Episode 85 - Dane Cook / The Nicotine Diaries
Guest:Lock the gates!
Marc:Are we doing this?
Marc:Really?
Marc:Wait for it.
Marc:Are we doing this?
Marc:Wait for it.
Marc:Pow!
Marc:What the fuck?
Marc:And it's also, eh, what the fuck?
Marc:What's wrong with me?
Marc:It's time for WTF!
Guest:What the fuck?
Guest:With Mark Maron.
Marc:Okay, let's do this.
Marc:How are you, what-the-fuckers?
Marc:What-the-fuck buddies?
Marc:What-the-fuckineers?
Marc:What-the-fuck nicks?
Marc:What-the-fucking-ots?
Marc:Nots, that's what the fuck, like travelers, like knots, like astronauts, like argonauts, like how many knots are there?
Marc:I don't fucking know.
Marc:Look, I'm on day five.
Marc:Day five with no nicotine.
Marc:And I don't know, man.
Marc:I put together a little diary for you leading up to this day.
Marc:And we'll get to that in a minute.
Marc:I want to give you an update on the pants.
Marc:What the fuck is wrong with me?
Marc:What am I?
Marc:15?
Marc:Who the hell buys that bunch of bullshit?
Marc:Like, I care that much about pants that I'm gonna... I went and watched a video that somebody sent me of Jesse Thorne from The Sound of Young America, who's a real fashion pussy, was talking about what to do with pants, and I watched his video, and he just soaked them in the hot water for a certain type of fade, and I realized that after I'd spent that time in the bathtub, and then again I soaked them in hot water and put them on wet and wore them all day, that I don't sense any difference whatsoever.
Marc:And...
Marc:and they're just pants, and they're not going to change that much.
Marc:I thought for some reason, maybe it's because I'm without nicotine, and I think that every decision I make at this point in time is a life-altering decision.
Marc:I want so badly to shave my head, I can't even begin to tell you.
Marc:I don't even know where that comes from.
Marc:But whenever I get off nicotine or I'm clean like this, that my my sense of self is so squirrely and I'm so, you know, irritable.
Marc:And my sense of self-esteem is fucked.
Marc:And like all I want to do now, I'm looking at my hair.
Marc:I'm like, oh, my hair is old.
Marc:Look at it.
Marc:It's curly on the sides.
Marc:I look ridiculous.
Marc:I want to shave it off.
Marc:And then I know what happens.
Marc:And I shave my head and I'm like, oh, my God, I look ridiculous.
Marc:So this pantsing, I really wanted to solve all all things.
Marc:And I don't even know if that's relative to nicotine.
Marc:I just wanted to have all the answers.
Marc:It's like my boots.
Marc:It's like whatever it is.
Marc:Somebody tells me, like, if I soak myself in the water like that, that they're going to be perfect, that they're going to fit me and they're going to know me and they're going to become part of my skin and they're going to be the best thing I ever had on my ass and my balls and my knees and my calves and my hammies.
Marc:My hammies are covered.
Marc:And then like after the second time it did, it just is what it is.
Marc:They're just pants and I'm probably going to wash them and put them in the dryer.
Marc:Okay?
Marc:So fuck that.
Marc:I'm a grown person.
Marc:I had a good time pretending like these would answer all the questions and make me feel good about everything.
Marc:They don't.
Marc:They're all right.
Marc:I like the color of them.
Marc:I should have bought them in a different size probably.
Marc:I should have bought them a little tighter.
Marc:Maybe.
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:Maybe we'll see after I get.
Marc:You know what?
Marc:Forget.
Marc:Just let's not talk about this anymore.
Marc:I'm tired of it.
Marc:So Dane Cook called me on the phone.
Marc:It was very intense on the phone.
Marc:I remember getting the phone call in San Francisco.
Marc:Phone rings.
Marc:I'm like, hello.
Marc:He's like, Mark, it's Dane Cook.
Marc:And I was thinking, oh, my God, is it like this all the time?
Marc:Do you always talk at this level of intensity?
Marc:Is it just this wah, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba?
Marc:and it is it is it varies in in uh volume uh i i talked to him and you will hear that in a minute but first what i'd like to do is uh take a little hit of this pow whoa did i just shit my pants or what that was iced just coffee from just coffee.coop which you can get at wtfpod.com
Marc:I did say something on stage last night that I'm quite proud of.
Marc:I said, jokes are like, they're just cocks.
Marc:Jokes are cocks.
Marc:There's going to be a lot of guys up here on stage tonight.
Marc:And right on your forehead, you have a third eye or the top chakra, or as I like to call it, the brain pussy.
Marc:And we're just going to try to push our joke cocks into your brain pussy and shoot a load of funny right into your mind.
Marc:And some of you will resist and it will seem like rape.
Marc:But, you know, if you let it in, you never know what you might experience.
Marc:I said, you're going to be brain fucked by clowns tonight repeatedly.
Marc:I was kind of happy with that.
Marc:I enjoy doing that.
Marc:I like the idea of the brain pussy.
Marc:Anyways, that's neither here nor there.
Marc:Day five.
Marc:I'll tell you what's going on today.
Marc:I'm still feeling the Jones.
Marc:I've got a hungry heart.
Marc:My heart is hungry for closure, for satisfaction, for something that will make me feel better.
Marc:The pants didn't do it.
Marc:And I keep thinking, like, I need to have something I can put in my mouth to make me feel better.
Marc:That's not a gay thing.
Marc:I don't want a cock in my mouth.
Marc:I'm doing a lot of Altoids.
Marc:I seem to be filling the gap.
Marc:But it wasn't like this all week long.
Marc:It got pretty bad.
Marc:Here is a bit of a nicotine diary.
Marc:A nicotine withdrawal diary for you.
Marc:enjoy and then dane cook who i think i understand a little more as a guy who's never done any drugs the intensity that comes from not doing anything and still needing all that love i think answers to some of his intensity i get it
Marc:Okay, this is it.
Marc:No nicotine.
Marc:Day one.
Marc:All right.
Marc:Look, I've been through this kind of thing before, but on this day, I have clarity.
Marc:I've committed.
Marc:My will is in the right place.
Marc:It took a long time, well, at least a couple weeks, to work towards the decision, to rewire my brain, to not...
Marc:you know, stick lozenges in my mouth or chew nicotine gum or that fucking snooze.
Marc:The snooze is the thing that's killing me, I think.
Marc:Like, how long can you go on telling yourself that, like, well, I'm not going to be the one that gets sick.
Marc:I'm not going to be the one that gets the cancer.
Marc:I'm not, you know, I hear it happens.
Marc:I hear rumors that tobacco is bad for you, but I don't think it's going to be me.
Marc:I mean, how long does that shit hold up?
Marc:Anyways, so this is day one.
Marc:I've got some clarity, I've got the energy, but right now I'm not freaking out because I think it's excitement.
Marc:I think I feel excited and I'm not freaking out.
Marc:Though it was sort of a tough morning in the sense that usually I wake up and I just, I have coffee and I stick a really strong packet of snooze into my face and then I sit down and I enjoy it.
Marc:So that's not happening right now.
Marc:But I'm excited about it because I've made a decision, though the snooze is still in the fridge.
Marc:But I don't want it.
Marc:I don't want it.
Marc:all right all right all right day two not so great fuck it man like okay here's what's going on here's what's going on day two is that all of a sudden i don't what difference does it make and that's a question i'm asking about everything all right and i didn't i wasn't feeling that way yesterday or the day before when i was still doing shit what difference does it make fuck it
Marc:See, that's that's the sickness.
Marc:That's the sickness is that my brain, because it's so hungry for its for its for its endorphin feeders, for its fucking food, for its nicotine is saying, dude, what difference does it make?
Marc:Fuck it.
Marc:Life is short.
Marc:You know, die of mouth cancer.
Marc:Life is short.
Marc:What the fuck, man?
Marc:Enjoy what you enjoy.
Marc:Could end any second.
Marc:Could end during this monologue.
Marc:Could end during this nicotine diary, whatever the fuck.
Marc:It could be like, and then I fall, and it's over, and you will have not had nicotine in your mouth, a snooze, or a nicotine lozenge.
Marc:Okay.
Guest:Fuck it, man.
Guest:I don't know if I'm going to make it.
Guest:God damn it.
Marc:How can I be feeling this one on day two?
Marc:God damn it.
Marc:I gotta throw that shit away that's in the fridge.
Guest:Oh, man.
Guest:Oh!
Guest:Fuck!
Fuck!
Marc:Day three.
Marc:Everything is fucking bothering me.
Marc:I feel bad for people have to pretend all the time that they're keeping their shit together, that they like who they're working with or that they're OK at home or that like, you know, when you drop something on the ground that you didn't want to drop, it isn't the end of the fucking world.
Marc:Because in my life right now, it is.
Marc:It's making me nuts.
Marc:It's like my entire body just is like wants to blast off or blast apart, kind of explode into particles and regroup.
Marc:regroup around a piece of nicotine something it wants to regroup every every cell in my body wants to regroup around nicotine around nicotine i'm denying it that i can feel the hunger in every cell of my fucking body right now every cell is just sort of like dude dude dude what's up what's up where we at with this where we at with every cell of every organ of every vein of every blood
Marc:thing of every every every bone cell every fucking cell with every strand of DNA in my body is like where are we at with this where are we at with this what are we doing what's going on come on I want out I want out I'm feeling a little antsy all my cells are antsy they're all antsy oh shit god damn it
Marc:Holy shit.
Marc:God, this craving is ridiculous.
Marc:Day four, I want to die.
Marc:I'm fucking losing it.
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:Time doesn't seem to make sense.
Marc:Emotions doesn't seem to make sense.
Marc:I had an active argument with my penis today.
Marc:Oh, fuck.
Guest:Look at the size of that spider on the wall.
Marc:It better be there or else I'm withdrawing much harder than I thought.
Marc:Around the fucking garage.
Marc:It's 11... Man, I can't take this shit.
Marc:I don't know what the fuck I'm doing.
Marc:Why am I not doing this?
Marc:Why does it have to be bad for me?
Marc:Why can't... Why can't I just inject this shit?
Marc:The only reason I'm not doing nicotine is because I don't want my mouth to turn into a fucking sewer of cancer and pus.
Marc:Fucking snooze.
Marc:It can't be good.
Marc:I think the nicotine gum in the last one just fucked up my gums.
Marc:I would so be on it right now.
Marc:I already feel myself.
Marc:I just put on 13 pounds sitting here.
Marc:And I'm fucking going out of my mind.
Marc:I can't manage my brain.
Marc:I did some comedy, but I was very erratic and raw and fucked up.
Marc:I just don't like... I feel myself trying to talk myself into just doing the nicotine, but it doesn't make me feel good.
Marc:Why not do the patch?
Marc:Just to maintain.
Marc:But why do I need something to maintain?
Marc:At some point, my levels have got to fucking...
Marc:I've got to level off.
Marc:This is the fourth day in.
Marc:I'm drinking a lot of coffee.
Marc:I'm doing anything I can to make myself feel better.
Marc:But this is bad.
Marc:It's bad.
Guest:I've got a whole tin of snooze just sitting in the fucking fridge.
Guest:I could just put one in my mouth and end this misery to enter a new misery or the old misery.
Guest:Why don't I just smoke cigarettes?
Guest:This is uncomfortable, man.
Guest:I'm not sure that my baseline is good.
Guest:I'm not sure that I get rid of everything that I'm fucking...
Guest:I might not be cut out for this shit, this not being medicated somehow.
Guest:I mean, I've been sober a long time, but this is clearly a mind fucker, this one.
Guest:I mean, I'm not sweating, but I'm pretty crazy.
Guest:I just always feel like, how about now?
Guest:Can we do a little now?
Guest:How about now?
Guest:What about now?
Guest:Can we have some?
Guest:How about now?
Guest:We just did the podcasting.
Guest:Come on, can we have a little?
Guest:Just have a gum or something.
Guest:Come on, we just ate.
Guest:Come on, dude.
Guest:We just ate.
Guest:Can we have a little?
Guest:Come on, man.
Guest:That's what my monkey sounds like.
Guest:Dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude.
Guest:Come on.
Guest:Just a little bit.
Guest:Come on, just have a little.
Guest:Come on, relax us.
Guest:Come on, just have a little.
Guest:Come on, just have one.
Guest:It'll be good.
Marc:You can have a few, but just don't go crazy, right?
Marc:Don't go crazy.
Marc:Maybe one a day.
Marc:One a day.
Marc:I've never had anything for one a day.
Guest:I hear drumming in the distance.
Guest:Do you guys hear that?
Guest:I am drumming in the distance.
Marc:Are my levels okay?
Marc:Am I not talking loud enough?
Marc:See, I can't even talk like I used to.
Marc:I'm fluctuating.
Marc:Everything's fluctuating with this no nicotine shit.
Oh my God.
Guest:And I'm gonna fucking eat some ice cream.
Guest:I'm just gonna, and I'm having sex a lot.
Guest:But that won't fill the hole.
Guest:Nothing's gonna fill the hole except for the hole itself.
Guest:Nothing's going to fill the hole except the hole itself.
Guest:Fuck you, Buddha.
Guest:Fuck you.
Guest:And fuck this shit.
Guest:I should just... I'm going to go have some snooze.
Guest:Don't do it.
Guest:Come on, dude.
Guest:Just a taste.
Guest:You can just have a little bit.
Guest:You can just have one, really.
Guest:Shut up.
Guest:Shut it.
Guest:Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Marc:Dane Cook is setting up a camera on my bookshelf, and he's rearranging my books as we speak.
Marc:We'll start the interview proper when he gets done.
Marc:You think that's going to give us a shot we need?
Marc:You think it's done?
Guest:That's it.
Marc:It's going to work?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Hey, what's up, whoever's... All right.
Marc:All right.
Marc:So now the pressure's on me because I wasn't anticipating being on camera.
Marc:i'm in full makeup and costume see why didn't you tell me that see now i have been punked here like now i'm gonna be on your website on the camera look what we did to mark maron at his own podcast how are you can you hear yourself in your head i can't it's very loud is it too loud it's about as loud as the voice is in my head naturally but how's that better that's good thank you all right i didn't know if you were someone who liked to hear yourself talk
Guest:Uh, no.
Guest:I actually don't really like the sound of my own voice at all.
Guest:How is that possible?
Guest:Because my father was a, uh, broadcaster.
Guest:And his outgoing voicemail message at his house was so elegant.
Guest:It's just like one of the most beautiful radio voices.
Guest:Uh-huh.
Guest:He did a lot of sports commentary, which is getting back to why I'm, I must watch sports.
Marc:Why you couldn't, uh, could do this podcast earlier because you've been so broken up about the Celtics.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Yes.
Marc:Have you been kicking shit around your house and crying and upset?
Guest:I went to every game from the Orlando series all the way through.
Guest:I literally was on a pilgrimage to follow the Celtics.
Marc:Are you pals with them?
Marc:I mean, do you have some sort of, are you like floor guy?
Marc:Are you like the Spike Lee of the Celtics?
Guest:I did pull favors, and because I performed back there, I knew some hookups to be able to sit on the floor.
Guest:At the garden, you mean?
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:So I was up close and personal, but it's, yeah, I'm not happy today with the Lakers parade going on.
Marc:But do you have a relationship with them where you can yell at them, where you can stand up and do your Dane Cook-isms, like start strutting the floor of the garden saying, no!
Guest:No!
Guest:No, I'm actually like I feel I'm one of those people who feels like if I'm quiet and focused, somehow I'm helping the team.
Guest:If I just if I just stare at the score, I can somehow manipulate it.
Guest:I'm like powder bending spoons or something.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:Now, okay, well, have you had any experience where you've seen success in that concentration?
Marc:I mean, you're a very focused guy.
Marc:If there's one thing I know, you're very focused.
Marc:I mean, when you called me on my phone when Bill Burr gave you my number, and then I'm just walking through the streets of San Francisco, and I'm like, hello, and you go, Mark.
Marc:It's Dane Cook.
Guest:What?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Yeah, it was very intense.
Marc:Like, right out of the phone, I'm like, oh, my God, is he standing and saying that?
Marc:I really thought you might have been, like, delivering it.
Guest:I was actually standing on the rooftop of a building overlooking the city.
Guest:No, you were not.
Guest:I fight crime sometimes when I'm not pursuing these humorous shenanigans.
Guest:I don't, you know, it's so funny, man, because you're a good guy to talk to about this because I don't really know how I come across this.
Marc:You have a very deliberate way of... You're very focused.
Marc:It's very deliberate.
Marc:I am focused.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And it comes through... It's like each consonant is like, boom!
Marc:It just has a little punch to it.
Marc:I treat every word like a bullet.
Marc:God forbid you actually got angry.
Guest:when i'm angry though i'm actually awful i go the other way oh really you ask you all of my exes i i'm the one i get quiet i'm like you know we don't need to do it like this oh you go that way yeah which is passive aggressive considered by most girls right and that's what gets shit thrown at you uh-huh sure that gets shit thrown at you but you never build up and like if they keep pushing you don't go shut the
Guest:I did once.
Guest:I had this one girl where I was like, I remember I said to her, I go, you need to give me 10 seconds by myself.
Guest:And it was the thing where I was biting down so hard.
Guest:You've got to have rage, man, because I see the posture.
Guest:Your posture is built for rage.
Guest:It's got to be in there.
Guest:it's i don't know maybe a lot of it just comes out in performance but i'm not a uh i'm not an unhappy guy i don't carry a lot of stuff around right and i could so you choose not to you don't drink it i'll be honest with you right now today is the first interview i ever done on this podcast without nicotine and caffeine i i've gotten off the gum today for me
Marc:Yeah, I wanted to feel what it felt like to be Dane Cook for a few minutes.
Marc:Like, I haven't drank or done drugs in 10 years, you know, but I mean, I'm usually a little amped up on shit.
Marc:Gotcha.
Marc:So I probably have a little more edge to me, and I'm trying to figure out how a guy can go through life without doing anything.
Guest:Well, here's the thing, you know, there's all this, I mean, when I first met you, or when, I should say when I first encountered your very powerful presence, certainly you were probably in a different place in your life.
Marc:Where was that day?
Guest:It was in the Comedy Cellar, and the only way I can describe how I felt when I first encountered you was, you remember the scene in The Mummy where the sand creature comes across the desert?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And there's like a face in it.
Guest:Come on.
Guest:That's how you were in my eyes.
Guest:Come on.
Guest:Man, it was me against the world when I came to New York.
Guest:Oh, come on, man.
Guest:Oh, man, everybody, come on.
Guest:You were scared?
Guest:Oh, you were intimidated?
Guest:I was terrified, man.
Guest:By me?
Guest:You don't realize... People don't realize, Mark, that I fought through so much... Look, we all fight through crazy banana shit as comedians, but my thing was when I went to New York City, I was...
Guest:having anxiety and panic attacks every night.
Guest:I was nowhere near the persona that people saw on stage.
Guest:I was very introverted, shy, and scared of all of you.
Guest:Really.
Marc:Well, some of them are genuinely scary.
Marc:And I guess I could be.
Guest:You have a very, very powerful presence yourself.
Marc:I heard that you thought I didn't like you.
Guest:but you made that abundantly clear when i would say hi mark and you would kind of like mumble some latin thing all right keep moving yeah okay all right i didn't like you we had very different uh perspectives maybe at that point i'm sure we still do yes do you think we're gonna learn that today okay let's get at it so no no no but all right so you get to new york that's 1994
Guest:Yeah, then and about, yeah.
Guest:And you've been doing comedy, what, about four years?
Guest:Came out of Boston, started in 1990, the year I graduated high school.
Guest:Two weeks later, I was open mic nights at Catch Rising Star.
Marc:Right, down in, do I remember that?
Marc:I wasn't there.
Marc:I was gone.
Marc:I was there for, why didn't I meet you there?
Marc:I was there 89, 90, 91.
Guest:I was around.
Guest:I would see you guys down there because I would go and watch open mics.
Guest:David Cross had cross comedy and such.
Guest:So I was just kind of hanging around there until I graduated.
Guest:And then it was, okay, I'm just going to jump in.
Guest:And then you created the epic speak and spell piece.
Guest:That is the first bit that ever put me on a comedy map.
Guest:If there was a map of comedy where there's ha-has.
Marc:There's the speak and spell piece.
Marc:That was the beginning of what Dane Cook, the kernel, the seed of Cook.
Guest:We call that the beginning of the novelty era.
Guest:You know, do you remember when jokes and, you know, all the youthful enthusiasm that went into like those all those jokes were like things that I thought of an eighth grade.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I was like, if I ever do comedy, this is going to be fun.
Guest:This is hopefully going to be funny, but not funny for years and years to come, like funny for a minute.
Guest:And then I I'm going to move on.
Marc:Well, how did you build that?
Marc:Like, when you were in high school, like, I'm trying to figure out, you know, when you became this social, when you developed your momentum.
Marc:Because I'm assuming that you were not always charismatic.
Marc:Did you play sports?
Guest:I did not.
Guest:And were you awkward?
Guest:Let me tell you this.
Guest:I did try, again, for my father.
Guest:A lot of stuff's going to come back to George Cook, my dad.
Guest:Big sports, athletic, broadcasting guy.
Marc:So your dad was the great Santini.
Guest:He was a big personality, and he was a great promoter, which is something that I definitely wanted.
Guest:What do you mean he promoted?
Guest:What did he promote?
Guest:Self-promotion, his businesses, lumber companies, window businesses.
Guest:Was he the guy on TV going, I'm just... Nobody created the ad, and he painted his own signs, and he loved, loved the political building of, like, you're going to meet the neighbors where the new business is.
Guest:You're going to create your own logo and slogans, and that was my dad's.
Marc:So now you had how many, you had five sisters?
Marc:Five sisters and a half brother.
Marc:And a half brother.
Marc:Now, so everyone's in the house.
Marc:Is this a situation where dad's home and I'm just like, what's dad need?
Guest:Dad's not home because he's alcoholic.
Guest:And in between seventh and eighth grade, we had a vote in my house to ask him to leave.
Guest:So if I asked him to leave, we meant the police would come and take him someplace and he would not be able to come back.
Marc:What were the manifestations of his alcoholism?
Marc:Was he abusive?
Marc:Was he screaming?
Marc:Was he just like drunk and passed out?
Guest:He was absolutely... He had a... My mother used to sleep with one foot on the floor...
Guest:ready to jump up because he was so out of it when he drank that like my little sister Courtney she was a baby at the time he would come in and like lay down on top of her not knowing what bed he was in he was just an idiot drunk well at least it was just for sleeping it yes okay but or he'd wake me in the middle of the night and sit down and he'd drink beers in front of me and like just tell me shit
Marc:So he had no boundaries.
Marc:He was a blackout drinker.
Guest:Yeah, he'd piss on neighbor's lawns.
Guest:Piss on himself.
Guest:Yeah, just he didn't think.
Guest:He was a brilliant guy who never pursued his love, sports.
Guest:Again, a lot of stuff is going to come back to that.
Guest:And was angry.
Guest:Because he just never had the right stuff to get it done.
Guest:Was he physically abusive?
Guest:He was a little bit.
Guest:But that's kind of when we were like, we got to nix this.
Guest:We got to get this guy.
Marc:So you're in eighth grade.
Guest:I will tell you an incident, though, that I've never talked about.
Guest:I'm trying to write a book, which is so fucking hard, by the way.
Marc:Do you have the deal in place?
Guest:I had a deal and I let it go to take my time and do what I wanted.
Guest:A real deal.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:It was like three years ago.
Guest:I gave the money back and said, I can't whip this up.
Guest:I need to like really take the time.
Guest:But I'm starting to get to that stuff.
Guest:Right.
Guest:And the thing was, there was a night when my dad and my sister Kelly, they didn't get along.
Guest:Right.
Guest:It was bad blood from the beginning.
Guest:And one night, I'm in bed, and my stepbrother's in the trundle bed next to me.
Guest:And all of a sudden, the door busts open, and everybody falls into the room, Sister Kelly, Mom, Dad, on to Daryl, my brother, and I'm sitting there, and there's a knife, and my dad's holding the blade, and my sister's holding the knife, and my brother's grabbing my sister's hair, and just...
Guest:Flesh knife screaming all around me where my sister Kelly had snapped and was so sick of his demented BS that she was going to stab him.
Guest:So your sister had the knife.
Guest:So she went violent.
Guest:My dad didn't.
Guest:But he pushed her by being just like obnoxious.
Guest:Truly Mark.
Guest:drove us crazy.
Guest:Why was she so mad at him?
Guest:Because he came in one night and he was like, how many times do I need to tell you to turn off this light when you're not in this room?
Guest:And he punched her light bulb out.
Guest:He punched the light bulb.
Guest:He was like, if you're not going to turn it off, then that's how it's going to happen.
Guest:And she went and grabbed a knife.
Guest:And next thing you know, we were having the family birthday party in a fit of rage in my room.
Guest:It was after that that he left.
Guest:We got together and decided.
Guest:So you grew up in complete chaos.
Guest:Now...
Guest:on to some degree emotional a lot of chaos there but i don't think i would have been able to do comedy or started doing stand-up comedy when i did if my dad had not been kicked out at that point because he was starting to get so dominant especially me i'm his only son i'm not playing sports yeah he wants me to i've got an athletic build but i'm so shy yeah that when i try out for foot i try for football yeah i got hit
Guest:I got knocked into West Side Story, basically.
Guest:I got fucking hit into theater class.
Guest:And that was it.
Guest:And he knew I wasn't going to pursue it.
Guest:So there was like, you could see that there was going to be some battles in the house.
Marc:So you were dancing in junior high?
Guest:I was step ball changing right into your heart, man.
Guest:Yeah?
Guest:Yeah, I was a song and dance man.
Guest:Cole Porter plays, Anything Goes, Grease, Danny Zuko, you name it, I did it.
Marc:When you did that, did your father resist it?
Marc:I mean, it must have been relieving on some level.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:he's he didn't get it for a lot of years yeah he didn't get it and then right around 90 when i did letterman 95 96 he kind of was like he stopped calling asking me to come work at the golf course with him i was like dad this is going to be kind of like a a thing that i do and die trying he worked at a golf course yeah he loved golf so we worked at one
Marc:And that's where he ended up after the whole arc of his alcoholism and life.
Marc:Is he sober now?
Guest:He passed away three years ago.
Guest:I think I knew that.
Guest:I apologize.
Guest:Sorry to hear that.
Guest:That's okay.
Guest:I didn't murder him.
Guest:What did you do?
Guest:I strangled him to death.
Guest:Finally.
Guest:With my bits.
Guest:All the ones that I'd written about him.
Marc:Well, I think it does have that effect, though.
Marc:My father likes the attention, despite the fact that some of the things I say about him are negative.
Marc:Sure.
Marc:Did yours?
Guest:He didn't get it at first.
Guest:You know, when I would talk about I used to say my dad was so drunk that he'd come home and say, don't mess with me because I've been around the block a couple of times, pal.
Guest:I've been around the block.
Guest:And I go, that's because you're too fucking drunk to find the house.
Guest:And so he didn't he didn't care for that at first.
Guest:But then he, I don't know.
Guest:Like, as time went on, we can get to that.
Guest:But, you know, he started to get it.
Marc:Yeah, I think eventually they want to have a relationship with you somehow.
Guest:I had that.
Guest:I had, before he passed away, cancer.
Guest:We had, like, five really strong years.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And, like, where we understood each other.
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:Went to the Red Sox World Series together and like, you know, shadow boxed together.
Guest:Just did bullshit.
Guest:Played some ball.
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:Shot around.
Guest:Getting back to like when I first got out of high school and started doing stand-up, it was really like, okay...
Guest:I'm at open mics.
Guest:I'm at catch for a little bit until I quickly realized that style of comedian didn't care for maybe what I was doing.
Guest:There was a lot of the alternative guys.
Marc:But it was an alternative then.
Marc:I mean, there's a lot of people bombing late at night.
Marc:I mean, there were plenty of cats going through there that were.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:But the few lead cats were certainly not interested in what I was doing.
Guest:So I started doing Knicks.
Marc:Yeah, I did those rooms when I was younger, too.
Marc:But you felt the tension at catch already?
Guest:Immediately.
Marc:Really?
Marc:In 1991?
Guest:The minute I started stand-up, I felt like I was the guy who showed up to a party that I'm not quite sure if I'm invited.
Guest:And you're walking around uncomfortably in the living room all night going like, should I leave?
Guest:Should I stay?
Guest:It was tough for me right off the bat.
Guest:And now, though, I know that a lot of it was me because I had so much fear that I think I probably projected a lot of what I thought people were thinking about me.
Yeah.
Marc:Well, but yeah, but like, but something has happened.
Marc:I mean, over time, I don't quite understand it.
Marc:I mean, I never, you know, I, I never was personally angry at you for, for, for who you were.
Marc:I mean, but like there was this period there where it was just like, you know, everybody was like, fuck Dane Cook, fuck Dane Cook.
Marc:I mean, me too.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:But, but where the, why do you think that happened?
Guest:well i mean honestly i mean this is before stealing chronological okay well because we can get up to that and that'll be an interesting uh because it happened before that the fuck dang cook stuff happened before you were accused or stealing when i was in boston yeah and i was doing like dick doherty rooms and billy down stuff and you're insecure man you better get on stage
Guest:Dane, you're very funny.
Guest:You have to set up chairs if you want to perform here.
Marc:Oh, shit, yeah.
Guest:All right, so you're Dick Dougherty's comedy vault.
Guest:When I'm at the vault and 15 other rooms of his and you name it, whatever little haunts or Chinese food restaurants or laundromats would take me.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:I was realizing that the guys that inspired me, Martin Short, John Ritter, Steve Martin, I love big personalities.
Guest:I love theater.
Guest:Absurdist.
Guest:Bill Cosby himself, major impact on me.
Guest:And I was an optimistic kid, and I didn't want to live in darkness.
Guest:I wasn't like a dark, you know, didn't drink, didn't do drugs, didn't hang around with an element.
Guest:Just real fantastical, imaginative character.
Guest:creative guy but nothing caused that because you do at times have the energy of a motivational speaker there was nothing that wired you that way there wasn't some here's where that came from though kevin nox uh noxie don gavin steve sweeney the kevin meanies all these guys martin shorts snl doing ed grimly john ritter anything he did so all comedy there was no part of you you never went to a teen counselor that said you know be optimistic you never went to a shrink that said that
Marc:I took a scrimshaw class once.
Marc:That'll do it.
Marc:Carving into bone.
Marc:Really?
Marc:There was nothing like that, though.
Marc:Because one thing that's enviable about you and probably is at the core of some of the contempt is just the blind confidence of what you present.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:And and and I think people read that as arrogance.
Marc:But I always read into it that like I thought that one of the reasons people resonate with you is because you're just having a good time.
Marc:Right.
Marc:And there seems to be it seems you seem to be excited about something and you have a contagious excitement.
Marc:Sure.
Marc:So, but that's just natural.
Marc:That wasn't a decision.
Marc:Like, I'm not going to be dark guy.
Guest:No, no, no, no.
Guest:It was not a put on.
Guest:The moment my foot hit it, fearful in life, maybe like that offstage brooding and wondering.
Guest:But the minute I stepped on stage, it was like I felt like that's the only place that I really belong.
Guest:That's your high.
Guest:And I could be happy there.
Guest:I wasn't going to – I could just be myself and share –
Guest:these big ideas and imaginative creative ideas without people, without having to explain myself with the social anxiety I had with a one-on-one conversation.
Guest:It was like, I could tell you whatever I wanted, get laughs, you know, move people.
Guest:But offstage doing that one-on-one was like, uh, one of the most difficult things that you can imagine.
Marc:Right now.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:So you're going, you're doing Dick's comedy vault.
Marc:You're doing Nick's, you're doing all this stuff.
Marc:Where, where's the contempt start?
Guest:Uh,
Guest:Well, you know, I knew that I had to leave Boston when some of the guys that I would be featuring for didn't want me to feature anymore because I was a strong middle and I was also, you know.
Marc:Yeah, you're a headliner's nightmare.
Marc:He's going to close with the speak and spell thing.
Marc:He's going to make a mess of the room.
Marc:I'm not going to be able to follow it.
Guest:And I didn't even have a lot of written material.
Guest:I had a lot of like manic, you know, impressions and like whatever I could do to get a laugh.
Marc:Well, that's most of it.
Guest:Whatever you could do to get a laugh.
Guest:Whatever I could do to get a laugh at the beginning.
Marc:And and most but mostly a lot of what you do is momentum.
Marc:I mean, a lot of what you do is explosive.
Marc:I mean, it doesn't you know, you get it to a level.
Guest:Sure.
Marc:I mean, yeah, look, I'm not I'm not criticizing you.
Marc:I you know, that's your style.
Marc:But it is like if you get people worked up like that, I could see why a headliner would be like, yeah, fucking.
Guest:Yeah, and at the beginning it was all of that.
Guest:It was all style, no substance.
Guest:It was very little in terms of using language to paint any pictures.
Guest:It was just me up there just... Blasting.
Guest:Yeah, exactly, blasting away.
Guest:And so when I started kind of road gigging and realizing that I can headline colleges, I was getting a lot of money, I thought I should be in New York because then I could do like a thousand SUNY schools and I can be like right in the middle of...
Guest:what it is to be a comedian New York City when I got there I didn't realize how I remember when I went up to the comic strip the first night just to start to walk into clubs and you see all those pictures on the wall of all these guys that you admire and many that you've never even seen of before but you're like these guys were here and doing it and you feel like I'm never going to get it done here I feel like I remember standing there being like what right do I have to even be here and
Guest:But that also drove me to want to... You really have that kind of insecurity?
Guest:Deeply, yeah.
Guest:Seriously?
Guest:Not as much today because I'm very comfortable with myself.
Guest:I'm balanced.
Marc:Because you always had a lot of swagger.
Marc:And granted, I did too at some point in my life.
Marc:And I knew that I was insecure.
Marc:But you were really frightened?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I didn't have any mojo.
Guest:I didn't have a thing with chicks.
Guest:I wasn't popular in school.
Guest:I never had a clique or a group.
Guest:I never felt like anybody really wanted me in their gang.
Marc:But you could pass in all of them, right?
Marc:I mean, most comics are fairly diplomatic.
Marc:I mean, could you move within them?
Marc:You weren't like some freak, like, you know, there's Dane Cook.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:It was tough for me, man.
Guest:In New York, when we first were kind of in whatever circle passing and whatever clubs we were in, for me, it was a constant state of I don't feel like I belong here.
Marc:But you maintained a certain aloofness.
Marc:That was the way it read.
Marc:No, but I mean even socializing that you were so big on stage and it was hard for people not to see you as cocky.
Marc:And you were cocky.
Guest:A little.
Guest:To survive in New York City.
Guest:All right.
Marc:No, but I mean just in social events.
Guest:You don't find... In social events, but I was never social because I would try to hang with these guys.
Guest:Which can be read as... Yeah.
Guest:But here's the thing.
Guest:I would leave because I felt so uncomfortable, but I knew years later that that did me a disservice, that people didn't even know, like, I should just sit and take the ball busting and whatever comes at me because then maybe you guys would go...
Guest:oh we get him but instead it came across as narcissistic or arrogant or fucking megalomaniac or whatever you guys were saying because i'd put my i'd put my hat down yeah and i'd bail right and it was also like i i came out of boston with these guys that were like that were so big and they were performing in front of nicks 500 people that's right yeah i get that and so when i brought that to new york that was not what was going on in new york no it was like 50 people and 100 people
Guest:but it was a lot of guys wanting to be derivative of a tell and there was a lot of guys except for maybe like brewer who i would do shows with well he's similar to you i felt like most of what i was up against were guys that were like oh shit what is what is he doing what is this clown routine what is this over the top right physicality so my style didn't gel right where'd you get all those words
Marc:The words that you just listed would be the words that would be narcissistic, megalomaniacal.
Marc:What was the other one?
Marc:I love vernacular, man.
Guest:I'm a wordsmith.
Marc:I know words.
Marc:Right, but if I was to say that you just wrote a list of the words that people use to describe you, and you just popped them out of your head,
Guest:No, I mean, over the years, these are things that people said.
Marc:Those are the words.
Guest:But with me trying to understand where it came from, me trying to really go, is that because of people knowing me?
Guest:You don't know me.
Guest:You and I have never had a real conversation.
Guest:No, I've never talked to you ever.
Guest:But I made up a belief of who you were based on...
Guest:just the guy that passed me and the guy that I saw on stage.
Guest:And I never would have given you more of a shot because, well, A, because I was afraid to, but because I would have figured we wouldn't meet in the middle.
Marc:Yeah, but do you, but my curiosity is whatever I made up for you was that there had to be some, like, I know someone with as big a charisma as you have, and the amount of flack that you get, that you've gotta be pretty lonely in the middle of all that shit.
Marc:And that like in that, you know, I just don't know that you have many friends.
Marc:So whatever I was going to think of you thinking all this swagger, all this money that you're pretty insulated in yourself somehow, because in the middle of all that spinning around and strutting and and and and performing that, you know, I can't.
Marc:It must be sort of quiet in there.
Guest:I've met Steve Martin.
Guest:Steve Martin was my number one hero.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:How'd that go?
Guest:I had dinner with Steve Martin two months ago.
Guest:I heard everything about Steve Martin, and I've read everything about Steve Martin, New Yorker.
Guest:I know everything about Steve Martin.
Guest:The Steve Martin I met is so fucking not Steve Martin.
Guest:He's very quiet and sort of almost sad.
Guest:Exactly.
Guest:Heavy-hearted.
Guest:But...
Marc:What was that conversation like?
Guest:Did you guys cry?
Guest:It was incredible.
Guest:We held each other like only men who have an understanding can.
Guest:But meeting him, I felt like maybe for the first time, and I'm 38, I finally was like, wow.
Guest:Part of even why I want to sit down with you and kind of travel in different circles was people don't really know me.
Guest:They think they know me based on persona, on TV, on Jimmy Kimmel's, on stage.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:But sitting with him and having this conversation over a couple of hours...
Guest:And I'd read Born Standing Up and everything else.
Guest:I was like, wow, man, you don't know somebody until you feel somebody look you right in the eyes and go, this is what I'm about.
Guest:And I'm not about 95% of the shit that people want to think that I'm about.
Guest:Some of it's laughable.
Guest:Some of it's depressing.
Guest:And some of it is just at the point now where I'm like, you know what?
Guest:This needs to be like rectified and understood.
Guest:Well, how come you don't have any close friends?
Guest:I have tons of close friends.
Guest:Do you?
Guest:They're just not all comedians.
Guest:They're normal, regular people.
Guest:Where are they?
Guest:I like New Englanders, a lot of people back on the East Coast.
Guest:But I have the guys that I came up with.
Guest:Bill Burr and I started together, Patrice O'Neill, Bobby Kelly.
Guest:You guys still hang out?
Marc:He's my best friend.
Marc:I know they all talk highly of you.
Guest:I just drummed with Bill Burr a couple of weeks ago and then hung out at his spot out here.
Guest:I love Bill Burr.
Guest:Patrice I don't hang with like I used to, and that bums me out.
Guest:He's one of the best ever.
Guest:He is one of the best ever.
Guest:But Bobby Kelly, Aldel Benny has been my friend since... So you got a lot of close friends.
Marc:You got guys you hang out with every week?
Marc:I do, yeah.
Marc:That's good.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So that's healthy.
Marc:So you seem to be a healthy guy in that way.
Marc:I am.
Marc:I'm a very healthy, centered person.
Marc:Why so many people thought you were horrible?
Marc:Why do you think that is?
Guest:I'm just curious.
Guest:Picking one.
Guest:Let's pick one thing.
Guest:One thing that happened was...
Guest:When 2001, when the Comedy Central special first aired, that was really when people started to know who I was.
Guest:It was the one where I wore a black tank top.
Guest:I ripped it off at the end.
Guest:I threw it into the audience.
Guest:I'm pouring water on myself.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I thought they'd air that four times like most people.
Guest:Right.
Guest:You know, you think, I hope that I can get some eyes on this and maybe it'll help me sell out a gig at like Rascals.
Marc:Yeah.
Yeah.
Guest:I had no clue that was going to be highly rated and air every night for two years straight.
Guest:It was a blessing because it helped build the fan base that I have today.
Guest:But the curse was, this is all people know of me.
Guest:I did this literally to be like, I'm just going to do some crazy shit and not wear a bowling shirt and Chuckie's like 90% of the other guys.
Guest:So I stand out.
Guest:And it started to build a kind of a...
Guest:a perspective that people had on my performance and in my style of comedy when that started to happen and all the djs around the country like this guy's the best man check him out check him out check him out now you and 10 other comics that are fucking on the road wailing away trying to do your thing what's the first question that every dj asks you every time why aren't you doing what dane cook does yeah
Guest:I didn't get that.
Guest:I knew the minute that started happening that I'm doomed.
Guest:In a few years, the pendulum was going to swing and smash me in the face.
Guest:Resentment.
Guest:One piece of the pie.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I never thought...
Guest:I never sat and said, I need to start putting fingers in every hole in dams as it's starting to break.
Guest:And it will.
Guest:Again, forgetting about just comedians that I admired, I read about all my favorite musicians.
Guest:I read about all these actors that I... And there's always that page in the memoir where it's like, here's where everything turned to shit.
Guest:Here's where, you know... But is that really happening, though?
Guest:I mean... Dude, yes.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Let me tell you something, man.
Guest:Three years ago, my mom got cancer.
Guest:She called me up at the peak of my career professionally.
Guest:She said, I'm dying.
Guest:She's my best friend in the world.
Guest:She was my compass.
Guest:Within seven months, I watch her languish, get really in a lot of pain.
Guest:I got hospice there.
Guest:I'm trying to balance being in this career that I love creating, trying to already understand why there's so much backlash, more than what I anticipated.
Guest:Just take care of my mother.
Guest:She dies.
Guest:A week later, I sit down with my dad.
Guest:I literally put my hand on his knee.
Guest:I'm like, Pop, don't go anywhere.
Guest:And for the first time in my life, I see tears in my dad's eyes.
Guest:And he goes, I have cancer.
Guest:and i have six months to live i watched my mom and dad die of cancer in front of me in a year do you think i give a fuck what people say about me away from that do you really think that i care about what people say after you live through something like that and you take care of two people i fought to have a relationship with my dad that's all i worked on for years i was just trying to figure this guy out right i loved my mom
Guest:She wanted to see everything that I did come true.
Guest:Most of what I did was because my mom wanted to see that.
Guest:Okay, so you're saying this is heavy stuff.
Guest:When you go through that, nothing else after that is important to you.
Guest:And where my life is now and the balance that I have, I don't think about that, man.
Guest:I don't think about the rumor and innuendo now the way I used to.
Marc:But I mean, also, I understand that.
Guest:I know who my fans are.
Marc:Well, that's what I was just going to say.
Marc:Right.
Marc:I mean, it seemed that, you know, from the very beginning in that in all that fury over my space and your need to to connect with your fans on an intimate level and your ability to maintain it.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And what you did to connect with them, even if it was if it wasn't exactly you, maybe a member of your family was at least connected with me.
Marc:OK.
Marc:but uh but i think that despite what anyone thought about that if anyone resented that or thought like you know fuck him i think comics are innately insecure and i still hear guys say like i'm not gonna get on facebook is that you really invented the model by which comics will judge how to social network you know it's not just myspace anymore but i think you were the first guy to see success in that and it really turned everybody around so that's the good side of that
Marc:So you're saying to me that you find enough love in those fans that you do have to stop you from acknowledging or responding to the haters.
Guest:Exactly.
Guest:I truly never wanted to respond or acknowledge the haters.
Marc:But you're so comfortable in your craft and what you do and how you're doing it that you never doubt yourself or listen to that?
Guest:I doubt, but I try not to allow other people to instill doubt in me.
Guest:But me personally, yeah, every day.
Guest:So none of that has hurt your feelings?
Guest:None of the things that people have said about me, I wouldn't say none of it has hurt my feelings.
Guest:Yeah, it has hurt my feelings.
Guest:Things have gotten to me.
Guest:I even talked about it on stage in my last tour about a fan letter I got that said, your mom and dad died of cancer to get away from your shitty comedy.
Guest:And I did a whole bit about it to let people know and to understand that, yes, I found even humor in the most.
Marc:And then what was the end of that bit?
Guest:didn't he write you another letter yes a year later i got another email from anonymous yahoo.com yeah uh basically you know uh it's funny because that's it's actually two things that happened in one one was it was from an anonymous fan and the other one and i'm not going to name his name but it was from a comedian who is pretty vocal about not uh being a fan of mine where he basically wrote me he said i'm sorry to hear about your mom
Guest:Everything else, it's just a game, and it's not really what I truly feel about you.
Marc:But he wrote to say he was sorry you lost your mom, right?
Guest:We were on the road years back.
Guest:He remembered me talking about her and reached out.
Marc:But the way the bit ends on the special is that the guy wrote back to apologize, and he had a change of heart, right?
Marc:True.
Guest:And then what'd you do on stage?
Guest:I wrote the guy back and I basically said something like, I'm paraphrasing, of course, but, you know, I hope your father dies of a brain tumor, you drunk, obnoxious, hypocritical fuck.
Marc:Right, so you didn't accept his apology and you didn't forgive him.
Guest:I did.
Guest:There's a tag, but the tag is not as funny when I wrote back and I said, that was a joke, dude.
Guest:I appreciate that.
Guest:You did say it.
Guest:Yeah, I accepted it and I was like... But for the sake of the joke, you said, fuck you.
Guest:Yeah, because what...
Guest:The fuck you is the big laugh and applause, and you're not going to go, oh, by the way.
Guest:That's going to muddle things up.
Guest:The other part is the heart, Dane.
Guest:I know, but that can go in a book or in this conversation, but we're not looking necessarily for a lot of heart.
Guest:We're looking to get big laughs.
Marc:But I think some people are looking for heart from you because I find that when I talk to people that the reason the attitude is against you is people think you're an asshole.
Marc:I don't see how that... You don't act like an asshole sometimes?
Marc:You're not dismissive or self-centered or you may go too far on stage and hurt someone's feelings?
Guest:Listen, what I do on stage and how that affects people's feelings towards me, if you're offended by a persona and a performance, I mean, again, it's me, but you know...
Guest:The light switches on, the enhanced entertainment.
Guest:I don't know what to do with that.
Guest:If you have a problem with me personally because of something that's happened offstage, we can talk about that.
Guest:Right.
Guest:But, man, if I spoke to every person that had an issue with me because of comedy...
Marc:Who the fuck knows where we'd be?
Marc:What do you find that the criticism really is?
Marc:Because I can't quite figure it out.
Marc:I mean, there's been plenty of people that don't have punchlines.
Guest:I don't feel like the criticism exists as much as it was at the height of the white hot spotlight of whatever was Time Magazine and all that a few years ago.
Guest:I don't get it as much today.
Marc:I just never understood how you were the antichrist of comedy.
Marc:I didn't understand that.
Marc:I don't think I was even ever that.
Marc:No, but I mean, you were represented something.
Marc:I mean, I just don't I never quite understood it.
Marc:I was not on that bandwagon.
Marc:And then like, you know, the tides got worse when you got called out for the stealing of Louis C.K.
Marc:Right.
Marc:And what happened with that?
Marc:Did you did you credit him as a writer on the first CD?
Marc:I know.
Guest:No.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:I didn't credit Louis C.K.
Guest:because I never stole anything from Louis C.K.
Guest:Listen, I listened to your interview with Carlos Mencia.
Guest:Carlos Mencia is obviously very guilty of taking words verbatim and taking them from people.
Guest:Whatever he has copped to, I watched I Am Comic or something the other than I Am A Comic.
Guest:Yeah, right, right.
Guest:And even, I don't know what that rant was, but...
Guest:I would watch him sometimes, literally, and listen to that interview and go, how can I really convey to people so that they understand that I've never stolen anything in my life, Mark?
Guest:If you're going to look at a person and accuse them of something like that, you look at my legacy.
Guest:I'm not a thief in life.
Guest:I don't steal anything.
Guest:I don't have police records.
Guest:I've never taken anything.
Guest:Even my close friends, I don't know how well you know Bobby Kelly's, or if you talk to guys like that who have known me the longest, you know...
Guest:They're going to look at you.
Guest:They're going to go, man, you're crazy to think that Dane Cook steals.
Marc:Well, no, I don't think that, like, anyone says that you were a pathological stealer.
Marc:I mean, the only things I've heard about, really, were the Louis thing, which you guys dealt with.
Marc:And, you know, whether, I mean, there are people that don't steal.
Marc:They just do.
Marc:It just happens.
Marc:I realize that.
Guest:The Robin Williams of the world who absorb.
Guest:Right.
Guest:I mean, you know, but I don't even.
Guest:In essence, though, we're talking about, in my lifetime, in 20 years of stand-up,
Guest:We're talking about four concepts, three things that we could talk about with Louie and I, and a Joe Rogan thing that happened in 97.
Guest:Right, that's it.
Guest:Out of all the material I've ever recorded and all the bits that you've ever seen me do, we're talking about four kind of concepts.
Guest:We're not talking about verbatim.
Guest:We're not talking about things lifted and manipulated.
Guest:Dude, that's the same punchline.
Marc:There's none of that.
Marc:I heard that you once accused someone of stealing your essence.
Marc:Yeah, Steve Byrne.
Guest:Now, what does that mean exactly?
Guest:Steve Byrne.
Guest:I understand it, actually.
Guest:It's so funny because this is the only time I have ever called somebody or said I need to talk to you about something is Steve Byrne, who I think is a very talented guy.
Guest:But essence is an interesting word.
Guest:It is an interesting word.
Guest:And when we had that conversation, which I thought was a private conversation, which I thought was just Steve and I, I remember I called Steve.
Guest:I said, listen, can we, because a bunch of people around LA were saying, wow, man, he's like, he's doing you.
Guest:It's like watching you, the cadence, the tempo, the little tricks and stuff that we all have, the little, the ums or the, you know, whatever it is that you put together to make your...
Guest:you know your rhythms so and then just general like POV stuff just the way he was you know I think I have a kind of a unique perspective on the way I approach a joke or a story or routine and so I called him I said you know will you come over and you know talk to me about this I remember we came over essence yeah
Guest:Go ahead.
Guest:That's not the way the conversation went.
Guest:All right, all right.
Guest:One piece of maybe a two-hour conversation that I had with him.
Guest:And the thing that was strange about the conversation was it was a great conversation.
Guest:It wasn't me sitting there saying, dude, you're doing this and you're taking... It was not.
Guest:We sat on my porch.
Guest:We sat on the front stoop of this building that I was living in for about two hours.
Guest:We talked about what he was doing.
Guest:And you know what?
Guest:Since...
Guest:i never went out and started you know blogging or or one of those people that when somebody says something about me that i know is getting around it's like i'm gonna start telling what really happened you know the same with the louis stuff not everybody knows that whole story there's more to like that back and forth than what people realize but you but he chose you both chose to keep it yeah but we sat there and we talked about it and i finally said you know and i did say to him i go steve
Guest:But I didn't go like this.
Guest:You are stealing my essence.
Guest:I probably said, you know, Steve, it's like you're not being you.
Guest:It's like you're being me.
Guest:It's like you're trying to act like me, dress like me.
Guest:And he even admitted to me at that time in his life, you know what?
Guest:I'm not where I want to be.
Guest:Even my own family's looking at me saying...
Guest:You know, this isn't you.
Guest:There's too much you like Dane.
Guest:No, not that.
Guest:No.
Guest:But just that he wasn't being Steve.
Guest:Right, right.
Guest:By the end of the conversation, I remember I shook his hand.
Guest:I said, you know what, Steve?
Guest:I like you.
Guest:I think that you're really talented.
Guest:And I go, and I know that everybody goes through these times where we get a little bit lost and try to figure out what the fuck we are on stage.
Guest:i want to be a friend to you i want to like i'd rather be closer to you than feel like we're awkward and now we're going to see each other in clubs and it's weird i thought we walked away from that conversation i remember i walked into my girlfriend i go that's one of the best conversations i've ever had and comics have these conversations every night there's a comic somewhere going dude we have the same
Guest:No, I know.
Marc:I'm sorry.
Guest:You want so badly, Mark.
Guest:I like that.
Marc:I like the line.
Guest:And I know your humor, and I appreciate it, and I know that's something you want to be able to... I get it.
Guest:You want Darth Vader to be Darth Vader.
Guest:You don't want her to be Anakin.
Guest:No, I like that.
Guest:And you want me to be Darth Vader.
Marc:No, I don't.
Marc:But the mask is off, and I'm letting you know that... No, I know the mask isn't completely off, but I like... But it is.
Marc:I like stealing your assets.
Marc:I do.
Marc:I like that.
Marc:And I'm glad that you...
Marc:It's poetic.
Marc:I understand it.
Marc:I call it a drive shaft.
Marc:You see, you're thinking I'm attacking you or not.
Marc:But I can tell when someone takes someone's drive shaft.
Marc:Like you said, there's a lot of people doing a tell.
Marc:There's a lot of people doing Hedberg.
Marc:There's a lot of people doing Todd Berry.
Guest:Exactly.
Guest:And that's what I was getting across.
Marc:I was just enjoying the poetry of it.
Guest:But I do call it a drive shaft.
Guest:You know what?
Guest:That's okay.
Guest:I can have drive shaft?
Guest:You can have Essence.
Guest:Enjoy.
Guest:Yes.
Marc:I'll take drive shaft.
Marc:Or delivery system.
Marc:I like as well.
Marc:Essence is the same thing.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:You like that?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Fine.
Marc:We're just arguing over poetry.
Marc:Can't a guy appreciate another guy's poetry?
Marc:You can't.
Guest:I've never used that terminology except for that conversation, but yes, I can hear it.
Marc:And it became, it was so good, it had to get out.
Marc:I didn't hear it from Steve Byrne, but the idea of you saying someone's stealing your asses, it was so good, it had to be talked about.
Guest:I can understand the way when you turn it into a soundbite, it is hilarious.
Guest:And if I heard it, I'd probably fuck around with it, too.
Guest:Well, you do kind of conjure up pictures of you wherever you are up in the hills, and you summon Steve.
Guest:You're like, you have stolen my essence.
Guest:Give it back.
Guest:All right.
Guest:If that's what you want to... If that really is what you want to believe, if that's what it conjures up, then... Here's what I pictured.
Guest:I pictured you looking out of your house.
Guest:Come over to my house tonight.
Guest:All right.
Guest:Come see where I live.
Guest:Don't you have a view?
Guest:Come see that's not a lair in some... But you have a view, right?
Marc:I do.
Marc:Okay, so I was picturing you looking out over Los Angeles.
Guest:At that time, I did not live there.
Marc:Oh, but you're like, you know, with your robe on going, someone has taken my essence.
Marc:I can feel it in the forest.
Marc:That's how I pictured it.
Marc:All right.
Guest:Come on.
Guest:That's what makes you happy.
Guest:Come on.
Guest:I'm a jeans and t-shirt guy.
Guest:I'm not big into fucking robes and wizardry.
Marc:A dark robe.
Marc:No wizardry.
Guest:No.
Marc:But you have the personality of a wizard.
Marc:You could stand on a mountain with a scepter and summon wind.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:So you're getting a little defensive.
Marc:There's no reason to.
Guest:I'm not defensive.
Guest:I hear I'm having a good time.
Guest:I'm trying to understand how you perceive me.
Guest:And so I'm trying to see what you see.
Marc:I perceive you as a guy that is very ambitious, very in control of his skill set, is creative, loves attention, is decent to his fans, has a lot of them.
Marc:I do think that you, out of necessity, have a blind spot.
Marc:In terms of how people really see you because you choose to turn shit off.
Marc:I think you have the focus of a motivational speaker and it's very engaging.
Marc:It's electrifying.
Marc:I felt it over the phone.
Marc:What else do I also think?
Marc:I think you're a bit of a control freak.
Marc:And that when things aren't going your way, you must be a real motherfucker.
Marc:Do you have any water?
Guest:I need one right now.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:I am very ambitious.
Guest:I'm absolutely a big dreamer.
Guest:I love creating.
Guest:But you're so wrong about being a motherfucker or whatever goes with that.
Guest:When you don't get what you want.
Guest:When I don't get what I want, I've always understood that I'm just not always gonna get what I want in this world.
Guest:I get it.
Guest:Seriously.
Marc:Yeah, man.
Marc:You've never thrown a temper tantrum.
Guest:Not where I make people feel badly about themselves.
Guest:I've gotten mad.
Guest:Yeah, I go home and I fucking get mad.
Guest:But I'm not an angry person.
Guest:I don't lash out.
Guest:I don't go home and kick the dog.
Guest:I'm not one of those people.
Guest:I'm the furthest thing from a motherfucker.
Guest:If anything, what I've always really wanted and why I did things like tourgasm and stuff was like...
Guest:I just want to feel part of a gang.
Guest:I want to feel part of an ensemble of people.
Guest:That's why it's like people go, why do you like to do movies versus stand-up?
Guest:I said, I always love stand-up more.
Guest:But I like when a director goes, this is what I need.
Guest:Here's what I'm trying to accomplish.
Guest:And then I get to work with a bunch of people that have their own ideas of where we're going.
Guest:And then we collectively get there together.
Guest:That actually makes me happier than feeling like I'm by myself.
Guest:I did what I did as hard as I did it alone for so many years so I wouldn't need to be alone anymore.
Guest:Oh, because you wanted to get friends.
Guest:Because I just wanted to feel like a part of a community.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:And I realized that it wasn't necessarily going to be comedy because comedy wasn't sports.
Guest:It wasn't like you beat your opponent and they go, hey, but you know what?
Guest:He deserves it.
Guest:It's a good game.
Guest:It wasn't going to be like that.
Guest:But it's not to say, Mark, that I didn't... I guess we're kind of painting it as like it's me-verse.
Guest:The people I love and admire in the comics that I came up with
Guest:wanting to emulate that i've had a chance to actually sit with sometimes or meet with they they get it and they've maybe been through things that you don't know until you've been to my level that you just don't get and what comes at you you don't know but chris rock knows and steve martin knows and bill cosby knows
Guest:About the failure part of it, about the people believing that you're a motherfucker because you want to be able to control a situation and say, you know what?
Guest:I know what's best because I'm the guy with the idea.
Guest:And what that means to somebody standing on the corner being told like, all right, you need to go do this.
Guest:And so when this stuff's coming at me and you're saying, you're a motherfucker, it's like, no, I'm determined.
Guest:And I want to be the foreman.
Guest:I do want to be like, I know how this building needs to be built.
Guest:And I know that I'm 20 years into a career that I want to be 80.
Guest:I've done every arena everywhere with 20,000 people.
Guest:A million people came out to my tour last year.
Guest:It was the first time I'd smiled since my folks passed away.
Guest:I just wanted to get out there and be happy, man, and make other people happy.
Guest:Uh, and so now that I'm back and really feeling healthy, it's like, I just want to, I just want to take them in different places.
Marc:So you want to set up a production organization.
Marc:So you're going to create a whole other thing that you're going to draw from the audience you have and build your, uh, and build your mountain.
Guest:Yeah, I mean, just... Because you're talking business now.
Marc:I mean, this is business.
Guest:Well, it's creative.
Guest:They dance together.
Guest:It's like, oh, I can think of an idea and put it down on paper, and if it's funny or moving, then the fans are happy.
Guest:So, yeah, it's the business of comedy.
Marc:That's right.
Marc:Were you always thinking along those lines?
Guest:Always.
Guest:You're like, how do I become a superstar?
Guest:No, it wasn't how can I be a superstar, but, you know, when I was hanging out with my pop once, I remember he was...
Guest:I remember telling him because I was helping him with a sign for a company that he was putting up.
Guest:And he was excited because the paints that he used were orange and white.
Guest:And he was like, look at the other window businesses.
Guest:Everybody else uses blue.
Guest:I'm going to stand out because I'm using orange.
Guest:And he had this thing about self-promotion.
Guest:He was so interested in finding new ways to attract people.
Guest:Now, once they're there, they might peek in and go, I'm not interested.
Guest:But nothing attracts a crowd like a crowd.
Guest:And that's the thing that I remember him stating to me early on.
Marc:Right.
Guest:And that and then in the same way you said at the beginning, you do anything necessary to get laughs at that time and anything I could to just get noticed so that people it's the it's those guys that, you know, maybe play the drums on the streets and then they're going to do a thing where they jump over people and they go, everybody line up, everybody.
Guest:And you get a whole crowd in New York and everyone stands around and.
Guest:You know, you wait for 20 minutes while they're, you know, trying to make a couple of bucks to, you know, maybe it's like, all right, there's people that hang out and go, is this worth it?
Guest:Those people are going to go, there's 10 other things I'd rather do.
Marc:You know, it seems that somehow or another that, you know, I know you listen to the Carlos episode and you're not the same animal as he is that, you know, that somehow or another you're weathering this storm of dissent.
Marc:And that somehow or another, even with the stealing accusations, you seem to be doing okay.
Marc:So do you feel that those things stuck or they didn't stick or what?
Guest:Definitely some of it sticks.
Guest:And what does that mean?
Guest:I mentioned like, you know, there's always going to be a Wikipedia entry somewhere that people's going to say, you know, this guy stole, he's a thief.
Marc:But what does it mean in the broader sense of, you know, because you know, in an industry that's like built,
Guest:on theft and stealing of ideas.
Guest:And, you know, we can name 10 names, but the, the Quentin Tarantinos who said, I lifted this whole thing or raps stars that everybody lifts, everybody steals.
Guest:There was a moment in my life.
Guest:I remember it was like, after I was going through all that stuff with my mom and pops, it was like, I just want to like, what the cleanse that I do, dude, I wish I fucking stole so I could say I stole those bits and
Guest:So I could just release something.
Guest:But because I didn't, and I can't, I'm not a liar.
Guest:I was like, I just need to, like, time will finally show through more things that I create.
Guest:I need to, 10 years from now, have five new hours that you and I can look at and go, yeah, that has nothing to do with.
Marc:And I'm sure you will do that.
Marc:But in the sense of, like, right now, was there a point where you're like, I'm just going to ride this out?
Marc:Because you kept it between the two of you.
Marc:Yeah, for the most part.
Marc:And I know some of that got out and he did some of it on stage, but he was pretty.
Marc:He took the high road in comparison to some people.
Marc:Louie did.
Marc:Right.
Marc:And you guys spoke.
Marc:But even once we emailed, we emailed.
Marc:OK, even once that had happened, you know, you at some point knew, like, I'm not going to be able to get rid of this.
Guest:Yeah, because Louie is a very, very well respected person.
Guest:incredible comedian who has a lot of uh fans and a lot of people that support him well what the fuck happened there was these three bits that were similar one bit was something that about naming your kid a crazy name that to be honest i remember that little bit but it's a steve martin bit
Guest:So, okay.
Guest:So you stole it from Steve Martin.
Guest:But I'm not saying, no.
Guest:And am I saying that Louie stole something from Steve Martin?
Guest:No.
Guest:I'm saying that it's an idea or a concept where Steve Martin's original.
Guest:I'm going to name my kid.
Guest:And then in 1992, I wrote a joke where I said, I'm going to name my kid nonstop flight from Boston to Los Angeles just to fuck him up for when he's trying to book travel plans for the rest of my life.
Marc:All right, so you're saying that because the nature of the absurdity of... Absurd, yes.
Marc:Louie's not even absurd anymore, but there was a time where he was more of an absurdist, that the influence could have trickled down, and absurdism is what it is.
Marc:Right.
Marc:That it's a roll of the dice.
Guest:Right.
Guest:Another concept where he's talking about, like, a guy getting hit on the bike, and I talk about the way you react to somebody, or, like, saying, like... Bad thing!
Marc:I remember that joke.
Guest:I mean...
Guest:Literally, I remember driving with my mother in Arlington, Massachusetts.
Guest:She's in the passenger seat, and she used to be one of those people that stepped on a fake pedal.
Guest:I mean, come on, man.
Guest:We're talking about these little, tiny, tic-tac-size concepts.
Guest:But it was that thing, Mark, where it was like, okay, I want to be able to look at this and go...
Guest:People who want to mention me in the name of, like, a Carlos.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I mean, that's a far cry.
Marc:No, I don't really think that.
Marc:No, I think you're right.
Marc:And I think that's one of the reasons why, you know, this stuff, it is what it is.
Marc:Like you said, it's going to stick, but, you know, it's not some sort of weird serial pattern of taking everything.
Guest:It fucked me up.
Guest:It fucked me up for a little bit at a time when I was already fucked up because of what I was dealing with.
Guest:I didn't say anything.
Guest:I didn't want to fight back.
Guest:I didn't know.
Guest:Like you said, oh, I'm a motherfucker.
Guest:A motherfucker would have been like every morning radio guy that I would have been out there going, let me tell you what this guy said or did or the side of the story that I didn't hear from Louie about, you know, maybe the way.
Guest:But I think what you were saying... I didn't want to... No, but I... It doesn't matter.
Guest:Because it's not he said, she said.
Guest:It doesn't matter.
Guest:What matters is what is out there now that's still perpetuated.
Guest:Now there's a place here, or even when I did Howard, where I can... You're hearing me say...
Guest:It has nothing to do with me.
Guest:I did not take those things.
Guest:And it sucks that they're similar, and I wish that they weren't.
Guest:I really do, so it would have nothing to do with me.
Guest:But it does, and all it makes me do, Mark, is want to work harder and create something original again that people look at and go, that's Danes.
Guest:Well, that seems to be happening a bit.
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:And and also, I appreciate you talking about it because, I mean, it wasn't, you know, it wasn't something that I was pressing to find.
Marc:But that when you get to a certain level that you're going to be taken down and that, you know, like, you know, my first instinct when you were comparing yourself to Chris Rock or to Steve Martin, you know, I was thinking, like, who the fuck does this guy think he is?
Marc:And I'm like, he's a guy that sells out Madison Square Garden.
Marc:I mean, that's who you are.
Marc:I mean, despite what anyone may think or whatever I may think of you sitting in my garage, these are sort of rarefied air that you're breathing and that, you know, the type of reaction you have to have and how you handle these things.
Marc:It has to be very calculated and very political.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And probably I probably made a lot of mistakes by not being as calculated a political earlier on when they did happen.
Guest:That was probably my biggest mistake is that I just said, oh, it'll just go away because I didn't think of myself the way people go to this guy's like, I don't I'm not the guy that thinks I'm Madison Square Garden center of everything.
Guest:The second my foot steps off that stage, I feel like a regular normal guy.
Guest:I still feel like the same kid in high school that just wanted to like be in Star Wars for the rest of my life.
Guest:There should have been more people around me, maybe even like yourself, who would say, you should speak to this.
Guest:Hire a publicist who can help you to go to the right sources so that people understand really what you're about.
Guest:They may still hate your comedy.
Guest:They still may go like, that guy's not funny.
Guest:He sucks.
Guest:That's okay.
Guest:But at least they'll understand and hear my perspective on it and know that...
Guest:I don't admire or look upon people that hack or take jokes in any positive way.
Guest:I don't run in those circles.
Guest:And I certainly don't want to be affiliated with that.
Guest:And I take a lot of pride in my original material.
Marc:Well, to be honest, I didn't find here that you... I think you thought I thought you were worse than you were.
Marc:I think that you thought I had a preconceived notion.
Guest:But I had a preconceived notion about you.
Guest:And despite listening to your show and enjoying your show...
Guest:regardless of like because i i remember meeting you and i i i thought that you were kind of rude and i thought that you were not very uh approachable and that's exactly the same feeling i had about you but i didn't you know look i didn't know that maybe you were i don't know you know you brought up alcohol maybe you were dealing with uh demons maybe you were had some you know things going on in your life that made you less susceptible to being open to people other than yourself yeah but but you described yourself as being exactly that
Guest:Right, but I came to you because I wanted to sit and really understand, Mark.
Guest:But what I'm saying is... Was I right about that guy?
Guest:And I know this is just like a sliver of getting to know somebody.
Marc:But you're the same guy.
Marc:You're the guy that wouldn't hang around.
Marc:You're the guy that walked out early.
Marc:You're the guy that intimidates people because of your energy.
Marc:But do you understand a little more why now?
Marc:Well, no, but I understand that we might have similar personalities at the core of this.
Marc:Fear.
Marc:But...
Guest:it was fear yeah but at that time well I guess that it's fear in in my in my sense too but like I you know I didn't have you pigeonholed in any way I I really didn't I I mean I understood what you did from your materials you put me in a place and I put you in a place psychologically I feel like and then the people that know you and respect you you would go and you would say I don't like him and here's why and you know what they respect you and they go with you
Marc:The only thing negative I ever said about you, ever, when anyone brings you up, is that like I say, that guy doesn't really bother me.
Marc:I don't know why everyone's angry at him.
Marc:He doesn't really bother me.
Marc:He's an empty vessel full of fuel.
Guest:And people would come to me and say, hey, do you ever bump into Mark?
Guest:And I go, that guy is like an ominous demon.
Guest:And I would say dark things about you.
Guest:But the goal for me, not just today, but for the past several years, is like,
Guest:Let me get to know and meet some of these people that there's no reason to have any kind of weird animosity or whatever it is that lingers between or maybe things that I did or that I perpetuated or you did.
Guest:Right.
Guest:Let's figure it out and be able to go, okay, you know what?
Guest:We're just guys trying to get laughs, man.
Guest:At the center of it, it's like just trying to live an honest life, make a few bucks, keep your family healthy and happy.
Guest:So are we both saying we're overcoming our fears and that perhaps there's a, I think there's a fucking buddy movie with you and I in it.
Guest:Like, you know, our own midnight run.
Guest:I don't like to live with fear in my heart.
Guest:I get very fearful.
Guest:Like most people too.
Guest:You go, Oh, that, you know, you, you ruminate and you go, Oh, is this guy, what's going to happen when I finally sit with him?
Guest:And I, I could have avoided and Bill's like, dude, you should do the show.
Guest:I'm like, I'm a fan of the show.
Guest:That's a great, that's a great sign.
Guest:Burris said I should do it.
Guest:I'm a little intimidated by Mark, you know, from how I, you know, viewed him years ago.
Guest:Fuck it.
Guest:I'm just going to go sit here and just be myself.
Guest:And you'll either like me or not.
Guest:And by the end, you know, your fans or whoever chime in will still have a perspective based on this conversation.
Marc:Half of them would be like, you know, he wasn't such a bad guy.
Marc:The other half would be like, you pussied out.
Guest:You didn't go hard enough on him.
Guest:Patrice O'Neill, you can't fuck with the truth.
Guest:He said it to me in 1994 at the back of Nick's Comedy Stop, and I've never forgotten it, and I just try to be that no matter what.
Marc:No, I feel good about what we've done here.
Marc:You do?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:You?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:All right.
Marc:Well, then let's call it a day.
Marc:We'll shake because you are filming this.
Marc:And if there's something we need to talk about again, we'll do it another time.
Guest:That sounds good.
Guest:I enjoy your show.
Guest:I'd love to come back.
Guest:Thanks, Dan.
Marc:Please have me back.
Marc:Sure, man.
Marc:I think it went good.
Marc:All right, so because I mentioned as he was walking out, Dane was running off, and I said, do you grind your own coffee?
Marc:Because I was going to give him his parting gift of a bag of just coffee.coopcoffee, perhaps WTF blend.
Marc:And he said no, and he ran off, and then all of a sudden he had a lackey or somebody who works at his company, I guess his new wave or something.
Marc:I don't know.
Marc:Some guy shows up with me to sign for a package.
Marc:I'm like, what the hell is this?
Marc:And he said it's from something, something production company.
Marc:I'm like, what did I do?
Marc:And then he'd bring it in, and it's like six pounds of this coffee.
Marc:Vanilla, hazelnut.
Marc:But it was a nice thing to do.
Marc:To Mark, this is the card.
Marc:From motherfucker Dane Cook, high above the world, wearing a robe.
Marc:And in parentheses, a.k.a.
Marc:at IHOP in sweatpants, eating egg whites on wheat toast.
Marc:He said, until running charades happens, I enjoy doing your show and everything that comes with it.
Marc:Nice guy.
Marc:And I appreciate that.
Marc:Thank you, Dane.
Marc:And best of luck to you holding on to the reins of your success.
Marc:And go to WTFPod.com for all your WTF podcast needs.
Marc:Get on that mailing list.
Marc:I'm enjoying putting it together.
Marc:So that's happening.
Marc:Get some JustCoffee.coop.
Marc:Hit the Audible link.
Marc:Look up Stitcher.
Marc:Support our sponsors.
Marc:And please let us know what's on your mind.
Marc:Follow us on Twitter.
Marc:Send us a little money.
Marc:That would be very nice because Brendan and I are doing this for a living.
Marc:And I'm thinking about creating some new t-shirt designs.
Marc:So inspire me.
Marc:Someone sent a Nerdcock t-shirt design that's actually palatable that I might make.
Marc:Aside from that, the Reno gig was canceled, if anyone was looking forward to that.
Marc:I don't know why.
Marc:I had nothing to do with it.
Marc:I'll be in New York the third week of July.
Marc:I'll get you in the loop on that stuff.
Marc:July 16th, I just got a confirmation from Craig Robinson for the live WTF at UCB here in Los Angeles.
Marc:I'm rambling at the end.
Marc:You know, I was a little manic at the beginning, and I think I have a lot of clarity.
Marc:I even sense that the tone and the way that my diction is flying out of my mouth has something to do with outcasts.
Marc:with the obstacle of nicotine being removed.
Marc:I hope I can stay off it.
Marc:I'm doing it for me because I didn't want my fucking mouth to rot.
Marc:See, I got a little edge.
Marc:A little edge.
Marc:All right.
Marc:I'll talk to you later.
you