Episode 951 - Kristen Bell
Marc:Lock the gates!
Marc:Alright, let's do this.
Marc:How are you, what the fuckers?
Marc:What the fuck buddies?
Marc:What the fucksters?
Marc:What the fuck nicks?
Marc:What's happening?
Marc:I'm Mark Maron.
Marc:This is my podcast, WTF.
Marc:Welcome to it.
Marc:How's the weekend?
Marc:Okay, today I will be, I'm recording this the day before, but today I'll be at the Emmys because the show I'm in, or on, is it?
Marc:I'm in, GLOW, is nominated for Best Comedy.
Marc:Betty Gilpin for Best Supporting Actress.
Marc:So we're all going.
Marc:We're doing the thing.
Marc:I've never been.
Marc:And I don't... I'll let you know how it goes.
Marc:By the way, Kristen Bell is on the show today.
Marc:And we taped it a while ago.
Marc:Do we tape it?
Marc:Do we say tape?
Marc:Do we record?
Marc:We recorded a while ago, but...
Marc:She's evergreen and evervescent, so it'll be swell.
Marc:I'll tell you, it was kind of an interesting day.
Marc:I'll tell you about it before I introduce her.
Marc:So I'll be at the Emmys.
Marc:Last night, I went to a party, a Netflix Emmy party, a toast.
Marc:Ted Sarandos, the guy who runs things over Netflix, has all the nominees and shows over to his house, and they build some sort of...
Marc:Staging area for a party out in the backyard.
Marc:I went to it last year, but it's what always astounds me really about me is how continually starstruck I am and do not necessarily see myself as.
Marc:A full member of this community.
Marc:There's some part of me that still sees myself as I am a guy talking in his garage.
Marc:Granted, it's a new garage.
Marc:It's a nicer garage.
Marc:And I have to thank show business, but really the podcast for that.
Marc:uh for the most part and for all of it really if we track it all the way back but i you know i get to this party you know i'm dressed up i bought a suit not the black suit that i'll be wearing today at the emmys but the eggplanty purple suit that i got down at bloomingdale's men's department that's that's how i was schooled what am i gonna go pay a million dollars for two suits i go to bloomingdale's say what you got what's new and they go how about this um imperial armani get up
Marc:I can hook you up with the suit, the shirt, and the tie, and we'll just knock it out.
Marc:You stand over there, and we'll have the tailor come.
Marc:Wait, that's great.
Marc:That's great.
Marc:And it was seven minutes from my house.
Marc:Terrific.
Marc:No problem.
Marc:But I like the suit, but I got there, and the first thing I noticed, apparently that's the color this year, the sort of plum, eggplant-y, purple thing for fellas.
Marc:There were no less than five other guys not wearing the same suit, but a similar color suit.
Marc:I think I wore mine pretty well.
Marc:My pants are a little baggy now because of the diet I've been on, so I spent a lot of time hiking my pants up and tucking my shirt back in, but that keeps me grounded.
Marc:That and parking on the street.
Marc:Sarah and I drove in my car and got there a little early, kind of beat the rush of limos, and they said we couldn't go in yet, so we just parked on the street, and it was great.
Marc:You don't have to wait for your car for people.
Marc:These perhaps are luxury problems, but I'm trying to get you up to speed with my life at this particular juncture because many of you have been with me a long time.
Marc:So we were walking into the party, and who's walking down the street as well?
Marc:Who must have parked on the street?
Marc:Diane Keaton, Carol Kane.
Marc:Said hi to them.
Marc:I know Carol from Mike Birbiglia's movie.
Marc:She was very nice, was happy for my success, she said.
Marc:I'd never met Diane Keaton before.
Marc:I met her.
Marc:That was very exciting.
Marc:So I get into the party.
Marc:I get in the party, and it's just a swirl.
Marc:I see the Glow Girls, you know, Allison, Jackie's there, Betty comes, Liz and Carly show up, Sedell, Brittany, Britt.
Marc:I think there were, Kimmy, some of them, most of them were there.
Marc:But the point is, I was happy to see all of them, but then I'm wandering around, and then you start looking around, and you're like, holy fuck, there's Norman Lear.
Marc:I know Norman Lear.
Marc:Should I go say hi to Norman Lear?
Marc:Is Norman Lear going to remember me?
Marc:Of course he is.
Marc:You know, we spent a lot of time together.
Marc:We spent almost two hours.
Marc:Two hours together.
Marc:But I've seen him a couple other times.
Marc:So I held off on going up to Norman because I knew he'd be around.
Marc:And I just kept looking around.
Marc:And then I just start to, I can't keep focus because I get starstruck.
Marc:Jeffrey Wright.
Marc:Like I love that guy.
Marc:I think he's a genius actor.
Marc:And it took me a half hour of circling and wandering around before I could just step in and meet the guy.
Marc:And I didn't know what to say to him.
Marc:I was like, I love your work.
Marc:You're great.
Marc:And he's like, yeah, I like your energy.
Marc:I don't think he had any idea who I am, but that's all right.
Marc:But that's all I said.
Marc:That was a big deal, is to meet Jeffrey Wright.
Marc:And then there's other people there that I see, and I'm like, holy shit, that guy.
Marc:And I go meet them, and I feel like an idiot.
Marc:And I still have that element.
Marc:I was so nervous I couldn't even, you know, for an hour, I couldn't figure out a way to just walk up to Jodie Foster and introduce myself.
Marc:I just couldn't do it.
Marc:I did go up to one guy with the same suit as me and say, like, yeah, I think we should acknowledge that, you know, we're wearing the same suit.
Marc:He's like, oh, yeah, I guess so.
Marc:Mine's Prada.
Marc:What's yours?
Marc:I'm like, you know, it's a department store line, Bloomingdale's.
Marc:Yeah, that's who I am.
Marc:The guy who walks up the driveway and wears his Bloomingdale suit met Tina Fey for the first time.
Marc:For the first time.
Marc:And that took me 10 minutes.
Marc:Nick Kroll had a, like, you know, I had to say, are you going to introduce me to Tina Fey?
Marc:Like, I'm just a guy off the street, which I was.
Marc:I walked up the driveway in my uncomfortable shoes.
Marc:But, you know, I'm not calling myself some sort of working class hero or anything.
Marc:But the point being...
Marc:I asked face-to-face, face-to-face.
Marc:I said, Diane Keaton, will you come on my show?
Marc:She said, no, what am I going to talk about?
Marc:Fine.
Marc:Tina Fey, can we interview you?
Marc:Can I interview you?
Marc:I'm around, but we tried to get her before, so I don't know.
Marc:Hannah Gadsby, I saw.
Marc:This is the second time I met her.
Marc:And I said, I'd really love to have you on my show.
Marc:And I gave her my number.
Marc:She didn't know her new phone number.
Marc:But I don't know.
Marc:Maybe whatever.
Marc:She wrote down my number in a book.
Marc:And she was with Jill Soloway, who's been on the show.
Marc:So I'm going to try to.
Marc:I try, folks.
Marc:And I'm wandering around.
Marc:And I can't help myself.
Marc:I literally say that almost immediately.
Marc:Will you come over to my house and let's do the podcast?
Marc:It's the first thing I think to say before saying hi sometimes.
Marc:So we'll see what happens.
Marc:We'll see if Tina Fey happens, if Hannah Gatsby happens, if I don't think Diane Keaton's gonna happen.
Marc:I should ask Carol Kane.
Marc:What kind of fucking rude bastard am I?
Marc:Carol Kane's great.
Marc:She's hilarious.
Marc:She reminds me of family.
Marc:But so I wandered around, did not talk to Jodie Foster as we established.
Marc:But then when I finally saw Jason Mantzoukas and Nick Kroll were standing there during the toast, Leslie Jones was there.
Marc:She dropped her drink and I walked up and I said, I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
Marc:And she didn't know who, like she turned before she saw who it was.
Marc:And she like it was going to be a problem.
Marc:But then she saw me and laughed her head off because it was a funny moment.
Marc:I saw Jason and Nick hung out with them a bit, had some laughs.
Marc:And I'll tell you.
Marc:Lorne Michaels was there because he's producing the Emmys today.
Marc:And I'm like, fuck it.
Marc:I'm gonna go say hi to my buddy Lorne.
Marc:Gonna go walk up to Lorne like we're pals.
Marc:So that's the other thing.
Marc:I assume a familiarity sometimes that...
Marc:I bring a lifetime of fandom to certain things or obsession or whatever it is.
Marc:Like I interviewed Michael Douglas in here the other day.
Marc:It'll be on soon.
Marc:But literally day before yesterday.
Marc:So there's a day after I interview Michael Douglas.
Marc:I see him at this party and I'm like, there's my buddy Michael Douglas.
Marc:I'm just going to go say hi to Michael Douglas because we're pals.
Marc:I walk up to him.
Marc:I'm like, Michael Douglas.
Marc:He looks at me.
Marc:He goes, wow, you know, all the good parties, you know, all the good places.
Marc:He doesn't know me.
Marc:I was the guy who interviewed him.
Marc:And I'm like, but we just had a long conversation.
Marc:I know a lot about you.
Marc:Can we just hang out?
Marc:I didn't say that.
Marc:I said, okay, man, cool.
Marc:Good seeing you.
Marc:Yeah, it went good.
Marc:But Lorne Michaels was there.
Marc:I did feel more familiar with that.
Marc:And I walked up to him.
Marc:I said, Lorne.
Marc:He's like, hello.
Marc:How are you?
Marc:And I'm like, fine.
Marc:I said, you're producing this thing?
Marc:He goes, yep.
Marc:I'm like, is the show together yet?
Marc:No.
Marc:And it was two days before.
Marc:But it's going to be good, right?
Marc:Have you ever done it before?
Marc:He said, 30 years ago.
Marc:And I'm like, oh.
Marc:I said, is there going to be dancing?
Marc:Yes, there'll be a little dancing.
Marc:And we both laughed.
Marc:And I walked away.
Marc:I felt like that was the end of the conversation.
Marc:Gave me a little pat on the back.
Marc:And somehow or another, that was a tremendous success in my fucking little life.
Marc:But so I guess that's what I'm reporting.
Marc:Too nervous to introduce myself to Jodie Foster.
Marc:Assume too much familiarity with Michael Douglas.
Marc:Nervously met Jeffrey Wright.
Marc:Right to like out of the gate, ask Diane Keaton, Tina Fey, and Hannah Gadsby to do the podcast.
Marc:And had some good laughs with Manzoukas and Kroll.
Marc:Saw all the Globe people.
Marc:And some fans were there, you know, from other areas of show business.
Marc:Did talk to Norman Lear for a bit.
Marc:Had some laughs.
Marc:And then Sarah and I got out.
Marc:We got out.
Marc:Got out.
Marc:Got home.
Marc:Took the shoes off.
Marc:Ate a healthy dinner.
Marc:Yep.
Marc:That's the life.
Marc:Another thing that I noticed anyways about going to these events is that there's no doubt, I imagine, I don't think there is, and I assume that the people who listen or know me or whatever who have been with me throughout this journey, there's no doubt that this is my time.
Marc:Whatever that means, this is it.
Marc:This is my window of opportunity.
Marc:This is when I get to do the work that I've worked so hard on.
Marc:All my life to get to in the last few years.
Marc:Anyways, I think a lot of you have noticed that.
Marc:But but the other thing I realized when I go to these events like this Emmy party is that my generation, most of those people have had their breaks and they've they've had their careers in a way.
Marc:I mean, many of them are still working one way or the other, but they had their time.
Marc:They, you know, there's an arc to it generally.
Marc:It's nice if everybody works steadily.
Marc:And many of them are, you know, made their money or have found their place in the business.
Marc:And they're established, I guess, is what I'm trying to say.
Marc:Most of the people that I started out with, I mean, you know, Dave Cross, Janine Garofalo, Caroline Ray, you know, Dave Attell, you know, Louis, Jon Stewart, just that generation of,
Marc:of people that were my peers must have been enjoying these parties, you know, a decade or more ago.
Marc:It's a very odd thing that I noticed it, that like a lot of the cats that I know from, that I see around that are doing work now, like I mentioned Nick Kroll and Mantzoukas, they're at least 10 years younger than me.
Marc:At least.
Marc:And I just was looking around.
Marc:There's no one from my crew because I had to watch them become famous.
Marc:But it was just I did not graduate with my class, I guess is my point.
Marc:I spent a lot more years in undergrad or something, but but I just noticed it that I consider myself peers and equal, you know, because I had such great laughs with Jason and and Nick.
Marc:I just I love seeing him and I just and I don't think about it ever, but I'm like an old man for fuck's sake.
Marc:You know, it's not a lonely feeling.
Marc:It's just something I noticed.
Marc:My time is now, but most of the people that I started out with, their time was at least 10 years ago.
Marc:At least.
Marc:Wow.
Marc:It was kind of an interesting realization.
Marc:I'm like, here comes our funny uncle.
Marc:He's dad's friend, right?
Marc:Man.
Man.
Marc:Yes, people, Kristen Bell, the lovely, charming, funny, talented Kristen Bell.
Marc:She exudes charisma.
Marc:But it was wild because she was coming over here, and at that time, me and Dax, I sense there was a, you know, we worked it out.
Marc:There was that issue with Dax and I did his podcast and Chris and I had to get Kristen.
Marc:We made an agreement.
Marc:We bartered.
Marc:He said he would get Kristen to do it.
Marc:I don't know if that was the reason she did.
Marc:But when she came over, she got here early because she had to do a call.
Marc:I don't remember exactly what it was now, but I do remember it was that she just came over.
Marc:She had to do a Skype meeting and I was like, sure, you can do it here.
Marc:And she was starving.
Marc:And I was like, well, I have some leftovers.
Marc:I have some kale and some tofu and maybe some quinoa or brown rice or stuff.
Marc:Is that good?
Marc:She's like, yeah, that's exactly what I eat.
Marc:And all of a sudden it felt, I swear to you, and this is not in an inappropriate way, no disrespect to Dax, but for about an hour, it felt like Kristen and I were living together and we had been for a long time.
Marc:it was just like i don't know if it's a lack of boundaries or just a comfort level or just who she is and who i am but i was like all right yeah let me make you some lunch and you know do what you got to do i'll just go in the other room and take care of my stuff you do your meeting uh you know and i'll go uh out on the porch and then you know i'll feed you some uh kale and stuff and then we'll go out in the garage and talk there was just a comfort element to it that was a bit wild we talked about our days
Marc:This is before we even got on the mics.
Marc:And I'm like, oh my God, are we best friends?
Marc:Haven't talked to her since.
Marc:Have not talked to her since that day.
Marc:But it was a fun day, and I did notice the comfort of it.
Marc:Again, it's not inappropriate.
Marc:I feel like we must be friends from centuries ago.
Marc:But it worked out.
Marc:I'm glad I had what she wanted to eat for lunch.
Marc:So this is Kristen Bell and myself after we have eaten leftovers, and she's had a video meeting, and we've hung around the house a little bit, and we just came out here.
Marc:All very pleasant, very comfortable.
Marc:Her show, The Good Place, returns for season three with a special one-hour premiere on Thursday, September 27th.
Marc:You know what day that is as well?
Marc:My birthday.
Marc:It's my birthday.
Marc:You can catch up on seasons one and two right now of The Good Place.
Marc:That's on Netflix where everything good is.
Marc:Right.
Marc:Glow.
Marc:Right.
Marc:Easy.
Marc:Right.
Marc:But this is a very lovely chat.
Marc:It was a special day in my mind.
Marc:Yes, it was.
Marc:Me and Kristen Bell talking to each other for you to enjoy now.
Marc:Now.
Marc:What is that?
Marc:What are you thinking about chewing gum during the podcast on the mic?
Marc:Is that your plan?
Guest:Are you my dad?
Marc:Huh.
Guest:I'm going to be chewing a Nicorette because I just ate and it's delicious.
Marc:Is that Nicorette?
Marc:Yes.
Marc:Really?
Guest:It's a... Yeah, it's a mint.
Guest:It's a mint, but it's not commit.
Guest:You know, they have commits here.
Guest:These are the ones because my husband's real picky and the commits give him gas.
Guest:These are the ones from Canada.
Guest:They're called Thrive and they don't give you gas.
Marc:The gum gives him gas?
Guest:The gum gives him gas, but also the commit lozenges.
Guest:Something about the bonding agent gives him the toots.
Marc:Right, you know what it is?
Marc:It's the same stuff that was in Blow.
Marc:It's like one of the mannitol, sorbitols, one of the tols that they used to cut coke with, which is why you'd like, you know, get the toots, the blow toots.
Guest:I don't know, I've never done coke.
Marc:Oh, come on.
Marc:It could just open up already.
Guest:I'm being dead serious.
Marc:I can't.
Marc:You know, if we're going to play this game,
Guest:You know what the unfortunate part is?
Guest:I have one of those face... I feel like I would maybe want to do it once before I die, but I have that kind of a face and personality that if I'm at a party, no one brings it out.
Guest:They're like, oh, don't bring that around, Krista.
Guest:She's too nice?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:You would just bounce off the walls.
Marc:It would be insane.
Guest:Dax tells me that I would love it.
Guest:Just like...
Guest:He really wants to have... I've never done ecstasy either.
Guest:I think I might have done it once.
Marc:This doesn't sound like sober conversations at the Shepard Bell household.
Guest:Well, no.
Guest:We talk very openly about drugs and alcohol, even though no one participates.
Marc:But this sounds like maybe we should just once...
Guest:Well, no, he wants to... All of our friends are kind of straight edge, sort of goody-goody.
Guest:I mean, they have wine and beer and whiskey, but he wants to have an ecstasy party with all of our friends.
Guest:He wants to have everyone get an overnight babysitter that we trust, put all the kids together, then come to our house, check your keys, and then have one of his buddies there and just give everybody really good ecstasy and just have us all braid each other's hair or something.
Marc:Yeah, but who knows where that'll go?
Marc:I mean, hair braiding seems like the least of it.
Guest:Well, look, he loves everything to have more passion.
Guest:So who knows where it'll go?
Guest:Maybe we'll all hook up.
Guest:I doubt it.
Marc:And then it'll become a weekly thing.
Marc:No, no, that's the thing.
Marc:Losing jobs.
Guest:No, we're all very, none of us are really, other than Dax, none of us are interested in drugs, but he just feels you shouldn't leave earth without trying ecstasy or mushrooms.
Guest:I think I might have done ecstasy once.
Guest:When I was in college, I went to a Dave Matthews Band concert and my friends had it, but I'm like 90% sure it was a Tic Tac.
Marc:Oh, there's a couple issues I have with that story.
Marc:Oh, tell me.
Yeah.
Guest:I'd love to hear.
Guest:I was just about to say, do you take issue with anything I've said so far?
Marc:Sure.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:The Dave Matthews band.
Marc:Is that a thing that you enjoy or is that just a passing phase?
Guest:It was a phase for everyone.
Guest:I mean, it was in 1998.
Guest:You missed it.
Marc:I'm 54.
Marc:I think I somehow just didn't give a shit.
Marc:It was an age thing.
Guest:Well, it was a real sexy thing when I was in high school and college.
Guest:And it was like, in college, it was like starting to become nostalgia.
Guest:Like, oh, in high school, I love this band.
Guest:Oh, yeah?
Guest:It's also, you know, he's a great musician.
Marc:But that's what everyone says, yeah.
Marc:But I just don't lock in with the music.
Marc:I do a whole bit about it.
Marc:That's fine.
Marc:You know, I publicly.
Guest:I'm sure it's a great bit.
Marc:It's okay.
Marc:I mean, I just publicly say I don't like Dave Matthews and I don't understand why anyone likes him.
Marc:And I'm not asking you to explain.
Guest:I don't know if I could.
Marc:But in high school, what is it like you go and it's a thing and everyone jigs around and dances and it's an all day stadium experience.
Guest:Yeah, it's a bit reductive, I think, in the way you're explaining it.
Guest:The tone?
Guest:Yeah, you're reducing the experience a little bit.
Guest:But, you know, in high school, he was played on the radio a lot.
Guest:And in high school, you're escaping.
Marc:I can't name one of the songs.
Guest:Crash Into You.
Guest:Okay.
Marc:All right.
Marc:All right.
Guest:You're escaping from your parents and you're getting your first car and what's on the radio feels significant in an independent way to you.
Guest:And then you carry that through to college.
Guest:So when he came to play Madison Square Garden, you know I ate that Tic Tac and went to Dave Matthews.
Marc:Yeah, but you didn't feel anything.
Marc:You spent a lot of time going like, is it working?
Guest:Well, I couldn't tell if it was just that I was enjoying a Dave Matthews band concert.
Guest:But I also have a...
Guest:terrible memory i can't stress this enough so i could have experienced ecstasy on that that's what dax says but i'm like but i did like someone told me take a shower and i took a shower and it was a nice shower maybe that was it you're not talking about it in the right tone if it was real because you would have been like that shower i mean i can't explain it
Marc:But it was like I felt the water all over.
Guest:But I would have to remember that experience in order to describe it.
Marc:It would be unforgettable.
Guest:But that's how I feel like a lot of things in my life are.
Guest:We've had vacations, full vacations, Dax and I have taken, where I don't remember.
Guest:Really?
Guest:He's like, oh, yeah, we went to that ski place.
Guest:And I'm like, did we?
Guest:And he pulls up pictures on his phone.
Guest:And I have genuinely no connection to it.
Marc:Why do you think that is?
Guest:Wow, I have no, I have not figured it out yet.
Guest:I have worried at times that maybe something is broken in my brain.
Guest:And I'm like, do I have early onset Alzheimer's?
Guest:But then it was explained to me that someone with early onset Alzheimer's, when they go to the mall, a normal person forgets where they parked their car.
Guest:An onset Alzheimer's person forgets that they came to the mall.
Guest:So I don't think I have that, but I don't know.
Guest:Do you work too hard?
Guest:I work very hard, yeah.
Marc:Do you work too much?
Marc:because that's what I like I think I can't remember because I'm operating at such a speed I got so many things going and then when I do relax it just gets lost I mean like I don't like I can't remember stuff because that part of my brain is always filled you're on to something there I don't feel like I work
Guest:in the dictionary definition of it because I do have a lot of my fingers in a lot of projects and I have a lot of work, but I also am very territorial about my family time with my kids, but I also work hard like a mom who's always covered in urine and avocado when I'm at home.
Guest:So yeah, I think it's that I have too much, too many things.
Guest:And also, you know, we're supposed to be living in groups of like 115 people and that's how many names you can remember and that's how many, like tribally, that's what your brain is...
Guest:is capable that's a real number yeah i heard it mpr yeah yeah we're supposed to be living in groups of yeah and in that this is so interesting because in that scenario yeah someone in in in the 115 is going to be the best bike rider the best baker the best mother and the rest of us just have to accept that no we're all gonna have a best god open up to some optimism we're all gonna have something that's the best so everyone's the best at something but
Guest:In those groups.
Guest:But now that we're all connected and there's billions of people we see on the internet, we have no, we can't do anything but compare ourselves and go like, well, I'm not the best bike rider.
Guest:What's the man who does drugs and rides a bike really well?
Marc:Armstrong?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:He's the best bike rider.
Marc:Yeah, but in these groups of 115, I would assume that within each tribe they have their team, and then you start competing with other representatives of 115.
Guest:Sure, that's a very male thing to say.
Guest:Of course there's competition within there.
Marc:No, but I'm saying why would it be bad to... Why would you judge yourself against Lance Armstrong?
Yeah.
Guest:Well, that's what I'm saying is our brains aren't actually capable of it.
Guest:Our groups are too big now.
Guest:It's why I can't remember anyone's name and I just smile and say nice to see you.
Guest:You always have to say nice to see you instead of nice to meet you.
Marc:Ted Danson has a weird laugh he does.
Guest:Ted Danson is the best person I know.
Marc:I know.
Marc:He tells me about when he doesn't know people and they come up to me.
Guest:He's like... He's got so many cute little things like that.
Marc:That's right.
Marc:You work with him all the time.
Marc:I do.
Marc:But wait, now I think we got away from something.
Marc:And I think it was like... Okay, so your husband is sort of quietly...
Marc:Campaigning to do ecstasy with your friends.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:He doesn't want to do ecstasy.
Guest:He wants us to experience ecstasy.
Marc:So he's going to be like the... The teacher.
Marc:Right, the guide.
Guest:Yeah, the guide.
Marc:The sober guide.
Guest:To make sure everybody feels safe and comfortable and no one has a problem, but he feels that you shouldn't leave earth without having tried mushrooms or ecstasy.
Guest:And he can say that as a completely sober individual because, I mean, I don't know about you, but...
Guest:Like, he doesn't have a problem with anyone else partaking in anything, provided that within reason that they're not acting like a complete schmuck.
Guest:But he's fine if people do things.
Guest:He likes drugs and alcohol.
Guest:He just is aware that he lost his privilege with them because he can't handle it.
Guest:His brain does not have the chemistry to handle it.
Marc:Yeah, and it's also, right, I understand that.
Marc:I feel the same way.
Marc:If someone wants to smoke around me, fine.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I do not indulge drunk people well anymore.
Marc:I can't.
Guest:Uh-uh.
Guest:I'm not sober and I would agree.
Guest:Drunk people.
Marc:Just can't take it.
Guest:It's just annoying.
Guest:Well, when you're in a different reality than someone else, particularly if you're in a partnership where like someone's drunk and the other person's sober, you're now experiencing two different realities.
Marc:Right.
Marc:That's true.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Although, but I like my vape pen quite a bit and I smoke around my husband and it doesn't seem to bother him.
Marc:Nicotine vape or weed?
Guest:No, weed.
Guest:Oh yeah?
Marc:It doesn't bother him?
Guest:Not at all.
Marc:How much do you, so like, well, but like I used to love weed.
Guest:Oh, yeah, weed rules.
Guest:I know.
Guest:Weed's my drug of choice, for sure.
Marc:But for me, it just got to... If I was smoking weed, it's so easy.
Marc:So why not just do it a few times a day?
Guest:Well, but see, that's the difference between you and me.
Guest:I'm not an addict, so I don't ever think... I'll do this five times a day.
Marc:What do you mean?
Marc:You mean you don't do it when you wake up?
Guest:No, I don't.
Guest:I don't ever... Well, first of all... What's the point, then?
Marc:If you're...
Guest:Listen, I live with one of you.
Guest:I know.
Guest:I know your reasoning.
Guest:I don't have the same reasoning.
Guest:I can't do it around my kids, which is a phenomenal amount of hours each week.
Guest:And then, you know.
Marc:So like at night when you just.
Guest:Yeah, like once a week if I'm just exhausted and we're about to sit down and watch 60 minutes.
Guest:Why not?
Marc:Do a little vape.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Once a week.
Guest:Sure.
Marc:Before 60 minutes.
Guest:Don't judge me, Maren.
Guest:Don't judge my life.
Guest:I have a wonderful life.
Marc:I'm not saying anything about your life.
Guest:You're laughing at me.
Marc:If I was going to vape once a week before something, I'm not sure it would be 60 minutes.
Marc:That was the only judgment there.
Guest:Okay, I guess.
Guest:But the other shows, like, I really, really want to pay attention to.
Guest:Like, I'm not going to do it when I'm watching Game of Thrones.
Guest:I'll freak out.
Marc:Right.
Guest:Or Peaky Blinders.
Marc:But the news and interviews that are relevant to our culture.
Guest:Sometimes it makes, you know, everybody a little bit more interesting.
Marc:A spoonful of sugar make the medicine go down better.
Marc:Right?
Guest:That's that.
Marc:But, okay, so let's talk about it.
Marc:I'm happy we're doing this, aren't you?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Because you came over.
Marc:You were hungry.
Marc:I made you lunch.
Guest:You made me an excellent lunch.
Marc:It was so funny because I get that text from you.
Marc:You're like, all right, I'm on my way to your house.
Marc:I'm starving.
Marc:I'm like, what does that mean?
Guest:It means I'm on my way and I'm starving.
Guest:What else could it mean?
Marc:But no, in my brain, it was sort of like, are we going to lunch?
Marc:Am I making lunch?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:and what am i how am i supposed to handle i guess i was waiting to see how our friendship unfolds what would you do with that information if you well i said uh i don't have food here because i'm going out of town then i look in the refrigerator and and i said i'll go to trader joe's and then then i look in the refrigerator and i had tofu left over and steamed kale and cauliflower and i said i have all this stuff and i'll make and then i put some quinoa on and then and it was a delicious lunch and i went to trader joe's and i got you avocado
Guest:And can I tell you, I'm quite impressed because I didn't know if you would take that seriously and just maybe hand me a bag of almonds like I had expected that.
Guest:And I could have gotten through that.
Guest:But you really impressed me because when I came in, you had a nice place setting.
Guest:You had some tofu.
Guest:They were all in organized containers.
Guest:You had some steamed avocados and kale.
Guest:You gave me some Briggs.
Marc:Steamed cauliflower.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:It was delicious.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:It was a first time and hopefully not the last that you make me lunch.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:It was.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And then you were washing dishes and we were just talking.
Marc:It's like we live together for an hour.
Guest:It's great.
Guest:I love that.
Guest:I love us.
Marc:I do, too.
Marc:It's so exciting.
Marc:But but let's let's go back to like where do you come from?
Guest:Detroit.
Marc:Really?
Guest:It took me a minute.
Guest:Yeah, Detroit.
Marc:But like outside of Detroit, in Detroit?
Guest:Two miles north of Detroit.
Guest:Well, 8 Mile.
Guest:Everyone can reference 8 Mile now because of the movie.
Guest:I grew up on 10 Mile.
Marc:On 10 Mile.
Guest:Yeah, so not where there were prostitutes on the street or gunfire, but the sort of just north suburb of.
Marc:And so when you were like in high school, would you drive into where the badness was?
Marc:Sometimes.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:To do what?
Marc:Were there clubs?
Guest:Just look.
Guest:No, I never really clubbed a lot.
Guest:I did a lot of musical theater, so I wasn't too cool.
Marc:How big of a family?
Guest:Well, my parents got divorced.
Guest:They were married for seven years.
Guest:Then they got divorced when I was six months, maybe.
Guest:I think that was a bit of an afterthought.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And then I'm sure they were planning their divorce before I came along.
Guest:And then my father married my stepmom who had two older sisters.
Guest:So from a year on, I knew them as my sisters.
Guest:So they are my sisters, although I have my dad's family with two sisters.
Guest:And then my mom, who is remarried now and has other stepchildren that I don't really know.
Marc:Your dad's new wife had two sisters or she had two daughters?
Yeah.
Guest:My dad's new wife brought two sisters in, so we're not blood related.
Guest:Oh, but they're like your aunts.
Guest:We had two daughters.
Marc:Two daughters.
Guest:Sorry.
Marc:That's okay.
Guest:It's confusing.
Marc:So you've got a bunch of step sibs.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:And you're the only one of your parents' kids?
Guest:Correct.
Marc:Huh.
Marc:And everybody, so you were so young when they were divorced that you didn't have to, there was none of that emotional upheaval?
Guest:Never knew them together.
Marc:Couldn't imagine them together.
Marc:So you just had a lot of family around you.
Guest:Yes, and it's weird because talking about coming from a broken home, I never felt like that because I never had the non-broken home to compare it to, but my parents never said a bad word about the other, ever, to this day, have not.
Guest:um and i just looked at it like more people that loved me i just had a plus it was kind of great to be honest it was fucking great in high school because i if i was at my dad's and my sisters were annoying or i was upset with my parents then i would just get my car and drive to my mom's and then when i was sick of my mom i'd drive to my dad's because they never enforced they had like a court shared custody but they never ever enforced it they always let me choose where i wanted to be
Marc:So how old were you when everyone got remarried?
Marc:Was that you or me?
Marc:Was that my phone?
Guest:I think it's yours.
Guest:I don't have a ringer on it.
Marc:Oh, sorry.
Guest:Because I work a lot and I'm very professional.
Marc:But that seemed to go kind of saddening a little bit, no?
Guest:Does it?
Guest:Passive-aggressive?
Guest:No.
Marc:That was an interesting time.
Marc:How often does that happen?
Guest:Often.
Guest:Often.
Guest:Be prepared to get stung.
Marc:And you don't feel it for a second.
Marc:You're like, oh, wait, what just happened?
Marc:She's a bitch.
Marc:That was smooth.
Guest:Went right in.
Marc:Just trying to keep you on your toes.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:When did everyone get remarried, though?
Guest:My dad got remarried, I guess, about within a year and a half.
Guest:And then my mom got remarried and was married for, my mom's on her fourth marriage.
Guest:Fourth or fifth?
Guest:Fourth, I think.
Wow.
Guest:She got remarried and was married for five years and then had a long relationship for three.
Guest:They never got married and then got married again for six years and then now is married again.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Would it be wrong for me to assume that she might have been the one that wanted the divorce originally?
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Well, I don't know.
Guest:Look, you know, people grow and people have a lot of different issues, you know?
Marc:Sure, that is very diplomatic.
Guest:Yeah, it has to be.
Guest:It's my mom.
Marc:And you guys got along all right?
Guest:Yeah, we have had a lot of turbulence in the past because we're very, very different people in the way that we see the world, but we're very similar in the way we handle things, and that is an explosive combination.
Marc:Really?
Marc:So like just general sort of understanding of things, like what's the difference in worldview?
Guest:Well, she's very religious and I'm not.
Guest:Which one?
Guest:Which kind of religion?
Guest:Christianity, born again Christian.
Guest:And I think she is, it's hard for her to digest.
Guest:And we don't, I don't really like to talk about it a lot because when I'm talking about it, all I'm feeling about is that I'm disappointing my mother, which is an awful feeling.
Guest:So I'm like, let's just not talk about it.
Guest:Also, you know, she lives in Michigan and there's a different bubble out there than there is in California.
Guest:I'm a lot more open about very taboo subjects.
Marc:To her or in general.
Guest:In general.
Guest:And I think that is just different to her.
Marc:When did she become born again?
Guest:I mean, I guess, I think it's born again.
Guest:I don't really know.
Marc:Was there a conversion kind of thing?
Marc:Like, she found Jesus again?
Guest:Yes, kind of.
Guest:We were, like, I guess, Presbyterian.
Guest:I always went to, like, a Presbyterian Saturday camp when I was growing up in Royal Oak, Michigan, and then...
Guest:When I was in high school, I was sent to a Catholic high school because the public high school I would have gone to had a lot of drugs at the time, and she was very nervous about that.
Guest:So she sent me to a Catholic high school.
Guest:But that's not like a – you don't like –
Guest:leave there like a devout Catholic.
Marc:No, my brother went to Catholic, actually.
Guest:He's a Jew.
Guest:Yeah, it's like whatever.
Guest:You just have to wear a uniform.
Guest:But she really sort of found her love of Jesus through, I think, when I was in high school.
Guest:And when I left, she was always a little worried about me in New York.
Guest:And just, you know, things come later to certain people of certain religions.
Guest:The idea of gay being okay and all these things come at a slower pace.
Guest:Right.
Guest:And it has come for her.
Guest:If at all.
Guest:Yeah, if at all.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:And she's cool now.
Guest:She's not crazy or prejudiced.
Guest:But there are still certain things we disagree on that I just prefer not to talk about.
Marc:With her?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:You know?
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Like why, like, you know, like not, um, you're gonna get me in so much trouble.
Guest:Like not, I think she was, I don't know this, but from my perspective, I believe she was upset that we didn't baptize our kids.
Guest:Oh.
Guest:But from my perspective, I was like, let me tell you something.
Guest:My child is not quote unquote going to heaven or having an afterlife based on the fact that some man pours water over her head.
Guest:That is not.
Marc:Good defense.
Marc:How'd that go over?
Guest:That.
Guest:Well, like I said, I don't really like to talk about it, but she accepted it.
Guest:It's just a different, it works well for her.
Guest:She loves Jesus.
Guest:She has a lot of pictures of Jesus in her house.
Guest:A lot of smiling ones.
Guest:She really likes it when he's smiling.
Marc:Does she have the wooden ones hanging around?
Guest:No, not like shrines.
Marc:No, because you don't do idle.
Marc:No crucifixes?
Guest:Yeah, sure.
Guest:A couple.
Guest:But also there was a Jews for Jesus thing she was really into for a while where she wore a Jewish star.
Marc:Oh, really?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I'm not here to laugh at my mom.
Marc:No, we're not laughing at her.
Marc:I'm definitely not laughing at her.
Marc:I just, I find it interesting.
Marc:See, because now there's like a range to it that, you know, that there's the fundamental Jesus thing, but there's some breathing room.
Marc:The juice for Jesus was around for a little while.
Marc:She took some of that.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:You know, she it's a guide in her life.
Guest:It is a guide.
Guest:It is a true north.
Guest:It's something that makes her feel very safe and very loved.
Guest:And it is an idea of a practiced behavior that that is good for her.
Guest:I don't I'm not in need of that same thing.
Guest:I feel like I have a pretty good barometer of, you know, being more of a humanist.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:A good barometer of good and bad and how my conduct should be towards other people.
Marc:Sure, yeah.
Marc:If it doesn't involve prejudice or exclusion or malignant judgment, I don't have any problem with it.
Guest:I'm also very... I've sort of invented my own true north of a religion that I have... There's two sides.
Guest:There's happiness and suffering.
Guest:And which one gets you closer to happiness?
Guest:For everyone.
Guest:So like in...
Marc:Which one what?
Guest:In a decision.
Guest:In any decision, what gets you closer to happiness?
Guest:So like in terms of our ecstasy party, you know, some people would say drugs are bad.
Guest:And to me, that's very closed minded because if you have a group of people that are all adults that just want to try ecstasy once and have like a fun night together, I feel like that's much more towards happiness than it is suffering.
Guest:So what's the problem?
Marc:Well, there's no problem.
Marc:For me, though, right away, I think, like, how many people are we talking here?
Marc:Like 10.
Marc:How tightly are some of them wrapped?
Marc:What if somebody reveals something or breaks down in a weird way or has an awkward experience?
Guest:That's why Dax would be there.
Marc:Sure, sure, to rein it in.
Guest:Also, most of us are married.
Marc:But how well do you all know each other?
Guest:Very well.
Guest:Well, we do.
Guest:We sleep at each other's houses a lot.
Guest:married couples uh-huh oh okay we sleep over our friends houses why are they close by or is it far away is it a driving thing it's a driving thing but it's also a kid thing you can't hang out till like midnight playing games and then you have to go home and worry about a sitter and like yeah and so we will go to our friends like ryan and amy's house with like another couple and we all bring our kids and between the six of us i think there's like 10 kids so
Guest:We just let them run around and ruin the house, and then we get into a corner and, you know, play Settlers of Catan or play some fun games.
Guest:Oh, that's nice.
Guest:Play Codenames.
Marc:Well, see, that sounds like pretty close to 115.
Marc:Like, I mean, just there, you're talking 2, 4, 6, 8, 2, 4, 6, and 10 kids.
Guest:Yeah, that's a lot.
Guest:But then we'll sleep there.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I highly recommend this for parents that feel like they've lost their social life.
Guest:We sleep over...
Guest:We all just grab a couch or a bedroom.
Guest:And then in the morning, we all wake up and make waffles and then go take the kids out for burgers or something.
Guest:And then we go home at like 6 p.m.
Guest:the next night.
Guest:And that's the whole weekend.
Marc:That's like a big slumber party.
Guest:It's fucking awesome.
Marc:Yeah, I like it.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:See that you're living your own life.
Marc:Now your dad, what's he do?
Guest:My dad is a news director.
Guest:Uh-huh.
Guest:He's still a news director in Sacramento right now.
Guest:Wow, Sacramento.
Guest:And he was very, I have a wonderful father.
Guest:He's very, I get my sense of humor from him.
Guest:He's very funny.
Guest:He was very present growing up.
Marc:He's on air talent now?
Marc:No.
Guest:Wow.
Guest:He used to be, he used to work in radio because he has one of those deep voices.
Guest:Sure.
Guest:He's a Tom Bill.
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:And he's worked at- Where was he on the radio?
Guest:WWJ in Detroit.
Marc:Would people know him?
Marc:Was he popular?
Guest:Yeah, he's a very popular news director because he was like the guy.
Guest:They have a short shelf life news directors because they'll be brought in to revamp a news station and then, you know, like make it look modern and get everything.
Guest:And then they'll go to another one.
Guest:He was like that guy.
Guest:So he's worked in St.
Guest:Louis and Austin and Phoenix and all over.
Marc:And that's what he still does.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:As known in the broadcast community, he's kind of a celebrity.
Marc:Do you talk to him about the state of media?
Guest:Yes, I do.
Guest:And sometimes when I find a really terrible article or some fake news, I send it to him and I say, this is your fault.
Marc:How does he respond to that?
Guest:Usually with some sort of comedy.
Guest:He's got a killer sense of humor.
Marc:That's great.
Marc:And he comes down here and hangs out with you guys?
Guest:Yeah, he was just here last weekend.
Marc:And Dax's parents are around here?
Marc:Or his sister is?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Dax's sister lives here.
Guest:His brother lives in Oregon.
Guest:His father died about five years ago.
Guest:And then his mother lives in Oregon as well.
Guest:And she is currently hospicing.
Guest:Is that a word?
Guest:His stepfather, which will be sort of any day now he's dying of prostate cancer.
Marc:Oh, my God.
Guest:It's a bummer.
Guest:I'm sorry.
Guest:I don't mean to be a downer, but it's just the truth.
Guest:But we're prepared as a family.
Guest:It's been years and coming.
Guest:I mean, really?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Two or three years.
Guest:He's been fighting it for a while.
Guest:He's been fighting it for a while.
Guest:We have all sort of made peace with it.
Guest:And we've talked to our kids about it.
Guest:And they know that Papa's going to die.
Guest:In fact, yet a couple of days ago in the car.
Marc:Is this the first one for them?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:A couple of days ago in the car, my oldest daughter said, will Delta and I be around when we bury Papa?
Guest:And I said, yeah, you guys will.
Guest:We'll go up to Oregon and we have what's called a funeral and there's a casket and sometimes they open it and you'll see Papa's body and he won't be in it, but he'll be, you know, we're very honest with them.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:And she said, okay, so we'll be there when you bury him.
Yeah.
Guest:do I need to bring my gardening stuff?
Guest:I have a shovel.
Guest:Where do we do it?
Guest:The side of the house?
Guest:And it was so practical.
Guest:And I was like, I was, I mean, I slammed on my brakes.
Guest:I was laughing so hard, but I was also so proud.
Marc:Like it was going to be a group thing.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:She was like, well, one of our own is going.
Guest:I guess we all participate.
Guest:Like her frontal lobe was firing about how to handle this.
Guest:And I thought that was so wonderful for a five-year-old.
Marc:Had nothing to do with loss necessarily, but just the practical.
Guest:And I'm sure that's a phase we just haven't experienced yet.
Marc:The task at hand.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:How do we get this body out of the house?
Marc:Do you see any part of you in that?
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:Big time.
Guest:Although I, again, like I grew up because it was more religious.
Guest:Like I was given.
Guest:Like a lot of different, not excuses, but different sort of fantasies about what happens after you die.
Guest:We really don't know.
Marc:So in that conversation, you're going, well, he's going to heaven.
Guest:Yeah, no, we haven't said that to them.
Marc:No, but that's what you would have gotten.
Guest:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Guest:And you'll see him again and all these things that I feel like as a parent in my life, what I want to give to my kids is really the science of it and the critical thinking of it.
Guest:So she asked before when she was four, she said, am I going to die?
Guest:And Dax and I both lost our breath for a minute.
Guest:And we were like, this is the moment.
Guest:This is the moment we start to spin the fantasy of something else.
Guest:Do we do it?
Guest:Or can we brave this water and just say, yeah, yeah, we all die.
Guest:That's what happens.
Guest:It won't be for 100 years.
Guest:You don't need to worry about it.
Guest:And we said that.
Guest:And she cried for about 10 seconds.
Guest:And then she went, where are my Paw Patrol toys?
Guest:And it was like not a thing.
Guest:And I think that's, you know, 100 years ago, we all lived.
Marc:That's exactly what everyone does with their death awareness.
Marc:Is it?
Marc:Yeah, on some level, you cry for a few minutes.
Marc:You're like, what else is my phone?
Guest:But I think that like, you know, 100 years ago, we lived in studio apartments together.
Guest:You saw, you know, your parents had sex in the bed next to you.
Guest:When grandma died, she was in the house.
Guest:We saw all these things.
Guest:And now they're taboo because we've separated them.
Guest:Don't talk about death.
Guest:Don't talk about sex.
Guest:I just don't think it's the healthiest way to live.
Guest:And I don't think it's the healthiest way.
Guest:to raise a child, I think giving them the tools to understand that certain things happen at a young age.
Guest:And we're not morbid about it.
Guest:I mean, we don't talk about death, but she asks, we tell her.
Marc:Yeah, I wonder, like, as you're telling it to me, and I don't have kids, I wonder what the, unless you really believe it, what is the point?
Marc:of generating their imagination like that.
Marc:Well, God is going to take care of you.
Marc:You're going to go to heaven.
Marc:You're going to see all your friends.
Guest:It's projection.
Guest:You don't want to disappoint your child because there's a part of your child that's a mini you and you want to make them feel safe at all times.
Guest:You don't ever want to have to tell them the whole cold, hard truth because you're scared.
Guest:No, that's what I'm saying.
Guest:They're so resilient.
Guest:Like they've asked about sex before and Dak says, well, there's a penis and there's a vagina and there's an ovum and there's a jaculate and they're like, can I have some juice?
Guest:You know, they're just off.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:of it they don't care great it's uninteresting that one will come back around i'm sure they're all gonna come back there's gonna be some re-explaining over the years fine sex is wonderful i want my kids to have sex i want them to have good healthy positive happy wild sex yeah wow that's a that's a lot i wish that for anybody yeah that's good yeah what when you started do when did you start doing um theater stuff acting stuff
Guest:When I was, well, I started singing when I was little, when I was, I don't know.
Guest:Can you still sing good?
Guest:11, uh-huh.
Marc:Can you still sing well?
Guest:I can still sing, yes.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Well, I did this little movie called Frozen where I sang.
Guest:That's a big movie.
Guest:Yeah, I guess.
Guest:I'm teasing you.
Guest:No, I liked singing from a very early age and I was always very petite.
Guest:I was too small to play sports or be any good at it.
Guest:And I started singing like opera stuff when I was like 13.
Marc:In Italian?
Guest:Yep.
Marc:Really?
Guest:Uh-huh.
Marc:Did you take classes or something?
Guest:I did.
Guest:And I competed in solo and ensemble competitions, which are these sort of national competitions that, you know, nerds do.
Marc:Like you were a soprano?
Mm-hmm.
Guest:And then I discovered musical theater and I loved it.
Guest:And I really liked the theater because all these misfits gathered together and participated in something that was bigger than them.
Guest:And it was fun.
Guest:And then I started doing like local commercials when I was in high school.
Guest:And then I applied early admission to go to NYU because I knew New York was the only place I wanted to be.
Guest:And then I went two years there, two and a half years and then left because I booked a Broadway show.
Marc:Like local commercials, was your dad in town then?
Marc:Was that through his connections?
Guest:No, he was not very supportive of it.
Guest:He wasn't not supportive, but he did not – how do I say it?
Guest:He never discouraged me, but he certainly didn't encourage me because he makes cutthroat decisions and looks at two new –
Guest:anchors and says well this one's prettier than the other i have to hire this one or this one's easy you know what i mean he didn't want that for your life he did not want that rejection level for my life so he sort of stayed out of it and he he heard me out and he supported me uh as much as he could while taking a sort of back seat to my it was really me because even my mom didn't drive it i drove that i was like i want to be in these commercials i want to act i want to tell stories i want to sing let me go to new york at 17.
Marc:And you won.
Marc:You did.
Guest:I did.
Marc:And you went to Tisch for a couple of years, but did you finish the whole program?
Guest:Uh-uh, uh-uh.
Marc:But you'd had enough?
Guest:Well, no, because I booked a Broadway show.
Marc:And then that's sort of like, how is that not better than class?
Guest:Well, that's what I thought.
Guest:I mean, look, would I love that degree?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:But, you know, I tried to get like a work study program while I was in it in the first show I booked.
Marc:What degree would it be?
Guest:I don't know.
Marc:Theater arts or?
Guest:Yeah, I would have had a BFA.
Guest:Yeah, a Bachelor in Fine Arts.
Marc:So you don't have that?
Guest:I do not, no, no.
Guest:I'm degree-less.
Marc:You can get it.
Guest:Well, one day, well, but yeah.
Marc:I'll give you an honorary one soon.
Guest:Well, I would like one, but unfortunately, one of the ways to earn it at NYU is like 70% of your grade or something is participation.
Guest:So I'd have to go back and, you know, pretend to be a tree with a bunch of 18-year-olds if I wanted to.
Guest:I'm not as interested in that anymore.
Yeah.
You could do it.
Guest:I mean, maybe I could.
Guest:I don't know.
Marc:You'd be a great tree.
Guest:You think so?
Guest:Oh, sure.
Guest:Thank you, Mark.
Marc:So what was the Broadway show?
Guest:The one I left for?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:The Adventures of Tom Sawyer.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:It was a short-lived musical by the Nederlanders at the Minskoff.
Guest:I don't know if you know what any of those words mean.
Marc:Those are people.
Yeah.
Guest:No, the Nederlanders is a production company.
Guest:The Minskoff is the biggest Broadway theater.
Guest:It has 3,500 seats.
Guest:They had high hopes for it.
Guest:Yes.
Marc:Families would come.
Guest:And they didn't really.
Guest:But nothing survives at that theater.
Guest:The show that replaced us was The Lion King, which is the only thing.
Guest:That theater's kind of cursed unless you have a really, really big IP.
Marc:So theater was the thing.
Guest:For me, yeah.
Marc:And that's really where you started.
Marc:Did you go on, you did more plays?
Guest:Uh-huh.
Guest:So I did a couple other plays in New York.
Marc:Which ones?
Guest:I did The Crucible with Liam Neeson and Laura Linney.
Guest:Oh, wow.
Guest:Pretty heavy.
Guest:I did Reefer Madness.
Guest:That's fun.
Guest:That was over 9-11.
Guest:That was a little rough.
Marc:Oh, you guys were doing it?
Guest:We were in tech on 9-11.
Guest:Yeah, we were all together.
Marc:And you didn't...
Marc:Stop the show?
Marc:I mean, it didn't get canceled?
Guest:It did not get canceled.
Guest:We ran for about two months to about five people in the audience.
Marc:And that was sort of a musical riff on the old movie?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:It was a musical version of the old movie.
Guest:Got it.
Guest:It was poking fun at people who were scared of marijuana.
Guest:And then I did a show at the Kennedy Center.
Guest:I did some regional at the Kennedy Center.
Guest:We did Sondheim and Rep, like repertory where you do six of his shows in a row.
Guest:And then I moved out to California.
Marc:Because?
Guest:I don't know, because I had nothing better to do, because I was doing theater.
Marc:You had representation.
Marc:You were doing well at theater.
Marc:And somebody said, you really should go do an audition for this.
Guest:Yeah, well, Andy Fickman, who directed Reefer Madness, and also directed this movie I was in called You Again, he was the one that said, you need to come out to Los Angeles.
Guest:And I'm very much a familial person.
Guest:I need my tribe around me.
Guest:And he said, if you come to, I said, I'm scared.
Guest:I don't know anyone out there.
Marc:Had you done any TV in New York?
Guest:I did a small role as Andy Richter's daughter in Pootie Tang.
Marc:Wow, in Louie's movie.
Guest:Yep.
Guest:He gave me my first job ever.
Guest:But it was like one scene.
Marc:That's the weirdest movie in the world.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:But the story of that movie is crazy.
Guest:Bizarre.
Marc:A lot of people were in that movie.
Guest:Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
Marc:Yeah, so that was your first film.
Guest:That was my first film.
Guest:And then Andy said, if you move out to L.A., we will be your family.
Guest:And because a lot of the people who did Reefer Madness, Christian Campbell, they were all from Los Angeles.
Guest:And they were.
Guest:And I moved out here with two of my girlfriends, Jennifer Carpenter, who I did the Crucible with, who was on Dexter forever.
Guest:And this girl, Arielle Ash, who I had gone to college with, who now has a big design firm in New York that's gorgeous called Ash Leandro.
Marc:Everyone did all right.
Guest:Everyone did.
Guest:Well, we were hungry.
Guest:Yeah, we were hungry girls.
Guest:We like shared an apartment.
Guest:We for a while we like because Ariel had had interned at SNL.
Guest:And so she was going to live at Chris Kattan's house while he wasn't there.
Guest:And so Jennifer and I just lived in the pool house at his house without telling him.
Guest:So the three of us were like in his house while he was doing SNL.
Guest:Right.
Guest:He never knew.
Guest:And then, yeah, we shared an apartment for a while and then we all just started getting jobs.
Guest:I came out here and did a show on Melrose called Snow, which was a musical comedy loosely based on flowers in the attic.
Guest:And then I did a David Mamet movie called Spartan.
Marc:And then I saw Kilmer.
Marc:I remember that movie.
Guest:I was the president's daughter.
Guest:Oh, and they like shaved my head and I got taken overseas and treated barbarically.
Marc:I got to remember.
Marc:I got to go watch that again.
Guest:No, you don't.
Guest:I mean, you can if you want.
Marc:Do you not feel good about the performance?
Guest:No, I feel great about it.
Guest:I'm just saying I'm not going to, you know, base.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:I'm kind of interested about it because I just interviewed Mamet.
Guest:Oh, you did?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Isn't he the best?
Yeah.
Marc:Yeah, I mean, he's definitely, he's got his way.
Guest:He's a savant.
Guest:I mean, he's a certifiable genius, but he's also eccentric because of it.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I love him.
Marc:Yeah, no, it was great talk, and I like the way he writes.
Marc:I didn't really get into his movies too much, because I did sort of take him to task about how he sees acting and how he teaches acting.
Guest:Mm-hmm.
Guest:It's incredibly specific.
Guest:But I don't like favor one.
Guest:I'm going to make myself puke up your beautiful lunch.
Guest:But I don't favor one acting technique over the other.
Guest:But I think they all have helpful ways to get you to be sincere on camera or on stage.
Marc:Which ones did you?
Marc:You thought it was helpful.
Marc:It's very practical.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:But I'm a very technical actor.
Marc:But you studied the Atlantic?
Guest:I studied his way.
Guest:Yeah, I studied Mamet.
Guest:And I wasn't in the Atlantic Theater Company in New York.
Guest:They have a section in NYU.
Guest:But, you know, there's Stella Adler, which is all imagination.
Guest:So you took classes there?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:At Strasburg?
Marc:At Stella Adler?
Yeah.
Guest:No, within NYU, they have pockets, yeah, in all of those places.
Guest:So it was through NYU.
Guest:But I was in a study group called CAP 21, which was primarily music-based, but they studied Stanislavski and Mamet and Adler and...
Marc:And they encourage you to just study all of it.
Guest:Yeah, and they say, pick what works for you.
Guest:I don't think there's one way to do it.
Guest:Some people don't know how to act at all, and they're fucking brilliant.
Guest:And you don't want to tell them how to act because they're already doing it, you know?
Marc:Well, what about, what if you really, but I believe that's true, you know, just from my own experience.
Marc:But also, there are some actors that, you know, challenge themselves in, you know, with characters that are, you know, far above and beyond anything that they could necessarily relate to.
Marc:And that takes a different level of craft.
Guest:Yeah, that's why you want a toolbox with all those tools.
Guest:Because maybe what David Mamet teaches, something more practical is going to work for you.
Guest:Maybe Meisner is.
Guest:Meisner is the one where you sit and you just say, hello, hello, hello.
Guest:And you repeat each other back and forth.
Guest:And then until you find something, maybe that's going to work.
Guest:Maybe Adler is going to work.
Guest:I think you just have to have a toolbox to know all of them and then pick what works first.
Marc:Because you can do serious and funny.
Guest:I can try.
Guest:Well, my first job ever...
Guest:out here was a guest star on The Shield.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Like at its height.
Marc:With chick lists?
Guest:Uh-huh.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:But I was a girl that was captured by a gang and then raped and then tattooed on the face.
Ugh.
Guest:It wasn't as funny as it sounds.
Marc:It's hilarious though.
Marc:I'm surprised I didn't get like a spin off that character.
Guest:Just that character?
Guest:A sitcom?
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:And then I did the first season of Deadwood.
Guest:A lot of that stuff was really dramatic.
Guest:I didn't fall into comedy until after I did Veronica Mars.
Marc:Yeah, that's what I remember.
Guest:You don't remember.
Marc:I do.
Marc:I do.
Marc:I remember all of a sudden you were the comedy girl.
Marc:And before that you weren't.
Guest:Yeah, well, I guess you do.
Guest:When you explain it like that, Mark, I guess you do remember it.
Marc:Jesus Christ.
Marc:I'm serious.
Marc:I'm serious.
Marc:I knew you were around before, but it was like Saving Sarah with Sarah Marshall, right?
Marc:Yeah, Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Marc:Saving Sarah Marshall.
Marc:It's a war movie.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:It's a very romantic ending.
Marc:But then you were like this comedy person.
Yeah.
Guest:Yeah, well, I had always done more serious stuff, and I love serious stuff.
Guest:I got a lot of emotions, and I like to get them out through characters.
Guest:And then when I booked Sarah, I think I'm a brighter person.
Guest:My real personality is more bubbly, and then that started to become what I led with in auditions and then just started booking comedies.
Guest:Fell into comedy, really.
Marc:But the other one, the Veronica...
Guest:Veronica Mars show.
Marc:That was like a hugely popular nerd show, right?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Because I think there's like, I think in one of them, like, I don't remember what was the story.
Marc:I'd have to ask my producer where there was a Marc Maron poster or somewhere.
Guest:Oh, there might have been.
Guest:They were very pop culture reference-y throughout our show.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Oh, what was it?
Marc:I could ask Brendan.
Marc:Like, I remember, like, I can't remember what it was, but somebody said, like, your picture, your poster, something, an advertisement for, I don't think it was for Air America, but it was, it might have been in your room?
Guest:Well, yeah, because our, Rob Thomas, who created that show, and our writers were always very much in the know and into you and into everything sort of good.
Marc:I wasn't doing the podcast.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I don't know if he'll know.
Marc:He knows everything though.
Marc:But anyways, like that show kind of puts you on the map, right?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:How many seasons did you do?
Guest:Three.
Marc:But it was like one of those cult shows.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:It was rabid, rabid, rabid fans.
Guest:Well, you know, it was a really well-written character.
Guest:Rob, you know, they say you write in your alter ego and his alter ego is a 16 year old disgruntled teenager, but it,
Guest:I think it was very relatable and they used this sort of film noir lens to show how this girl got through high school and also how she was smarter than everyone else even though she'd been rejected and it just made you want to root for her and it was really fun to play and the jokes were really good.
Guest:It was really funny and it spoke to a lot of outcasts in high school which even if you talk to the popular kids in high school they still felt like outcasts so it gained notoriety but it was also always on the cusp of being canceled.
Guest:Always.
Marc:What network was it on?
Guest:Well, the first year it was on UPN.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Remember it?
Marc:Sure.
Guest:And then it went to the CW when that absorbed UPN.
Marc:And that was that?
Guest:Yeah, and we did three seasons.
Marc:And it just didn't get the ratings or what?
Guest:Yeah, it didn't actually, after the first season, it was on the bubble and the fans saved it every season.
Guest:We have a rabid, amazing fan base.
Guest:We call them marshmallows because there's a line from the pilot where Veronica, who's really tough, says, you know what they say about Veronica Mars?
Guest:She's a marshmallow.
Guest:And the marshmallows had...
Guest:The first season, I think they sent in Mars bars, like physical Mars bars to the UPN offices, I mean, by the thousands.
Guest:Wow.
Guest:And then the second season, someone had even gotten an airplane to fly over the CW office saying, save Veronica Mars.
Guest:And the third season, they would always come up with these kitschy ways to save the show.
Guest:There was an episode where I wrote on a dollar bill that
Guest:Veronica Mars is smarter than me.
Guest:And then I hid it for my nemesis to find.
Guest:And I said, wait, read it.
Guest:What does it say?
Guest:And then he had to say out loud, Veronica Mars is smarter than me.
Guest:And all the fans sent in dollar bills to the CW saying Veronica Mars is smarter than me.
Guest:And I mean, thousands and thousands of people.
Marc:And do they still, are you in touch with them?
Guest:All of the thousands of fans.
Guest:Not each one individually.
Guest:In my heart, I am.
Marc:But do they approach you still?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:I still hear whenever I am recognized.
Guest:Yeah, people say, Veronica Mars really got me through high school.
Guest:And it's a great feeling.
Marc:I think we've got some confirmation here.
Marc:It was a poster of your first CD in a recording studio.
Marc:Some character who was on the radio.
Mm-hmm.
Guest:Piz, played by Chris Lowell.
Guest:Chris, I just worked with Chris Lowell.
Guest:You did?
Guest:Oh, of course.
Marc:In Glow.
Guest:Okay, so that's who played my sometimes boyfriend on Veronica Mars.
Marc:Okay.
Guest:And he had a radio studio when we were, the first year Veronica went to college.
Guest:And then, yeah, in his radio studio must have been your poster.
Marc:That's right.
Marc:That was it.
Guest:Do you love Chris Lowell?
Marc:Yeah, I do.
Marc:We get along pretty well.
Marc:We're not, I'm sort of older in a way.
Guest:So that means you can't talk to other human beings and relate to them?
Marc:No, we talk and I relate to him, but he's on set.
Marc:He reads.
Marc:He takes pictures.
Marc:He talks to the ladies.
Marc:He's very artsy.
Marc:And I tend to sit by myself sometimes, but not in a brooding way.
Marc:Cool.
Marc:Just like I socialize occasionally, but it's my first big TV show, so I'm trying to stay in it, stay focused.
Guest:you say that but i know for a fact what i heard you say two days ago when i was with you is that you watched the entire uh 22 seasons of the sopranos on your phone while you were on set of glow so you might say you're trying to prepare for glow but you're watching the sopranos that was first season second season was a new mark you paid attention
Marc:I paid attention.
Marc:I stayed in the groove.
Marc:I learned how to use my time better.
Marc:I didn't eat as much.
Marc:I talked to Chris, but it seems to me that when you've been doing it a while, that you do figure out how you deal with that time.
Guest:Oh yeah, of course.
Marc:And he was really running around taking pictures a lot, but we respect each other and we get a few laughs and we have scenes together.
Marc:It's always good to work with him.
Guest:I adore him.
Marc:Yeah, he seems like a great guy.
Marc:He is.
Guest:But you're describing yourself like you're Oscar the Grouch or something on set.
Guest:Like, I don't really communicate with people.
Guest:I've got to bide my time before my scene.
Marc:No, I don't know what I do.
Marc:There's a lot of people on set.
Marc:There's so many.
Marc:And, like, I try to be sociable.
Marc:I sat with everybody this last season.
Marc:That's nice.
Marc:Well, all the women would cluster.
Marc:There's 14 of them or so, only in this one area.
Marc:And I just saw it like, that's exhausting.
Guest:I think I would agree with you.
Marc:And I just can't go over there.
Marc:I think it would be a difficult thing.
Marc:But this season, I put my chair with theirs and just hung out.
Guest:That's nice.
Guest:That means a lot when you all act like a group.
Marc:It wasn't that exhausting.
Marc:It was nice.
Marc:So now the Forgetting Sarah Marshall movie, who directed that movie?
Guest:Nick Stoller.
Marc:Oh, yeah.
Marc:I've talked to him.
Marc:He's a pleasant guy.
Guest:He's a smart guy.
Marc:Harvard guy.
Marc:Everything went right for that guy.
Guest:Very smart.
Marc:Right away.
Guest:Very smart.
Guest:Very funny.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I remember kind of busting on him.
Marc:Was that really your first huge movie?
Guest:Yeah.
Yeah.
Marc:And when you were shooting it, did you know that would happen?
Marc:No, I guess you don't.
Guest:Did I know that it was going to be huge?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Did you feel that?
Guest:No.
Guest:Well, I did because it was Judd.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Judd produced it.
Guest:Judd was the big guy in comedy and being in one of his movies meant that you were sort of a part of that or at least recognized.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:It felt like something very special.
Marc:I can't believe that was 2008.
Marc:That was a while ago.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I was a baby.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Oh, Mila Kunis, Russell Brand.
Marc:How was that?
Guest:You know what?
Guest:I don't have a bad word to say about him.
Marc:I have to talk to him, too.
Guest:I love Russell.
Marc:He's very excitable.
Guest:He's very excitable.
Guest:I love listening to him talk because it's like listening to crazy opera music.
Guest:It's like you can't tell where it's going.
Guest:His vocabulary is very stimulating.
Guest:But, you know, at the time, he had all these, like,
Guest:I don't know, just you thought he might be disrespectful or something.
Guest:I didn't experience any of that.
Guest:I had a lot of like sex scenes with him, like raunchy sex scenes.
Guest:And I found him to be a gentleman and worried about whether or not my pasties were showing.
Guest:And I found him to be quite lovely.
Marc:Oh, good.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Well, you're going to know at that point.
Marc:During a sex scene, you're going to know someone's respectful.
Guest:Yes, and he wasn't.
Guest:He diverted his eyes, and he'd say, you can stay under the sheet.
Guest:Do you want me to get you water?
Guest:I found him to be nothing but lovely.
Marc:That's good.
Marc:That's nice to hear.
Marc:All right, so you've done a lot of things.
Guest:Okay.
Marc:But this show that you're doing now, after hearing you talk about it when we did that roundtable, you seem to really love this thing.
Guest:Yeah, I do.
Guest:Well, I love Mike Schur.
Guest:I have been obsessed with Mike for a while.
Marc:Because he's a genius?
Guest:He is a genius.
Guest:Another genius?
Guest:He's another genius.
Guest:I know a lot of geniuses.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Well, I like to hitch my wagon to the geniuses.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:But, you know, I mean, he did, you know, The Office and then Parks and Rec and Brooklyn Nine-Nine.
Guest:And he's just a very smart guy.
Guest:And he's also a nice human being to work for.
Guest:And he, like me, is completely preoccupied with what it means to be a good person and how we are supposed to share Earth together.
Guest:Because we're not here alone.
Guest:We have to figure out how to make it work for everyone.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:He's preoccupied with that.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Like he tells the story of having the idea for the show about he was, you know, he goes to the same Starbucks every day when he's writing and he, you know, waits for his coffee.
Guest:And he realized one day, you know, he pays for his coffee and then puts the change in the tip jar.
Guest:And he realized that as the barista turned around, he held his hand back to wait until the barista turned towards him so that the barista could witness him putting the tip in.
Guest:And he left feeling awful.
Guest:He was like, why did I do that?
Guest:Why did that barista witnessing this make it more of an ego boost for me?
Guest:I mean, it's like, what, 75 cents or something?
Guest:He's like, why am I doing good things?
Guest:Is it only to be noticed?
Guest:Does everyone do good things only to be noticed?
Guest:Or is there some true ethical North Star that we follow?
Guest:And what do great philosophers have to say about it?
Guest:So he wanted to make a show about...
Guest:that would that would layer in philosophy lessons like big philosophy lessons into a digestible comedy format so he came up with this idea about an asshole that accidentally got into heaven a clerical error so I play this dick basically that's in heaven but really doesn't deserve to be there and because not that because she's malicious but she's just really not concerned with anyone else but herself yeah and then she starts to learn why it's important to care about other people
Marc:Huh.
Marc:And were you the person that he chose from the beginning when they developed it?
Guest:Yes, which is still kind of astounding for me to say out loud because he had called my answering machine and was like, hey, Kristen, it's Mike.
Guest:I want to talk to you about a project.
Guest:And I was like...
Guest:Oh my God, Dax, Mike sure just called my answering machine.
Guest:He must talk about something.
Guest:Oh my God.
Guest:And I went in and Mike is an incredible orator.
Guest:He's such a good storyteller.
Guest:I remember the conversation lasted like three hours.
Guest:Really?
Guest:He told me about this whole world that he wanted to explore in heaven, quote unquote.
Guest:And I was like, I'm in.
Guest:He's like, also, I wanted to be Ted Danson to play Michael, the angel.
Guest:And I was like, well, I'm definitely in because I'd done a movie with Ted Danson.
Marc:Which one?
Guest:Big Miracle.
Guest:It was about whales, about this whale rescue.
Guest:And we were in Alaska together, and it was Drew Barrymore and John Krasinski and a bunch of people.
Guest:But Dax and I love binge-watching television, and we get real, real rabid about it.
Guest:We just finished the first season of Damages.
Guest:Did you see Damages?
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Marc:I didn't watch it, no.
Guest:Oh, my God.
Guest:It's so good.
Guest:And the whole season is about...
Guest:this big court case the frobisher case the frobisher arthur frobisher is growing on trial and he plays arthur frobisher and i at that point was like so wrapped up in damages world that i changed our aliases at our house to get mail to holly and arthur frobisher because i'm a nerd and then when i met him in the hotel in alaska for the first time i was like mr danson very nice to meet you my name is kristen bell um
Guest:Don't scare you, but this may excite you.
Guest:I am checked into this hotel as Holly Frobisher, your wife from Damages.
Guest:And he was like, oh, OK, nice to meet you.
Guest:And I'll see you on set.
Guest:I think I scared the shit out of him.
Guest:But thankfully, we became friends.
Marc:You were all excited about your big idea.
Guest:I was so excited.
Guest:I was like, he's going to be so impressed.
Marc:You had no thought that it would come off as a stalker.
Guest:No, no.
Guest:Because I was not thinking I was a stalker.
Guest:I was just really excited.
Guest:Right, of course.
Guest:And now he's one of my best friends.
Marc:He seems like a very sweet guy.
Guest:He is.
Guest:He's an American treasure.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:As are you.
Guest:Oh, thank you.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But like acting with somebody like... I mean, do you...
Marc:What do you use from your toolbox when you do these things to hold the character to stay in that game?
Marc:I mean, do you just use the script?
Marc:I'm always looking for tricks.
Marc:Do you have tricks that you do?
Marc:Or is it just natural now?
Marc:You've been doing it a long time.
Guest:I don't know.
Guest:I mean, to be honest, for an actor to talk about their process makes me a little pukey.
Marc:No, I know.
Marc:But how about think of it this way?
Marc:If you were talking to a young actor who is good but maybe that young actor gets nervous before a scene or he can't quite keep his focus before a scene or sometimes he has a hard time staying in character when he's in the scene, what would you tell that person?
Guest:And this person's name is... Fictional character's name is Mark.
Marc:No.
Marc:I don't get those.
Marc:I sometimes get a little self-conscious.
Marc:But not in an insecure way.
Marc:Just sort of like, oh, I'm saying words.
Marc:That's this other guy.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I think for me it...
Guest:I do really well with sarcasm.
Guest:Right.
Guest:I'm a fairly sarcastic person, so if the character is written super sincere, I have to work a little bit harder to stay sincere, you know?
Guest:And I always did when I was doing drama as well.
Guest:I think there... Because I have a toolbox that's, you know, all these different acting techniques, I can pull from any of them, but I guess what I'd say to someone is just... If it feels insincere...
Guest:Don't do it.
Guest:Don't don't don't even say it until it feels sincere.
Guest:Even if you're walking through a door and you're going to say, hi, don't do it until you actually feel like making eye contact with the other person and saying hi.
Guest:It's like as simple as that.
Guest:It's you can only know that in your heart.
Guest:Don't ever act in front of the mirror.
Guest:Don't ever try to do anything.
Guest:But conversely, I know a lot of actors that like need another take because they didn't feel it.
Guest:And after I puke, I think to myself, sometimes it does not matter if you felt it, if the person behind the lens is saying we got it.
Guest:So I'm both an emotional actor, but a very technical actor as well in that I don't need to feel this.
Guest:If you say we got it, you're the storyteller.
Guest:You're behind the lens.
Guest:You think I look distraught enough?
Guest:Great.
Guest:Let's move on.
Guest:Because the reality is we're all spending 15 hours a day together.
Guest:We want to go home to our families.
Marc:At some point.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:You'd like to maybe leave the set.
Guest:Yeah.
Yeah.
Marc:I had a conversation with Josh Brolin the other day, and it was very interesting.
Marc:Like the thing that I got, he was talking about No Country for Old Men.
Marc:And he was talking about that character and about doing the scene with his wife, whoever, that woman, I can't remember her name, who played his girlfriend or his wife.
Marc:Is she French?
Guest:No, I think she's Irish.
Marc:Irish, that's right.
Guest:She was the girl in Brave.
Marc:Yeah, she's great.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:But there was something not working about the scenes with the two of them.
Marc:And Brolin realized it was that because they were looking at each other.
Marc:Like, you know, when you talk to somebody like in an acting, when you're rehearsing or you're in an acting class, you're just doing that thing.
Marc:And he realized like couples don't.
Guest:Don't do that.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Interesting.
Marc:Right.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And it wasn't sincere.
Guest:Right.
Marc:Right.
Marc:So like, and I, and I thought about that, like, you know, cause, cause as a guy who's not, you know, completely used to acting, you know, there's that thing of like, what am I doing with my hands?
Marc:You know, should I be looking?
Guest:Hands are the worst.
Guest:I never know what to do with my hands.
Guest:I'm like, they're just supposed to sit there like that.
Marc:You know, you don't think about them otherwise, unless you're acting.
Marc:Exactly.
Marc:If you've got to get that hand sings a fucking problem.
Guest:It's the worst.
Marc:What time is your thing?
Marc:Three?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:What time is it now?
Marc:2.38.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:So, well, good.
Marc:The Good Place, we know the second season, there's a big turn.
Marc:You already spoiled that on the show I did with you before.
Guest:Whoopsie.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But is it not on yet?
Guest:We've had two seasons.
Marc:So everyone knows.
Guest:And we're about to come back for the third season.
Marc:How does this sustain?
Marc:Does he have a big Bible?
Marc:Does he know exactly how this arcs out?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:He knows it in his head.
Guest:He knows where it's going to end.
Marc:Yeah.
Yeah.
Guest:And that's not a lie.
Guest:Like a lot of people say, oh, I know how it's going to end.
Guest:He actually does know how it's going to end, but he's wrapped it up sort of philosophically in his head.
Marc:Oh, so that could go on forever.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Well, ish.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Stay interesting, you know.
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:Just add people.
Marc:I guess.
Guest:Just add more characters?
Marc:Yeah, 115.
Guest:Okay, that's a great idea.
Marc:Right, 115.
Guest:I'm going to text Mike for that.
Marc:Yeah, just say you never have to stop the show.
Marc:Just keep adding new characters.
Marc:Who was talking about that on that panel we did about Lost?
Guest:Was it Bill saying that they just kept adding more figurines?
Guest:Right.
Guest:More characters, more characters, more characters?
Guest:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Guest:It's crazy.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Steven Pinker.
Guest:Nice.
Guest:I just saw a Steven Pinker lecture.
Guest:You did?
Guest:How was it?
Guest:It was great.
Guest:Him and Sam Harris.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Talking about evolution now.
Marc:So you went to the lecture?
Marc:You like doing that?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Love.
Marc:And you learned things and it expanded your mind.
Guest:Big time, yeah.
Guest:I like being challenged a lot.
Guest:That's why I like my husband, because he challenges me every fucking day.
Guest:Dax does?
Guest:Yes, because we disagree on 99.9% of things.
Guest:Where'd you meet that guy?
Guest:We met the woman who produced Sarah Marshall, Shauna Robertson, who's Judd's old partner.
Guest:She had a birthday dinner and there were like 10 people there and I met him there and I don't, I didn't know who he was and he didn't know who I was.
Guest:I just remember that he was talking so much, so, so much.
Guest:And then I left and then two weeks later we ran into each other at a hockey game at LA Kings versus the Red Wings, our home state game.
Guest:And I met him and he started flirting with me.
Marc:And he was sober already?
Guest:Yes, he was three years sober, yeah.
Marc:Wow.
Marc:And that was the beginning?
Guest:That was the beginning, yeah.
Guest:Well, the end for me.
Marc:But we talked briefly in the kitchen when we were discussing our relationship while you were washing dishes and I was putting stuff away.
Guest:I love us.
Guest:I love us.
Marc:That that initially he wasn't into being married?
Guest:No, not at all.
Guest:He doesn't.
Guest:Well, he had not he had yet to have a monogamous relationship.
Guest:I don't know what I was doing dating a guy.
Guest:I was like, yeah, I guess I could be monogamous, but I never have been before.
Guest:I've always had open relationships.
Marc:Who are you dating before that?
Guest:A wonderful man, another producer named Kevin, and we had dated for five years.
Marc:Five years.
Guest:I have always had long-term boyfriends.
Guest:I'd had a boyfriend in college for two, then a boyfriend after college for three and a half, then Kevin for five.
Marc:That guy probably thought it was going to happen.
Guest:Yeah, I think we both did.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And then we just grew apart.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:But I love him.
Guest:I mean, I love him.
Guest:I'm still friends with him.
Guest:But Dax, he... And look, he has very valid arguments.
Guest:Even when he's... I feel like he's being, you know, what I would label without hearing his argument as closed-minded, he's not.
Guest:He said...
Guest:If I'm going to love you, I'm going to prove it to you every day.
Guest:I don't need to tell the state of California that I love you.
Guest:That has nothing to do.
Guest:You're going to know by my actions that I will act like your husband.
Guest:And I said, yeah, I get it.
Guest:I grew up in a traditional area.
Guest:And I finally had come to terms with and sort of peace with the fact that we were never going to get married.
Guest:And then out of the blue, he popped the question.
Guest:I had no idea.
Marc:It was all a big setup.
Guest:I guess.
Marc:But I think that the idea, because I've had these conversations before having been married twice and I'm with somebody now and she would like to probably get married.
Marc:But there's part of me that's kind of, I don't know why I resist it, but I don't trust it all the time.
Marc:And I think that they, you know, you ladies.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:that there there there's a sense of security there or else commitment but but you know when you've been divorced twice you're like yeah but that's not that's that's that's that's true but that's true i get and nothing has to last forever i think the forever of it all is what look i don't fault anyone who gets a divorce like every time a you know celebrity couple splits up everyone's like well we have to believe in love i'm like
Guest:But don't you want those two people to be their best selves?
Guest:And maybe that's not together.
Guest:Like, I don't I don't put the belief in that, that, like, I need to see true love and I need to see people together.
Guest:I want people to be healthy and thrive, even if that means I think that's interesting that you didn't take Jesus from your mom.
Marc:But the the the the ability to move on.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:from marriage to marriage, whatever, that's okay.
Guest:That's fine with me.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I just want people to be, look, happiness versus suffering.
Guest:You should not stay in a marriage where you're suffering, either of you.
Guest:But, you know, I think that labeling it as a marriage has maybe a different, there's a difference in the way that people treat you as a couple or treat you as a married man versus a man who has a girlfriend.
Marc:Right.
Marc:Right.
Marc:They treat you that way.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Something flattens out in your affect and you kind of-
Guest:also like who cares get married don't get married i don't give a fuck like whatever works for you it works yeah for well we were engaged for three or four years before we ever got married it wasn't like priority number one he gave me a ring i thought it was really nice and then to be honest i had like i said already come to terms with the fact we weren't getting married but then we had kids yeah and like you have to do this whole like will thing and if one of us you had kids before you were married
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Bastards.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Big time.
Marc:Oh, good.
Guest:So if like.
Marc:Did you tell them that yet?
Guest:What?
Marc:Did you tell them that yet?
Guest:They'll know.
Guest:Yeah, of course.
Guest:Yeah, we have.
Guest:We said we weren't married.
Marc:You're going to die and you're a bastard.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:What's for breakfast?
Guest:We've got to be blunt and give them the truth.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:That's what Steven Pinker would say.
Guest:We.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:There's like a whole will thing you have to do.
Guest:And then like if, you know, somebody's in the hospital, only certain people can enter the room if you're not married.
Guest:So it's just we just decided, fuck it.
Guest:It's easier.
Guest:Let's just go to the courthouse and do it.
Marc:Right there.
Marc:Oh, the other stuff.
Marc:And there's insurance.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:And for the kids.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:That's why we did it.
Marc:Oh, yeah.
Marc:Oh, well, that's romantic.
Marc:All right.
Marc:Well, let's get you to your call.
Marc:What's the call?
Marc:Am I involved?
Marc:Can I photobomb your Skype meeting?
Guest:Yeah, absolutely.
Guest:We're pitching a show to YouTube, my producing partners.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:This will be fun.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:So you'll tell me what I have to say?
Guest:Absolutely.
Marc:Do you want me to be part of it?
Guest:I kind of just want you to sit there and look pretty if you wouldn't mind.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Well, I'm going to have to go.
Guest:Stereotypical female role.
Guest:I want you to just be.
Marc:How much time do I have?
Marc:I have to do my face.
Guest:No, you look gorgeous.
Marc:I don't.
Guest:Yes, you do.
Guest:Don't let anybody tell you.
Marc:Thank you.
Guest:I'm ready.
Marc:I'm ready for my close up.
Marc:Thanks for coming over.
Guest:Thanks for having me.
Marc:Wasn't that lovely?
Marc:And then she just left.
Marc:She just left.
Marc:I never talked to her again.
Marc:I have not talked to her again.
Marc:I think I might have seen her at a thing, but, you know, we're busy.
Marc:All right, so that's what do we do at the end here?
Marc:Go to WTFpod.com to get my tour dates.
Marc:Buy one of the new T-shirts and sign up for WTF Premium.
Marc:You can do all those things.
Marc:You can hear all nine years of WTF episodes commercial-free.
Marc:I've got that show in New York coming up in November.
Marc:You can go to WTFpod.com slash tour, I believe.
Marc:There's probably some tickets for that.
Marc:I think the Phoenix show is sold out.
Marc:The Denver shows are sold out.
Marc:All leading up to the Beacon in New York.
Marc:I don't know where that's at, but I imagine there's still a few tickets.
Marc:Big space, big room.
Marc:You know, I'm not an arena act.
Marc:You know what I mean?
Marc:Can you hear my beard rubbing?
Marc:Fucking hell.
Marc:I'm going to try to play guitar with my fingers again, like all the blues men.
Marc:Boomer lives!