched it.
Marc:I've watched the entire series twice.
Marc:And I rarely get that.
Marc:You know, Marin is sort of an acquired taste.
Marc:It's a little off the radar.
Marc:It's a marginal project, it seems, because I did it at IFC.
Marc:You can now see it on Netflix.
Marc:But in the U.S., you can get all four seasons, it seems, in the U.K.
Marc:and maybe Canada.
Marc:You can only get three.
Marc:I tried to fix that.
Marc:I don't know what to tell you.
Marc:But Brad Pitt was exciting.
Marc:He was talking about the arc of the show and how it started off, you know, finding its footing, and then it got going.
Marc:Then, you know, season three and four, holy shit, he was naming scenes.
Marc:And I just couldn't.
Marc:Fucking believe it.
Marc:Look, look, he's just a guy, but it is Brad Pitt.
Marc:I happen to be a big fan of his.
Marc:I think he's a great actor.
Marc:I really do.
Marc:And, but like to see him be the excited one was sort of, I don't know.
Marc:It was nice.
Marc:It was nice.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I tried to try.
Marc:I asked him if he would come on here and he said, he's not a very good interview, but then he said, but you can try, you can try.
Marc:So maybe that'll happen.
Uh,
Marc:Outside of that, I do think the message of last night or two nights ago of doing this thing is you see these kids that, you know, Flea has set up this amazing place, the Silver Lake Music Conservatory, for kids of all, you know, it seems like all ages and all economic classes.
Marc:They have scholarships available and stuff to just learn how to play music and a lot of, you know, like symphony instruments, like, you know, trumpets and violins and cellos.
Marc:And they have this whole school there because, you know, he...
Marc:When he was in high school, music changed his life, the music program at Fairfax High.
Marc:And when the L.A.
Marc:public schools started cutting the music education, it was just sort of his sort of secret agenda in his heart.
Marc:Once the chili peppers became huge, you know, to to to make make it available.
Marc:And it is important.
Marc:If I hadn't taken guitar, I don't know what would have, I didn't take it in school, but I don't know what my life would have been like.
Marc:Because it's a very important thing.
Marc:Not so much as a job or an occupation, but just to appreciate it and to have that ability to express yourself on any kind of musical instrument, even if you're not good at it, is a fucking amazingly heart-soaring activity.
Marc:But go check it out if you want Silver Lake Conservatory of Music.
Marc:I'm sure they could always use donations.
Marc:There's so many things to donate to to try to keep this a reasonable world.
Marc:Huh?
Marc:Right?
Marc:All right.
Marc:So right now, Anna Faris is on the show Mom, which is back for its sixth season.
Marc:Thursday nights on CBS and also you can listen to her podcast.
Marc:Anna Faris is unqualified wherever you get podcasts.
Marc:This is me and the inimitable.
Marc:Is that the word?
Marc:Anna Faris.
Marc:And I just had this air put on.
Guest:Can I talk to you about the light, though?
Marc:What do you want?
Guest:I sort of want it a little bit more dim.
Guest:What are you, out of your mind?
Guest:Yeah, I am out of my mind.
Guest:But, no, truly, that is a bright light.
Guest:And I just came from work.
Guest:I'm sweaty.
Marc:Do you want me to?
Marc:We're going to be in the dark.
Marc:Is that right with you?
Guest:Yeah, let's be in the dark.
Guest:Mark Barron and Anna Faris in the dark.
Guest:It's our new podcast, Mark.
Marc:What happened?
Marc:Did it go off?
Marc:No.
Guest:How about now?
Guest:Oh, that's great.
Guest:It's only half dark.
Guest:But wait, you weren't like chomping on my idea.
Marc:Which idea?
Guest:It was Marc Maron and Anna Faris.
Guest:I let you get top billing in the dark.
Marc:No, I'm into it.
Marc:I'm into it.
Marc:I think that like when I... I'm still fleshing out the concept.
Marc:No, I like the concept.
Marc:Is this dark enough?
Marc:I think it would have to be darker.
Marc:This is great.
Guest:Thank you.
Marc:No, but if we do the podcast, we have to not be able to see each other.
Guest:Are you cutting all of this out?
Marc:What do you mean?
Guest:I don't know.
Marc:I have gum in.
Guest:I just had gum in, and oddly, I was thinking like, oh, Mark is going to judge me for having gum in my mouth.
Guest:Why would I judge you?
Guest:I mean, I met you once.
Guest:And I adore you, but you can at times be a little bit judgmental.
Marc:I don't have any bad judgments.
Marc:Listen, opinions are good.
Marc:We didn't really know each other, and we had some boundary issues, I think.
Marc:You and I. I think so, too.
Guest:That's really interesting.
Guest:Wait, wait, wait.
Guest:Back it up.
Guest:What do you mean?
Marc:There are certain people that you meet in life where it's just kind of like, uh-oh, we already know each other for 10 years.
Marc:How did that happen?
Marc:I just felt like our boundaries weren't holding up well.
Guest:Do you think that that's... Do you know what I'm talking about?
Guest:Yes, I do, but I think that's a positive thing.
Marc:There's nothing wrong with it, no.
Marc:But it was almost like there was a familiarity that wasn't earned, but was there anyways.
Marc:Yes, I agree with you, but sort of.
Guest:But don't you think that there is a moment with people who, with celebrities that you interview and you talk with, that they don't, that they sort of finally...
Guest:kind of clue in into sort of the intimacy and they embrace it as opposed to being on the defense.
Marc:Well, I don't think anyone's on the defense, but I think there are people that... Just even by saying that.
Marc:No, but I mean, like occasionally people come in, usually people come in here and they know what's up.
Marc:You know what I mean?
Marc:They know we're going to sit here for an hour.
Marc:They've listened to at least one in preparation.
Guest:I don't get that gift.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So what usually happens is
Marc:The trickiest part of it is the public narrative part of it is like, is that, you know, are you going to get around that?
Marc:Like actors are different than writers and they're different than directors.
Marc:So actors kind of, especially if they have some visibility, they know how to make themselves available in a controlled way.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:I didn't feel that with us.
Marc:I felt like it was bordering on chaos.
Marc:I just felt like, is she going to be all right?
Marc:Who's going to come unglued here first?
Marc:Are we going to have to pause?
Marc:Because I think she's going to cry.
Marc:And I didn't even do anything.
Guest:Cry?
Guest:I just was like, oh, God.
Guest:What?
Guest:So I have categories when I podcast.
Marc:Are you going to tell me about your podcast?
Marc:This is how you structure it?
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:Why did you start?
Guest:Because I wanted to talk to you.
Guest:Well, I want to talk to you about that.
Guest:But I want to talk to you about.
Guest:Are we doing my show?
Marc:Whose show are we doing?
Guest:We're doing compels.
Marc:This is a takeover.
Marc:This is In the Dark.
Marc:This isn't a WTF.
Marc:This is the first, the pilot show, pilot of In the Dark with Anna Faris and Marc Maron.
Guest:Okay, but wait, as the original brilliant podcaster, Marc.
Marc:Well, okay.
Guest:Yes.
Marc:I'll take it.
Guest:Yes, please do.
Guest:Can you sort of categorize in terms of when you have a stand-up on or when you have a director on or when you have an actor versus a female actor?
Guest:Can I tell the difference?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Can you anticipate at this point?
Guest:Do you know what I'm saying, though?
Guest:What defenses you can anticipate?
Guest:Sure.
Marc:Well, I still like the other day, for instance, I had Slash come in and he's very accustomed to people like trying to get guns and roses dirt.
Marc:I had no interest in it.
Marc:So like when he realized that within the first few minutes, he was like, oh, we're going to talk about guitars.
Marc:Great.
Marc:And then all the defenses went away.
Marc:Right.
Marc:Generally, people are relatively upfront.
Marc:I can tell when people are guarded if they're expecting to answer questions.
Marc:Like if they don't know enough about the show or they are incapable of engaging in conversation, that's going to be a long haul for me.
Marc:I'll do it.
Marc:But, you know, that's usually one way.
Marc:And it doesn't happen too often that I don't know if it's defensive or a lack of familiarity with what I do.
Marc:But if they're sitting there waiting for me to ask them questions, you know, in a way that's like an interview, it's going to be problematic.
Marc:yeah but you know comics i have a shorthand with because i i know you know generally the spectrum of of emotional you know like i i feel like you and i like i i don't feel much distance you know between you and i whatever however you know mysterious or defensive you may be i have a sense i have a sense of emotional connection with you because i i'm not sure why maybe we'll find out but i like that thanks mark
Marc:What?
Marc:What do you like?
Guest:Which part?
Marc:I like that you have a connection with me.
Guest:And I like that it's sort of.
Marc:But have you played me?
Marc:Is that what's happening?
Guest:I do think that sort of the combination of people who start podcasts are both egotistical and curious.
Guest:And it's a wonderful combination.
Marc:And you have a bandage on your finger.
Marc:No, it's before podcasting.
Marc:Really?
Marc:What do you mean?
Marc:Whatever it was.
Marc:It wasn't relative to podcasting.
Marc:It may be relative to being a funny person.
Guest:I'm just saying we had this in common.
Marc:We had it in common.
Guest:It's like narcissism.
Marc:I got to the house.
Marc:It wasn't yours.
Guest:You were worried about me, which I guess is a sign of empathy?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Which is rare for you.
Marc:I work on it.
Marc:It doesn't come naturally, but I've learned it.
Guest:How?
Marc:By listening.
Guest:Oh, okay.
Marc:And by doing it on purpose, you have it.
Marc:Like, you know, I think you naturally have empathy, but somehow or another, because of whatever you've gone through as a person or whatever your life is, sometimes you shut it out because it might be too much for you.
Marc:If you're too sensitive a person, you know, they're called boundaries and detaching with a certain amount of concern.
Marc:But I always was empathetic, but I don't... And then you lost it?
Marc:I didn't lose it.
Marc:I think at some point, like, I...
Marc:I enmesh too much with people.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:And then, like, the empathy becomes problematic because you stop kind of living your own trip and, you know, you're constantly worried about them, which is sort of a reflection on you.
Marc:It's complicated.
Marc:Are you empathetic?
Guest:Well, yes.
Guest:I hope so.
Guest:I hope so.
Guest:But I feel like that's also a thing that, listen.
Marc:What are you all wrapped up with this narcissism idea for?
Marc:Has someone called you a narcissist?
Guest:Oh, I just fundamentally feel it.
Marc:You do?
Guest:Yeah, kind of.
Guest:Yeah, but I think maybe that's a good sign.
Guest:Do you go to therapy?
Guest:No, I come here to your house.
Marc:You've never gone to therapy in your life?
Marc:Oh, God.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Yeah, I have.
Guest:And it was, I went a couple of times, and it was sort of traumatic.
Marc:Traumatic?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:The therapist, or what came up?
Marc:It shouldn't be a traumatic, you shouldn't leave therapy going like, that person is dangerous.
Marc:What?
Guest:Well, I don't know.
Guest:So I came from a family where therapy was viewed as an indication of severe mental illness.
Marc:What are you talking about?
Guest:I know, and it wasn't until I moved to L.A.
Guest:that people were like, no, everyone's mentally ill here.
Marc:But I mean, where'd you grow up?
Guest:I grew up in Edmonds, Washington.
Guest:I was born in Baltimore and grew up in Edmonds.
Guest:Edmonds?
Guest:Edmonds, Washington.
Guest:Where's that?
Guest:Just north of Seattle.
Guest:I love it that you do your research.
Marc:Up in the gray place.
Yeah.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Yep.
Guest:Place of gloom and doom.
Marc:What do you want me to just read your biography to you?
Marc:What do you mean you don't think I do my research?
Marc:I want to hear it from your mouth.
Marc:So what am I getting?
Marc:Is this how you would conduct an interview?
Marc:So you grew up in Edmonds, Washington.
Guest:Now what is that about?
Marc:I read that on the internet that you grew up in Edmonds, Washington.
Marc:So we don't need to even ask that question.
Guest:Do you know what we were?
Guest:Our high school mascot?
Guest:No.
Guest:The Rainbow Warriors.
Marc:No.
Marc:Really?
Marc:Yep.
Marc:Was that a progressive thing?
Guest:This is kind of a boring story.
Guest:No, it was because two high schools combined because we didn't have the school district have enough money.
Marc:Yeah, I know.
Marc:So Edmonds, but you moved to... Yeah, anyway.
Guest:Went to University of Washington, then moved to L.A.
Marc:Hold on a minute.
Marc:Yeah, what?
Guest:What we're talking about here... You still haven't told me about the bandage on your finger.
Marc:This happened this morning, and this was traumatic.
Guest:I know.
Guest:Are you okay?
Marc:I don't know if I'm okay.
Marc:I think I'm going to lose the nail.
Marc:But that's funny.
Marc:And you have empathy.
Marc:I think I'm going to lose.
Guest:I just think that it's one of those things that everyone is going to look at.
Guest:Like when you're at Ralph's or, you know, at CVS, they're going to notice the nail but not say anything.
Guest:What do you mean?
Guest:As you lose it.
Marc:Afterwards?
Marc:When my nail turns black?
Marc:I've never lost a nail before.
Marc:Have you ever smashed your finger and lost a nail?
Guest:No.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:So where are you coming from with this?
Marc:You're just mocking me.
Marc:You're saying that eventually when your nail looks all festery and gross that people are going to be staring at it.
Marc:and not gonna be able to see me for who I am.
Marc:So my question really is about who were your parents?
Marc:What did they do that they would put some sort of wall up around therapy?
Marc:Was it a public standing thing or a principal thing?
Guest:No, no, no.
Guest:I think it was just something that I grew up in a community where that wasn't really done.
Guest:What community?
Marc:What did your dad do?
Guest:My dad's a professor.
Marc:Of what?
Guest:Sociology.
Marc:And he doesn't believe in therapy?
Guest:No.
No.
Marc:And what about your mom?
Guest:It's not that he doesn't believe in it.
Guest:No, my mom worked at my elementary school for a while, but she was a stay-at-home mom.
Guest:She taught?
Guest:No, well, essentially she did.
Guest:She taught English as a second language.
Marc:These seem like progressive people.
Guest:They are.
Marc:And they didn't know you had a problem early on?
Guest:Fuck you, Mark Maron.
Guest:Fuck you.
Guest:Of course they knew.
Guest:Don't you underestimate my parents.
Marc:they couldn't see it early on they were like bye go to LA but see you later well you have siblings I have an older brother who's also a sociologist a sociologist he is the fourth generation sociologist like apparently the world's only fourth generation sociologist I'm very proud of this so but they they just teach it to people and it becomes part of an education in a broader education towards something else yeah or is there a job for a sociologist
Guest:We are in professions where we are fascinated by our own selves.
Guest:Right.
Guest:So that's why, like, we're in the entertainment industry, because we cannot get enough of our own stories, our own whatever.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Well, yeah.
Guest:What the fuck?
Guest:That's what we're doing.
Marc:I tend to believe that people like to talk if you give them the opportunity.
Marc:Yes.
Marc:And I think that outside of people that are doing something selfless and important, most people will yammer on about themselves if you indulge them.
Guest:And we like to see stories about each other.
Guest:I mean, we're fascinated by our own selves.
Guest:I can't think of, I don't know.
Marc:Are you hosting a documentary of some kind right now?
Guest:Yeah, I know.
Guest:The cameras are right behind me.
Marc:It cuts to me talking about something.
Marc:We're fascinated by our own selves.
Marc:Example.
Marc:It's a sociology study.
Guest:But isn't that the thing about comedy, though?
Guest:And you know this better than anybody, that sort of the theory behind comedy is that it's like familiarity.
Guest:You're getting bored.
Guest:No, what do you mean?
Guest:Because I feel like when somebody says, uh-huh, they're getting bored.
Guest:I'm losing you.
Marc:I'm losing you.
Marc:No, I'm listening to you.
Marc:I'm just trying to- Stay with me, Mark.
Marc:I'm right with you.
Marc:Familiarity how?
Guest:Well, when you make sort of an obscure observation on something that isn't necessarily commented on frequently, it bonds an audience.
Marc:Well, no, I see that.
Marc:But that's just the material.
Marc:What makes somebody want to be funny, I don't think it's familiarity.
Marc:I think it's a need for connection.
Marc:Isolation?
Marc:No, a need for connection of some kind.
Marc:I think that there's something very rewarding about making someone laugh.
Guest:Of course.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So when did you start knowing that you had this need to entertain people and make people laugh?
Marc:Was it very young?
Marc:So your parents, they didn't send you to therapy?
Marc:They were like, maybe we should guide her somehow with her creativity.
Guest:Should we call my parents right now?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:You want me to hook up the thing?
Marc:No.
Guest:No, I don't.
Guest:No, well, and I know this doesn't sound relevant, but I was a really short kid.
Guest:Short?
Guest:Short.
Guest:I was physically very short.
Guest:I was by far the shortest in my class.
Marc:Really?
Marc:For how long?
Guest:Oh, until I was maybe a junior, senior in high school.
Marc:That's when you grew up?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:And how did that affect?
Marc:Your mom was what?
Guest:Well, my mom was always like forcing me to drink milk, which, you know.
Marc:Do you think that did it?
Guest:I do, in a weird way.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Sort of.
Guest:I don't know.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:That's a boring conversation, yeah.
Marc:Not really.
Marc:Don't be so judgmental on yourself.
Marc:So what does Short have to do with- No, I have more interesting things to say because I'm not judgmental.
Marc:Okay.
Guest:Listen, I view myself in a very, very fine light.
Marc:Really?
Marc:How long did that take?
Oof.
Marc:When did that happen?
Marc:Was that junior year too or maybe last year?
Guest:I can talk a big game, all right?
Guest:No, but I was always a really quiet kid.
Marc:Really?
Guest:Yeah, you probably.
Guest:I'm sure you were a quiet kid.
Marc:Yeah, but quiet because I was awkward.
Guest:Yeah, me too.
Guest:I had gear.
Guest:I had the kind of nipples that were sort of like no breast.
Guest:I don't mean to be... What does that have to do with...
Guest:Well, because I just wasn't, I just always felt like an outsider.
Guest:I wore a training bra that I did not need.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:Like, whatever.
Guest:Anyway, that's a whole, listen, this is.
Marc:That's just to get you used to the clasps.
Guest:Yeah, I can't get any, this is the fucking clickbait that I was driving over here and I was like, what is going to be the clickbait that I say?
Guest:I put my foot in my mouth.
Marc:Why do you think that you're like such a, like one of those people that they're always looking for clickbait for?
Marc:Is it because of your relationship with your ex or because of you?
Marc:Do you think they are?
Marc:What do you mean?
Guest:I don't know if people are looking for clickbait for me.
Guest:You brought it up.
Guest:I know.
Guest:If I Google you, there's like nine things.
Guest:On my feed, like your great interview with Kristen Bell and Mila Kunis, and it's like there's those splashy things.
Guest:It's like, well, you know, and if I say something right now as an example.
Marc:It's harder for actresses, man.
Guest:Yeah, it is.
Guest:Thank you for saying that.
Marc:You know, it's like, I can't believe what they did with that, you know, the Kristen Bell and the Mila Kunis.
Marc:It was just, they take things out of context.
Marc:They don't listen to the whole thing.
Marc:I don't think they necessarily, well, I think that they did create a moral sort of dilemma there, the clickbaiters.
Guest:I just, yeah, I think that my least favorite job would be a clickbait writer.
Marc:Well, that's what they all do.
Marc:And it's like, yeah, they're a little morally reprehensible.
Marc:And a lot of times... But they're listening to your show.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Well, I mean, I just... Thanks, clickbait writers.
Marc:I think sometimes their editors do that, too.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Like, that's just probably to get people to the thing.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But you being short and socially awkward... Oh, yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:So anyway, I explored, I did dramatic theater.
Guest:When you were a kid?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:How old?
Guest:I started when I was nine.
Guest:When I say that, it's annoying that it sounds impressive to me.
Guest:Why?
Marc:Does it sound impressive to you?
Marc:Well, I mean, were you doing like Equus at nine?
Marc:I mean, Shakespeare at nine?
Marc:I did.
Marc:Were you doing grown-up parts or nine-year-old parts?
Guest:My first gig was an Arthur Miller play called Danger Memory at the Seattle Repertory Theater.
Marc:Who directed that?
Guest:I can't remember.
Guest:He was highly qualified, I'm sure.
Marc:And you played the kid?
Guest:I played the kid.
Guest:That's right.
Guest:Got 200 bucks.
Guest:Bought myself a piano phone.
Guest:But anyway, I was a quiet kid, but I did do theater outside of school, and that meant a lot to me.
Marc:When did you first do it?
Marc:What was the feeling?
Marc:How did it get you out of yourself?
Marc:I mean, why did you...
Marc:lock into it if you were like socially awkward could you feel the transformation yeah another character you did i mean you must feel that way right i'm painfully stuck in my own character give or take i don't i'm not taking even even in my powerful acting roles it's not like it's a real uh you know like it's it's not a total departure it's just a a confinement a turning off of a few things
Marc:That's funny.
Marc:I got a lot of things going on all the time.
Marc:And when I have a character to play, even if it's me on stage, I'm like, I'll turn that off.
Marc:I'll turn this off.
Marc:This part's not necessary.
Marc:And I'll just offer that part.
Guest:Because for me, the escape was always through another character.
Guest:I wasn't great at public speaking.
Guest:I went to my 20th reunion, and people remembered me as being a really quiet person in high school.
Guest:And that's how I felt.
Guest:But my escape was through somebody else's words and somebody else's character.
Yeah.
Guest:But comedy has been an odd journey for me, I think.
Marc:Yeah, well, you're very naturally funny.
Marc:Because I'm an idiot.
Marc:I don't think you're an idiot.
Guest:Thanks.
Guest:I mean, I don't really either.
Guest:That's one of those narcissistic, self-deprecating things.
Marc:Yeah, I'm glad you're catching yourself.
Marc:And saying it as you do.
Marc:Please, every time it happens, go like, oh, that was just me doing something.
Marc:So you've chosen the large pencil.
Guest:Oh, I really like it.
Marc:No, I've not seen anyone take the large pencil out of the lizard cup and started playing with it.
Marc:Did you notice the lizard cup?
Guest:Listeners, this is a really good pencil.
Guest:Oh, yeah, love a lizard.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:but okay so let's get back to this yeah is it that interesting i don't know if it's whatever to answer your question though i don't ever escape from myself really i mean i can do it when i play guitar but when i do stand up it's can it's controlled in a way because i i know the parameters and this the skill set involved and it's it definitely but it's hyper present there's no escape
Marc:You know, and when I do like acting, which I've done a little bit of, I don't necessarily feel like I'm escaping, but I do feel the comfort of not having to use my own words and that there's a, you know, I'm wearing different pants than I would.
Marc:Not that different, but yeah.
Guest:What's like the most awkward wardrobe you've had to wear?
Marc:a sock over my... Over here.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:My nakedness was the most awkward, I think.
Marc:How did that make you feel?
Marc:Exposed?
Marc:Well, they took, it was my butt.
Marc:They were just going for it.
Marc:They got it.
Marc:They got my butt.
Marc:I just felt like it was something I needed to do.
Guest:Did they close the set?
Guest:Wait, I'm sorry.
Marc:I didn't mean to cut you off.
Marc:You were about to say something interesting.
Marc:Well, all the women on GLOW signed the release that they might have to do nudity, so I felt like I had to.
Marc:And I was just hoping it wouldn't be the front.
Marc:Not that, you know, I just don't need that meme out there.
Guest:So you're like fighting for women's rights by...
Marc:Yeah, I was fighting for women's rights, but saying that I'd be more than happy to show my ass on camera, but if we could stay away from the dick, that'd be nice.
Marc:You know, not because I'm not proud of it, but just because I don't need that meme out there for the rest of my life.
Marc:I just... Do you have any memes out there that you wish you hadn't?
Guest:No, no, no.
Guest:I just want to go back to the caveat of not because you're not proud of it.
Yeah.
Marc:Well, I don't want to sit here and go like, you know, I don't really like my... No, it's not.
Guest:It's fine.
Guest:No, I'm sure you must be proud of it.
Marc:You know, it does the job.
Marc:You know, it's good at doing both things it has to do.
Sure.
Marc:You know, it's not unusually, you know, people don't look at it and go like, oh my God, how do you even manage that thing?
Guest:It's like a solid 3.6.
Guest:No.
Guest:Oh, sorry.
Guest:3.8.
Marc:magna cum laude are we talking listen i don't know what are we doing morning radio no i don't know i don't know you started hey guys it's zing zang and the bing dong how do you measure it uh you know how do i even say we got anna faris on the line right now we're talking flaccid versus hard yo what's up you're promoting mom
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:How you doing this morning?
Marc:Pretty good.
Marc:We were just talking about dick size over here.
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:Oh, hey, guys.
Guest:Good morning.
Marc:So, Anna, is there one that's too big?
Marc:Is there one that's too big?
Guest:Oh, well.
Guest:That's a question that I ask my vagina all the time.
Guest:Oh, that's so funny.
Marc:You're so funny on all those shows and movies.
Guest:Oh, thanks.
Marc:So what are you doing in town?
Guest:Well, I'm promoting Mom, the show.
Marc:Sure, that's that show where you play the screwed up girl.
Guest:Yeah, I sure do.
Guest:I sure do.
Guest:What's the mother's name?
Guest:Well, Bonnie.
Guest:Bonnie.
Guest:No, no, the actress.
Guest:Allison Janney.
Guest:Oh, she wins awards.
Guest:I like her.
Marc:She was in the ice skating movie.
Guest:Oh, yeah, she was great.
Guest:She was great.
Guest:She was a lot of fun.
Marc:Well, you're doing a great job on that.
Marc:You've got a daughter on that.
Guest:Do you have kids that age?
Guest:Well, no, no, I don't.
Guest:How old is your kid?
Marc:You've got a kid.
Guest:I do.
Guest:I do.
Guest:He's six.
Marc:Oh, how's Chris doing?
Guest:Oh, he's great.
Guest:How's Chris?
Guest:Yeah, you and Chris friends?
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:Oh, no, we're great.
Guest:Everything's great.
Guest:You know, I just, I, you know.
Guest:Great talking to you.
Guest:We've got to go to break.
Guest:We're on with Anna Farrow.
Guest:Bye, Zig.
Guest:You were good at that.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So that's it.
Guest:Nice talking to you.
Marc:Bye, Mark.
Marc:So the acting thing goes from nine all the way through?
Marc:Or did you have...
Guest:Kind of.
Guest:I quit when I was in college because I thought it was so unrealistic.
Marc:And what did you study?
Marc:English.
Marc:And your brother's off doing sociology.
Marc:Your dad's a sociology professor.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Your mom's at home telling you don't need therapy.
Marc:That's weak.
Guest:But they were always really supportive.
Guest:My parents always... Were they conservative?
Marc:I don't understand the no therapy thing.
Marc:I understand the community thing.
Marc:You don't want to get a reputation, and the therapist is probably your dad's friend, and there was only two to choose from.
Guest:No, no, no, but there wasn't any therapist.
Guest:I mean, nobody.
Marc:In Edmonds?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I mean, maybe there were, but I... Not that you need it.
Marc:I'm just curious about it.
Guest:No, I totally need it.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Did you need it then?
Marc:You were socially awkward.
Guest:Probably, but maybe it wouldn't have gotten me to where I am.
Marc:Right.
Marc:That's true.
Marc:No, I get that.
Guest:On the hit CBS show, Mom.
Marc:Yeah, it's a good show.
Marc:Thank you.
Marc:I think it's a hard form, the three camera.
Guest:Oh, it is, isn't it?
Marc:Well, it's weird because I haven't watched them that much, but I recently watched something just by coincidence that Chuck Lorre had done with Alan Arkin and Michael Douglas, which is not a three-camera.
Guest:Because Kaminsky.
Marc:Kaminsky Method, which is written like Chuck Lorre writes.
Marc:But my observation was...
Marc:You know, everyone condescends a bit to three cameras and it's often talked about like, you know, are three cameras still like does that form even even though a lot of them on and many of them are hugely popular like your show.
Marc:There is sort of this notion that it is a bit of a vaudeville, you know, it is a joke to joke vehicle.
Marc:Right.
Marc:But I had this realization watching your show the other day.
Guest:What was it?
Marc:It was that for them to work, the characters have to be very well defined and very well performed in order for the sort of emotional spectrum to really be effective as a viewer for me to be moved or engaged.
Marc:Because if you really look at the writing, it is like there are a lot of jokes in there.
Marc:And that's a certain way of doing dialogue.
Marc:I mean, it's a way we're all used to.
Marc:But if it's not done perfectly, it could really land shitty.
Guest:It's so deceptively difficult.
Marc:Right.
Marc:No, I, and I think you do a great job.
Marc:It's very funny and I care about you.
Guest:Thank you.
Marc:And I understand your problems.
Guest:Thank you.
Marc:The character, the character.
Guest:I, um, no, I, I, I love doing it and I love the people I work with and it is, it is, um, it's deceptively difficult because, and this is the minutia of it, but, uh, because the, um, the volleying and the ping pong effect.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And truly the rhythm of the dialogue is... See, this is what I'm saying.
Guest:It's boring.
Guest:It's not boring.
Guest:Would you just talk?
Oh, God.
Marc:Seriously.
Guest:Now I'm going to have to take control.
Guest:You have this cool knife right here.
Guest:You tried that already.
Guest:Go ahead.
Guest:Do you give a gift to every... What?
Marc:Yeah, maybe.
Marc:Maybe you'll get your gift.
Marc:Not the knife.
Marc:I have mugs I give people.
Guest:No, I want the knife.
Marc:No.
Guest:I have an amazing knife collection, by the way.
Guest:You do?
Guest:You have a knife collection?
Marc:I do.
Marc:Why?
Marc:When did that start?
Marc:Oh, this is a good one.
Marc:It is?
Guest:Where'd you get this?
Marc:What is it, a buck?
Guest:No, it's probably... It's a Kershaw, and it's made in Japan.
Guest:And I think this is a famous knife maker.
Guest:Really?
Marc:Who gave this to you.
Marc:Let me see it.
Guest:No.
Marc:How do you know that stuff?
Guest:Because I have an amazing knife collection that I spent a weird amount of money on the first season of Mom.
Marc:You just bought a knife collection off somebody?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Off of who?
Guest:It was this guy that died.
Guest:Shelley Berman?
Marc:Was it Shelley Berman?
Guest:And they had all these amazing knives.
Marc:Shelley Berman, the comedian, had a lot of knives.
Guest:Because I always thought if I were to...
Guest:a weapon of choice.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Guns are tough for me.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:But I always felt like a home invader.
Marc:Right.
Guest:A knife.
Marc:What would you use?
Marc:Do you have them hidden all over the place?
Marc:Kind of.
Marc:You do?
Marc:I sort of do.
Guest:But I'm not a very paranoid person.
Guest:I don't like to live in paranoia.
Guest:See, I don't need therapy.
Marc:But you did buy a knife collection.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And you think that's a good one, that one?
Guest:Yeah, this is an amazing one.
Guest:Who gave this to you?
Marc:Someone left it in my old apartment.
Marc:What?
Marc:A long time ago.
Marc:And I was just like, great.
Guest:I feel like you know who this someone is.
Marc:I do.
Marc:Sure.
Marc:Let me see it.
Marc:No.
Marc:It was a woman who was subletting my apartment.
Marc:I knew it was a woman.
Marc:No, she was subletting my apartment in New York.
Guest:So, and she's a little bit crazy.
Marc:No, I think it was her boyfriend or something.
Marc:She wants this shit back, man.
Guest:This is good.
Guest:Have you not appreciated this?
Marc:It's got some weight to it.
Guest:Let me see.
Guest:I'm hesitant to hand it over.
Marc:Did the knife fascination start when you were younger or it's just new?
Guest:No, I always, like, because I was short, getting back to that, I was feisty.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Have you done knife work?
Marc:Have you trained?
Marc:No.
Marc:Oh.
Guest:No, should I?
Guest:I should.
Marc:No, I don't know.
Marc:What is knife work?
Marc:What does that mean?
Marc:Well, there's some skill set to all weaponry, I would imagine, that, you know, if you were going to get in.
Marc:Like, have you ever done West Side Story?
Marc:That might...
Guest:You know the dance where they throw the knife back and forth?
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:I can be a jet.
Guest:We're going to do like a female version.
Guest:But don't they all have knives?
Guest:I don't want to be Maria.
Guest:No.
Guest:No, I want to be a jet or a shark.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:When you're a jet, you are always a jet from your first cigarette to your last dying day.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So the knife collection.
Marc:So you were short.
Guest:I was an insecure.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Until, and I still am, but insecure I think until college maybe.
Guest:And then I felt like I got to reinvent myself.
Marc:As an English major?
Guest:Does everyone like go through, everyone goes through that.
Guest:Like when you start something new at that age.
Marc:Did you have that?
Marc:I think I was aspiring, like I would always look outside of myself.
Marc:for like you know how do i dress what should i like you know i didn't know like there was it was usually not stars or anything but it was like cooler kids in school like i remember when i made the choice just to wear a hanes pocket tee colored with a flannel shirt because jay fegan did that and i thought like that's a pretty cool way to be just a flannel shirt and the t-shirt under it jeans can i ask what year this was
Marc:Probably sophomore year of high school.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:And then at some point I shifted.
Marc:I decided only buttoned down shirts and perhaps a cap.
Marc:And that was because of a cover of a Tom Waits record.
Marc:I'm like, that's pretty good.
Marc:And I would take them to the cleaners and have them starched.
Marc:Wow.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:That is like premeditated casualness.
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:They made them really stiff and weird, but I like getting my shirts back in a box.
Guest:I went through this period when I was a freshman at University of Washington, where for the first time I felt like I was kind of getting some attention from guys, and I dressed insane.
Guest:I wore tiny little plaid skirts and thigh-high garter belts and big Doc Martin boots, and I would stomp.
Guest:Yeah, you're getting into it.
Marc:I'm just getting the look around.
Guest:I didn't know whether you were going with... No, I looked like I was 14, but not in a cute way.
Guest:But for me, it was like this moment where I felt... It was such a transition of like, okay...
Guest:I resented guys for looking at me, yet I craved it so much.
Guest:And I went from being like plaid, plaid shirted in high school to suddenly like, oh, I want to, like I'm getting sort of a rush off of this new found identity.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Even though it wasn't me at all.
Guest:I wouldn't.
Marc:It was sort of punky.
Guest:Yeah, but it still wasn't me.
Guest:It was still like consistently playing another character sort of.
Marc:Do you know where you got the look?
Marc:Was it just around?
Marc:It was just around.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:It was just around.
Marc:Doc Martens, plaid skirt.
Marc:I remember it.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:How long did that last?
Guest:Oh, maybe like three or four weeks.
Marc:That was it?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:What was the next shift?
Yeah.
Guest:The next shift I became, I think I sort of became more introverted again.
Marc:Oh, really?
Guest:Like jeans and oddly smelling polyester vintage t-shirts.
Guest:You know how there's that specific smell.
Marc:Yeah, it's like dry clean sweat.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:It's like dead person.
Marc:Kind of.
Marc:But yeah, the thrift store thing.
Marc:I don't know when I stopped doing that, but I stopped doing that.
Marc:Just that feeling on your hands when you go shopping there.
Marc:When you leave...
Marc:And you take that with the jacket.
Guest:But I think it's a confusing thing for anybody.
Guest:But especially that I remember feeling very angry at people looking at me when I dressed like that.
Guest:Which, of course, is like, well, I'm dressing like some kind of weird...
Guest:I'm clear I clearly want attention right but yet it was angry at people for giving it to me and so I had to have sort of a like I still sort of grapple with that kind of that kind of shit in my mind yeah I mean I don't know if men go through the same thing but I think women do yeah yeah I you know I never know why women are looking at me
Marc:It's like, I generally in my life, it's not been because I look at that hot dude.
Marc:I usually assume it's sort of like, what's his problem?
Marc:He seems a little needy.
Marc:Why is he looking at me like that?
Marc:You know what?
Marc:I've never had the feeling.
Marc:I never assume it's desire.
Marc:I always feel like it's like, I always feel like it's something I should apologize for, which would only make it weirder.
Guest:Are you good at unnerving eye contact?
Marc:Um...
Guest:You kind of look like you are.
Guest:Because I do remember in our podcast, when you came on my podcast, that there was a moment where there was a nerving eye contact.
Marc:Between me and you?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:What was that about?
Guest:I don't know.
Guest:You tell me.
Guest:I felt like you initiated it.
Marc:I don't know if that's true.
Marc:See, I think you're still trying to put most of the burden on me for whatever happened on your podcast.
Marc:But it takes two.
Guest:You're like, I'm just so worried about her.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Well, no, I just like you were like, it was just sort of look, man, some people you're kind of like there.
Marc:Look, you're kind of like whatever you can.
Marc:However, you fool most people.
Marc:That's fine.
Marc:That's how you get through life.
Marc:But like sometimes people have a vulnerability to them that, you know, other people can see.
Marc:It's almost like like a secret society of insecure people.
Marc:And every once in a while, you come upon them, and you're sort of like, all right, we can't talk for too long because it's too fucking weird, and I don't know why, and I got to go.
Marc:I don't know you, and it's just weird, and I got to go.
Marc:And that's just because there's a vulnerability that you can't hide from certain people because somewhere along the line, they've got the same...
Guest:portal that you do exactly but don't you think that you framed it sort of perfectly but isn't that why you started a podcast is sort of like the sort of I know it sounds grandiose but the idea of human exploration kind of I mean why did you start yours
Guest:Well, for a number of reasons.
Guest:I really wanted a sense of control of my own narrative.
Marc:Career-wise or in general?
Guest:In general.
Guest:I really wanted to talk to strangers without a celebrity element.
Guest:That sounds so whatever.
Marc:You wanted to pretend like you're a normal person?
Guest:Well, I wanted to, I'm a curious person.
Guest:I wanted to talk to people.
Guest:And so I thought, well, you know, I want to talk to people about the relationships.
Guest:Because I felt like I was constantly finding myself in airports, like talking to strangers about, and I'm not great with small talk.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Right.
Marc:So would they just approach you because they knew who you were or they didn't know who you were and you were just all of a sudden talking about their relationship?
Guest:No.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:If somebody approached me, I would be like, oh, thank you, whatever.
Guest:And I felt grateful.
Guest:But then it would be like, okay, so wait, where are you guys going?
Guest:So wait, is this your girlfriend?
Guest:What's happening?
Guest:I wanted to always...
Guest:I just wanted to know things about people.
Guest:I wanted to feel like I wasn't in... That's also why I have a bit of a news addiction.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Because it makes me... Because the world is ending and you want to try to stay on top of it.
Guest:It's unbelievably depressing.
Guest:But because living in L.A.
Guest:made me feel like everybody that...
Guest:I know is in, we're sort of in this Hollywood bubble and there was a relief thinking about grander things and whether that's like, you know.
Marc:You want to know things.
Marc:That's the point.
Guest:I want to know things.
Marc:Your curious mind.
Marc:I want to know things.
Marc:And you want to talk to people about who they are.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I want to give people advice as well.
Marc:That's really fun.
Marc:Can I give you some advice?
Marc:That's unqualified, right?
Marc:You give advice, but you're not really qualified.
Marc:Do you want to give me advice already?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:What advice do you want to give me?
Guest:No, no, we have to ask a question.
Guest:I have to ask a question?
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:Think of a question.
Marc:About a general question?
Guest:No, it has to be relationship-y.
Marc:Oh, it has to be relationship-y?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:So...
Marc:Do you think that people can get better if they have had dramatic sort of troubling relationships over and over again?
Marc:Do you think that eventually they can have a healthy relationship even though it doesn't feel the same as the troubling dramatic relationship?
Yeah.
Guest:Okay, well, Mark, let me ask you a couple questions.
Marc:Uh-huh.
Guest:So do you get, like, sort of a euphoric sense off of a troubling relationship?
Guest:Like, does it give you sort of the highs and lows that you're craving?
Guest:Not anymore.
Guest:Okay, not anymore.
Guest:So do you ever find, like, that... Okay, I know that you are not drawn... I gotta go, she's coming.
Guest:Oh, she's mad.
Guest:Okay, so you are drawn to... Well, listen, we're... No, no, I'm in a good relationship right now.
Marc:You?
Guest:Yeah, great relationship.
Guest:I think that I've never really been, I'm not a fighter.
Guest:I'm not a fighter.
Marc:Did you date guys that were fighters?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:And what happens, you just cry or?
Guest:No, I don't fucking cry.
Marc:Who the fuck do you think I am?
Marc:That sounds like you got a little fight in you.
Guest:I'm just like, yeah.
Guest:What the fuck is up with you?
Guest:There you go.
Marc:I thought you just said you weren't a fighter.
Marc:Now all of a sudden I feel like we have a problem.
Guest:No, no.
Guest:But it is like...
Guest:Like, I get exhausted easily.
Guest:You know what I'm saying.
Guest:Sim keeps telling me that I'm like a dude, which I take as a compliment even though the feminist in me doesn't want to.
Guest:But I think what he's saying is that I don't, I just don't seek out unnecessary, well, I don't seek out conflict, probably to a fault.
Guest:In fact, I know to a fault.
Guest:I've been told at work that I should be more, I don't know.
Marc:Speak up for yourself?
Guest:Yeah, but I also feel like, but why?
Guest:I don't have a problem.
Guest:I got my grilled cheese.
Guest:I'm good.
Marc:Yeah, but you don't want to be taken advantage of.
Guest:Yeah, but I don't feel that way.
Guest:Good.
Guest:And I think also that's what the podcast is also like.
Guest:Yeah, people like it.
Guest:It makes me feel, it's also an intimate forum.
Guest:Of course, you came up with all this.
Guest:Yeah, we're sitting here in the dark.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:You have a couple other people around, which is nice.
Guest:Where a celebrity feels safe for the most part.
Guest:I don't know if I always make them feel safe.
Guest:Do you feel like you make your guests feel safe?
Marc:Yeah, generally.
Marc:I mean, I don't know.
Marc:Of course I think they feel safe.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I mean, what do you mean safe?
Marc:Like when you say that, who's going to walk into your house and be like, I'm nervous.
Marc:I should have brought people with me.
Guest:No, no.
Guest:Well, yes, that's part of it too.
Guest:But like when you go on a talk show, it's like, okay, you've got six minutes to sell some sort of menu.
Guest:Right.
Guest:sort of manufactured story that you hope lands and the performance element and it feels good to have an intimate format where you're not being recorded visually and you know you can
Marc:Oh, definitely, yeah.
Guest:Yeah, you can relax.
Guest:It's just a long format, yeah.
Marc:Well, for me, I got into it primarily because I didn't know what else to do.
Marc:My life had hit a wall, and I'd done some radio.
Marc:And originally, it wasn't an interview podcast so much.
Marc:There was a lot of different elements, and then it sort of leveled off.
Marc:But in retrospect, I had a lot of resentment and cynicism and bitterness, and not unlike...
Marc:say, a 12-step program where there's a premium on talking to another person so you get out of your own head.
Marc:And I think a lot of what I was doing was getting out of my own head and listening to other people's stories and their wisdom or their experiences.
Marc:So you think you listen?
Marc:Definitely.
Marc:I had to learn.
Guest:That was a little rib.
Guest:I'm sorry.
Marc:No, I know.
Marc:I listen, but it's tricky.
Guest:No, you do.
Guest:I'm sorry.
Marc:I interject a lot.
Guest:I'm a jerk.
Guest:Your listeners are going to think I'm a jerk.
Marc:No, I interject a lot sometimes, but that's usually just because I want to keep it going.
Marc:yeah yeah no you're very you're amazing i mean you truly created this whole thing i didn't create interviewing or talking we should all give you a cut of our the ads yeah no no you do your own thing i'm happy i helped out in any way that i could but so you you're wearing transition you're wearing um combat boots doc martens they're not doc oh yeah oh yeah
Marc:And you're running around in plaid skirts and going to college and you're studying English.
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:And I have no friends and I can't find my circle.
Marc:Oh, really?
Marc:You're a loner person?
Marc:Totally.
Marc:Do people hate you?
Guest:I didn't know how to make friends.
Guest:I still don't.
Guest:I still don't.
Marc:So what shifts for you to make you decide to go back to acting?
Guest:What was the plan?
Guest:So I was a fifth year student.
Marc:Yeah, I did that.
Guest:You did?
Guest:What did you major in?
Marc:English.
Marc:You did?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I did five years undergrad.
Marc:The last semester was nothing but booze and three classes.
Marc:Yeah, I liked it because I was interested in a lot of things and I was able to do a lot of them.
Marc:Like I did some acting.
Marc:I did some writing of plays.
Marc:I wrote for the paper.
Marc:You know, I studied film.
Marc:I wrote poetry.
Marc:I edited the literary journal.
Marc:Like I sort of broad.
Marc:I didn't excel at all of them, but I definitely took the time to try things that interested me.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Why were you there five years?
Guest:I kept changing my majors.
Guest:Then I did a horror movie my final year of college.
Guest:I was planning on moving to London.
Guest:What were you going to do there?
Guest:I was going to work at this ad agency.
Marc:So the acting was off the table, really.
Guest:Yeah, I mean, I still was able to make, like, if I got a gig in Seattle, like a training video.
Marc:Oh, yeah?
Guest:Or whatever.
Marc:You're doing that kind of stuff?
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:Yep.
Marc:So there's some industrials with you out there?
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Marc:Do you have them?
Marc:What happened to those?
Marc:Why aren't they online?
Guest:Oh, man.
Marc:Where are the Anna Faris industrials?
Guest:That was my more dramatic work.
Guest:I did one for some insurance company where it's like a nurse training video where I'm a patient that gets told that she has cancer.
Guest:and uh i had to do this whole arc yeah in like 30 seconds it truly was it was it was a better masterful masterful yeah i like to think so you had to do a whole arc oh and the director really pressed me yeah yeah because your life is ending right now really yeah i was like oh god i gotta get there i gotta get there yeah did you get there i think i did yeah and what what was the copy
Guest:Oh, it was like, wait, what?
Guest:I have cancer.
Guest:But I don't understand.
Guest:And the nurse was like, okay, but here are the next steps that you need to follow.
Guest:It's, you know, and whatever, whatever.
Guest:Like, I wasn't even listening to her.
Guest:I was too in my head.
Guest:Like, I just can't.
Guest:Anyway, I think my character got over it.
Guest:I didn't read the reviews of that one.
Guest:Yeah, so then I got this horror movie and I... You got the horror movie in Seattle?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I was a local hire.
Guest:I was a cheerleader.
Marc:So you canceled the London trip?
Guest:Canceled the London trip.
Marc:Going to shoot a movie?
Guest:Well, the movie was in Seattle.
Marc:Right.
Guest:But after I did the movie, I canceled the London trip.
Marc:And which movie was that?
Guest:Lover's Lane.
Guest:Please don't look it up.
Guest:I'm not going to.
Guest:You're already like on your mouse or something.
Marc:I just want to know how it all begins for you.
Marc:And Lover's Lane was the first movie.
Guest:Well, I don't know if you're counting Deception, A Mother's Secret, which was the movie of the week.
Marc:Was that before?
Guest:That was before.
Marc:Was that when you were a child?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Okay.
Guest:I said tuna fish, yuck, or something like that.
Marc:Oh, yeah?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Do it again.
Marc:Give me a different reading.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:All right.
Guest:But see, the undercurrent is that I really like tuna fish.
Guest:Uh-huh.
Yeah.
Guest:Tuna fish, yuck.
Guest:That's good.
Guest:Tuna fish, yuck.
Guest:Tuna fish, yuck.
Marc:Ah, great.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Great.
Marc:That's great.
Marc:Thank you.
Guest:Yeah, thank you.
Guest:Thank you so much.
Guest:No, but then, yeah.
Marc:So after Weber's Wayne, you moved to LA?
Guest:Yeah, I decided, I don't know.
Guest:It just felt like, what the fuck?
Guest:Like, I have nothing to lose at this point.
Marc:And your parents were supportive all the way through?
Guest:They were, which was pretty amazing.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I think it's because they were pretty naive.
Guest:And I was very lucky that I landed into, I had a meeting with a great manager who's still my manager, which I don't know how I pulled those strings.
Guest:His name's Doug Wald.
Guest:And he's great.
Marc:You met him after Weber's Lane?
Guest:After Lover's Lane, he agreed to meet with me.
Guest:I pulled a couple of strings in Seattle, and then my mom gave me some miles to fly down to L.A.
Guest:to meet Doug.
Guest:And I didn't know what the fuck I was doing.
Guest:But then I went back to Seattle, and I was slowly packing up my things in Edmonds to move.
Guest:And I thought, all right, I'll wait tables.
Guest:I'd done that before.
Guest:And if I'm totally unhappy, who knows?
Guest:Maybe I can...
Guest:maybe i can write a novella that won't get published and you're like 21 years old yeah yeah and uh but then i ended up getting scary movie and that changed everything yeah although you did three of them four of them four yeah oh not five i didn't see the last three what no of course i did
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marc:So you're known for your research.
Guest:Me too, by the way.
Marc:Yeah, sure.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Quick skim.
Marc:Do a quick skim.
Marc:Don't want to miss any big moments.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But scary movie was a big moment.
Marc:Did you know it was going to be that big?
Guest:No, it was... I don't think anyone knew.
Marc:It was like one of those like, what the fuck?
Guest:Oh, I mean, you know, I didn't even know what a mark was.
Guest:I didn't know.
Guest:The first time Keenan, our director, called action...
Marc:Keenan Ivory Wayans?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I turned to my co-star and I was like, I don't know what to do.
Guest:And he was like, say your line.
Marc:Which co-star was this?
Guest:That was Johnny Abrams.
Guest:And anyway, yeah, it was, and I thought just the whole time I was just scared shitless and I thought I'm going to get fired because I'm not funny and I don't know what I'm doing and everyone else seems more glamorous and more experienced and...
Guest:Even though it felt like a large paycheck, I knew this is where I wasn't naive.
Guest:I knew that it wasn't large enough to keep me sustained for a long period of time.
Marc:No way to have a life.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But you had some acting training or none?
Guest:I did a little bit, but... When you were a kid?
Guest:Yeah, when I was a kid, but I have strong opinions about... Therapy and acting training?
Guest:Not so much therapy.
Guest:Listen, I concede to you on the therapy issue.
Marc:Okay, all right, fine.
Guest:I need it.
Marc:You haven't conceded that whatever happened on your podcast was two-sided.
Marc:But, okay, so let's talk about acting classes.
Guest:I think that sometimes it can be a little too manipulative and people should, like art class, like anything.
Guest:Make you too self-conscious.
Guest:Yeah, or you stray from your gut.
Guest:And I think any time an actor sort of strays from their gut, it has to be very gently massaged.
Guest:You know, it should be like a pottery wheel.
Marc:Right.
Marc:Or something.
Marc:No, I get that.
Marc:That makes sense to me.
Marc:Well, I tend to believe that, you know, that a lot of it is natural.
Marc:And, you know, how to use what you have naturally is really the trick.
Marc:You know, what's going to get you through it.
Marc:But you do fairly, I mean, you can really do characters.
Marc:Thanks.
Marc:You know, so like, you know, I haven't had that experience.
Marc:I haven't had a job like that as an actor and I'm not that, you know, kind of green, but I haven't had to really kind of make a completely different person.
Guest:I think that, um, I think that also sometimes acting classes can destroy confidence, which is, um, you know, that's, you have, you have to, you have to have the ability to feel brave or at least pretend like you feel brave.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Fake it.
Marc:Fake the fearlessness.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I remember I was up for this pilot, my first pilot after I got Scary Movie and I finished Scary Movie and it was my first pilot.
Guest:Scary Movie hadn't come out yet.
Guest:And it was down to myself and two other girls.
Guest:It was for Carsey Warner back in the day.
Guest:Anyway, whatever.
Guest:But I...
Guest:And, you know, when you are at that point, you sign your contracts and everything.
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:Everything's up front, yeah.
Guest:And you're, like, kind of like the other girls are sort of sizing you up.
Guest:And I'm just, like, sweating.
Marc:So you've gone through all the initial auditions.
Guest:Exactly.
Guest:Now this is for the studio.
Guest:This is for the network and everybody.
Guest:And so you walk into a room and there's, like, you know...
Guest:yeah 40 people right or whatever and it's all just fucking terrifying and uh and so i did my audition and then i i left the room and the casting director followed me out and she said okay so on it they like you she probably said whatever i'll let go yeah she was like so they like you yeah but i want you to come back in yeah and i need you to be way less nervous
Guest:I was like, I could feel my neck like starting to shake.
Guest:My whole head is trembling like I'm one of those wobbly skeletons.
Guest:And so anyway, I went back in and I remember having this thing like, okay, now I have to pretend to be a character who's trying to be another character, but the original character is not nervous.
Marc:That was the trick you played on yourself?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Did it work?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I got the role.
Marc:You did?
Guest:That was such a bitchy thing for me.
Guest:Well, not bitchy, but I did.
Guest:I did.
Guest:I got the role.
Guest:I got the role.
Guest:The pilot didn't go.
Marc:Right.
Marc:Were there a lot of those?
Marc:Like pilots and opportunities that didn't happen.
Guest:I've been rejected probably so many times that I, and I have no idea even like when like the rejection happened like four months before I even knew of the opportunity, you know, like some, you know, my agent calls a producer.
Guest:He's like, well, what do you think about my client?
Guest:They're like, no, no.
Marc:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marc:And they don't tell you.
Marc:It's their job to lie to you.
Marc:But I mean, after the scary movies, then like you did other movies and you did movies that were kind of real, like, you know, scary movies, its own thing, that genre, right?
Marc:But you do Lost in Translation, you do other movies where you're really kind of digging in.
Marc:What was the plan?
Marc:Because it seems like after a certain point,
Guest:Pay rent.
Marc:Yeah?
Guest:Well, no, no, no.
Guest:But I never felt, like I still struggle with the idea of comedy.
Guest:I'm not, it never felt like a natural film.
Marc:But that's your jam, really.
Guest:I know.
Guest:So that wasn't, you didn't want to do that?
Guest:No, no.
Guest:I mean, well, listen, I was happy to be able to do faces and say words.
Guest:Right.
Guest:and get an omelet every now and again.
Marc:Lost in Translation, that character was like, you know, I guess it was kind of a funny character, but it was a real thing.
Guest:Well, you know, I think that I feel really grateful.
Guest:For a while, I resented the idea of being in comedy because it wasn't something that I had set out to do.
Guest:And my mom would say things like, you need to be Amelia Earhart or Joan of Arc.
Marc:Well, Brokeback Mountain, that was like a big movie and weird, kind of shut down, emotional.
Guest:I have like, you know, whatever, maybe five lines in it.
Guest:But it was an honor to be a part of those important movies.
Guest:Right.
Marc:You played the wife of that bearded guy, right?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Right.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:But that, like, even for five lines, because, like, I'm sort of up against, you know, maybe, like, I'm doing a small part.
Marc:But, like, it resonated.
Marc:I mean, you loaded up.
Marc:You were emotionally appropriate for that situation.
Marc:Right.
Guest:Thanks.
Guest:I do love it that I felt like I got to be humiliatingly splashy in some of these pretty great projects.
Guest:And I think that Keenan, in the first scary movie, I think one time he saw me.
Guest:This is a story that I remember in my head.
Guest:I don't know if...
Guest:I think one time he saw me sort of enviously looking at Shannon Elizabeth, who was very sexy and she has like a sexier role.
Guest:And he like pulled me aside and he was like, you know, you know that there's no vanity in comedy.
Guest:Right?
Guest:And I didn't know what that meant.
Guest:And it wasn't about her at all.
Guest:He just saw me struggling with my own insecurity a lot.
Guest:And I really treasured that.
Guest:Like, okay, so if...
Guest:comedy is about being brave.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Don't you agree?
Marc:Well, the vulnerability that you show can... I think it's a mistake to think that comedic performances aren't insanely vulnerable.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Because people think he's making everybody laugh, but I mean...
Marc:There's a tremendous risk in that.
Marc:And also you have to be willing to be laughed at.
Marc:Totally.
Marc:Totally.
Marc:So I think that's why he meant, right?
Guest:Exactly.
Guest:It's the release of like, okay, I'm going to work under the assumption and embrace the idea that the audience will think I'm a fucking fool.
Guest:And...
Guest:And... Because I remember, like, an early... It's liberating.
Guest:...comment.
Guest:It's liberating, but it's also humiliating.
Guest:It's liberating to embrace the mentality of that.
Guest:But, yeah, I remember an early comment, like, on the internet was, like, about Cindy Campbell, my character in Scare Movie.
Guest:Like, I think that...
Guest:Ferris is as dumb as she plays or something like that.
Guest:And it did sting.
Guest:So I was like, why am I reading this shit?
Guest:But the idea that you have to be okay with people wanting to project...
Guest:a certain idea of you.
Marc:You have to be willing to... And also their own insecurities and their own bile and their own disappointment, their own shame.
Marc:You just become this sort of effigy.
Marc:You've become what they're going to project all of their own insecurities on.
Guest:It's mean.
Marc:The whole culture is like that now.
Guest:How long did it take to get over that?
Guest:Um...
Marc:Like to really detach from it.
Marc:Because it still stings a little bit, but you don't have to engage in it.
Marc:You just kind of let it be.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Well, I also feel really grateful that my journey has been comedy, even though that was not something that I set out to do, nor do I think that I'm... Sometimes I think I'm okay at it, but... Yeah.
Guest:Because it's so challenging to sort of reinvent an idea or a joke or a moment, like to...
Guest:Like even to get hit in the head, it's hard.
Guest:It's like to sort of give yourself up to a simple moment, which isn't simple.
Guest:It's incredibly difficult.
Guest:And it's hard to...
Guest:And comedy is about, like, there's a constant evolution of it.
Guest:And so it's sort of like, how do you, what is the, and I sort of enjoy that challenging element of it.
Marc:Well, it's a gift to be, you know, physical comedy is not anything you can really learn.
Marc:You know, either you have an instinct for it and you can build on it, or it's just like you can't do it.
Marc:Right?
Marc:And you're good at it.
Marc:thanks i don't think i i don't know i think you are willing mark i guess there's a difference no but like the timing right willing's fine but you can't just will timing do you know what i mean like even in that like that that movie you did um with ryan reynolds is like a weird guilty pleasure of mine oh thanks just friends i love that movie thank you i love him
Guest:I love him too.
Marc:And I loved playing that role.
Marc:Of the weird Britney Spears character.
Guest:It was so delicious.
Guest:It was so fun.
Guest:It was like I was getting to express everything obnoxious that I attempt to not do, even though I probably do it all the time.
Guest:But God, there's this moment where I'm like, stupid dick.
Guest:And I just, I was like, what fucking actress gets to say this?
Guest:I love this shit.
Yeah.
Marc:And he's another gifted physical comedian.
Marc:Like, there's some people that can just, it's innate.
Guest:He's a great, we, like, some actors are very internal, which is very much appreciated, but he's great with, like, volleying, the volley of, like, we would, like, kind of stay with each other.
Guest:Right.
Guest:and improv together and he would be like we would be just sort of calculating each other it was awesome there's this particular thrill when somebody's great at that that um where you can just get that thing going that banter that's what we had during my podcast and I think we had it today you and Ryan
Marc:You and I. Yeah.
Marc:No, I think so.
Marc:Yeah, so that's what it was.
Guest:See, now you are looking me steadily in the eye.
Guest:But I was diverting yours.
Guest:I'm sorry.
Marc:So it was two-sided.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah, I think so.
Guest:Now you're diverting again.
Marc:What do you mean?
Marc:No, I'm saying that you just admitted to it that that's what we were doing.
Guest:Oh!
Guest:Oh, shit, you caught me right in your trap.
Marc:Yeah, took a while.
Guest:Listeners, this is the Mark Maron spider web.
Guest:I'm in his dungeon.
Marc:The lights are off.
Marc:I was not insinuating anything other than... There's a hammer and a knife.
Marc:I wasn't insinuating anything other than we had a connection and it was good.
Marc:It was fun.
Guest:Mark has a fake bandage on his finger.
Guest:He's pretending to be a victim.
Marc:No, I smashed my finger in between two dumbbells today and I think I might lose my nail.
Marc:And it woke me up to reality.
Marc:what was it what was your awakening like well you know that moment right before you get into a car accident you're like this is gonna happen that's true so like i didn't see this happening but when i took my finger up it was like what the fuck my nails fucked because you're right there are moments like when you're in labor or when i was just thinking about that like when i hurt my nail i'm like it's kind of like having a baby and you're so right about the car accident thing it's like oh
Marc:But tell me about that, the labor thing, because I did think of that.
Marc:I realized immediately, because I hurt that finger too, but I realized immediately, this is minor, you'll deal with it, you might not be able to play guitar for a little while, but the nail thing, but the labor thing, I can't obviously imagine or properly empathize with, but it seems like, holy shit.
Marc:Did you do it for real?
Guest:How old is your kid now?
Guest:He's six.
Guest:He just turned six.
Marc:You had an epidural?
Guest:I did eventually.
Guest:But I was at Cedars-Sinai and they had a crazy... Women were giving... They had more births during a three-day period than ever in their history.
Guest:So women were giving birth in the hallway.
Guest:What?
Guest:And I was put into an operating room for a minute and then I think my doctor pulled some strings or... I don't know.
Guest:Anyway...
Guest:But it was crazy.
Guest:So point being, I was in labor for, I don't know, maybe seven hours before the epidural.
Guest:And I remember thinking a few things.
Guest:I remember thinking, I don't know how in movies women have the energy to scream.
Guest:Right.
Guest:Because there's absolutely nothing I can, I could, I couldn't possibly spend any more energy like emitting anything like out of whatever.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:You guys don't need to hear this stuff.
Guest:I do.
Guest:I like it.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Well, it's.
Guest:I don't know about it.
Guest:I always thought too that I was always like, you know, whatever.
Guest:I have a high pain threshold.
Guest:I'm cool.
Guest:Anyway, but.
Marc:But you had no idea.
Guest:And then I just remember thinking during those brief moments when you're not having a contraction, like, don't you forget this, Ferris.
Guest:Don't you forget this.
Guest:You were going to forget it just like your friends did.
Guest:You're going to fucking forget this shit.
Guest:And then like four years from now, you're going to be in the same position.
Guest:You're going to be like, what the fuck?
Guest:So I was like.
Marc:Remember the pain.
Guest:Remember, you must remember this.
Guest:But, you know.
Marc:And then you finally scream for an epidural.
Guest:You start to question things about the necessity of pain during childbirth, which we can talk about later.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I know.
Guest:That sounded cryptic, right?
Guest:I just don't want to get into my cynical thoughts about religion and gender and everything.
Okay.
Marc:Really?
Guest:Yeah, I really don't, because I do have to pee.
Guest:Oops, and I do think that you have to probably go.
Marc:I have to pee, too.
Guest:I do, too.
Guest:Yeah, you have a bathroom right there, right?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Why don't you pause it, and I'll pee.
Guest:And then you can think about my existential questions.
Marc:Okay, okay.
Marc:You go ahead and pee.
Guest:This was very good iced tea.
Marc:All right.
Marc:I'll check my messages real quick.
Guest:You're amazing.
Guest:Okay, let me know if you get anything good.
Guest:So wait, where's your partner now?
Marc:She's got her own house.
Marc:Four years.
Marc:Does she look close?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:You keep a Bible in the bathroom?
Marc:It was just in my books and I was in there, I thought I'd take a look.
Marc:How would it go?
Marc:I always get lost immediately when I read the Bible.
Like, what do you mean?
Marc:Lost in thought or lost like... No, it's just the language of it.
Marc:It doesn't appeal.
Marc:It doesn't... I can't wrap my brain around it.
Oh, that feels better.
Marc:Alright.
Guest:Oh yeah, thank you.
Guest:That was really sweet of you.
Marc:Did we just talk while you peed?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Great.
Guest:Okay, do you want me to talk?
Guest:Okay, I just didn't know if you get uncomfortable if somebody listens to you pee.
Guest:You can do this.
Guest:You've been doing it all your life.
Guest:No, I wanted to distract you, you know.
Marc:Oh, from hearing you pee?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Do you, are you, um, why do men like to be peed on?
Guest:I don't like to be peed on.
Guest:Yeah, but can you speak for your gender?
Guest:Huh?
Guest:Can you speak for your gender?
Guest:Why do some men like it?
Marc:I think it's a humiliation thing.
Marc:Some guys, especially guys who are in positions of power, enjoy being humiliated in a sexual situation.
Oh.
Marc:It turns them on because they don't get enough of it.
Oh.
Marc:I think something like that.
Marc:So, that was good.
Marc:I actually realized I was recording it all on my backup, so I'll leave it up to my producer as to whether or not that was good radio.
Marc:But, Mark... Tell me about your cynical views on religion and... I can't.
Marc:You can't?
Marc:Oh, because of the...
Guest:I just, well.
Marc:You think people pick it up?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:All right.
Guest:I also, they're not, they're very personal.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:And I don't want to be judgmental towards.
Marc:Right.
Guest:Listen, you know.
Marc:You don't have to.
Marc:It's fine.
Guest:Keep them to yourself.
Guest:I believe in empathy and, you know, whatever.
Marc:Doing good things.
Guest:But we were getting to a more interesting subject, which is why men enjoy being peed on.
Marc:we're back on morning radio i don't know what you're talking about anna but uh i maybe charlie does charlie yo what's up yo what do you think you ever had a woman pee on you charlie oh fuck yeah why do you do that ah zig here's the thing yeah i just love like a good fucking golden stream man yeah but what do you think that comes from emotionally where is it like why do you like that
Guest:It makes me feel like I'm getting ejaculated on by a hot fucking girl.
Guest:Okay, I got to dump the fuck on that one.
Marc:Yo, Mark, what the fuck?
Guest:What's up?
Guest:All right.
Guest:Oh, man, you know you love a good stream.
Marc:All right, Anna, are you still on?
Guest:Hi.
Hi.
Guest:I could have done better with a little more prep.
Marc:Oh, sorry.
Guest:I don't know who that guy was.
Marc:Yeah, he was close.
Marc:He was close.
Guest:Next podcast.
Marc:So you're getting along good with your kid.
Marc:You're getting along good with your ex.
Guest:Everything's wonderful.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:I didn't expect anything real there.
Marc:You're in an exciting new relationship that's good.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:And the show's doing well.
Marc:This is the fourth season.
Marc:This is sixth.
Marc:Fifth?
Marc:Six?
Marc:I love your research.
Marc:What do you want from me?
Marc:I told you what I'd do this for, to connect.
Marc:And I think we connected.
Guest:By the way, you're still wiggling like you have to pee again.
Guest:You're exhausted.
Guest:I've exhausted you.
Marc:No, I'm not exhausted at all.
Marc:I always wiggle.
Guest:Why don't you close us out with a little tune?
Marc:I will later.
Marc:I'll add that in.
Guest:All right, fine.
Marc:Okay, so season six...
Guest:Oh, is this the promotional part?
Guest:I didn't know we were supposed to do that.
Marc:Allison Janney's fun to work with, right?
Guest:Yeah, no, she's amazing.
Marc:You guys got a good thing going?
Guest:No, I'm so lucky.
Guest:I love her so fucking much.
Marc:You do?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Do you learn from her?
Guest:Well, yeah, I mean... You're both so good, though.
Marc:What if someone offered you a serious role?
Marc:Would you enjoy that?
Guest:Because I do learn from her, but I always feel like if I talk about that, it... What?
Guest:Because I feel like we are best friends, like contemporaries, and I...
Marc:Do you have that thing, the back and forth thing with her?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:I can feel that.
Guest:We have, like, anytime I get to do a scene with her, it's like we're dance partners.
Marc:She seems like a really solid, professional, but very engaged performer.
Marc:Like, when you watch her, it's sort of like...
Marc:You're watching something that is thought the fuck out.
Guest:Yeah, it's so true.
Guest:And she's also just such a great person.
Guest:Yeah, that's nice.
Guest:We have like, I think it's, I mean, you know what it's like sometimes with long-term working relationships.
Guest:Sometimes, you know, whatever.
Marc:Yeah, sometimes it's sort of like, see you tomorrow, and that's it.
Guest:But we're... Close?
Guest:We're really, really close.
Guest:And in fact, she was telling me that you keep bugging her to come here.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:But she told me to tell you to fuck off.
Marc:Are you paraphrasing?
Marc:Or was it really that?
Marc:She probably did say that.
Marc:Actually, now that I think about Allison Janney, why wouldn't she say exactly that?
Yeah.
Marc:It's fine.
Guest:No, I just love her so much.
Marc:Why doesn't she want to come on?
Marc:She just doesn't do these things.
Guest:No, she does.
Guest:She's done mine a few times.
Marc:Well, that's different.
Marc:You guys are best friends.
Marc:Why the hostility though?
Marc:Why the fuck off?
Marc:Does she say it comedically?
Guest:People are specifically intimidated by your podcast.
Marc:No, I agree with that.
Guest:You do?
Guest:Uh-huh.
Guest:Okay, why?
Marc:Certain people.
Guest:Why do you think?
Marc:Because I think like certainly with some actresses, like why would they?
Marc:Why would they sit and talk for an hour to fuel anything out there?
Marc:You had to stop yourself from talking about something.
Marc:You do a good job at diversion and being funny and stuff and wandering from the point for whatever reason.
Guest:So not staying on target.
Marc:So, but that is something I understand that actresses in particular have to be more protective of their shit.
Marc:And also, like, you know, a lot of them don't, like actors in general, a lot of them don't want to reveal, you know, what's behind their particular talent, which is fine.
Guest:But you're right, though, that it is, it can feel exposing to talk.
Right.
Marc:But what bothers me is I don't want, you know, actors or anybody thinking that I have a specific agenda or that I'm looking.
Marc:I'm certainly not out to sandbag anybody or make anybody look bad.
Marc:But I just think it's a general sort of apprehension of like the hour long interview.
Marc:Right.
Marc:That's too candid.
Guest:Well, and also, you know, as you know, we have people that we work with that get terrified of this kind of thing.
Guest:That somehow if I slip or say something that my, you know, whatever, that I'll get like raked over the coals.
Marc:But the weird thing is we would take it out.
Marc:Like if you drove away from here.
Marc:And had second thoughts about anything.
Marc:You know, you would tell me, I'd tell my producer and be like, okay, that doesn't go in.
Guest:Should I have second thoughts about something I said?
Marc:No.
Marc:I feel like you've said some of it before.
Guest:Oh, you listen to all my interviews.
Guest:Fuck you.
Marc:Or you just think I'm well-versed.
Marc:No, I just, I, you know.
Guest:Oh, fuck you.
Marc:I guarantee you, like, what would you think we'd need to take out?
Marc:Like, if you were really to think of anything that you said, there's not one fucking thing.
Guest:I think I skirted okay, but you were kind.
Marc:Skirted.
Marc:See, that's what you do.
Marc:That's your professional skirter.
Guest:Pivoter.
Guest:And truthfully, I wish that this could be a forum where I could...
Guest:It's like we're 80% there.
Guest:Me and you?
Guest:Or culture?
Guest:People?
Guest:I feel like I would love to be able to tell you all of my intimate thoughts about relationships and religion and kids and whatever.
Marc:Will you save that for your podcast?
Marc:Is this just a big promotional ploy?
Guest:But you know what I'm saying.
Guest:It's part of protecting the people around you.
Guest:And also why?
Marc:Why do it if you don't want to own it publicly?
Marc:What's the point?
Marc:There's no point to it.
Guest:See, that's where I kind of disagree, though.
Guest:All right.
Guest:Because I think there is a point.
Guest:I was watching Tiffany Haddish, whom I just adore.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And she was, like, talking about smoking weed and whatever, driving on Jimmy Kimmel.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I was like, good for her.
Guest:Uh-huh.
Guest:Like, that's something that I would never talk about because I would be terrified that, like, oh, there would be haters out there being like, oh, she's a mom or whatever.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:No, but like this is one of the issues.
Marc:So you are very aware because like there was a moment when we were just talking where you're like, you know, like you were about to say something and you said, I can't.
Marc:And you were talking to yourself.
Marc:Right.
Marc:So you've been at this long enough to know, you know, even pre clickbait that, you know, if you say something because of your public personality that, you know, it would just be a pain in the ass tomorrow.
Marc:Or whenever this airs.
Guest:Well, and also, you know, I took this, one of my most favorite acting jobs was this movie called Smiley Face where a small indie and I'm stoned the whole time.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I loved playing it because the dialogue was so funny and it was such a weird character.
Guest:Who wrote it?
Guest:Dylan Haggerty wrote it and Greg Araki directed it.
Guest:It was like a part written for a dude.
Guest:And that's what I loved about it.
Guest:It was sort of asexual or whatever.
Guest:But my mom, when I told her I was going to do a movie about this stoner girl, she was like, but I, you are a role model.
Guest:Which two things raced through my head, which was like, one, mom, did you see any of the scary movies?
Guest:Because I am not a role model.
Yeah.
Guest:And to like, so I had to tell her, I said, Mom, you know, I want to take roles that inspire me creatively.
Guest:And I don't want to be thinking about you.
Guest:And I love you.
Guest:And but I don't I can't have that a part of my decision making.
Guest:It's it's the sort of the search for a personal, intimate identity.
Guest:And then you're the public pressure to.
Guest:or whatever it is to have another persona or to be good or maintained or whatever it is.
Marc:Do you have that voice of your mother in your head anyways?
Guest:I try to let it go, but yeah, I do.
Marc:But you've done a lot of, I would say, sort of sexualized and provocative characters.
Guest:Yeah, and I like to make orgasm noises on my podcast a lot.
Marc:You do?
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Marc:But does your mother listen?
Guest:No, I told her not to.
Guest:And last year she told me I had a book that came out.
Guest:And she said, I'm going to give you a gift and not read your book.
Guest:I was like, thank you, mom.
Guest:Thank you so much.
Guest:Because there's a different expectation level, I think, for women, too.
Guest:They always wanted me to be a virgin forever.
Marc:Yeah, they did actively.
Guest:Which is odd for non-religious parents, I think.
Marc:Yeah, I'm trying to figure out what they were.
Marc:If they weren't religious, they were still sort of controlling, it sounds like.
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:But supportive.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Protective, you said.
Guest:Protective.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah, I mean, I understand all those pressures.
Marc:And it is, I guess, a tough place to be.
Marc:And I think that my experience with it is even the best at it, who I've talked to at managing their image,
Marc:Even when they pull it off, they will be pulled apart if they are popular enough for bullshit.
Guest:Well, that's the thing.
Guest:That's the struggle.
Guest:It's like full ownership.
Guest:Because now with social media, it's very transparent how a celebrity is perceived.
Yeah.
Guest:And it's easy to tell, I think, if there's a certain image, a simplistic image being projected.
Guest:Uh-huh.
Guest:And so... Because they'll hold you to that.
Guest:It's either like go big or go home a little bit.
Marc:Oh, right.
Guest:So either... But I'm still like maintaining the middle.
Marc:I'm sort of... Yeah, and they still come after you.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:For whatever you say.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:But why you?
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:I don't think I... I don't know.
Marc:And also you're in a celebrity relationship, which puts a lot of eyes on it.
Marc:You'll never get out from under that.
Guest:Well, yeah.
Marc:In the press, you know what I mean?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:In terms of their intrigue.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I did this... I'm really proud of this.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Because I never have a good comeback ever.
Guest:Um, but I did this podcast, uh, like, I don't know, maybe a year ago.
Guest:And, uh, and we played like some silly games, whatever, like we're fucking around and, and it's all light and I'm promoting a movie and blah, blah, blah.
Guest:And at the very end, uh,
Guest:The dude was like, so tell us about Jack.
Guest:How is Jack dealing with... That's your kid?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:He prefaced it by saying, I wouldn't be doing my job if I didn't ask.
Guest:And he has this big grin on his face.
Guest:And he's like, so how is Jack dealing with everything that's going on in your life?
Yeah.
Guest:And I said, you know, I was politically, which is the truth, actually.
Guest:It's the boring fucking truth, which is that everything is great.
Guest:And so I go on for a minute, but I'm flushed because I wasn't quite expecting for this light, goofy thing interview to suddenly pivot into that area.
Guest:So I said, okay, but now that we're done with that,
Guest:I wouldn't be doing my job if I didn't ask, how long do you go down on a woman for?
Guest:Because it should be at least 40 minutes.
Marc:Uh-huh.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:What did he say?
Guest:He couldn't talk.
Guest:He was like, ah...
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:You got him, huh?
Guest:I don't know.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:I don't know.
Guest:But it felt good, at least in that moment, to be like, okay, don't preface it by saying I got to be doing my job.
Guest:Like, I wouldn't be doing my job.
Guest:What the fuck?
Marc:Right.
Marc:Come on.
Marc:But so, like, the struggle is to sort of, you want to have a private life, but you'd like to own, I imagine you do own who you are in your private life and with your friends, but why do you, you know, why do you owe that to the public?
Right.
Guest:I think that, and this is where it's hard for me because I do like to escape behind characters, which is why I like to act.
Guest:So it is hard, the idea of the expectation of people feeling like they need all information.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Especially the bad shit.
Guest:Yeah, but at the same time, I do understand it because I do understand wanting to go to a movie or watching a show because of somebody that you root for.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Like personally, you know, I get that.
Guest:I get that completely because I'm the same way.
Guest:So it's really.
Marc:Well, that's it there is that, you know, because of the nature, like there's a lot of actresses.
Marc:that you know just live their lives but because somehow or another at a certain point because of your relationship or whatever you know you became one of these subjects you know like they're you know paparazzi and and the tabloids aren't following around every actress you know they're not you know there was just some you were one of the people
Guest:I always felt like I consistently made like stars without makeup.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:And there I am in sweats, you know, whatever, eating a burrito.
Marc:That's good.
Marc:You can handle that.
Guest:Sort of.
Guest:And then it's like, well, that sure doesn't look flattering.
Guest:But I don't know.
Guest:I think...
Guest:I don't want to portray myself in a false way.
Guest:Right.
Guest:Because I clearly don't have my shit together.
Guest:You have a lot of shit together.
Guest:I didn't shower today.
Guest:What the hell has that got to do with anything?
Guest:I don't know.
Guest:My hair feels kind of greasy.
Marc:You're showing up for work.
Marc:But you're showing up for work.
Marc:You do a network show.
Marc:That's a lot of fucking work.
Marc:You do the job.
Marc:You do a good job.
Marc:You're managing being a parent.
Marc:You have to co-parent.
Marc:I mean, these are things that you're showing up for.
Marc:I mean, you do have a certain amount of shit together.
Marc:I don't know why it is that the average, not average is the wrong person, but people who aren't in this business are
Marc:hold people in this business to a certain standard and they want to see them buckle somehow.
Marc:I mean, we all deal with the same problems that everyone else deals with.
Marc:But for some reason, you become an example just because of your fame.
Guest:Well, I think, you know, we're so lucky to have like a good, you know, good fortune in a lot of ways.
Guest:But not to continue to promote my podcast.
Guest:But that's been a wonderful thing, too, is realizing that so many of the questions that we get and the callers that we get are about the same issues.
Guest:Of course.
Guest:Which is like, does this person like me?
Guest:Am I attractive?
Guest:What am I doing with my career?
Guest:And these are things that, like, it's like the great unifier, at least in, I have to, it's so lame when I say this, but in developed nations, because...
Guest:It is like, yeah, there's people that actually have... Real problems.
Guest:Hunger issues.
Marc:Well, I think also what makes you appealing in your work, but also in terms of who you are, is like I said earlier, what happened to us...
Marc:when we first met is that you you you can't hide your vulnerability so like even in your acting and you know even how like and i think that that attracts both you know you know predatory bullying you know and but also a tremendous amount of
Marc:of empathy from other people and also relatability.
Marc:But if you can't hide your vulnerability, that means the monsters are gonna be like, oh, look at that, we got her.
Marc:But also most people are gonna be like, oh, she's like, I understand her, she's like me.
Guest:Thanks.
Guest:Thanks for saying that.
Guest:Because I don't want to live a life of high defense.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:I mean, I think I do to some degree.
Marc:But you've figured out how to be charming and diverting.
Marc:So that's great.
Marc:You're doing a great job with that.
Guest:Thanks, Mark.
Guest:Thank you for... Now you just laughed.
Guest:You're like, I'm full of shit.
Marc:I kind of said something funny.
Guest:You did, but I wasn't listening.
Guest:I was too busy absorbing the compliment.
Marc:So how long do you go down on a woman?
Marc:Because if it's less than 40 minutes, I don't think you're really doing your job.
Guest:I know.
Guest:You're completely right.
Guest:But I am a union member.
Marc:Oh, okay.
Guest:So you got to do it no matter what.
Guest:I got to take a lunch break after 30 minutes.
Yeah.
Marc:Nice talking to you, Anna.
Guest:Mark, thank you so much.
Guest:So which party favorite do I get to keep the hammer or the knife?
Marc:I'm going to give you a mug.
Marc:No, it's a handmade mug.
Marc:Fuck.
Marc:Oh, really?
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:All right.
Marc:By Potter.
Marc:All right.
Marc:He lives in upstate New York.
Guest:Really?
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:You give better gifts than I do.
Marc:I don't remember.
Marc:What did you give me?
Guest:Nothing.
Marc:Nothing.
Guest:A hug?
Marc:Okay.
Marc:All right.
Guest:Can I have the last word?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Thank you so much for inspiring me to start a podcast, which has now made my life slightly miserable, but wonderful.
Guest:I appreciate it.
Marc:You're welcome.
Marc:What?
Marc:I thought I got the last word.
Marc:I'm turning it off now.
Marc:Fuck you.
Fuck you.
Marc:Okay, so that was fun, right?
Marc:That was exciting.
Marc:Emotional dance, wasn't it?
Marc:As I said earlier, Anna Faris is on the show Mom, and it's back.
Marc:Thursday nights on CBS and her podcast Unqualified.
Marc:You can get wherever you get them.
Marc:The podcasts, whatnot.
Marc:Um, also go to WTF pod.com to get tour dates, buy one of the new t-shirts and sign up for WTF premium to listen to all WTF episodes commercial free.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:And I got those dynasty typewriter, uh, theaters coming up there here in LA, LA small theater, October 4th and October 6th.
Marc:You can go to WTF pod.com slash tour to, uh, to get tickies for that.
Marc:Okay, I guess I'll try to play guitar with my other fingers now.
Marc:Tall Wilkenfeld gave me a gift for my birthday.
Marc:This echo pedal.
Marc:I usually use pedals.
Marc:I think she's got her mind set on helping me build a pedal board for my limited skill set.
Marc:But let's see what we got.
Okay.
Guest:guitar solo
Marc:Boomer lives!