BONUS Archive Deep Dive - Third Act Guests
Marc:How's it going?
Marc:Welcome to some bonus stuff.
Marc:Now, last week's episode, Brendan and I were talking, and we mentioned that we used to do a third act on the show.
Marc:Some of you who have listened to all the shows know this.
Marc:Some of you who go back with us know this.
Marc:But there used to be a third act, and it used to be
Marc:Sometimes it was just more me talking.
Marc:Sometimes I talked to my parents.
Marc:Sometimes I talked to other people that I knew like Dr. Steve, my sponsor was on a lot, sometimes shorter talks with other comics or friends, but there was definitely three segments to the show.
Marc:Now,
Marc:What we were talking about and what was always the most exciting to me in a very specific way was a lot of them were long-form improvs, but we played them off as if they were real, right?
Marc:Sort of a—we used to call it Kaufman-esque, but whatever.
Marc:Listeners were confused, and we got a lot of responses from people who wanted updates on them, like as if the people were real.
Marc:They were concerned or curious.
Marc:So the conceit for these improv pieces were that I was booking these people based on human interest stories that I saw online.
Marc:That was the whole premise.
Marc:So we're going to share a few of these with you.
Marc:And honestly, some of these are my favorite things because I haven't listened to them in a while.
Marc:And one of the guys who's on two of these, I don't even know what happened to this guy.
Marc:I mean, I knew him a million years ago in Boston.
Marc:He was in Louie's early movies.
Marc:He worked with Sam Seder a bit.
Marc:He was in the world.
Marc:He was in the comedy world, did some stand-up.
Marc:This is going back to, geez, man.
Marc:I guess it would be the 80s.
Marc:And then he became some sort of counselor of some kind.
Marc:Dave Waterman is his name.
Marc:And this first one that I'm going to play for you is Dave as a purported teen drug counselor, Daryl Loomis.
Marc:Now, this is from episode 36.
Marc:And I guess the time has come for us to let some people know, because this might be triggering to some people or some people might remember being concerned or curious about Daryl, that Daryl was not real.
Marc:As you know, I have been unorthodox in my guest booking, and I do try to help.
Marc:I do maybe not as much research as I should around the guests I have, but this guy, Daryl Loomis, was referred to me by somebody who I know from...
Marc:From a certain organization that I'm involved with.
Marc:And I try to help out.
Marc:I do try to help out.
Marc:And I know that when I was a teenager, I used drugs and I drank a lot.
Marc:It was just part of it for me.
Marc:And in retrospect, I don't regret anything.
Marc:But certainly I wasn't aware that, you know, it could cause a problem necessarily or that I would have that problem.
Marc:But my guest, Daryl Loomis, how are you, sir?
Marc:Fine, thanks.
Marc:Has been reaching out to teens about drugs, which is a tremendous problem still to this day.
Marc:And there are new drugs.
Marc:I got to be honest with you, Daryl, as a...
Marc:As a guy in my mid-40s who hasn't done drugs or drank for 10 years, you know, when I see, you know, there are certain drugs that weren't even around when I was a kid.
Marc:And then I have to fight the jealousy because, you know, I know that I can't use drugs safely.
Marc:Now, what your organization is...
Marc:SAT, which I guess is a riff on the test, right?
Guest:That was the idea, correct.
Guest:Essentially what our organization, Safe Abuse Technologies, is setting out to do is to sort of pioneer a new approach in terms of addressing what has been now for several generations a significant issue with our young people.
Guest:And indeed, a lot of their parents today, you're not alone.
Guest:Being somebody in their 40s who has had experience, suffered some negative consequences, and quite likely could have avoided them
Guest:had you had the level of intervention and education that is now available to us through research.
Marc:SAT, let me just understand.
Marc:A couple questions.
Marc:I'd like to get the real details.
Marc:Now, your experiences in teen counseling.
Guest:That correct.
Guest:Teen counseling, teen mentoring is where my career started.
Guest:I, too, am an individual that had a significant amount of experience with substance abuse.
Guest:And for many years talking with kids, I kept that a secret.
Guest:I discovered that when I began to get honest with kids about the experiences that I had.
Marc:Uh huh.
Guest:I got a significant amount of positive response.
Guest:And the openness and the attraction of that kind of conversation with a teenager was surprising and inspirational.
Guest:And that's where I developed SAT, which is Safe Abuse Technologies.
Marc:Now, so you're getting kids off drugs.
Marc:I mean, this is the basic premise of what we're doing here, right?
Guest:That's a good question.
Guest:It's quite different.
Guest:Now, intervention would be a process where there is a young person or anybody that is suffering from an addiction.
Guest:An addiction, I think your listeners need to know, is defined by the World Health Organization as the continued compulsive abuse of a substance despite negative consequences to the user.
Guest:What we're doing is we're addressing the issue before it becomes an addiction.
Guest:We're addressing... That's great.
Guest:Exactly.
Guest:Thank you.
Guest:The teenage brain, as many people may or may not know, actually, is controlled primarily by the amygdala.
Guest:The amygdala is the part of the brain that doesn't recognize fear, is very forgetful, and needs to be constantly stimulated.
Guest:That's what we're dealing with when we talk to teenagers.
Guest:So when you show them a scary video about what marijuana could possibly do or intoxication could possibly do, it's going to have little or no effect.
Guest:A teenager is interested in trying substances.
Guest:They just are.
Guest:We know that the amount of money that's put into advertising and exposure and mixed messages have left a lot of teenagers confused.
Guest:But 60% of high school seniors have used mood and mind-altering substances.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:With that information, SAT sets out to say, okay, we accept it.
Guest:You're going to do it.
Guest:Let's help you do it safely.
Guest:Let's provide information to have you avoid addiction and overdose.
Marc:How do you get the parents involved with this?
Marc:Parents are frustrated.
Marc:Do you pitch them some other angle?
Marc:I understand they're frustrated, but you're saying that you're going to sit down with the parents and their teenage kid and get high.
Guest:That's what I'm saying.
Guest:That's what SAT is saying.
Guest:We're going to let them have a mood and mind-altering experience.
Guest:We're going to talk them through it.
Guest:We're going to really kind of encourage.
Marc:Because I'm looking at the press materials here.
Guest:Is this part of the Hi Mommy, Hi Daddy program?
Guest:Hi Mom, Hi Dad is our programs designed for the entire family.
Guest:The Family Stone is what we call this particular offering.
Guest:And it gets the parents to indulge with their young people so that there can be a share.
Marc:And what happens?
Guest:We have a mood and mind-altering experience.
Guest:We create a genetic sequence within our brain using mood and mind-altering hallucinogenic.
Guest:Like what?
Guest:Well, now that you bring it up, a drug of choice among many teens is salvia.
Guest:I don't know if you or your listeners are familiar.
Marc:I heard a little bit about that.
Marc:There's videos of salvia trips.
Guest:Google salvia and you're going to have a plethora of live action video and information.
Guest:Much of it is correct.
Guest:There's a lot of misinformation.
Guest:Let me tell you a little bit about salvia.
Guest:Salvia comes from the mint family.
Guest:It's basically a sage and it grows relatively easily throughout the U.S.
Guest:In fact, pretty much all environments.
Guest:The effects on a human being primarily are gained through smoking salvia, much like one would smoke marijuana from a bong or a pipe.
Guest:You could even roll it up with tobacco.
Guest:It's a very, very significant hallucinogenic experience, and that's where essentially the two sides of a human being's brain, logic and creativity, entwine into what is a waking dream.
Guest:Oh, you don't got to tell me.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:So this, however, is unlike any other hallucinogen that perhaps you and other parents may have been exposed to.
Guest:This lasts approximately 20 minutes in most cases.
Guest:20 minutes is the length of the hallucinogenic experience.
Marc:And it comes on pretty quick, I think.
Guest:It comes on in about 20 seconds.
Guest:However, the user needs to know that if there is a psychiatric break, which means that the brain is overreacting to the hallucinogen, there is evidence that shows that there have been some teenagers that have needed hospitalization afterwards.
Guest:so that there has to be some arrangements made for an ambulance.
Guest:And the benefit of this is what?
Guest:We believe that the whole impetus, the whole desire to use drugs is the forbidden fruit syndrome will evaporate because it's like, I can do this if I want to.
Guest:Look at Amsterdam.
Guest:How much drugs do you use?
Guest:Me personally?
Yeah.
Guest:Based on what I'm... You've got to practice what you preach.
Guest:So I smoke marijuana on a daily basis.
Guest:I drink to intoxication two or three times a week.
Guest:I do use hallucinogenic drugs approximately three times a month.
Guest:Have you smoked this salvia shit?
Guest:Well...
Guest:If I can make a proposition, and I'm not sure how you'd feel about this, and certainly I'm not going to ask you to sign anything, but in my possession, incidentally, this is not a crime in Southern California.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:I am in possession of salvia.
Guest:Here it is.
Guest:Oh, my God.
Guest:It has sort of a texture very much like tobacco.
Marc:It looks like mint.
Marc:It does look like mint.
Guest:And here's the first lesson.
Guest:We want to show the children what it is so that they know what it is that they're getting and they're not confused by some moron that comes with oregano or some other substance.
Marc:Let me just look at it.
Guest:It comes in a little bag.
Guest:You can purchase this at pretty much any head shop.
Guest:Hold on.
Marc:Yeah, it smells like a spice.
Guest:It is a spice, essentially.
Guest:That's the origin of it.
Guest:Well, this is an ideal situation, and something that I had not really thought I was going to propose, but I'm going to go ahead and do it.
Guest:I am going to inhale what amounts to the average amount of salvia that a teenager would inhale, and it's just a bowl.
Guest:I have a marijuana pipe here.
Marc:Okay, so wait, what's going to fucking happen?
Marc:Because I've been long out of the position of being someone's guide here.
Guest:Well, I'm going to give you just a couple of key phrases.
Guest:that you can use once I begin to feel the effects of salvia.
Guest:Now, guaranteed, I am going to be in a hallucinogenic experience, but these phrases that I give you, if you say them to me calmly and directly, it will keep me in a place in my brain where I will not be overwhelmed by salvia.
Marc:All right, hold on.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Now, let me write them down.
Marc:This is, I don't know.
Marc:All right, go ahead.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Hey, man, you're okay.
Marc:Hey, I can remember that.
Marc:I used to say, just hang on.
Marc:That's fine as well.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Breathe.
Marc:Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure.
Marc:Breathe, dude.
Marc:Hold on, breathe.
Marc:Dude.
Marc:Oh, dude, sorry.
Marc:Breathe, dude.
Marc:Breathe, dude.
Marc:Bro.
Marc:Bro, right, bro.
Marc:Breathe, dude, or breathe, breathe, bro.
Guest:You're cool, you're cool, you're cool.
Marc:So you're cool, you're cool, you're cool.
Marc:That's it.
Marc:All right, so now.
Marc:All right, all right.
Marc:Yeah, pack the bowl.
Marc:This makes me a little itchy.
Marc:So this is something you can do with the family.
Marc:Whatever we're going to see now, everyone's got, in a situation, say it's one kid, maybe two parents, one parent.
Guest:Everyone's got a grandparent.
Guest:I mean, when you think about grandparents being of the Woodstock generation.
Guest:Sure, sure.
Guest:And we're in a new age where we're comfortable being comfortable talking about.
Guest:All right.
Marc:So so grandma, maybe one or two parents and a kid.
Marc:Everyone's got their own pipe.
Marc:You've got your own pipe.
Marc:Everyone's loaded up.
Guest:Well, some will be.
Guest:Some won't be.
Guest:Some will be playing the part that you're going to be playing, which is going to be kind of the the guide.
Guest:Right.
Guest:Right.
Guest:The safety officer, whatever you want to refer to it as.
Guest:OK.
Guest:OK.
Guest:So I'm good to go.
Guest:Are you ready to go?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:How long is it going to take to kick in?
Guest:About 20 seconds.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:So I can talk you through it.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:So this, I'll probably take an inhalation of about 15 seconds.
Guest:And you hold it?
Guest:Okay.
Guest:You good?
Guest:You hold it for like what?
Guest:15 seconds.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:You good?
Guest:It smells kind of good.
Guest:Minty.
Guest:it's out now you ought to just uh open the window and uh as you can see uh my head didn't explode and and initially the effect of salvia will take here it comes yeah here it comes
Guest:Okay.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Hey, man.
Marc:You okay?
Okay.
Guest:Hey, hey, hey.
Guest:Hey, you're cool.
Guest:You're cool.
Guest:You're cool.
Guest:Not good.
Guest:Not good.
Guest:Not good.
Guest:You're cool.
Guest:You're cool.
Marc:Just breathe, dude.
Marc:Just breathe, dude.
Marc:Okay, play with the box.
Marc:I don't even know what to do.
Marc:Hey, just sit in the chair.
Marc:No, no, no, not the table.
Marc:I got the mic up.
Marc:Just sit in the chair.
Marc:Just breathe, dude.
Marc:Breathe, bro.
Marc:Breathe, bro.
Marc:Okay, just breathe, bro.
Marc:You're cool.
Marc:Hey, man.
Marc:Are you okay?
Marc:What are you seeing?
Marc:Do you see anything?
Marc:You look like a praying mantis.
Guest:Are you a praying mantis?
Guest:No, I'm not.
Guest:You look like a praying mantis.
Guest:You're cool.
Guest:You're cool.
Marc:You're cool.
Marc:You're cool.
Marc:You're cool.
Marc:All right.
Marc:All right.
Marc:All right.
Marc:All right.
Marc:All right.
Marc:How long does this fucking last, bro?
Marc:I mean, I'm sorry.
Marc:Just breathe, bro.
Marc:Oh, my God.
Marc:Just breathe, bro.
Marc:All right.
Marc:All right.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:All right, be cool, bro.
Marc:I mean, breathe, dude.
Marc:I mean, breathe.
Marc:Hey, man, you're okay.
Marc:Hey, man, you're okay.
Marc:You cool?
Marc:You're cool.
Marc:I mean, you're cool.
Marc:Wow.
Guest:Fuck.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Fuck.
Marc:All right?
Marc:Just breathe, dude.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Just breathe, bro.
Marc:Hey, man.
Marc:I can only breathe out.
Marc:No, no, no.
Marc:You can just pull in.
Marc:Pull in.
Marc:Pull in.
Marc:No, no.
Marc:Just pull in.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:No, no, no.
Marc:Now do both.
Marc:One after the other.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:That's... All right.
Marc:I don't know how this is advantageous to families.
Marc:I'm not seeing... I need to lay down, dude.
Marc:All right.
Marc:Just... All right.
Marc:Well, let's...
Marc:I guess we'll close this segment.
Marc:Let me get Daryl some water, and perhaps we'll do some follow-up.
Marc:I'm not sure about this program.
Marc:All right, all right, I'm coming, dude.
Marc:All right, all right.
Marc:Don't cry.
Marc:Oh, shit.
All right.
Marc:All right, so I'm back here with Daryl Loomis, who is better.
Marc:I got to be honest with you, that was scary for me.
Marc:It is.
Marc:You started crying, and I shut the mic off because I didn't know if I was going to have to call.
Marc:hospital or ambulance you could have left it on you could have left it on but i'm glad you i mean i didn't want to embarrass you you're new at this it's totally it's totally understandable basically what you were saying was like i don't know i don't know i don't know why i don't know why and then and then there was more crying and then you said dad dad dad dad where did that come from how does this function in a family therapy situation a couple of ways a couple of ways
Guest:My saying, Dad, I know from my experience, both in therapy and on my spiritual journey, that my dad was a staunch opponent of substances.
Guest:He was a hard, hardcore Republican.
Guest:Not that that makes much of a difference, really, but...
Guest:you know, I was embarrassed.
Guest:I was trying to live up to an idea that my dad had.
Guest:So that's probably where that came from.
Guest:So that, that, that, if we were in a family dynamic, you might get any number of different reveals.
Marc:But it seems to me that there's a certain level of denial.
Marc:And what you're saying is that it seems like a parent child bond is deeper than that.
Marc:And you're just framing it as, is that he didn't like drugs.
Marc:You seem to be justifying your drug use with this thing.
Marc:And then I don't see how it functions as a, as a real therapy.
Marc:I mean,
Guest:Well, it indeed is a bridge.
Guest:It isn't a foundational in and of itself experience.
Guest:It's merely a bridge to higher pastures.
Marc:But you're all fucked up.
Marc:You're all fucked up.
Marc:You're going to do this again next week or three days from now with a family?
Marc:No.
Guest:I'll probably use one of my interns at this.
Guest:I'm having what I consider to be the ideal reaction because...
Guest:That was rough.
Guest:The phrases I gave you worked.
Guest:They worked.
Guest:I'm here.
Guest:I'm alive.
Guest:So they clearly worked.
Guest:You were shook up a little bit, but you had some training, just a little bit of training, and you were able to hang.
Guest:You chose to turn the mics off that I think is credible.
Guest:That's logical thinking.
Guest:Had I stopped breathing, I'm sure you would have called 911.
Guest:But I don't want to do it again, man.
Guest:I don't want to smoke salvia ever, ever, ever again.
Guest:I'm not going to lie on any level to kids or to families or to hosts.
Guest:That was rough, man.
Guest:Have you ever even done this with families?
Guest:We're baby steps.
Guest:This process is being, first and foremost, it's the curriculum.
Guest:Second, it's the promotion, which you're a big part of, and we thank you so much for promoting.
Marc:I really have to get someone working for me in the booking department.
Marc:I mean, you were great, and I'm glad that you had this.
Marc:What the fuck is that smell, man?
Marc:Did something happen?
Marc:Did my cat come in here?
Guest:I normally would have had a pair of adult diapers.
Guest:Oh, come on.
Guest:I defecated during the experience.
Guest:It's not unusual.
Guest:Oh, my God.
Guest:There's an intimacy that families... I mean, you're talking about a 14-year-old kid changing his diaper could cause some memories.
Guest:We're done.
Marc:Daryl, we're done.
Guest:We're done.
Guest:SAT, just contact me through the show if you want more information.
Marc:That was Dave Waterman, Daryl Loomis, classic.
Marc:Okay, so the second one here is Matt Walsh from the original UCB crew who's gone on to act in many, many things as Michael Garvey, creator of a homebound assistance program.
Marc:Matt's very funny.
Marc:They're all very funny.
Marc:This is from episode 43.
Marc:Music
Marc:I know some of you are losing faith in my booking ability because I do try to book people that are helpful and that are doing things in the world because I don't really do political talk radio anymore, but certainly I want to reach out to people any way I can because a lot of us are experiencing the same type of frustrations and anger and problems.
Marc:And I haven't always batted a thousand with guests, but we try to do what we can.
Marc:And I'm hoping today, you know, we'll sort of renew your faith in my ability.
Marc:Because today I found a gentleman who is doing something that I think is very compassionate and very community service oriented.
Marc:My guest today is Michael Garvey.
Marc:Welcome, sir.
Marc:Thank you.
Marc:That's quite a lean in.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Let me just tell people my understanding.
Marc:Now, your organization is Homebound Buddies.
Marc:Homebound Buddies, that's right.
Marc:And you are basically providing, it's not like Meals on Wheels, you're not delivering goods, but what is the agenda?
Marc:I mean, what do you do?
Guest:I like to say it's a lifeline through the phone to the lost souls of L.A.,
Guest:Oh, so it's primarily L.A.
Guest:right now.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I live in L.A.
Guest:and I can call obviously anywhere, but a lot of the people that I end up calling are people who are in the Los Angeles area.
Marc:So this is only a phone service, you know?
Marc:It is a phone service, yeah.
Marc:So now what is it exactly?
Marc:I mean, you deal with people who are homebound?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Um, I guess I'll give you a little backstory if that's okay.
Guest:Um, I was a bit of, uh, uh, I don't know, outcast, I guess, as a young boy and, uh, I never fit in and I went through a period where I was, uh, a shut in by my own choice.
Guest:Um,
Guest:The other kids didn't really like me, and for whatever reason, I was weird.
Guest:I wasn't really weird, but they thought I was weird.
Guest:And so I had to get myself out of that and feel normal.
Guest:And I read a U.S.
Guest:census the other day.
Guest:There's 1.3 million people in this country that could be categorized as shut-in or homebound.
Guest:Now, that's a lot of people who are feeling like I did as a teenager.
Guest:And it really...
Guest:It really hit me as like, well, am I going to live in my house in the valley and just take care of myself?
Guest:Or am I going to reach out to the people who went through something that I know?
Marc:Right.
Marc:Well, now homebound can mean a lot of things.
Marc:It can mean people with disabilities.
Marc:It can mean people with sicknesses.
Marc:But from what I understand you saying is that yours was a mental issue primarily.
Guest:Um, it was, yeah, it was a mental, it was a self-imposed, I mean, I definitely had, I could walk and I could go to school if I wanted to, but, um, I isolated and I wouldn't leave the house for months at a time.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Cause I would be ridiculed or teased and just simply reading.
Guest:Like there were other people throughout history and even on the internet, there's other people like me who, who felt like they were alone.
Guest:And you know what?
Guest:I wasn't alone.
Guest:Right.
Guest:And, um, all things pass.
Guest:Sure.
Guest:And I think, um, encouragement, you know, just through friends, uh,
Guest:authors and people on the internet what about your family your family my family my uh mother uh my mother helped me but she in some ways enabled me uh-huh to you know she encouraged me to stay home oh really yeah yeah i did not go to college until i was 25 oh and so i spent from like 18 to 25 at home
Guest:Really?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:It was a dark time, and I would stay in my room for, you know, long periods of time, and somehow hope found me.
Guest:Right.
Guest:Through the roof of my mother's house.
Guest:So why don't you tell me a little bit about how this works, and who do you reach out to?
Guest:How does that work?
Guest:Sure.
Guest:Well, like you said before, a lot of people who are homebound or shut-ins are the aging.
Guest:There's a huge aging population in this country.
Guest:Some people have panic disorders or agoraphobia, and they're unable, and there's no support system.
Guest:Uh-huh.
Guest:Uh, so what I started doing is, uh, when I decided to create homebound buddies, my own non-for-profit is I said, I'm just going to get 10 phone numbers.
Guest:And I went down to the local church that's right on my corner.
Guest:And I said, are there any people that you deliver meals on wheels or any people that you need to reach out to?
Guest:And, uh, I called them and, uh, I think I talked to seven of them in one night and, uh,
Guest:And I didn't really have an approach.
Guest:And then over, I've done it for six months now.
Guest:And over the months, I've developed like a questionnaire where I don't try to get people out of their house.
Guest:I really just try to tell them they're okay and there's people like them.
Guest:And then no expectation past that.
Marc:All right, so why don't we do one?
Marc:Why don't I be the person?
Guest:Would that work?
Guest:Sure.
Guest:If we do that?
Guest:Sure.
Guest:And the idea is, Mark, and I know you have listeners, is I have like a system now that if there's other people like me who want to reach out,
Guest:We could get them the email of the questions, and I could give them phone numbers.
Guest:This is truly an outreach.
Guest:I know you have a lot of listeners.
Marc:I have depression in my family, so I certainly know the frustration of somebody that is paralyzed mentally to not get out of the house.
Guest:Okay.
Marc:All right, so let's say, all right, you've called me, and what happens?
Guest:Well, generally, I'll call them, and I'll say, you know, my name's Mike Garvey.
Guest:I'm Homebound Buddies.
Guest:Mike who?
Guest:Oh.
Guest:I'm kidding.
Guest:Yeah, sometimes it is.
Guest:They need a hearing aid, and I'll have to say, turn up your hearing aid.
Guest:Right, right, right.
Guest:And then I'll say, I'm not trying to get money, because there's so many people preying on the disenfranchised in this country.
Guest:Sure, just hang up.
Guest:They'll just hang up on you.
Guest:Yes, so I have to earn their trust by saying, I'm not.
Guest:I'm trying to get money.
Guest:I'm trying to find out who you are.
Guest:And then I say what the mission statement of Homebound Buddies is to throw a lifeline to the lost souls of Los Angeles.
Marc:Okay, so now I'm on the phone with you.
Guest:Hi, Mike.
Guest:Hi.
Guest:Hi, Mark Maron.
Guest:I know, Mark.
Guest:I got your number from the YMCA.
Guest:Oh, nice.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Are you with the YMCA?
Guest:No, I'm not.
Guest:I'm with an organization called Homebound Buddies.
Guest:I don't have any money.
Guest:You know what?
Guest:I'm not looking for money.
Guest:What I'm looking to do is just talk to you and ask you a few questions.
Guest:About what?
Guest:I'm just here alone.
Guest:Well, pretty much anything you want to talk about.
Guest:We'll take my questions and whatever you feel like talking about.
Guest:I think I know what people who don't go outside want to talk about because I've talked to a lot of those people.
Guest:You want to talk about television?
Guest:Well, let me ask you first.
Guest:How are you today?
Marc:I'm okay.
Marc:You know, my feet hurt.
Marc:And, you know, I sit too long.
Guest:Yeah, that's right.
Guest:That's right.
Guest:You know what?
Guest:I understand that.
Guest:Did you... And then I'm not talking to you.
Guest:I'm talking to the host of the show now.
Guest:What I try to do is...
Guest:almost like an intervention, try to case out where their health is at if there's an emergency because they have other, you know, it's not irresponsible.
Guest:I have a suicide hotline, et cetera, et cetera, health care facilities on my desk at all times.
Guest:So now we're back in.
Guest:Okay, I'm back in the character.
Guest:Did you eat something today?
Marc:I had a little breakfast.
Marc:I had toast and half a bowl of cereal.
Marc:Good.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:I think it was healthy.
Guest:Good, good, good.
Guest:Did you have a bowel movement today?
Guest:What?
Guest:Did you have a bowel movement today?
Guest:I went.
Guest:I did.
Marc:I did.
Marc:I went.
Marc:Did you have more than one?
Marc:I don't think so.
Marc:I would know that, but my memory's not so good.
Marc:I definitely went once because I remember I had to get up from the table during breakfast.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:I'm going to ask you a few questions.
Guest:I want you to describe your bowel movement.
Guest:Was it watery with no solids?
Guest:What?
Guest:Was it watery with no solids?
Marc:My shit?
Marc:No, it was fine.
Marc:It was fine.
Marc:I don't do it very often.
Marc:You know, like every two days if I'm lucky, and usually they're good.
Guest:I mean, that's one of the things I... Would you describe it as being long with a smooth surface?
Guest:it took a little time okay so so it took a little time yeah so so it probably was not characterize it as a sausage with surface cracks what like a sausagey one with surface cracks yeah maybe that's good okay yeah like a little sausage were the ends well defined were the were there were the ends well defined or were they blobby
Marc:the ends i don't i don't spend a lot of time looking at it now maybe i should i look at it and call you back no no you can you can just try to remember oh yeah it was it was good the more you talk about it the better it was it was you know i just i pinched it off and it had a nice a nice uh tail on it okay was the tail was it fluffy with ragged edges the tail this is getting me a little uncomfortable i mean i i'm playing along here
Marc:But okay, so now we're on like the sixth question about the shit.
Guest:That's what people who are homebound have to talk about.
Guest:And that is also very common.
Guest:That's basically what unites us.
Marc:All right, but I mean, right out of the gate, I mean, he asked two questions.
Marc:There's no TV talk.
Guest:Mark, these are people who don't go to movies.
Guest:They don't know who Britney Spears is.
Guest:These are people who have sheltered tragic lives.
Guest:They don't know the hot restaurant.
Guest:Everyone has TV.
Guest:A lot of the shut-ins don't watch television.
Guest:And what unifies us more than our bowel movements?
Guest:Supermodels go to the bathroom.
Guest:Tom Cruise goes to the bathroom.
Marc:Okay, I understand that.
Marc:Everybody shits, and you're saying that it's a humanizing thing.
Marc:Yeah, it is.
Guest:It's the bond.
Guest:It's the bond between all of us.
Guest:But does everybody talk that specifically about their shit?
Guest:I can't imagine that you're calling it.
Guest:Well, I happen to know a lot about bowel movements.
Guest:You don't have to call them shit.
Guest:I happen to know a lot about feces.
Guest:So I can get a good gauge on their health, on their intestinal system.
Guest:And quite frankly, I don't mind doing it.
Guest:I don't mind talking about their bowel movements.
Guest:Well, that's clear.
Marc:We just went through like seven questions.
Marc:Do you have more questions that aren't necessarily that specific?
Marc:Like where do we go from there?
Marc:Just the end is, can I call another time?
Marc:What time?
Marc:What do you mean, can you call another time?
Marc:That's it?
Marc:You asked all the questions?
Marc:That was all the questions?
Marc:Mm-hmm.
Marc:You asked two questions about how I'm doing, and you asked seven questions about my shit.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:Or bowel movement.
Guest:Your bowel movement.
Guest:Yes, I did.
Guest:Because I'm not sure what you're getting at, Mark.
Guest:What am I getting at?
Guest:I have an outreach service, okay?
Guest:And I happen to relate to them because, yes, I had a bit of a fetish with feces when I was 20 to 25.
Guest:And I understand what it's like to be an outcast.
Guest:So I've taken my own illness and I've channeled it into something that serves the community.
Guest:And I don't think I'm an oddball or a weirdo or I'm obsessed with it.
Guest:I'm having a human adult conversation with people, quite frankly, don't mind talking about their shits.
Marc:Okay, okay.
Marc:They don't mind talking.
Marc:All right, just take it easy.
Guest:All right, just take it easy.
Guest:Well, you attacked me.
Guest:I know I did.
Guest:I went through this in high school and I had poop on my hands.
Guest:Yes.
Guest:What do you mean?
Guest:We've all had poop on our hands when we were children.
Guest:And what's the difference if you're 18 if you're five?
Marc:What are you doing with poop on your hands?
Guest:I had poop on my hands because I touched my own poop.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:Okay?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And right now what I do, I am so tired of this country making fun and making light of what... It is completely normal to have a curiosity about your own feces, to be grounded and to touch what came out.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:I enjoy it.
Guest:I understand.
Guest:I enjoy it, Mark.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:And you know what?
Guest:What?
Guest:The people I talk to on the phone do not mind it.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:And I do a service to them.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:All right, Michael.
Marc:I understand, and I appreciate you being here.
Marc:Do you really?
Marc:I do, and I wish you the best of luck with your endeavor.
Marc:Homeboundbuddies.com is a great way to get a hold of us.
Guest:Okay.
Marc:Look, I'm sorry.
Marc:A couple of these have shit punchlines.
Marc:But, you know, funny is funny.
Marc:This third one is David Waterman again.
Marc:And this aired after an interview with David Wayne on episode 71.
Marc:And Waterman is a guy named Troy who claimed he was once part of David's comedy group, The State.
The State.
Marc:You know, in relation to my conversation with David Wayne, I look, I'm about the same age as he is.
Marc:I remember the state on television.
Marc:I remember when they were starting out as a comedy group because we're all in the same community.
Marc:And in light of the fact that I seem to be doing some fairly in-depth work here on the podcast, I
Marc:I remembered a story from probably 20 years ago about the state.
Marc:It seemed like a crazy story to me and about how they worked as a comedy group, their work ethic, and some darker elements.
Marc:And, you know, through, you know, because I've been in this business a long time, you know, I'm about one degree of separation from just about anybody.
Marc:But this was a difficult guest to have.
Marc:But I just I saw it.
Marc:We're going to use the name Troy, I think.
Marc:Right.
Marc:Right.
Marc:Troy is not in the business anymore for very specific reasons.
Marc:We're going to talk about it.
Marc:And it was because of his experience with a group of comedy performers that became the state, including David Wayne, Michael Showalter, Michael Ian Black, Tom Lennon.
Marc:I know that many fans of the state listen to this.
Marc:So, Troy, now let me understand.
Marc:Well, you're not in show business anymore.
Marc:No, not at all.
Marc:Not at all.
Marc:And you were at NYU in the late 80s.
Marc:Mm-hmm.
Marc:Which is where the state started.
Marc:That's where it was organized.
Marc:Right.
Marc:They were the new group.
Marc:Characters, sketches, whatnot.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And one of the first things that David Wayne and Michael Showalter sort of like inspired in me actually was this isn't necessarily just a hobby for everybody.
Guest:This isn't just an experience for everybody.
Guest:There's actually money to be made.
Marc:But this can be a job.
Marc:This can be a profession.
Yeah.
Guest:They were suggesting to myself and others that we may very well be professionals with this.
Guest:At that age, of course, you're impressionable and you're excitable.
Guest:I actually did consider for a year and a half at NYU while I was affiliated with them.
Guest:I was actually kind of thinking, yeah, I'm going to go into comedy.
Guest:What happened there?
Guest:Well...
Guest:I guess it was about six months ago, I'm listening to NPR.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And David Wayne and Michael Showalter were being interviewed.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I'm listening and I'm hearing things about what they're doing presently and kind of how they started.
Guest:I can't remember who the host was or who the interviewer was on NPR at that time, but...
Guest:i suddenly began to perspire my my heart started racing yeah i i i felt like i felt dizzy and i had to pull my car over to the side of the road wow and i just started crying i just started uncontrollably sobbing and i had i mean i listen i'm married i have kids i've got a good life i mean like everybody there's been a cut but
Guest:You know, this didn't go away.
Guest:And for a few weeks, I kind of wrestled with it.
Guest:And finally, my wife convinced me to talk to a regression therapist.
Guest:And in a sense, my experience with the state was very symptomatic of post-traumatic stress disorder.
Guest:I mean, what are you talking about?
Guest:We're talking about a comedy group.
Guest:There were some things that were going on that would rival any fraternity hazing, any sort of lacrosse.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Oh, my God.
Guest:Oh, my God.
Guest:It kind of began with these marathon improv sessions that would begin Friday.
Guest:They'd call it happy hour.
Guest:Right.
Guest:And it would end Sunday night.
Guest:What?
Guest:Three days?
Guest:The improv would start.
Guest:You'd get a first line or a last line.
Guest:Right.
Guest:You know, kind of a scenario.
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:Typical improv exercise games.
Guest:And David would say, he had this whistle.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:But it wasn't like a referee's whistle.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:It kind of made like a...
Guest:Like a dragon.
Guest:Man, it made a creepy sound.
Guest:And he said, when you hear this whistle, you are not to break character until you hear the second whistle.
Guest:And I mean, we're talking Saturday.
Guest:We've been up 24 hours.
Guest:It's Saturday at three o'clock and I'm still playing like this doctor role.
Guest:I've done every possible operation you can imagine.
Guest:I've treated every type of patient.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:symptom and just and it would just it was exhausting and you were sleep deprived and so was this just was the agenda you know just to be funny I mean I don't understand I mean did they go on for more than like two days or I mean what they I think David and the two Michaels recognized that there was going to be this onslaught of young people
Guest:excited, ambitious performers.
Guest:And they wanted the cream of the crop.
Guest:They wanted the best.
Guest:They wanted the perfect specimen.
Marc:They wanted, but it also, it seems to me like that, you know, that, you know, that sleep deprivation.
Marc:I mean, didn't it, didn't it get weird?
Guest:I mean, I mean, Mark, if you, I know this isn't TV, but if you see this
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:What is that?
Guest:A tragedy comedy mask?
Guest:Tragedy comedy mask.
Guest:And this is, it's a scar.
Guest:It's actually, it was branded into the inside of everybody's knee.
Guest:Are you serious?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:If you, if you, if you showed any type of sort of skill, I guess is the word, um, they brand you and, and the two Michaels had this side room in their loft space where we would do these like extra session work.
Guest:Yeah.
Um,
Guest:where you would be stripped naked you would be lathered in sort of a vaseline type thing um you were then forced to roll around in sawdust and it's like at the time you're young and you think yeah this is like animal house stuff this is this is this is totally normal but then to to take photographs of you
Marc:So let me understand this, because it's sort of shocking to me in the sense that, you know, between sleep deprivation, you know, taking young minds.
Marc:I mean, it sounds to me, if I'm not mistaken, that I've done a little reading with cults that that, you know, when you deprive someone of sleep, that they become very malleable.
Marc:So, you know, that people that were able to pull this stuff off that didn't get damaged by these tests.
Guest:Mm hmm.
Marc:that they were the ones that we see in the final cast of the state.
Marc:And you were in that cut.
Guest:Why I left and what we were talking about was essentially where I had to draw the line and where I freed myself.
Guest:I escaped and then suppressed it for many years.
Guest:From what?
Guest:What was it?
Guest:Murder.
Guest:What?
Guest:What?
Guest:It was murder.
Guest:It was assassinations.
Guest:It was executions.
Guest:It was eliminations.
Guest:They were hits.
Guest:There was a list.
Guest:Carrie Kenney was being groomed to woo people like David Cross.
Guest:Dave Chappelle.
Guest:She even had a lesbian thing with Sarah Silverman.
Guest:She was trying to get some stuff going on there and that the state would either bring these people in and have them convert to being sort of like pro state.
Guest:And if people weren't willing to play along, there was talk and may still be today.
Guest:There may be people's lives in danger.
Guest:We were given lists.
Guest:Okay.
Marc:All right.
Marc:So what you're saying is that right now, as we speak, people that watch the state in their early teens, some may be activated to do this killing.
Marc:That there are comedians' lives at risk now.
Marc:And and that they can be like snapped on at any point.
Guest:This is my fear.
Guest:This is this is what I think is going to happen.
Guest:This is the the fact that Will Ferrell is alive today experiencing the success he's having is part and parcel of this.
Guest:Why did everybody stop watching Jim Carrey?
Guest:I mean, Jim Carrey did not stop being funny.
Guest:Jim Carrey didn't stop.
Guest:It's arguable, but I understand what you're saying.
Guest:Well, I mean, what's also true is that people stopped viewing him.
Guest:One of their test subjects.
Guest:Dave Chappelle also is not really, you know, he had that thing.
Guest:Why did Dave freak out?
Guest:Right.
Guest:I mean, really?
Guest:Okay.
Guest:Same offices just down the state had offices.
Marc:Artie Lang tried to kill himself.
Guest:The state has an agenda and it's not funny.
Guest:Ha ha.
Guest:So there's a lot more going on than we could ever imagine.
Guest:Right.
Guest:There's a lot more going on.
Guest:There's a lot more that will go on.
Guest:There's a lot that has gone on, currently is going on.
Guest:That's exactly what I'm saying.
Guest:And believe me, I know that coming out in this form and fashion is not going to be met with immediate acceptance.
Guest:But I mean, look around at what's happening.
Guest:OK, yeah.
Guest:The election of President Obama based on on on media hype and the youth and the youth vote, the youth vote.
Guest:I mean, that's that's always something that David Wayne wanted to put in place.
Guest:An energetic, ultra liberal, you know, say what you will about your politics.
Guest:But David got his way here.
Guest:Wait.
Guest:So you're saying that David Wayne put Obama in place?
Guest:Quite possibly.
Guest:I mean, who voted for him?
Guest:The MTV generation.
Guest:Even Clinton was kind of like their test subject because the whole Mona Lewinsky.
Guest:But they couldn't vote then.
Guest:The whole Mona Lewinsky.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Monica Lewinsky was an intern at MTV.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:And not a lot of people know that.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:So there's a connection there.
Guest:Right.
Guest:Muslim extremists.
Guest:What's that got to do with anything?
Guest:Look at the guy that tried to blow up Times Square.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Pakistan has satellite dishes.
Guest:Pakistan has television access.
Guest:Was he working with terrorists or was he watching the state?
Guest:And is this what inspired him to do what he did?
Marc:So you're saying that the state has, that David Wayne and the state has already programmed a generation to...
Guest:David Wayne and the two Michaels, in fact, every person affiliated with the state after 1991, have systematically pre-programmed a generation to do its bidding.
Guest:The state is not only...
Guest:A force to be reckoned with, but they are a pulse of danger that is coming through your computer screen, your iPod.
Guest:For those that still have televisions, television screens, there's more to come.
Guest:There's more to the story.
Guest:And quite frankly, I hope I live to see it because I think by coming out this way, I've put myself in jeopardy.
Guest:Okay.
Marc:Well, do you ever think you might, you know, this might be a personal thing with you?
Marc:I mean, in the sense that you really think that what you're saying is true or that maybe you're just mad at them?
Guest:It's a good question.
Marc:Thanks for being here.
Guest:Oh sure.
Guest:Thanks for having me.
Marc:Classic.
Marc:Classic Waterman.
Marc:So this idea for creating this guy who was in the state but never mentioned in the state actually came in earnest from, I wanted, I had an idea about a rogue member of the state and we wanted one guy from the state to do it.
Marc:This guy, Todd Hulebeck.
Marc:And we had this idea of interviewing him to be like, why did you get out of show business?
Marc:And it would turn out that he was traumatized because David Wayne and Michael Ian Black and Michael Showalter were psychopathic murderers and he did not want to do it.
Marc:So that didn't really manifest.
Marc:So I got Waterman to essentially do the same thing, but just playing an anonymous 12th member of the state, Troy.
Marc:Troy.
Marc:But I don't think we could get Hula Beck.
Marc:And I remember asking a couple of the guys about Hula Beck.
Marc:Because I was curious.
Marc:because I had a chip on my shoulder about the state.
Marc:All right, so this last one is a little different, but it's worth sharing.
Marc:Nick Kroll doing his Latin DJ character, which he ended up doing in many places, but this was pretty exciting.
Marc:This is Nick Kroll doing his Latin DJ character, El Chupacabra, from episode 26.
Marc:Music
Guest:Oh, we've got a caller.
Guest:Can we take this caller?
Marc:We're doing a podcast.
Marc:We can't take a caller.
Guest:All right.
Guest:It's caller number three, I think.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Caller.
Marc:All right.
Marc:Hello, caller.
Guest:Hola, Mark Maron.
Marc:Hello.
Marc:Who's this?
Guest:Yo soy un baby.
Marc:Oh, it's a baby on the phone, Chupacabra.
Guest:Oh, hello, baby.
Guest:¿Qué pasa, baby?
Guest:Hi, Mark Maron.
Guest:I have a question.
Marc:What's your question, baby?
Guest:You have the new T-shirt with the WTF podcast?
Marc:I do.
Marc:I have them available to subscribers.
Marc:You can buy one off the site.
Marc:Do you have baby T-shirt?
Marc:I have not printed any baby T-shirts.
Guest:Oh, maybe it's time to print some baby T-shirt for this baby.
Guest:Did you know that you had a baby fan base?
Marc:No, I didn't know I had a baby fan base.
Guest:Mark Maron, would you send me one of your gatos for mail?
Marc:You want a cat in the mail?
Mm-hmm.
Marc:sure i'll do that for you baby you're welcome thank you for calling oh the baby yeah that's a nice baby yeah i've never taken a caller i gotta tell you it was a pretty good experience we got a number the phone lines are lighting up okay do we have a caller online what line would that be four that line four hello
Marc:Who's this?
Guest:Señor Juarez.
Marc:I don't understand what he's saying.
Guest:I'm saying Señor Juarez is on the phone.
Marc:Oh, Señor Juarez on the phone.
Guest:Quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack.
Guest:That's Señor Juarez's song.
Guest:Oh, okay.
Guest:He called my radio station.
Marc:Okay, now when you're on your radio station, do you usually have a machine where you push a button and the song comes, or you just go organic like that?
Guest:It's organic.
Marc:That's really old school.
Marc:That's horrific.
Guest:Yes.
Marc:So are we still on the phone with...
Guest:Yes, Senor Juarez, do you have a question for me or El Chupacabra?
Marc:Because I just don't find that I have a need to believe in God.
Guest:Nothing.
Marc:Wow.
Marc:Is he all right?
Marc:Hello?
Guest:Hello?
Guest:Oh, that's a shame.
Guest:I think Senior Juarez just found out what was about to happen to him.
Marc:We've had our first death on the air by caller on a show that has never taken calls before.
Marc:This is a tremendous experience.
Marc:Now, what about Mexican television?
Marc:I don't watch much of it.
Marc:Oh, it's great.
Marc:Have you ever done any appearances on that?
Guest:I did two seasons on El Gordo y El Blonde.
Guest:Let's see.
Guest:For three years, I was the anchor for what we is, like ABC News.
Marc:Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Guest:I was the anchor.
Marc:Now, did that have a co-anchor, I'm assuming?
Guest:Yes, it was a chimpanzee.
Marc:How did that go?
Guest:It was great.
Guest:It was El Chupacabra y El Gua, Gua, Gua.
Marc:Wah, wah, wah.
Marc:And the news.
Guest:And the news.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And now the news.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And let's see.
Guest:I had a three-year sim where I hosted Singled Out.
Marc:Oh, yeah.
Marc:Sure, sure.
Marc:After Chris Hardwick did.
Guest:Yes, exactly.
Guest:But in Mexico.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:What was it called in Mexico?
Guest:It was called You Have Been Singled Out as a Single Person and You Will Die Alone.
Marc:It's a long title.
Guest:It was a long title.
Guest:It shortened to El Pao Ja Power.
Yeah.
Guest:And that was a good show.
Guest:That was a very good show.
Guest:I thought it was a good show.
Guest:And then for three years, I hosted Scientific American.
Marc:You did?
Marc:Yes.
Marc:With a chimpanzee.
Guest:Yes, I was the voice.
Guest:It was Alan Alda.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I would do the voiceover for Alan Alda.
Guest:Oh, okay.
Guest:I was the voice of MASH.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:When they changed all of MASH for Spanish, it was me.
Marc:Oh, I see what you're saying.
Guest:Yes, I am the voice of Alan Alda in all his movies and TV shows.
Marc:Oh, can you do a little of that?
Guest:Sure.
Guest:Mira, this Korean, he's about to die.
Marc:That was in English.
Guest:Well, that's what Spanish is.
Marc:Oh, okay.
Guest:Spanish is just English with an accent.
Marc:Oh, okay.
Marc:I didn't realize that.
Guest:I did radar.
Marc:Yeah, radar.
Guest:Radar.
Marc:Yeah, how'd that?
Guest:Radar was, I just saw you a nerd.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:That was his lines.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:And then there was the boy who dressed like a girl.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:Oh, please let me out the army.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:That's very good.
Marc:Clinger.
Marc:That was Clinger.
Marc:Clinger.
Marc:Yeah, I bet you people pick that off right away.
Guest:Always.
Guest:They know right away.
Marc:Okay, so now what have you got coming up?
Marc:You got any big shows?
Guest:Let's see.
Guest:Yes, we're doing a prank of babies.
Guest:We're doing a prank show.
Guest:We call babies across the country.
Marc:Yeah.
Guest:And we're going to do that for December, January, and February.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:And what do you do?
Marc:You prank babies?
Marc:We prank babies.
Marc:What is that sort of world?
Guest:We call homes where babies are.
Guest:We ask to speak with them on the phone.
Guest:And then we ask some very complicated questions that they cannot know the answers to.
Marc:Oh, that's hilarious.
Guest:I have a clip from that.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Can we?
Marc:Hold on.
Marc:Let me run it.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Let's run the clip.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:Hey, vamos.
Guest:Let's call those babies.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:That's so great.
Guest:Let's call those babies.
Guest:Okay.
Guest:All right.
Guest:Ring, ring.
Guest:Ring, ring.
Marc:That's he's making the phone noise.
Shh, shh, shh.
Guest:Hola, hola.
Guest:Hey, is this a baby?
Guest:Si, yo soy a baby.
Guest:Hey, baby, your oven is on.
Guest:Turn it off or you will blow up.
Guest:What?
Guest:Baby, learn how to walk and get out of your home and run away because your oven is about to explode.
Guest:okay we know you're a baby is that the clip and that was one of the clips that's a great clip it's a great show yeah i'm very popular and aren't you doing uh i think i read that you're doing a remote at a car dealership yes we're going to a car dealership it's for the uh cats for clunkers yeah so we go in and we trade one of your cats for a car
Marc:El gatos.
Guest:El gatos por los clonqueros.
Marc:Okay, so I'm going to have to give you a cap?
Guest:Yes, but you will end up with a Mazda Miata.
Marc:Oh, well, that seems like a good trade.
Marc:That's a nice car to drive.
Marc:A Miata?
Guest:That's a good, sexy car.
Guest:They still make those?
Guest:Yes.
Marc:Oh.
Guest:Yes, well, it's a Hyundai, but we put the Miata symbol on the back.
Marc:Oh, okay, so that's how that works.
Guest:That's how it works.
Marc:So I'm saying, so what car dealership is this?
Guest:It's a car dealership my friend Enrique has it.
Guest:Should we just quickly do a traffic report before I go?
Marc:Do you know what the traffic is?
Guest:Yes, we're going to Enrique in the sky.
Marc:Are we going to him now?
Marc:Yes.
Marc:Okay, so we're going to go to Enrique in the sky.
Guest:Hola.
Guest:Soy Enrique in the sky.
Marc:Hello, Enrique.
Marc:What's it look like out there?
Guest:Hay mucho trafico.
Marc:Yeah, where exactly?
Guest:Okay, that was the traffic report.
Guest:There's a lot of traffic.
Guest:That's the report from Enrique.
Guest:And that will cost extra, too, before the helicopter.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:This is costing me a lot already.
Marc:I'm out of pocket on this.
Marc:You're out of pocket.
Marc:Do you want to do a quick... Don't be so Jewish.
Guest:Oh, there it comes again.
Guest:There it was.
Marc:Should we do a quick commercial?
Guest:I got the commercial.
Marc:Okay, hold on.
Marc:Okay, we'll be right back after this break.
Guest:Hello.
Guest:My name is Tom Hanks.
Guest:And I watch the Mark Maron podcast every day in between doing Forrest Gump, watching Tom Hanks, me, Tom Hanks, and the Mark Maron podcast.
Guest:Double duty, F. Are we back?
Guest:We're back.
Marc:Well, I've got to say, Chupacabra, you know, it was great to talk to another radio professional.
Guest:Oh, so great.
Marc:And I appreciate you coming by.
Guest:Thank you for having me.
Marc:Yeah, do you need a ride anywhere?
Guest:No, no, no, no.
Guest:I have at least three men on bicycles with radios on them, and they carry me on like an emperor.
Marc:Very good.
Marc:So I'm sorry we can't get film of that, but Chupacabra, it's been great talking to you.
Guest:Ah, great talk to you, my madam.
Marc:Adios.
Guest:Chao-chao!
Marc:There you go.
Marc:That was fun.
Marc:A fun walk down improv lane, which is not one I go on often because I don't have that deep of an improv experience with these guys who are at the top of their game.
Marc:So I hope you enjoyed that.