Episode 394 - Kevin Christy

Episode 394 • Released June 2, 2013 • Speakers detected

00:00:00Guest:Lock the gates!

00:00:07Marc:Are we doing this?

00:00:08Marc:Really?

00:00:08Marc:Wait for it.

00:00:09Marc:Are we doing this?

00:00:10Marc:Wait for it.

00:00:12Marc:Pow!

00:00:12Marc:What the fuck?

00:00:14Marc:And it's also, eh, what the fuck?

00:00:16Marc:What's wrong with me?

00:00:17Marc:It's time for WTF!

00:00:19Marc:What the fuck?

00:00:20Guest:With Mark Maron.

00:00:24Marc:All right, let's do this.

00:00:25Marc:How are you?

00:00:25Marc:What the fuckers?

00:00:26Marc:What the fuck buddies?

00:00:27Marc:What the fucking ears?

00:00:28Marc:What the fuck nicks?

00:00:29Marc:What the fuckadelics?

00:00:30Marc:This is WTF.

00:00:31Marc:I am Mark Maron.

00:00:32Marc:How is everybody doing?

00:00:34Marc:I'm doing quite well.

00:00:35Marc:Everything is, well, you know, not really.

00:00:39Marc:God.

00:00:40Marc:All right, look, I'm going to give you some information today about an issue.

00:00:44Marc:I'm going to talk about the garage a bit.

00:00:46Marc:I cleaned the garage.

00:00:48Marc:What am I giving you an index?

00:00:49Marc:Kevin Christie is here.

00:00:50Marc:He's a very talented man.

00:00:52Marc:Very funny man.

00:00:53Marc:He's a good actor.

00:00:54Marc:He's an incredible graphic artist and painter.

00:00:58Marc:Just I mean, you know, all right.

00:00:59Marc:And he's got a good story.

00:01:00Marc:So, you know, but that doesn't mean you fast forward from here.

00:01:03Marc:That means we hang out for a minute.

00:01:04Marc:OK, I got things I want to talk about.

00:01:06Marc:I'm going to be in Phoenix at Stand Up Live this Thursday for one show only.

00:01:12Marc:I'd appreciate it if you're in the area.

00:01:14Marc:Well, you know, look, I'd appreciate it.

00:01:16Marc:Come down if you want to see me.

00:01:17Marc:All right.

00:01:17Marc:I mean, what else can I say?

00:01:18Marc:I'm going to tell you about Patent Trolls in a minute, too.

00:01:21Marc:This is important.

00:01:22Marc:All right, there's a real threat to what I do, to what podcasters do, to what you enjoy having, however you listen to it.

00:01:30Marc:There's a real threat by predatory douchebags who add nothing to the world, who are now shaking down

00:01:39Marc:People like myself, people like Ari Shafir, like Sam Seder, they're suing Adam Carolla.

00:01:44Marc:I mean, it is.

00:01:45Marc:And people can't believe it when they hear it.

00:01:48Marc:I'm going to get I'm going to tell you more about that in a second.

00:01:50Marc:Look, I cleaned the garage.

00:01:52Marc:I mean, I cleaned it good.

00:01:53Marc:I got rid of about 500 books.

00:01:55Marc:You know, my show, because of what's going on, well, it's been like this for a while.

00:01:59Marc:You know, people send, not listeners, but publicists and publishers and stuff, and I get a lot of music.

00:02:06Marc:I get a lot of stuff being sent to the show.

00:02:09Marc:And it stacks up, and I can't throw away anything.

00:02:11Marc:So what I've done, I haven't thrown away most of the new stuff, but I've rotated out all the books that I got during my Air America time.

00:02:19Marc:Because I've got to be honest with you, the 90 books about George Bush...

00:02:24Marc:are not as relevant right now, and I don't really need that.

00:02:27Marc:There's a bunch of political books that I just unloaded.

00:02:29Marc:I was doing more political talk back in the day, and I chose to move away from that because it was draining, and I felt sort of used.

00:02:37Marc:But anyway, so I cleaned out the garage.

00:02:39Marc:It was getting dusty and disgusting.

00:02:41Marc:I did realize that it's really not my garage.

00:02:43Marc:Apparently, it belongs to spiders.

00:02:45Marc:I found more, and don't tell anybody who's coming on the show about this.

00:02:48Marc:I found more spider eggs and spider weirdness and bug weirdness, but I literally had not...

00:02:53Marc:vacuumed or dusted or done anything for years so my hands were covered with blackness you know from uh from dust and i got all of it out and it's immaculate and now i'm i'm in a cd rabbit hole because i got these two giant boxes of cds i feel like i have to load them back in to uh to my itunes i never loaded some of these because some of these are all new and now like i'm doing that do i help

00:03:16Marc:How long am I going to live?

00:03:18Marc:How much music am I going to really listen to?

00:03:20Marc:Is it that essential that I have every one of these CDs that I received one way or the other in my iTunes?

00:03:26Marc:I don't even think I have enough life in me to listen to everything I have on my iTunes the way it is.

00:03:31Marc:If I just sat down and did it straight, I wouldn't make it.

00:03:34Marc:I wouldn't make it.

00:03:35Marc:I don't have the time.

00:03:37Marc:So I'm kind of stuck in that.

00:03:38Marc:Unfortunately, I did not find it's not a hoarding situation.

00:03:41Marc:Thank God I did not find Boomer, you know, decayed and under a stack of records or books in here.

00:03:49Marc:I was fortunate to to not have that horrible thing happen.

00:03:53Marc:I miss a guy.

00:03:54Marc:I mean, Jessica was crying the other day just thinking about she can't go out on the deck anymore.

00:03:59Marc:It's

00:03:59Marc:But I did get this encouraging email.

00:04:01Marc:Important Boomer news.

00:04:03Marc:Hi.

00:04:04Marc:So my housemate got a kitten, and while searching for a name, I suggested Boomer.

00:04:08Marc:I later discovered the kitten is, in fact, Boomer reincarnated.

00:04:12Marc:Don't worry about how I know this.

00:04:13Marc:It's not important.

00:04:14Marc:Anyway, Boomer seems happy, although if I'm listening to the podcast, I sometimes get this fucking look, dot, dot, dot.

00:04:21Marc:Just thought you should know, Jeff.

00:04:23Marc:Thank you.

00:04:24Marc:I'm glad Boomer is reincarnated.

00:04:25Marc:I am still holding on to hope that Boomer will one day...

00:04:29Marc:appear on my deck, either as an angel cat or as Boomer himself.

00:04:35Marc:But I appreciate that.

00:04:37Marc:It's a very thoughtful letter.

00:04:38Marc:Now, look, let me explain to you what's happening before we get to Kevin Christie.

00:04:41Okay.

00:04:43Marc:This patent troll called Personal Audio claims to own a patent that covers distributing episodes via the Internet.

00:04:49Marc:He claims this guy and his company, Personal Audio, which is really just a sham storefront in Texas where they have lenient patent laws in terms of getting patents.

00:05:02Marc:He claims to have the software for podcasting.

00:05:06Marc:He claims to have patented it.

00:05:07Marc:So he patented a diagram in 1996 and then reconfigured the patent so it's broad enough to apply to podcasting and is now using that to sue podcasters and shake other podcasters down through threatening letters.

00:05:22Marc:Now, the people that don't think I talk about politics anymore.

00:05:24Marc:Well, obviously, a lot of politics is unjust, but this directly relates to me.

00:05:27Marc:And there's something wrong with the patent system.

00:05:29Marc:There's something wrong with the way that we are able to defend ourselves against predators like this.

00:05:33Marc:There's something wrong with the legal system.

00:05:35Marc:They don't give a shit about grassroots momentum.

00:05:38Marc:They don't give a shit about anything.

00:05:40Marc:They're not.

00:05:40Marc:They're obviously not in the business of publicity.

00:05:44Marc:They don't.

00:05:44Marc:You know, they're not looking for people to go, well, that's a righteous business.

00:05:48Marc:They don't give a fuck because they've got the law on our side and a patent system that's become archaic.

00:05:54Marc:You know, look, patents are protected for a certain amount of time.

00:05:56Marc:And then after a statute of limitations runs out, they reenter the world so people can build on them and progress can happen and technological growth can happen.

00:06:04Marc:Creative growth can happen and businesses can move on entrepreneurially and otherwise, you know, creatively.

00:06:12Marc:It's not meant to be used like this, where this guy knows his patents about to run out.

00:06:16Marc:So now he's going to shake down guys like me, guys who work out of the garage for a licensing fee because he's got a patented diagram.

00:06:23Marc:And then I find out the guy tried to make an MP3 player years ago with his patent, but he didn't get it done.

00:06:27Marc:So he's a failed businessman who is now reverse engineering his diagram that he's got paperwork on.

00:06:36Marc:All right.

00:06:38Marc:He's retrofitting it.

00:06:40Marc:onto podcasters and then demanding money from them to protect themselves against him.

00:06:46Marc:It's fucking horrendous.

00:06:48Marc:You can go to WTFPod.com and there'll be a link up there for you to take action or learn about this stuff because a lot of people just think it's crazy, but it's not crazy.

00:06:57Marc:It's not crazy.

00:06:58Marc:In 2011, patent trolls directly cost companies at least $29 billion.

00:07:04Marc:The damage to the economy as a whole has been estimated at close to $100 billion a year.

00:07:09Marc:The majority of companies targeted by patent trolls have less than $10 million in annual revenue, way less in the case of

00:07:16Marc:Me, Sam Seder, Ari Shafir, Jesse Thorne, Adam Carolla.

00:07:25Marc:It's a big problem.

00:07:26Marc:It's obviously not just about podcasting.

00:07:29Marc:This is the first time they've fucked with us.

00:07:32Marc:It's app developers.

00:07:34Marc:It's unbelievable.

00:07:36Marc:People that have the click to upgrade functions, company who can use scan to email technology have been targeted.

00:07:44Marc:Cafes and public spaces that offer free access to Wi-Fi have been targeted.

00:07:50Marc:It's a fucking complete legal fucking shakedown business.

00:07:55Marc:The EFF, the Electronic Frontier Foundation, bless their fucking hearts.

00:08:00Marc:has decided it's a smart idea for them to take on this patent and they're going to file for a re-exam.

00:08:05Marc:They're raising money.

00:08:06Marc:What we need in order to defeat this patent troll is essentially what they call prior art.

00:08:15Marc:The EFF needs to show that the claimed invention was not new or it was obvious.

00:08:21Marc:And to do this, we need to find publications from before October 2nd, 1996, that disclose similar or identical ideas.

00:08:30Marc:In other words, anything that describes early versions of podcasting or any other kind of episode distribution over the Internet.

00:08:38Marc:Now, I know some of you cats can find this stuff, and I've already put the call out to warrior nerds and obsessive techno freaks.

00:08:47Marc:It's out there.

00:08:48Marc:I know it's out there and we've already got a lot of good stuff.

00:08:51Marc:But if you have anything that that could help in that area and if you want more details and also a place to send it, if you find anything.

00:09:02Marc:You can go to www.eff.org slash save dash podcasting.

00:09:10Marc:EFF.org slash save dash podcasting with some of that prior art.

00:09:17Marc:And that would help.

00:09:19Marc:Please go educate yourself about this because if you do anything in the technology realm, if you want to start a business, these fuckers can come after you for nothing because they got a piece of paper that was legitimized by an archaic patent system and then supported by a legal system that makes it almost impossible for the guy like me or the guy like any of you who are starting a business to defend yourself.

00:09:38Marc:So you got nothing else you can do but just surrender to these techno gangsters.

00:09:47Marc:I ain't.

00:09:48Marc:It's fucking horrendous.

00:09:49Marc:And then all of us are afraid.

00:09:51Marc:I didn't want to talk about this a while ago because, well, what's going to happen?

00:09:54Marc:What's going to happen?

00:09:55Marc:These fuckers, they're extortionists.

00:09:59Marc:You know, and I got two letters and then they tried to contact me through the site email.

00:10:05Marc:We really suggest this.

00:10:06Marc:This is the best way to do this for you to give us money for a license.

00:10:10Marc:They don't tell a cost.

00:10:11Marc:And honestly, and I think most podcasters would agree with this.

00:10:15Marc:If at the beginning of podcasting, you know, we had to pay some sort of fee to get a license to podcast, maybe 100 bucks a year, whatever the hell it was, something reasonable so we could engage.

00:10:24Marc:So if this guy had done that, if this guy had designed his business properly, not just be a failed business guy who now is shaking down people who work out of their closets, out of the garages, in their car, wherever you're recording it, it's free medium.

00:10:39Marc:I would have paid that because I wouldn't have had a choice.

00:10:41Marc:It's like paying for texting on your phone.

00:10:43Marc:But no, this guy didn't do that because he's no visionary.

00:10:46Marc:He's running a racket.

00:10:51Marc:Personal audio.

00:10:54Marc:It's interesting that my tone of voice changes when I get worked up about something righteous.

00:11:02Marc:There's no way to spin this in a good way.

00:11:06Marc:these patent trolls.

00:11:09Marc:It really drives me nuts.

00:11:10Marc:It's been hanging over me.

00:11:12Marc:But switching gears, I'm about to introduce Kevin Christie, and I'm going to tell you guys, if you're still listening, that I might have some very exciting, good personal news next time I talk to you.

00:11:20Marc:Also, thank you for enjoying the show, Maren.

00:11:22Marc:It's doing very well over there on IFC, and I'm glad people are starting to get it and like it and dig it.

00:11:28Marc:You can also still buy my book, Attempting Normal.

00:11:31Marc:You can get that on the audio book.

00:11:32Marc:You can get that on the iTunes audio.

00:11:34Marc:You can get the hardcover.

00:11:38Marc:You know, it's your favorite bookseller.

00:11:40Marc:All right, let's talk to Kevin Christie.

00:11:42Marc:I love this guy.

00:11:45Guest:Drawing type is no bullshit.

00:11:51Guest:It is hard as hell.

00:11:53Guest:It's awful.

00:11:54Guest:Hand-drawn type is an unforgiving mistress.

00:11:57Marc:Is there still reason to do that?

00:11:58Marc:I mean, this was obviously your passion at some point.

00:12:01Marc:I mean, when did you start doing this shit?

00:12:04Guest:What, our stuff?

00:12:05Guest:Yeah.

00:12:05Guest:I always have.

00:12:07Guest:I always have.

00:12:07Marc:Kevin Christie, he's a hilarious comedian.

00:12:11Marc:He's an actor.

00:12:12Marc:He's an artist.

00:12:13Marc:He's a renaissance man.

00:12:15Marc:But if I showed you his picture, you'd be like, oh, I think, yeah, I know that guy.

00:12:19Marc:Yeah, maybe.

00:12:20Guest:Yeah, maybe.

00:12:22Guest:I might have crossed your eyeballs at some point.

00:12:25Guest:Yeah.

00:12:25Guest:But you're one of those guys, right?

00:12:27Guest:Yeah, a little.

00:12:28Guest:What's the plan, Kev?

00:12:29Guest:I don't know, man.

00:12:31Guest:I'm done.

00:12:31Guest:I'm done planning.

00:12:32Guest:Fuck it.

00:12:32Guest:Yeah?

00:12:33Guest:It's over?

00:12:33Guest:No, it's not over.

00:12:34Guest:I'm not in any way going to think I could make a plan that would come to any fruition.

00:12:41Guest:When did you come out here?

00:12:42Guest:You grew up out here?

00:12:43Guest:I grew up out here.

00:12:44Marc:In Los Angeles.

00:12:45Marc:So you're like, you've been roaming these streets.

00:12:48Marc:I'm from Glendale, basically.

00:12:49Marc:La Crescenta.

00:12:50Marc:From the beginning.

00:12:51Marc:From the beginning.

00:12:52Marc:What is that?

00:12:53Marc:What happens in that?

00:12:55Marc:From what I understand, okay, so you got your Glendale thing, you got some friends, but like Hollywood's right here, and you were sort of, were you in a clique that, what'd you do in high school?

00:13:04Marc:Did you go to Hollywood?

00:13:05Guest:No.

00:13:06Guest:And hang around?

00:13:07Guest:I mean, Hollywood to me was like so far away that you didn't... I think I went there four times between being born and being like 18.

00:13:15Guest:Really?

00:13:16Guest:So it's like New York City to New Jersey.

00:13:17Guest:Yeah.

00:13:18Guest:I mean, the big thing was my friend Travis Chatham got a car.

00:13:22Guest:Yeah.

00:13:22Guest:Or he had a car and I was a busboy, so I had like a little bit of money.

00:13:25Guest:Yeah.

00:13:26Guest:And we were going to go to Melrose so I could try to find a graffiti magazine.

00:13:29Marc:Really?

00:13:30Marc:Yeah.

00:13:31Marc:Like Juxtapose or something?

00:13:33Guest:No, there was a magazine called Can Control.

00:13:34Guest:It was only graffiti.

00:13:36Guest:This is pre-Juxtapose.

00:13:37Guest:Right.

00:13:38Guest:And so that was like, we went to Melrose with cash on a Wednesday after school, and I got a graffiti magazine, a t-shirt or something.

00:13:45Guest:That was a big trip in.

00:13:46Marc:Yeah, I was like- To go to crazy Melrose.

00:13:48Guest:Yeah, I was like, we got some culture.

00:13:50Guest:Yeah, yeah.

00:13:50Guest:We came back with culture.

00:13:52Guest:Yeah.

00:13:52Guest:Because, you know, La Crescenta is a pretty homogenized suburb.

00:13:56Guest:So you didn't have a car?

00:13:58Guest:No, I didn't have a car.

00:13:59Guest:He had a car?

00:13:59Guest:He had a car.

00:14:00Marc:Yeah?

00:14:01Marc:Yeah.

00:14:01Marc:And you guys didn't go drinking and driving around?

00:14:04Guest:I mean, he did.

00:14:04Guest:I was never good at that stuff.

00:14:06Marc:What the fuck did you do, Kevin?

00:14:07Guest:I just was drawing, man.

00:14:09Guest:Yeah?

00:14:09Guest:That's all I was doing.

00:14:10Guest:Who were your guys?

00:14:12Guest:Ooh, comic book stuff early on.

00:14:14Guest:Yeah.

00:14:15Guest:Who were they?

00:14:16Guest:Jim Lee, Stan Lee, obviously, Todd McFarlane, guys like that.

00:14:21Guest:Yeah.

00:14:21Guest:A guy named Sam Keith I really liked.

00:14:22Guest:And then I started looking at kind of the juxtaposed group of people.

00:14:27Guest:The outsider art thing.

00:14:29Guest:The outsider art, Robert Williams, people of Coop's nature.

00:14:32Guest:Yeah.

00:14:32Guest:And then I started taking art lessons from a guy named Aaron Smith and his twin brother Owen Smith.

00:14:38Guest:They were painters.

00:14:39Guest:And then I started getting into like, you know, figurative painting and art and then went to art school and got into all that stuff.

00:14:45Guest:Where'd you go to art school?

00:14:46Guest:Art Center College of Design, Pasadena.

00:14:48Marc:So you just were afraid of coming out of the- Super afraid.

00:14:53Marc:We're not going to go any west?

00:14:54Marc:Nope.

00:14:57Marc:Nope.

00:14:58Marc:What is art school?

00:14:59Marc:Were there groovy girls and were you all affected?

00:15:03Marc:Or was this like one of those kind of technical art schools?

00:15:06Guest:The Art Center College of Design is pretty dry.

00:15:09Guest:The parties there were the worst parties.

00:15:12Guest:No shit, it'd be four guys talking about paint.

00:15:15Guest:I mean, and there'd be, like, a girl.

00:15:18Guest:I'm not kidding.

00:15:18Guest:Like, I can specifically remember going to a party and talking to a guy about what Liquitex paint I liked best and how I was really into parchment color.

00:15:26Guest:And, like, even then I was like, this is not what these parties are for.

00:15:29Guest:Because there was no dorm.

00:15:30Guest:So there wasn't a dorm atmosphere.

00:15:31Marc:Commuter campus?

00:15:32Guest:Yeah.

00:15:33Guest:So, like, because it's up above the Rose Bowl, like, tucked in a hill.

00:15:36Marc:Is it part of that museum maybe?

00:15:38Marc:No?

00:15:38Marc:No.

00:15:38Marc:No, no, no.

00:15:39Guest:If you go above the Rose Bowl, there's like a long black rectangle, like a super modern rectangle wedged into a mountain.

00:15:45Guest:That's art center.

00:15:47Guest:Like it's super modern, like Bauhaus style, cold as ice art school.

00:15:51Guest:It was just very, it was super, super serious.

00:15:54Guest:Yeah.

00:15:54Guest:And, you know, the thing people don't understand about art school is the hours are crazy.

00:15:58Guest:I mean, I didn't, I probably averaged three hours of sleep a night.

00:16:01Guest:Really?

00:16:02Guest:You get 40 to over 40 hours of homework a week.

00:16:06Guest:Easy.

00:16:06Guest:And like what?

00:16:07Guest:I mean, I was an illustration major, so it's like you paint a thousand swatches or, you know, I had a class where you had to do a thousand figure drawings by the end of the semester.

00:16:16Guest:You do, you know, 250 hands, 250 feet.

00:16:18Guest:Like you just, it's a, you learned how to draw right by just tons of repetition.

00:16:25Guest:Really?

00:16:25Guest:So you have tons and tons and tons of work.

00:16:27Marc:So you just got a stack of hands?

00:16:30Guest:Yeah.

00:16:31Guest:And did that work?

00:16:33Guest:Yeah.

00:16:34Guest:Mm-hmm.

00:16:34Guest:I can draw fucking balls off a hand, man.

00:16:36Guest:I can draw a hand with my left hand, with my right hand.

00:16:39Guest:You just learn by doing it.

00:16:42Guest:And you just draw and draw and draw.

00:16:44Guest:You have to draw them in different poses?

00:16:45Guest:Yeah.

00:16:45Marc:Yeah, hundreds of them.

00:16:46Marc:And what does the repetition do?

00:16:48Marc:It just gives you a sense of the figure?

00:16:50Guest:It's a figure.

00:16:50Guest:You get a sense of what the hand does.

00:16:52Guest:Right.

00:16:52Guest:What you can do with it, where it can't go.

00:16:55Guest:You get a sense of when you're drawing it wrong.

00:16:57Guest:You start to see, you're like, that's not.

00:16:58Guest:It's this weird thing that happens when you're drawing something and you start, you put a line somewhere and you're like, oh, that's right.

00:17:03Guest:You can see it going right because I think something in your brain triggers like a visual memory.

00:17:07Guest:So you look at what you're doing.

00:17:08Guest:You're like, that makes sense.

00:17:09Guest:And you just keep doing that.

00:17:10Guest:You're like, this makes sense.

00:17:11Guest:This makes sense.

00:17:12Marc:And so you can just sort of like, yeah, I could say draw a hand and you'd be like, no problem.

00:17:16Guest:Boom.

00:17:16Marc:Did you do that with heads?

00:17:17Marc:Yeah.

00:17:18Marc:Heads?

00:17:18Marc:Feet?

00:17:19Marc:Feet.

00:17:19Marc:Yeah?

00:17:20Marc:Less feet.

00:17:21Marc:Yeah.

00:17:21Marc:Not as important.

00:17:22Marc:Not a lot of feet.

00:17:23Guest:Nah, a lot of people wearing shoes.

00:17:25Guest:Yeah.

00:17:26Guest:Every time in figure drawing class, everyone just like, everyone crap out at the feet.

00:17:29Guest:Everyone had flipper feet.

00:17:31Guest:Just like get real lazy around the genitals and feet.

00:17:34Guest:So what was it?

00:17:35Guest:Really?

00:17:35Guest:You didn't do a thousand genitals?

00:17:37Guest:A lot of guys were like, you could tell were afraid to draw dicks.

00:17:40Guest:Really?

00:17:40Guest:I was not one of them.

00:17:42Guest:I was telling someone the other day, there was a figure model at Pasadena City College, which I went to before Art Center, a guy named Shadow, who probably weighed about 115 pounds and had maybe the biggest dick I've ever seen in my entire life.

00:17:56Marc:That's why he was doing it.

00:17:57Guest:Junior college art schools are full with a lot of older women who are just taking a figure drawing class, and one day a woman walked in while Shadow was staying there and she dropped her art box.

00:18:08Guest:It was just, this thing was a thing of beauty.

00:18:11Guest:And like I told my friends about it, like my guy friends were like, no way, dude.

00:18:15Guest:I'm like, no, I'm not kidding you.

00:18:17Guest:Nine and a half soft and the circumference of a Pringles can.

00:18:21Guest:Oh my God.

00:18:21Guest:And so I drew it life-size one day and to brought it back, I was like, this is it.

00:18:25Guest:And they were just like, oh my God.

00:18:27Guest:And this dude was, he was real thin.

00:18:30Guest:And he held himself up with like a weird ornate cane.

00:18:34Guest:Really?

00:18:35Guest:Yeah, he was like a dancer.

00:18:36Marc:Uh-huh.

00:18:39Marc:I like to think he didn't have any personality.

00:18:41Marc:Is that?

00:18:41Marc:I've never saw him speak.

00:18:43Marc:That is fucking beautiful.

00:18:44Marc:Some middle-aged woman just dropped her arm.

00:18:46Guest:I mean, she had seen something she had never seen before.

00:18:49Guest:It was like a python slinked into the room.

00:18:53Marc:So what was the plan?

00:18:56Marc:Do you make money doing art?

00:18:58Guest:Yeah.

00:18:58Marc:You do?

00:19:00Marc:Mm-hmm.

00:19:00Marc:That's your thing.

00:19:01Marc:That's kind of your secret thing.

00:19:02Marc:You're a stand-up comedian, but then you do this other thing.

00:19:04Marc:You make posters.

00:19:05Guest:I make posters.

00:19:06Guest:I do illustrations.

00:19:06Guest:I just finish some skateboard designs.

00:19:08Marc:Skateboard designs?

00:19:09Guest:Yeah.

00:19:09Marc:You get hired to do that?

00:19:10Guest:Well, the way it happened was a friend of mine, this guy named Ed Templeton, is a pro skater and an artist, great artist.

00:19:16Guest:And he runs a company called Toy Machine.

00:19:18Guest:And he knows of my art stuff.

00:19:20Guest:And also, him and his wife, when they go on road trips for skate demos, they read my Twitter feed.

00:19:25Guest:And they asked me, like, you should do a series of Toy Machine decks based on Twitter jokes.

00:19:31Guest:And so that's what I did.

00:19:32Guest:I did eight.

00:19:33Marc:Eight skateboard decks, they're called?

00:19:35Guest:Yeah, designs for the decks.

00:19:36Guest:Based on Twitter?

00:19:37Guest:Based on jokes, basically.

00:19:38Marc:Really?

00:19:39Guest:Yeah, short jokes.

00:19:40Marc:And then what are the other illustrations?

00:19:42Marc:How does this work?

00:19:43Guest:I do album covers occasionally, magazine stuff.

00:19:46Marc:Did you do Jonah Ray's album cover?

00:19:47Marc:Nope.

00:19:48Marc:Whose album cover did you do?

00:19:49Guest:I did the first Kings of Leon album cover.

00:19:51Marc:You get good money for that?

00:19:53Marc:Is there a percentage?

00:19:54Guest:No, that industry died.

00:19:55Guest:It did?

00:19:56Guest:Yeah.

00:19:57Marc:They're back, dude.

00:19:58Marc:People are sending me records every five fucking minutes.

00:20:00Guest:Yeah, but they don't pay the illustrators or the designers.

00:20:02Marc:They don't pay them big.

00:20:04Guest:They got to pay them something.

00:20:05Guest:They pay you something, but I mean, you make probably 10% of what illustrators were making in the 70s.

00:20:11Marc:Were illustrators cut in on a percentage deal?

00:20:13No, no, no, no.

00:20:14Marc:No, but they made some good money.

00:20:16Marc:Who were the great, like, did you have album art designers that you were like, that guy's a fucking genius?

00:20:21Guest:Yeah, I mean, there was, you know, those like Yes covers?

00:20:23Guest:Yeah.

00:20:24Guest:Yeah, sure.

00:20:25Guest:Those.

00:20:26Guest:But with all the weird surreal kind of mushroom.

00:20:29Guest:Milton Glaser did, you know, Bob Dylan cover.

00:20:32Guest:And then there was a guy who taught at Art Center, Phil Hayes.

00:20:35Guest:He did like Eric Clapton covers.

00:20:37Guest:There's those guys.

00:20:38Guest:The 70s, that was just like a, that was a great, great time.

00:20:43Guest:Yeah.

00:20:43Guest:To be an illustrator.

00:20:44Marc:Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:20:45Guest:Those dudes made money.

00:20:46Guest:Like, they made good money.

00:20:47Guest:How come you never went into comics, man?

00:20:50Guest:I didn't... That's a shitty job.

00:20:53Marc:Yeah, but it seems like a no-brainer.

00:20:54Marc:You're a funny guy.

00:20:55Marc:Why don't you do panels?

00:20:57Guest:Honestly, I didn't... That didn't really appeal to me.

00:21:00Guest:Once I started looking at like...

00:21:01Guest:what was going on in like kind of the juxtaposed world and, and actual like start getting into like contemporary art.

00:21:07Guest:I just wanted to make art.

00:21:08Guest:Yeah.

00:21:09Guest:I wanted to like make personal work.

00:21:10Guest:Real art.

00:21:11Marc:No, not real art.

00:21:12Marc:But it seems to me that you could take any of your good Twitter jokes and make a panel, just create a character that's you.

00:21:17Guest:Yeah.

00:21:17Guest:But then it's just me standing there.

00:21:18Guest:Like I'd rather like the skate decks or I'd rather like interpret the image into something as opposed to like just a panel of a guy standing there talking.

00:21:25Marc:So when you approach a painting, you do paintings.

00:21:27Marc:Yeah.

00:21:27Marc:You're like, I'm going to do a painting.

00:21:29Marc:Yeah.

00:21:29Marc:I'm fascinated with painters and guys who can paint because I know the difference between a guy who can paint and a guy who can't paint.

00:21:36Marc:Right.

00:21:36Marc:I kind of know the difference between an illustrator and a painter.

00:21:39Marc:Right.

00:21:39Marc:So when you go in to do a painting, because you're a guy that now expresses himself as a comic, as an actor, and as a painter, what's the best one?

00:21:47Marc:Oh, fuck.

00:21:49Marc:Where do you really get, like, because to me, a painting, it's like, all right, you gotta know your shit once.

00:21:53Marc:So you gotta have your shit together.

00:21:55Marc:You know you can paint.

00:21:56Marc:So then you're sort of like, all right, I'm gonna paint what?

00:21:59Marc:What do you paint?

00:22:00Marc:Do you set up some fruit?

00:22:01Marc:Do you have the guy with the dick come over?

00:22:03Marc:I mean, what is it that you paint?

00:22:05Guest:I usually start with like something sort of inane, and then I kind of react off of it from there.

00:22:11Guest:But as far as like what, they feel very different.

00:22:14Guest:Making a painting, you get a sense of satisfaction, but it's very different from doing stand-up or something.

00:22:20Guest:I almost think the reason I split and do different things is to offset some of the detrimental parts of doing each.

00:22:29Guest:I mean, the thing about being an artist or a painter or anything like that is you can become a cave person real quick and not talk to anyone and turn into that.

00:22:39Guest:So it's like, I need to see some fucking people.

00:22:41Marc:Just be talking about paint to yourself.

00:22:42Marc:Yeah.

00:22:43Guest:There's no party and there's no dudes.

00:22:45Guest:Yeah.

00:22:45Guest:you and your paint look at you I get something very very different from all of them I actually stopped trying to have that conversation with myself what do you like better because people want to know that it bothers them if you can do more than one thing they get pissed which one would you choose with a gun to your head I'm like I'm not going to answer your fucking question Sophie's choice it's my fault you can't draw don't be mad at me stop being mad at me I'll draw you something I need you to draw me something

00:23:15Guest:Yeah, everybody does.

00:23:15Guest:I'll do it.

00:23:16Marc:Not right now.

00:23:17Marc:We'll figure out.

00:23:18Marc:But you don't do animation.

00:23:19Marc:You don't do moving things, right?

00:23:21Guest:I mean, I can do the concept work to have them move, but I'm not going to be an in-betweener.

00:23:26Guest:Strap yourself to a desk and die there.

00:23:30Marc:That's what it is?

00:23:31Guest:I mean, the first drawing is real fun, and then you're like, all right, we need 1,600 to make his arm go an inch and a half.

00:23:39Guest:So can you get on those other 1,600s?

00:23:41Guest:Yeah.

00:23:42Guest:the moving image takes there's a lot of frames in it yeah in those moving images that's not your bag no man so what when did you start doing the comedy what is i started doing comedy about 10 years ago i'd always you know wanted to be a comedian but i didn't understand how and uh i how old were you how old are you now i'm 36 so you were 26 i was 25 yeah yeah no i was 25 so maybe 11 years ago and uh

00:24:06Marc:And you'd hit the wall, you're done drawing, what happened?

00:24:08Guest:No, I've never, that's the thing, I never stopped.

00:24:10Guest:I just, I can't, I can't stop any of this stuff.

00:24:14Marc:Yeah.

00:24:14Guest:It's all just part of, it's all like interwoven into the basket that is Kevin Christie.

00:24:19Marc:Yeah, how'd you grow up though?

00:24:20Marc:What were your parents like?

00:24:22Marc:You seemed well adjusted.

00:24:23Guest:Yeah, no, they were normal white suburban parents, very nice people.

00:24:27Guest:Yeah, sisters, brothers?

00:24:28Guest:Stepsisters, adopted brother.

00:24:30Marc:Wow.

00:24:31Marc:Yeah.

00:24:33Marc:So you call him the adopted brother?

00:24:35Marc:Yeah.

00:24:36Guest:I call him the chosen one.

00:24:40Guest:What'd they end up doing?

00:24:41Guest:Jeff works at a medical facility, testing things.

00:24:44Guest:My stepsisters work at Whole Foods.

00:24:46Marc:Really?

00:24:47Marc:Yeah.

00:24:47Marc:This is like America, man.

00:24:50Guest:You know, a lot of people, when they meet me, they go, you're from the Midwest.

00:24:52Guest:And I go, no.

00:24:53Marc:So, all right.

00:24:53Marc:So there you go.

00:24:54Marc:So you're going to do comedy.

00:24:56Guest:I bought a recorder.

00:24:58Guest:I think I had a recorder with me for like two years.

00:25:01Guest:Like a digital recorder?

00:25:01Marc:Yeah, it wasn't digital.

00:25:03Marc:Oh yeah, those are great.

00:25:04Guest:I used to love those.

00:25:05Guest:Yeah, they're great.

00:25:05Guest:And I would just talk into it, kind of make up bits.

00:25:08Guest:And I was like, I'm gonna be a comedian.

00:25:10Guest:And then I did a commercial with Bobby Lee for AM, PM.

00:25:14Marc:So you're already going out on auditions?

00:25:16Guest:Yeah.

00:25:16Guest:I was working in commercials at that point.

00:25:19Guest:Already?

00:25:19Guest:In college, yeah.

00:25:20Guest:I started in college.

00:25:21Marc:Well, how'd that come about?

00:25:22Guest:That actually came about because I went to an art opening at Wacko to see the Clayton brothers.

00:25:28Guest:Sure.

00:25:29Guest:And for some reason, Miller Genuine Draft was making a commercial about the Clayton brothers.

00:25:34Guest:Yeah.

00:25:34Guest:And they had you sign a thing if we use you.

00:25:38Guest:Yeah.

00:25:38Guest:And then they used me just standing there in the commercial.

00:25:41Guest:And I got $4,000, which to me at the time was a million.

00:25:45Guest:Yeah.

00:25:46Guest:I didn't have to take a semester off because I had money for supplies.

00:25:49Guest:So I was able to stay a semester or not take off semester to save up money.

00:25:54Guest:And then like a couple months later after that, my friend was going to a commercial audition.

00:25:58Guest:We were going to go somewhere.

00:25:59Guest:And he was like, come with me.

00:26:00Guest:Not like to audition, just I have to go this thing.

00:26:03Guest:Hang out.

00:26:03Guest:Yeah.

00:26:03Guest:And the dude, the casting director asked if I wanted to audition.

00:26:06Guest:Yeah.

00:26:07Guest:And I said, fine.

00:26:08Guest:And they cast us both.

00:26:10Guest:And then my friend's commercial agent was like, if you want.

00:26:12Guest:What was that for?

00:26:13Guest:I was 4'7 up.

00:26:16Guest:Yeah.

00:26:16Guest:And then at the time, I looked like a very typical art school student.

00:26:21Guest:I weighed about 100 pounds.

00:26:22Guest:I had big glasses and messy hair and a tight T-shirt.

00:26:25Guest:And none of the actors had really caught up to that yet.

00:26:28Guest:So I was the only kid.

00:26:29Guest:So you were ahead of the curve.

00:26:30Guest:A little, yeah.

00:26:30Marc:It was pre-art school look.

00:26:32Guest:You actually looked like that.

00:26:33Guest:Yeah, because I was literally in art school.

00:26:35Guest:So I was getting all those roles.

00:26:37Guest:The first probably 20 commercials I did, I just stood there and looked edgy, I guess.

00:26:41Marc:You've done that many commercials?

00:26:43Guest:I've done like 65.

00:26:45Marc:Really?

00:26:46Guest:Yeah.

00:26:47Marc:Holy fuck.

00:26:48Marc:Yeah.

00:26:49Marc:All right.

00:26:49Marc:So let's go through that.

00:26:50Marc:All right.

00:26:51Marc:So then you go to this thing and then you got an agent.

00:26:54Guest:Yeah.

00:26:55Marc:Because this is a realm of show business that I don't talk about.

00:26:57Guest:Yeah.

00:26:58Marc:Yeah.

00:26:58Marc:Because I don't do them.

00:26:59Marc:I've had a couple experiences.

00:27:01Marc:They can be very bad.

00:27:02Marc:Well, I know people that do them, but this has been your fucking bread and butter for- Yeah.

00:27:05Marc:Kept me off the streets.

00:27:07Marc:But like probably pretty good, right?

00:27:08Guest:Yeah.

00:27:09Guest:Yeah.

00:27:09Guest:Great.

00:27:10Guest:I'm lucky as fuck, dude.

00:27:11Guest:In that world, I mean, I've been very lucky.

00:27:15Guest:Like, what have you sold?

00:27:16Guest:I've sold everything, man.

00:27:17Guest:Well, you want me to sell something?

00:27:18Guest:I'll sell it.

00:27:19Guest:But no, but I mean... The biggest campaign I had was IBM.

00:27:23Guest:Really?

00:27:24Guest:Yeah.

00:27:24Guest:I sold servers.

00:27:25Marc:Like, the big ones that like... And these are mostly nationals?

00:27:28Guest:Yeah.

00:27:28Marc:You made a fucking fortune in commercials.

00:27:30Guest:Well, that sort of died.

00:27:32Guest:You can't make that.

00:27:32Guest:I mean, I started.

00:27:34Marc:Has everything died?

00:27:35Guest:Yes.

00:27:36Marc:No matter who you talk to about what you're talking about, it's not the same anymore.

00:27:40Guest:No, when I started, I was like the two years after I started were like the last two years of the real money, and then it went away.

00:27:46Guest:Because cable, it's cheaper to put them on cable than as many people see it, so you can get the same effect with 10% of the cost.

00:27:51Marc:Right.

00:27:52Marc:Yeah.

00:27:53Marc:Okay, so you did the 7-Up commercial, and then you got an agent, and that was that.

00:27:56Guest:Yeah.

00:27:57Guest:Man, it started working.

00:27:59Marc:Yeah.

00:27:59Marc:Any good ones?

00:28:01Marc:I mean, how do you rationalize commercials?

00:28:03Marc:You don't give a fuck?

00:28:04Marc:I don't.

00:28:05Guest:It's never entered your mind.

00:28:07Guest:The thing that there was a great way to learn how to act because I never felt pressure.

00:28:11Guest:Because in my head, I was like, am I honestly going to bring down General Motors if I fuck this up?

00:28:15Guest:Like, is Taco Bell's going to shutter its doors because I'm a shitty actor?

00:28:19Guest:So I never felt any pressure on set at all.

00:28:22Guest:I mean, I was nervous I was going to forget lines or whatever, but I was never like, oh, God, what's going to happen?

00:28:27Guest:I just was like, I can't fuck this up.

00:28:30Guest:So it was a great way to just learn how to be on a set and stand on the tape.

00:28:33Marc:Yeah, if you fucked up, they'd be like, we can't use you.

00:28:35Guest:Yeah, you did.

00:28:36Guest:They literally, there was always a guy standing off to the side that if I fucked up enough, he looked just like me and he just walked to where I was standing and he would do it.

00:28:44Guest:It's happened before.

00:28:44Guest:It'll happen again.

00:28:45Guest:It has happened before?

00:28:46Guest:Yeah.

00:28:48Guest:This is like, you're not doing it.

00:28:49Guest:There's always like alternate, like, um, we're going to have him try to do that line.

00:28:51Guest:And then you're like, oh, and you don't end up in the commercial.

00:28:54Guest:That's it?

00:28:54Guest:You're out?

00:28:54Guest:Yeah, you're out.

00:28:55Marc:So you never had any sort of fights of conscience about selling something?

00:29:01Guest:I mean, I have, but at the time it was a very real means to an end.

00:29:06Guest:I needed to pay for art school.

00:29:08Guest:My art school was exceptionally expensive.

00:29:10Guest:I was going to have a ton of debt.

00:29:12Guest:And it was like, and at that time I was starting to want to do gallery stuff.

00:29:17Guest:Yeah.

00:29:17Guest:And I was like, well, I can either do illustrations for things I don't like.

00:29:22Guest:Right.

00:29:22Guest:Or I can just let them use my face, which I don't give a shit about anyways.

00:29:26Guest:Yeah.

00:29:26Guest:And that'll keep me from, I mean, doing a bad illustration hurts my heart worse than being in a commercial.

00:29:33Guest:Really?

00:29:34Guest:Yeah.

00:29:34Marc:Like having to draw something.

00:29:35Guest:Because you're drawing it.

00:29:36Guest:Yeah.

00:29:38Guest:It feels so bad.

00:29:40Guest:Like what?

00:29:41Yeah.

00:29:41Guest:I mean, I had to do an article for a magazine and this article was, someone wrote an article about learning to alter pants in college and how that was a transformative experience because she altered her pants.

00:29:53Guest:And when her mom came to visit, she thought she was so weird and crazy because she'd put these multicolored patterns inside her pants.

00:29:59Guest:And so I'm doing, I'm at home for eight hours or more than that, drawing a pair of jeans with like, I'm trying to figure out a metal, like so things are exploding off the seams and I got eyeballs with teardrops that are sewing needles and I'm just like, I want to take this brush and put it as far into my ear as I can so I hopefully die before this thing's done.

00:30:18Guest:For 300 bucks.

00:30:20Guest:That hurts because you have to finish the drawing no matter how you feel about it.

00:30:26Guest:Whereas I can start phoning in on a commercial.

00:30:28Guest:I can work my way out of that screen time real easily if I feel bad.

00:30:32Marc:Yeah.

00:30:33Marc:Like, what do you mean?

00:30:34Guest:You can just start acting bad and then you're not going to make that cut.

00:30:36Guest:You ever done that?

00:30:38Yeah.

00:30:39Guest:So you get paid and you get out.

00:30:42Guest:Well, you get paid for the day.

00:30:43Marc:You're just not going to end up in the... But what would cause that kind of situation where you're like, oh, fuck this.

00:30:48Guest:You know what I tend to really tense up?

00:30:50Guest:When commercials try to create their own new cool phrases, I'm like, I'm not going to.

00:30:56Guest:Let's work our way out of this one.

00:30:59Guest:Or if it's for food, I just smile a lot and my teeth are of a nature that they're not going to want to put that on screen.

00:31:05Marc:So you're okay with just a day?

00:31:06Guest:Every food commercial has what's called the bite and smile.

00:31:09Guest:Yeah, right.

00:31:09Guest:And you bite, you take a bite, you swallow it and you smile.

00:31:12Guest:And that's where I can get out of that job real easy.

00:31:16Guest:Game over.

00:31:17Guest:They don't like your teeth?

00:31:18Guest:They're just not what they call all American enough.

00:31:20Guest:They're not attractive teeth.

00:31:21Guest:They're not attractive.

00:31:22Guest:I've heard they're distracting.

00:31:23Marc:Yeah.

00:31:24Marc:So then, okay, so when did you start getting real roles in TV and movies?

00:31:30Guest:Probably five years, maybe four years after I started doing commercials.

00:31:35Guest:I got a real manager.

00:31:37Guest:My friends were in this band called Eve Six and I would hang out at their video shoots and their manager would see me making a jerk out of myself and he'd see me in commercial and he was like, you've done a commercial?

00:31:46Guest:I said, yeah.

00:31:46Guest:He's like, how many have you done?

00:31:48Guest:And I said, 10.

00:31:48Guest:And he said, in how long?

00:31:49Guest:And I was like, eight months.

00:31:50Guest:And he was like, will you come to my office on Monday?

00:31:52Guest:And then he was the greatest guy in the world, who's now not alive, named Stu Sobel.

00:31:57Guest:And he became my manager and he got me a theatrical agent and I started working basically right away.

00:32:02Marc:And that was before comedy?

00:32:04Marc:Yeah.

00:32:05Marc:So you met Bobby Lee?

00:32:06Guest:I met Bobby Lee on a commercial set.

00:32:08Marc:That was a life changer?

00:32:09Guest:Basically.

00:32:10Guest:And I said, I want to be a comedian.

00:32:12Guest:Yeah.

00:32:13Guest:I said, I want to be a comedian.

00:32:14Guest:He told me he was a comedian.

00:32:15Guest:And then I went and saw him at the store on Thursday and he killed, and I was like, this is it.

00:32:20Guest:How long ago was that?

00:32:20Guest:Probably 10 years.

00:32:21Marc:So the same act that he's doing now?

00:32:27Marc:How many jokes do you remember from that act?

00:32:30Marc:I remember a lot.

00:32:30Marc:I remember a lot of it.

00:32:31Marc:The selling corn joke.

00:32:33Marc:He's going to hate me.

00:32:35Marc:No, he doesn't do that joke anymore.

00:32:36Guest:No, he doesn't.

00:32:37Guest:And it was weird.

00:32:38Guest:I remember distinctly being in the original room and I was like, uh-oh, I belong here.

00:32:45Guest:So you were a store guy in your blood.

00:32:47Guest:Yeah.

00:32:48Guest:I was like, oh, fuck, why do I feel this way?

00:32:50Guest:I was like, oh, no.

00:32:52Guest:I mean, I literally was like, I want that.

00:32:53Guest:Like, I was watching him kill, and I was like, I want that.

00:32:56Guest:I want to kill this room.

00:32:58Guest:And so then I met with him like a month later.

00:33:00Guest:Or no, less than that.

00:33:01Guest:And I was like, I had these jokes, and we went over.

00:33:04Guest:He's like, let's go over your jokes.

00:33:06Guest:And I think I talked for three seconds.

00:33:07Guest:He's like, your jokes don't matter.

00:33:08Guest:So come Sunday.

00:33:10Guest:You're going to get three minutes Sunday and Monday.

00:33:11Guest:And I was like, oh, I don't know.

00:33:12Guest:He goes, if you don't show up, I'll never help you again.

00:33:15Guest:So I went, and he introduced me to Ari Shfir, who was hosting, and that was that.

00:33:19Marc:So Bobby was your guy.

00:33:22Guest:He pushed you in.

00:33:23Guest:He really did.

00:33:23Guest:And Ari was there.

00:33:24Guest:So that's your... Bobby and Ari were my guys because Ari was cool about... I wouldn't bug him.

00:33:30Guest:I would just show up to the open mics.

00:33:32Guest:I'd be like, I'm here.

00:33:33Guest:And then I'd just wait.

00:33:34Guest:And I never would go up to him and ask.

00:33:36Guest:So if there was an open spot, he put me on.

00:33:37Guest:And I got on a lot.

00:33:38Marc:So that was what?

00:33:39Marc:That was 11 years ago?

00:33:40Marc:Yeah.

00:33:41Marc:So Ari was the guy.

00:33:42Marc:So that was the generation because when I was there...

00:33:44Marc:Barris was the guy, kinda.

00:33:46Marc:I can't remember who used to run those open mics, but there's always one comic.

00:33:49Guest:Ari was the guy for a while when I first started there.

00:33:51Guest:He really was.

00:33:52Marc:The weird thing about the generational difference between me being there in the late 80s and whoever's there now, it's the same dynamic.

00:33:59Marc:There's something about the comedy store that it's insulated, it's a crew, the inmates run the asylum to a certain degree.

00:34:06Guest:It's a prison mentality.

00:34:08Guest:To a certain degree.

00:34:09Guest:You're just trying to become the hammer.

00:34:10Guest:Yeah.

00:34:10Marc:And at that time, like, so was Bobby still opening for Carlos or what?

00:34:16Guest:Yeah, Bobby was opening for Carlos.

00:34:17Guest:The group that I started, it was like the employees were like Ari, Renanzizi, David Taylor, Mishevitz, Steve Simone, those guys.

00:34:27Guest:And those were kind of like my guys.

00:34:28Guest:They were there before me probably a couple years or a year or so.

00:34:31Guest:Yeah.

00:34:31Guest:But that became my group.

00:34:33Guest:Yeah.

00:34:33Guest:Natasha Leggero was just starting at the time there.

00:34:36Marc:yeah and that became like my group and who like what was the the uh what were the stories i mean what was going on because you're you know you're like a guy like i was there for two years not even at a different point in my life and you know it became part of my soul yeah but you've been there through all kinds of fucked up bullshit well when i first got there it was in a bad place i mean it was like that place was falling apart the lineups were fucking weird like who

00:35:02Guest:I mean, it'd be like half decent and then a shit show.

00:35:07Guest:I'm not going to name names.

00:35:08Marc:But like guys from the old days, you mean?

00:35:10Guest:Yeah, people's name I don't even remember.

00:35:12Guest:Sure.

00:35:12Guest:Not even guys that have been headliners.

00:35:14Guest:And so there was an open mic three days of the week.

00:35:16Guest:That's how small the crowd was on Tuesdays.

00:35:19Guest:So it was just like, it was really like you could do whatever you wanted because it didn't matter.

00:35:23Guest:I mean, we had a night where we did each other's acts.

00:35:25Guest:We drew names and like did each other's.

00:35:27Guest:I did James Painter's act.

00:35:29Guest:Yeah.

00:35:29Guest:Which I did better with his act than I was doing with mine by far.

00:35:33Guest:That's where Joe Rogan first, I think, met me because I did a solid impression of Painter.

00:35:36Guest:He was like, that impression was really nice, really good.

00:35:38Guest:Really good, dude.

00:35:40Marc:But who were the big guys there then?

00:35:41Marc:Rogan yet?

00:35:42Guest:Rogan and Mencia.

00:35:45Guest:Yeah.

00:35:46Guest:And Freddie Soto.

00:35:48Guest:Oh, yeah.

00:35:48Guest:Dice was around quite a bit.

00:35:50Guest:Yeah.

00:35:52Guest:But no crowds.

00:35:53Guest:No crowds.

00:35:54Guest:I mean, I wasn't there on the weekends, but no crowds to speak of.

00:35:57Guest:But it was like a dark time.

00:35:59Guest:It was dark.

00:35:59Guest:The thing was, it was free as shit.

00:36:01Guest:Yeah.

00:36:02Guest:You could bomb every single... No one ever said a word to you if you bombed.

00:36:05Guest:You could try out personas and do a voice.

00:36:08Guest:I went up on stage with Ingram, and I was this hype man during one of my spots.

00:36:11Guest:What does that mean?

00:36:12Guest:He just pretended to rap, and I just stood behind him and went, yeah.

00:36:15Guest:You could do anything you wanted all the time.

00:36:18Marc:Who was booking the place?

00:36:19Marc:There was no one running the show?

00:36:21Marc:Duncan Trestle?

00:36:22Guest:Yeah, which he was just putting the same line up every week because he didn't care and pretending Mitzi was doing it.

00:36:27Marc:That's what everyone seems to do.

00:36:29Guest:Yeah, it's like, ah, Mitzi gave you the spot.

00:36:31Guest:He was one of those guys, he would say that?

00:36:33Guest:Well, because, dude, people get it.

00:36:34Guest:If you're the booker, and Duncan's such a nice dude, people would get on him.

00:36:38Marc:He got me on the wall.

00:36:39Marc:I mean, like, I wouldn't be on that wall if it weren't for donkeys.

00:36:42Marc:Like, you shouldn't be on the wall.

00:36:44Marc:Yeah.

00:36:44Guest:I mean, it was that, that time at the store was really interesting.

00:36:48Marc:Because, like, she was losing her mind already, and no one was really in charge.

00:36:52Marc:No one was in charge.

00:36:53Marc:Yeah.

00:36:54Guest:No one was in charge.

00:36:57Guest:It was fucking great.

00:36:59Guest:Ari was in charge, ostensibly.

00:37:01Guest:I mean, literally, the door guys were in charge.

00:37:04Guest:That's amazing.

00:37:04Guest:It was so great.

00:37:06Guest:You could do, I mean, it was like one of those things where, like, I would show up to the open mic and Renazizi was like, we think you've gotten a lot better, so you're going to follow Painter tonight.

00:37:15Guest:Like, who made this decision, you guys?

00:37:17Ha!

00:37:17Guest:They're putting me on at whatever time they want.

00:37:19Guest:Just a random group of comics deciding the lineup?

00:37:21Guest:Yeah.

00:37:22Guest:Oh, my God.

00:37:23Guest:It was so great.

00:37:25Guest:I mean, they're deciding the lineup on Sundays and Mondays, but it was still fantastic.

00:37:28Marc:Yeah.

00:37:29Marc:And then what happened?

00:37:31Marc:It seems like everything's gotten organized.

00:37:33Guest:Yeah, I mean, you know, I don't know.

00:37:35Guest:It's tried to become a fucking business, which I don't know.

00:37:38Marc:Yeah, I don't know who said it.

00:37:38Guest:Well, there was a new influx of guys.

00:37:41Guest:A lot of guys showed up that were really good, so it became like a, you know, the lineups were better.

00:37:46Guest:People started showing up, and it kind of like, some people, they decided to try to run it.

00:37:50Marc:So it seems like it's going all right over there.

00:37:52Marc:Yeah, seems like it.

00:37:53Marc:Right, right?

00:37:53Guest:I'm not there a ton, but yeah.

00:37:55Marc:Yeah, I hardly go at all.

00:37:56Marc:I mean, I'll go down on weekends occasionally now, but I can't do the during the week thing.

00:38:01Marc:That fucking OR still, both of those rooms still bother me.

00:38:04Guest:I feel as, I think, comfortable as you can in that room, which is still not.

00:38:08Guest:It's a hard room.

00:38:09Guest:The original room's a hard room.

00:38:10Guest:It makes other rooms easy, though.

00:38:11Marc:But you must have seen some shit.

00:38:12Marc:Were you around when all that shit was going down?

00:38:14Guest:Yeah, when Ari beat up Bobby and they put shit on Bobby's car.

00:38:19Marc:I didn't know that one.

00:38:20Guest:I think Bobby ratted somebody out.

00:38:23Guest:About what?

00:38:24Guest:I don't know, something.

00:38:26Guest:He tattled on somebody and so they put shit on Bobby's windshield wipers and turned them on so when he got in the car and put the key in, smeared shit across his windshield.

00:38:36Guest:And then Painter, James Painter, he quit before he came back.

00:38:41Guest:He quit comedy.

00:38:42Guest:Yeah, which is a shame because he was tremendous.

00:38:43Guest:Really?

00:38:43Guest:He was the guy everyone went in to watch.

00:38:45Guest:Really?

00:38:45Guest:Yeah.

00:38:46Marc:What happened to that guy?

00:38:47Guest:And I asked him once, or Ari asked him, he said, I did not enjoy doing stand-up as much as other people seem to enjoy it.

00:38:54Marc:Yeah.

00:38:54Guest:And he told me, before he quit, he started out this persona called Lettuce Patch, which was like a Carrot Top parody, and it was really weird and dark and dirty and fake blood and stuff.

00:39:03Guest:And I was like, you've got to stop doing this.

00:39:04Guest:And he goes, it's too painful to bomb as myself.

00:39:06Marc:Oh, my God.

00:39:07Guest:And then he just stopped.

00:39:08Marc:And where was he from?

00:39:09Marc:I think he's from Arizona.

00:39:10Marc:So he's like this myth now.

00:39:12Guest:He is a myth.

00:39:13Guest:It's weird to me that people don't know who he is at the store because he's mythical.

00:39:16Yeah.

00:39:16Marc:Well, there's a lot of that at the store.

00:39:17Marc:Yeah.

00:39:18Marc:People like, you know, these people that came and went.

00:39:20Marc:It's just like, you don't understand, man.

00:39:22Guest:You weren't there.

00:39:23Guest:Yeah.

00:39:23Marc:It's that kind of a thing.

00:39:24Marc:So he was there for what, a couple years?

00:39:26Guest:He was there for like five years.

00:39:27Guest:And then just a few, some things happened.

00:39:29Guest:Like after I became a regular there, he just started, it just got a little weird, but he was a funny guy, man.

00:39:35Marc:Wow, man.

00:39:36Marc:Yeah.

00:39:36Marc:Who's that other guy?

00:39:37Marc:What's that guy that used to come around and do Carson monologues?

00:39:41Marc:Bob Abravaya?

00:39:43Guest:William Abravaya.

00:39:44Marc:William Abravaya.

00:39:45Guest:Richard William Abravaya?

00:39:45Guest:Yeah.

00:39:46Guest:Tinfoil hat?

00:39:47Guest:Yeah.

00:39:47Guest:He's still around.

00:39:48Guest:He is?

00:39:48Guest:I still see him, man.

00:39:49Guest:He's still on the Ding Dong Show.

00:39:50Marc:Yeah?

00:39:50Marc:Yeah.

00:39:51Marc:What is that about?

00:39:52Marc:I gotta talk to Don Barris.

00:39:55Guest:You know, I think that's just an experiment in humanism.

00:39:58Guest:It's just like, here's the tapestry.

00:40:00Guest:You think you've seen the full tapestry, you haven't.

00:40:02Guest:Of people.

00:40:03Guest:Of people.

00:40:04Guest:It's about people.

00:40:06Marc:But it's good hearted.

00:40:08Guest:You know, I think at first I was like, this is mean.

00:40:11Guest:But on a Monday, that group of people have something to do that they probably enjoy more than what the other options they'd have.

00:40:17Guest:Yeah.

00:40:18Guest:And so who's to say?

00:40:19Guest:Right.

00:40:20Guest:Don's their dad, kind of.

00:40:21Guest:And that's, you know, that's what it is.

00:40:23Marc:When I met Don, he was like sleeping in the main room.

00:40:25Marc:Yeah.

00:40:25Marc:Kind of.

00:40:26Guest:what's some of the best things you saw at that fucking place you know what's interesting I miss I have a like anytime something good happened I was I left early really I'm definitely that dude I was like I was in like a long term relationship so I was like on my way home and I'd hear about it I missed a lot of stuff

00:40:43Marc:Isn't that weird about the girls?

00:40:44Marc:Yeah, I try not to fester on that being the reason why I'm not at the comedy store on a Tuesday, but it's probably got a lot to do with it.

00:40:51Marc:You have more time to hang out when you're single.

00:40:53Marc:I mean, I hang out a lot now.

00:40:55Marc:Oh, yeah, so it's back at it.

00:40:56Marc:Yeah, back at it.

00:40:57Marc:That finished off, huh?

00:40:59Marc:Yeah.

00:40:59Marc:Was that ugly?

00:41:00Guest:No, not at all.

00:41:01Guest:We're friends.

00:41:02Guest:Really?

00:41:03Guest:Yeah.

00:41:03Guest:How the fuck does that happen?

00:41:05Guest:I don't know.

00:41:05Guest:I'm a friendly dude.

00:41:07Guest:Really?

00:41:08Guest:Yeah.

00:41:08Guest:I mean, I don't, you know, I don't know.

00:41:10Guest:I don't blame them for leaving me.

00:41:12Guest:Wow.

00:41:14Guest:God, that's magnanimous.

00:41:16Guest:I don't think they're wrong.

00:41:19Guest:When I look at it on paper, I'm like, yeah, that makes sense.

00:41:22Guest:You saw the whole field there for a minute?

00:41:27Guest:I'm working it out.

00:41:27Guest:Me and my therapist are on top of it.

00:41:29Guest:You got the therapist going?

00:41:30Guest:Yeah.

00:41:31Guest:How's that going?

00:41:32Guest:Good.

00:41:33Guest:I needed it.

00:41:34Guest:I needed one.

00:41:35Marc:Do you know what you're working on?

00:41:38Guest:Yeah, I do.

00:41:39Guest:I know I can write it down.

00:41:42Guest:Really?

00:41:42Marc:Can you draw a picture of it a thousand times?

00:41:44Guest:And you want me to do a portrait of my dad?

00:41:48Marc:Well, that was a difficult time.

00:41:51Marc:Yeah, man.

00:41:52Marc:What happened with that?

00:41:53Guest:My father went hiking and a storm happened upon him quickly and he wasn't able to find his way home and he froze to death.

00:42:10Guest:And they couldn't find him.

00:42:11Marc:It's just horrendous.

00:42:13Marc:Was he an avid hiker type of guy?

00:42:16Marc:He's kind of an outdoorsy guy.

00:42:18Marc:Because that went on for like months, right?

00:42:19Guest:Yeah, it took a while to find him, yeah.

00:42:21Guest:I'm sorry, man.

00:42:22Guest:Yeah, it was a... It was a rough time.

00:42:24Guest:Yeah, it was a bad... It was all bad.

00:42:27Guest:Yeah.

00:42:27Guest:It was all... There's no silver lining to that.

00:42:29Guest:Is your mom still around?

00:42:30Guest:Yeah, yeah.

00:42:32Guest:My mom and stepmom are showing around.

00:42:33Marc:Yeah, and like when you talk about, but you were okay with your dad at that time, right?

00:42:38Marc:My dad was a great dude.

00:42:40Marc:Yeah.

00:42:41Marc:So most of the stuff you're working on is grief?

00:42:43Marc:Yeah, how to not let it turn into rage.

00:42:46Marc:Right.

00:42:46Marc:Yeah.

00:42:47Marc:Right, the elements that conspired against you.

00:42:50Marc:Yeah.

00:42:51Marc:Yeah.

00:42:51Marc:How's everybody else dealing with it?

00:42:54Marc:It's all bad, man.

00:42:55Marc:It's not.

00:42:56Marc:It's no good.

00:42:57Guest:Your dad freezes to death under a rock.

00:42:59Guest:It's not easy to compartmentalize that into something useful.

00:43:03Marc:Oh, no.

00:43:05Marc:I'm sorry, man.

00:43:06Marc:I know.

00:43:07Marc:So, like, because my dad...

00:43:10Marc:He's still alive and he aggravates me constantly.

00:43:12Marc:Yeah.

00:43:13Marc:But I can't imagine what is it about the feelings is just the injustice of it primarily?

00:43:20Guest:Yeah, that's what I deal with a lot is the unfairness I feel towards it.

00:43:24Guest:And I mean, it was him.

00:43:26Guest:I had just a succession of things.

00:43:28Guest:Yeah.

00:43:28Guest:A lot of people I really loved died in succession and they were all great people.

00:43:35Guest:There wasn't any villains.

00:43:36Guest:Like friends?

00:43:37Guest:That manager I talked about, Stu, and then John Hughes, people that I loved.

00:43:45Marc:John Hughes, the director?

00:43:46Marc:Yeah.

00:43:47Marc:He was a friend of yours?

00:43:50Guest:Mm-hmm.

00:43:51Guest:After my dad passed away, John just called me up and was like, there's some things you're not going to know that you would ask your dad, and you can call me and just ask me those things.

00:44:01Guest:wow yeah did you do that yeah i needed to plant a tree i didn't know what kind he knows a lot about indigenous trees and what kind you should plant just like home renovation stuff really man shit yeah best guy ever well how'd you develop that relationship he um the first movie i was ever in he produced his son wrote and uh we me him and his son became really good friends and had a book company together for a little while a book company we did uh illustrated short stories

00:44:27Marc:Oh, really?

00:44:28Guest:Yeah, it was called Broken Wrist Project.

00:44:30Marc:And are they out there in the world?

00:44:32Guest:I mean, they were.

00:44:33Guest:We don't do it anymore.

00:44:35Guest:They're still available?

00:44:37Guest:I have them.

00:44:39Guest:I got a bunch.

00:44:40Marc:So John Hughes was just your buddy?

00:44:42Guest:Yeah.

00:44:42Guest:oh man i mean that's one of those things i'll never really understand how i was that lucky yeah it was just like i still it was the weirdest like when your cell phone lights up and it says john hughes was weird as hell yeah or like an email because you what you grew up we grew up with his movies yeah i mean just just getting getting to go to illinois on a plane i was like what the hell am i doing here it was like that and he was just like it like whatever you want him to be he's that times but way way more also

00:45:07Marc:But, like, I'm trying to remember that, like, his big movies were, was it The Breakfast Club?

00:45:11Guest:Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles, Ferris Bueller, Planes, Trains, and Automobiles, a masterpiece.

00:45:15Marc:Yeah.

00:45:16Guest:Masterpiece.

00:45:17Guest:I can't watch it.

00:45:18Guest:It's too sad.

00:45:18Guest:It hurts me.

00:45:20Guest:Because of him?

00:45:21Guest:Just in general.

00:45:21Guest:I mean, that movie hits you right in the heart of, like, being a man.

00:45:24Guest:Like, I like my wife.

00:45:25Guest:My wife likes me.

00:45:26Guest:Like, you're like, God damn it!

00:45:28Guest:stop it do you have these like man issues do you feel like like because i went out and bought some wire this morning i do i definitely do i have man issues but do you think that you're like there was more for your dad to teach you along those lines yeah i definitely feel like there i feel confused a lot of stuff where i'm like fuck i would know i don't who do i ask all the men there's not a no one's left

00:45:52Guest:Right.

00:45:52Guest:And I'm just, I know I'm in the weeds on certain things.

00:45:55Guest:Call Al.

00:45:56Guest:Al's pretty easy.

00:45:56Guest:You know, I will tell you no shit when I had to buy a car, you know who went with me?

00:46:00Guest:Al Madrill.

00:46:01Guest:Yeah, yeah.

00:46:02Guest:That dude is as close to a new father as I have, for sure.

00:46:05Guest:For all of us.

00:46:06Guest:For all of us.

00:46:06Guest:Yeah, I don't know how.

00:46:07Marc:That guy's dad gear is so, it's crazy.

00:46:09Marc:tremendous i don't know what the hell it is with him like you know i can't fucking pull it together to get you know i have to paint my house yeah you know and there's a few things well i've got a guy no he's got a guy but not only that you go to his house and he's like you know he's got two kids he's got a pretty hot career and it's like i just planted some trees i'm like what the fuck do you mean you just planted trees i don't get it man

00:46:30Marc:Where does he find the time?

00:46:31Marc:He's like a dad superhero.

00:46:33Marc:He is.

00:46:34Marc:I don't use him enough because he's busy.

00:46:36Marc:He's in New York a lot.

00:46:38Marc:And every time I talk to him, I get this weird thing that like, not unlike a dad, that you talk to him and you get off the phone and you're like, I'm a fucking idiot.

00:46:47Guest:You're like, my ducks could not be less in a row.

00:46:51Guest:My car got the boot yesterday.

00:46:52Guest:Like, I don't know what the fuck I'm doing.

00:46:54Marc:Really?

00:46:54Marc:You don't pay your tickets?

00:46:55Marc:I got a boot.

00:46:57Yeah.

00:46:57Guest:that's just crazy well it went on long enough and i was getting all these letters i couldn't organize i was like this is just a bunch of serial numbers i don't and i was like you know what i'm just gonna wait i'll get the boot i'll fix it in a day and that's exactly what happened they gave me the boot i went took two hours my car paid it all off they're all gone now i paid them all in one stop completely worth so that was your plan basically it became my plan it's too out of control i'm just gonna have to wait this out i can't catch all these bees at once yeah let's wait till they get in the hive and then ask for money

00:47:23Marc:But I'm trying to figure out, like, well, there's certain other things, like, too, like, with me, because my dad was pretty absent, but, like, I had no idea how to buy a house.

00:47:30Guest:It all makes me very stressed out.

00:47:32Guest:Luckily, before I bought a house, my dad was alive.

00:47:34Guest:That was the last thing he sort of helped me do right before he died.

00:47:38Guest:But you had problems with the house.

00:47:39Guest:Oh, yeah, it fell down as soon as I bought it.

00:47:42Guest:It was the last thing he helped me with.

00:47:44Guest:It may have been a mistake.

00:47:46Marc:But when you told me that story, I mean, what the fuck happened with that?

00:47:49Marc:There was all this LA history about Silver Lake that I didn't know.

00:47:53Guest:What exactly happened?

00:47:54Guest:I bought a house that by all rights was probably a hunting shack.

00:47:58Guest:And when I went to add on, it was a very small house and I wanted to add on.

00:48:02Guest:Smaller than mine?

00:48:02Guest:Yeah.

00:48:03Guest:This house was like 900 square feet.

00:48:04Guest:So I bought it and I wanted to add on like a kitchen because the driveway was huge.

00:48:08Guest:And when they opened it up, they were like, we can't attach new house to this because it's too flimsy.

00:48:12Guest:If there's an earthquake, the new part will knock the old part over.

00:48:16Guest:So they had to tear it down completely.

00:48:19Marc:There was no, like it wasn't a house?

00:48:21Guest:No, it was built.

00:48:21Guest:I'm not kidding you.

00:48:22Guest:It was one by threes.

00:48:24Guest:There was six two by fours in the front of the house and that was it.

00:48:26Guest:It was insulated with posters for like wheat.

00:48:31Guest:I have one.

00:48:31Guest:It's like Wheatums.

00:48:33Guest:Like a 1950s poster for wheat and like newspapers shoved in the walls.

00:48:36Guest:Like this thing was like a no building code Los Angeles special where people were just renovating it at night by themselves.

00:48:44Guest:And it just had to be completely torn down.

00:48:46Guest:I had to just build a new house.

00:48:47Guest:Did you?

00:48:48Guest:Yeah.

00:48:49Guest:Awful.

00:48:49Guest:Just ate all my plans and just crushed it.

00:48:53Guest:And then the problem was my dad wasn't around.

00:48:55Guest:That was the, you know.

00:48:58Marc:So you could both be disappointed in the choice you made?

00:49:00Guest:I was in the weeds, man.

00:49:01Guest:Yeah?

00:49:02Guest:Just standing on a dirt lot going, what?

00:49:05Guest:There was a day where just, there was like, you know, four days before there was a house, then four days later there was no house.

00:49:10Guest:And I was like, what the fuck happened here, man?

00:49:12Guest:What is happening?

00:49:14Guest:I'm just standing in a dirt driver with a hammer, being lied to on a daily basis by contractors.

00:49:19Guest:Well, did you have someone design you a house?

00:49:21Guest:Yeah, I picked an architect who designed the house in the wrong place and then had to redesign it, which took an extra two months, cost me a fortune.

00:49:29Guest:Got the architect from Al.

00:49:30Marc:Oh, yeah?

00:49:31Marc:An Alcatect?

00:49:32Marc:An Alcatect.

00:49:34Marc:Ha ha!

00:49:34Guest:Yeah.

00:49:35Guest:Yeah, man.

00:49:37Marc:So it was just not... Because I got some dude, some fan who's like some arty architect.

00:49:42Guest:The thing about these dudes... In general?

00:49:44Guest:Dude, I mean, look.

00:49:47Guest:Construction's the only industry you can work in with a lot of felonies.

00:49:51Guest:Yeah.

00:49:51Guest:So, I mean, you're either dealing with a God-fearing immigrant who works his ass off but you can't talk to because of language barrier or a former meth addict who has at least one felony and might be a white supremacist.

00:50:07Guest:Yeah.

00:50:07Guest:I fired a white supremacist.

00:50:08Guest:He showed up to my house to build a house.

00:50:10Guest:He showed up in pants.

00:50:10Guest:The next day he showed up with an SS tattoo in his cap.

00:50:12Guest:I was like, we're good.

00:50:13Guest:I think I'm going to wait.

00:50:14Guest:I did that thing where I was like, you know, I'm going to wait and see what the market does.

00:50:18Guest:I was just like, get away from me, man.

00:50:20Yeah.

00:50:20Marc:I had a guy who was an ex-bull rider.

00:50:24Guest:Look, they are an interesting group.

00:50:29Guest:You get great stories.

00:50:30Guest:There was a dude that worked on my house named Vinko, Eastern European dude.

00:50:33Guest:I think he was Romanian.

00:50:34Guest:And the lead contractor guy was telling me, I was joking about it.

00:50:39Guest:I was like, what do we do if someone comes in and tries to steal shit?

00:50:41Guest:Because one night I was in the garage painting, and a guy came into the framing of the house and was trying to scavenge for stuff to steal.

00:50:47Guest:Like copper wiring?

00:50:48Guest:shit or i think he's trying to steal hammers and me and him had to have like a we had a confrontation who you knew the guy the guy no no it was like a neighborhood dude oh he just it was like 10 at night and i saw a flashlight in the framing of the house that was being built i was in the garage working because i was painting in there and i see a flashlight and i know this isn't good yeah so i have a it's not it wasn't a hammer it's like a pickaxe yeah and i go in there and i i'm like all right you need to yell at this guy so i'm like what the fuck

00:51:13Guest:are you doing and i yell at him and it come out that awkward yeah it was there's no way it was threatening on any level it was just loud it probably sounded like a loud screech of fear yeah yeah yeah and so i'm like what the fuck and i yell at him and i get in there and i look and he's basically retarded like head scar retarded and i like i'm like get the fuck out of him and i hit you in the head and he goes go ahead i don't care

00:51:37Guest:And at that point, I realized, you can't hit this dude in the head.

00:51:40Guest:You'll get on the news.

00:51:41Guest:Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:51:42Guest:So I'm like, just leave.

00:51:43Guest:And he lives around the corner.

00:51:44Guest:I see him all the time.

00:51:45Guest:He lives in the back of someone's house.

00:51:46Guest:He just scavenged us for stuff to sell at Yards Hills, I think.

00:51:49Marc:Do you see him now?

00:51:50Guest:I see him almost every day.

00:51:52Marc:So it's okay, because he was- Yeah, it's cool.

00:51:55Guest:He seemed problem.

00:51:56Guest:He had a problem.

00:51:58Guest:He's not hurting.

00:51:58Guest:I mean, you know, he was probably looking for a hammer to sell.

00:52:01Marc:But are you happy with the house now?

00:52:02Marc:Yeah.

00:52:02Guest:Yeah.

00:52:02Guest:I mean, I'm as happy as I can be knowing what every square inch costs.

00:52:06Marc:Did you build a little bigger house?

00:52:07Marc:Yeah.

00:52:09Marc:Uh-huh.

00:52:10Marc:Because like I said, I've got this fan who's a fancy architect working at a big firm designing kind of groovy shit, and he's been bothering me to have coffee with him because he wants to design me a house, but that's a big fucking undertaking, isn't it?

00:52:23Marc:Dude, don't.

00:52:25Guest:It's awful.

00:52:26Guest:I will never even approach doing it again.

00:52:29Guest:Because it's bullshit.

00:52:30Guest:They just lie to you on a daily basis.

00:52:33Guest:Your contractor.

00:52:34Guest:To your face.

00:52:35Guest:Your contractor.

00:52:35Guest:Yes, every day.

00:52:36Marc:Well, the one thing I've noticed about contractors is generally, almost all of them, they're sort of learning as they go.

00:52:44Guest:Yeah.

00:52:44Marc:And like you're at some arc and there's no, like there's very few that are like, oh yeah, I've done everything.

00:52:49Marc:Yeah.

00:52:49Marc:They've done a few things twice.

00:52:51Marc:Yeah.

00:52:51Marc:And then they kind of fucking wing it.

00:52:53Marc:Yeah.

00:52:54Marc:And they just kind of eyeball shit.

00:52:56Guest:If they're great, you can't get them.

00:52:57Guest:Right.

00:52:57Guest:They're too busy.

00:52:58Guest:Right.

00:52:59Guest:I mean, so the ones you can get, especially like a small house, that's not a job any contractor cares about.

00:53:04Guest:There's not enough profit margin.

00:53:06Guest:So you're getting, you know.

00:53:07Marc:So you're saying don't buy a piece of property and build.

00:53:10Guest:Dude, why?

00:53:11Guest:There's a zombie apocalypse around the corner.

00:53:14Guest:Is it?

00:53:14Guest:I don't know, but dude, why?

00:53:16Guest:That system, I don't believe in that system anymore, man.

00:53:19Guest:Just get a house that's already existing.

00:53:21Guest:Yes!

00:53:22Marc:Well, I got a girl.

00:53:23Marc:She just wants to, she keeps bothering me.

00:53:24Guest:Okay.

00:53:25Guest:And you know what you're going to end up doing?

00:53:26Guest:You're going to end up screaming at each other over, over crown molding.

00:53:29Guest:Yeah.

00:53:30Guest:I have had screaming matches over the dumbest shit.

00:53:34Guest:White tile versus white tile.

00:53:36Guest:Yeah.

00:53:36Guest:I mean like copper versus nickel.

00:53:38Guest:It's the dumbest shit.

00:53:40Marc:Was that the end of the rope with you guys?

00:53:41Guest:No, I mean, look, a lot happened quick.

00:53:46Marc:Yeah?

00:53:46Guest:It was like a bad stretch in a row.

00:53:50Guest:We took all we could.

00:53:51Guest:Yeah?

00:53:52Guest:I always say our relationship was like a piece of driftwood.

00:53:54Guest:We were both hanging on to it after a shipwreck.

00:53:57Marc:But she rode that stuff out with your old man, though.

00:53:59Guest:Yeah, man.

00:54:00Guest:That's the thing, dude.

00:54:01Guest:She hung in there.

00:54:02Guest:I mean, while I'm asleep up there while they're looking for him, she would stay up and do our laundry so I'd have... I went up there wearing the clothes so I'd have an outfit to wear the next one.

00:54:12Marc:Because that went on for... You were just catatonic almost for like, well, how long did that wait, huh?

00:54:18Yeah.

00:54:18Guest:I mean, we were up there for 10 days while they were just looking, and then it took months.

00:54:22Guest:But yeah, I was a ghost for years.

00:54:23Marc:Yeah.

00:54:24Guest:For years?

00:54:25Guest:Yeah.

00:54:25Guest:How many years ago was that already?

00:54:26Guest:Five.

00:54:27Guest:Wow.

00:54:28Guest:But I mean, yeah, I think about it now, especially in terms of stand-up, and I was just a ghost up there.

00:54:34Marc:But you were doing it.

00:54:35Guest:Yeah, I got back at it right when I, Maren Azizi was like, are you gonna, he called me when I got home, he's like, you gonna go up?

00:54:43Guest:And I was like, yeah, he goes, good.

00:54:45Guest:Yeah.

00:54:45Guest:And I remember the first setback, Al, Al in the back of the room.

00:54:49Guest:Yeah.

00:54:49Guest:Yeah, come off stage, he's like, good man.

00:54:51Guest:Yeah, he was there, I don't even, he knew to be there.

00:54:54Guest:isn't it weird how we fucking take care of each other sometimes that's what I that's okay if there's anything about that that I can take that's positive the group of dudes who descended upon me yeah was pretty amazing first of all any dude whose dad was dead yeah was just like hey man like made eye contact like hey man you alright and like knew it and got it yeah you know I just guys I didn't know like Brett Ernst yeah I didn't know his dad was passed away guys like that were just like hey man

00:55:22Guest:what's up like i think i don't know if i knew dove davidoff well at all yeah and he think he hugged me in tears yeah you know it's just stuff like that you've realized what what certain people are made of in those situations and that was you know something yeah because i think we get like it's a weird thing we get this rap as being these weird kind of lonery sort you know comics show up when it matters

00:55:42Marc:Yeah, they're very sensitive dudes and they get it.

00:55:45Guest:Comic funerals are packed.

00:55:47Guest:We show up when it matters because we are conditioned.

00:55:51Guest:I think we're super sensitive so we know how bad a thing is so we can gauge why it's important that we be there.

00:55:59Guest:Al's not dumb.

00:56:00Guest:He knew I was going up for the first time after that happened and he was there to make sure I was okay.

00:56:05Marc:Yeah, how long did it take to get back up there?

00:56:08Guest:I went two days after I got home from them not finding him.

00:56:12Guest:Yeah.

00:56:13Guest:The first Saturday.

00:56:13Marc:Right, the first, 10 days after he disappeared.

00:56:16Guest:Yeah, I mean, the first Saturday I was in the OR.

00:56:18Marc:On some level, what else are you going to do, you know?

00:56:21Guest:I mean, honestly, I was lucky to have stand-up to do.

00:56:25Marc:Yeah.

00:56:26Guest:You need a distraction.

00:56:27Marc:Because you're not going to be able to sit and draw for no reason.

00:56:29Marc:No.

00:56:29Marc:Yeah.

00:56:30Guest:That's the thing.

00:56:31Guest:You're at home, sitting in a room alone for any reason, no matter what you planned on doing, doesn't go the way you think it's going to.

00:56:38Guest:because you're just going to be in grief.

00:56:39Guest:Yeah, you're just going to fall apart.

00:56:41Marc:Yeah.

00:56:42Marc:So the stand-up, like, you get out of yourself.

00:56:44Guest:Yeah, man.

00:56:44Guest:And to be able to, like, make people laugh was... I can't even gauge how lucky I was to have that.

00:56:50Marc:Well, you're also like a guy that, like, you know, you've got stuff.

00:56:55Marc:You know, you're not going to be like a guy who's going to go up there and start trying to process your father's disappearance on stage.

00:57:00Guest:I still can't.

00:57:02Guest:It's too big of a thing.

00:57:03Marc:Yeah, I mean, what are you gonna do?

00:57:04Marc:I mean, it's not really the type of stuff you do.

00:57:06Marc:It's not funny.

00:57:09Guest:Then when I think of the process of it, there was maybe one moment during the whole thing that was a tiny bit funny, but still wasn't.

00:57:15Marc:Right, right.

00:57:16Guest:What was that?

00:57:18Guest:My brother went up there, Jeff, to where he came up a couple days after my dad has appeared.

00:57:25Guest:And my brother's, I wouldn't say he's weird, but he's a little different.

00:57:28Guest:Yeah.

00:57:28Guest:And he's adopted.

00:57:29Guest:He doesn't look like me.

00:57:30Guest:He's Vietnamese.

00:57:30Guest:Yeah.

00:57:31Guest:So at one point, I knew all the search and read you guys.

00:57:33Guest:I was kind of like, not in charge, but kind of in charge.

00:57:35Guest:They would come to me with info.

00:57:37Guest:And he comes and goes, there's a guy who says he's your brother.

00:57:41Guest:And he keeps asking us if he can go on a helicopter ride.

00:57:44Guest:Yeah.

00:57:44Guest:And I was like, yeah, it's okay to tell him no.

00:57:49Guest:That was so great.

00:57:52Marc:Where did it happen?

00:57:53Guest:Green Valley Lake, which is basically next to Big Bear.

00:57:56Marc:Oh, wow.

00:57:57Guest:Yeah, close.

00:57:58Guest:I mean, that said, it wasn't their fault they couldn't find him.

00:58:01Marc:No, because a storm came in, right?

00:58:02Guest:That and the cell phone company gave him the wrong coordinates.

00:58:05Marc:Oh, really?

00:58:07Marc:Yeah.

00:58:07Marc:So that's how they were able to track him?

00:58:09Guest:Yeah, he was trying to, he made a couple calls.

00:58:11Guest:Like when he first got lost, he called and told him he was lost.

00:58:13Guest:And then, you know, his phone started dying.

00:58:15Guest:It's really spotty service.

00:58:17Guest:But then he would, you could see that he would try to make, you know, he tried to make a call at like 1 a.m.

00:58:21Guest:Didn't work.

00:58:21Guest:But you could gauge that.

00:58:23Guest:Right.

00:58:24Guest:You know, he tried, I think the last call he made was at like 1.

00:58:26Guest:And I think he kind of phone died or he, you know, realized what was going to happen.

00:58:30Guest:He knew a lot about hypothermia.

00:58:32Marc:So the cell phone company fucked up?

00:58:34Guest:I think so.

00:58:35Marc:Is that a big topic of rage?

00:58:39Guest:Yeah.

00:58:41Guest:We tried to sue him and lost.

00:58:43Marc:Oh, you did?

00:58:43Marc:Yeah.

00:58:44Marc:What company?

00:58:45Guest:Verizon.

00:58:46Guest:Yeah.

00:58:48Guest:Needless to say, I don't go for Verizon commercial auditions.

00:58:50Guest:That was a relatively easy line to draw with my representatives.

00:58:56Marc:So there's your line.

00:58:58Guest:Yeah, kill my dad.

00:58:59Guest:I'm not helping you sell phones.

00:59:01Guest:You pieces of shit.

00:59:02Guest:Go fuck yourself.

00:59:03Guest:Hope you die screaming.

00:59:04Marc:Awful, man.

00:59:06Marc:Yeah.

00:59:07Marc:Like, where's the comedy at?

00:59:08Marc:Are you headlining or what are you doing?

00:59:09Guest:I'm not headlining.

00:59:10Guest:No?

00:59:11Guest:No.

00:59:12Marc:Why?

00:59:13Marc:I don't know.

00:59:14Marc:No one's asked.

00:59:16Marc:Do you have, like, because, I mean, that's the other question about, you know, the kind of career you design for yourself, that you've got this, you know, full career in commercials, you're doing bit parts on TV shows and stuff, and you've got a good solid half hour, but you don't seem to have that, like, you know, I've got to get out there.

00:59:30Guest:Well, I mean, I have to stay here a lot to just work.

00:59:34Guest:Right.

00:59:34Guest:That's how I support myself.

00:59:35Guest:So I'm not able to go on the road a lot.

00:59:38Guest:I'm starting to try to do it more now because I feel better about my, like I said, I mean, I wasn't, for a few years after that happened, I wasn't like progressing.

00:59:49Guest:I was just doing an act.

00:59:50Guest:Yeah.

00:59:50Guest:I probably added a few new jokes, but I was just like, get up on stage again, get up on stage again.

00:59:54Guest:But now I feel better about what I'm doing up there.

00:59:57Guest:So I, you know, I want to get out there.

00:59:58Marc:Yeah.

00:59:59Guest:Show the people some stuff.

01:00:00Marc:Why doesn't Al take you?

01:00:02Guest:He does, but he, I mean, he's doing, as far as him headlining stuff, I think he does a lot of college stuff with Daily Show dudes.

01:00:08Marc:Oh, right, he's in that rotation.

01:00:09Guest:You can't just shove me.

01:00:11Guest:Three guys from The Daily Show and this guy.

01:00:13Marc:Well, you can go out with me.

01:00:14Marc:Goddamn, man.

01:00:15Marc:I've been taking Mike Lawrence out.

01:00:17Marc:Let's go, man.

01:00:18Marc:You ready to go?

01:00:19Guest:I'm fucking ready.

01:00:20Marc:Let's see if I can build.

01:00:21Marc:No Bill Burr yet.

01:00:23Marc:I don't think I'm ever going to be the guy.

01:00:24Marc:You're the guy in your own way.

01:00:27Guest:You built your own microcosm.

01:00:28Guest:You built your world.

01:00:29Guest:It's like what we talked about with Coop.

01:00:30Guest:You built a world.

01:00:31Guest:I love that shit.

01:00:32Guest:I love someone who builds a world.

01:00:34Marc:Yeah.

01:00:34Marc:Because you get to make the rules in your world.

01:00:36Marc:It's very funny the type of people when you do build a world, like the people that are my audience, I know that we share something because they know me very well.

01:00:45Guest:Yeah.

01:00:45Marc:And it's very weird to see that kind of reflection, to see you...

01:00:48Marc:in all of these people, because I know that my audiences are usually, they tip well, they're relatively smart people, there's not gonna be any drunk idiots in the room.

01:00:58Marc:Lovely people.

01:00:58Marc:Yeah, well, they've got their own issues, as I do, but you're sitting in a room full of your issues, in a way.

01:01:03Guest:I'm not a general comic.

01:01:05Guest:We're all trying to be a tuning fork, and so everyone has a different kind.

01:01:09Guest:They're like, oh, you hit something inside me, I'm gonna go see that guy on a regular basis.

01:01:13Guest:yeah we're gonna see what that you're talking about the thing they almost talked about the day before and didn't because they were a little they didn't want to get they didn't want to yell at the wife yeah but they're like oh he said yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah i'm concerned i'm gonna run out of me but uh me me is a is a renewable resource yeah with each day

01:01:34Guest:Dude, the thing is, life is such a shit-eating contest that there's always new things to think about.

01:01:39Guest:You're going to buy this land, and you're going to try to build this goddamn house because you love your girl.

01:01:43Marc:She's great.

01:01:44Marc:She didn't want that.

01:01:45Marc:She just wants a new house, and I just happen to have this weird Italian dude who keeps pestering me.

01:01:49Guest:Yeah, and she's great, and you love her, so you're going to do it.

01:01:52Guest:I'm going to buy her something.

01:01:52Guest:You think I wanted to buy a house in Los Feliz?

01:01:54Guest:I wanted to live in fucking Burbank or Pasadena.

01:01:56Guest:But I bought in Los Feliz because that's what she wanted.

01:01:58Guest:And Grant, she was right.

01:01:59Guest:But regardless, that's what I did because I wanted to make her happy.

01:02:01Guest:Yeah.

01:02:01Guest:Because we don't know what we're doing.

01:02:03Guest:And we're afraid of everything.

01:02:06Guest:You and I are very afraid of dying alone.

01:02:08Guest:And you found a nice girl and you don't want to lose her.

01:02:10Guest:God bless you.

01:02:11Marc:Oh, no.

01:02:12Marc:She wants a baby.

01:02:13Marc:What do you got there?

01:02:14Marc:Huh?

01:02:14Marc:Kevin Christie?

01:02:15Guest:By the way, I think you would be a fantastic dad.

01:02:19Guest:Sorry.

01:02:21Guest:Give her one, man.

01:02:24Guest:You don't think that'll give you a fantastic perspective on the world and life to look through it?

01:02:29Guest:You'll be able to look at life through the eyes of new eyeballs.

01:02:33Guest:You will see stuff for the first time through that person seeing stuff for the first time.

01:02:38Marc:I should just do it, right?

01:02:39Guest:Change your world.

01:02:40Guest:You're not going to do normal dad material?

01:02:43Guest:Are you kidding, man?

01:02:43Guest:No.

01:02:44Guest:Do it.

01:02:45Guest:All right.

01:02:46Guest:I would do it if I had to scratch and anyone who would let me put it in her.

01:02:49Marc:You could find someone.

01:02:50Marc:I don't want to find just anyone.

01:02:53Guest:How dare you?

01:02:53Guest:How dare you say that?

01:02:54Guest:How dare you?

01:02:56Guest:How dare you?

01:02:56Marc:I'll tell you what, if I bail out.

01:02:58Guest:Because it would.

01:02:59Guest:She's a great girl.

01:03:00Guest:She's real cute too.

01:03:01Guest:So knock it off.

01:03:02Guest:All right.

01:03:03Guest:Although I don't date anyone who's dated anyone I know.

01:03:05Guest:That's weird.

01:03:06Marc:You don't?

01:03:06Marc:No.

01:03:07Marc:Oh, my God.

01:03:08Marc:I have.

01:03:08Marc:That's weird.

01:03:09Marc:It just happens.

01:03:10Marc:It's a small world.

01:03:11Marc:I know.

01:03:12Guest:It's weird.

01:03:12Guest:No, it's not.

01:03:13Guest:Who am I following?

01:03:14Guest:It's a huge, yeah, who am I following?

01:03:16Guest:How is he?

01:03:16Guest:Was he a good opener or is he a better closer?

01:03:18Marc:Yeah, because I need to know that stuff.

01:03:20Guest:I mean, he's good, but he's real physical.

01:03:23Guest:You're more of a heady guy.

01:03:25Guest:Yeah, yeah, I mean, I'm more analytical.

01:03:26Guest:I don't act out what I'm doing as well.

01:03:29Marc:But that fear, I guess, I think that's the biggest problem with me is that like, okay, so I got some things going on now, but that could be it for this year, and that could be it for the rest of my life.

01:03:37Guest:You know, okay, I stopped thinking that.

01:03:39Guest:I used to think that way, especially trying to act as a living.

01:03:41Guest:I was like, is this my year of last job?

01:03:44Guest:Yeah.

01:03:45Guest:But that was 15 years ago.

01:03:47Guest:I've managed to fit into some sort of place where I can get just enough work to not go broke.

01:03:54Marc:I'm thinking about becoming a motivational speaker.

01:03:57Guest:Look, there are going to be colleges.

01:04:00Guest:You're going to be like some emeritus dude.

01:04:03Guest:Yeah, right.

01:04:04Guest:You may end up at the Brookings Institute.

01:04:06Guest:There's places to go, man.

01:04:07Guest:That wouldn't be a bad gig, would it?

01:04:09Guest:No, I think that's what I think about like certain comedians of like I think Chris Rock will be like Cornel West when he's older.

01:04:16Marc:I don't know if Cornel West actually organically comes out of Chris Rock.

01:04:20Marc:That wasn't a knock.

01:04:21Marc:No, no.

01:04:21Marc:I mean, I think that like because like I never saw myself as an entertainer.

01:04:26Marc:I don't know how you see yourself, but cat lady.

01:04:29Marc:You got cats, too?

01:04:33Guest:I now have a feral cat that lives in my front yard named Tracy.

01:04:36Guest:You can't touch it, though.

01:04:37Marc:No.

01:04:37Guest:I mean, she lets me get closer when I give her food.

01:04:40Guest:She stopped hissing.

01:04:41Guest:Now she only meows when I bring her the food.

01:04:43Guest:Well, that's nice.

01:04:44Guest:She's beautiful.

01:04:45Marc:but like like don't you ever think like um all right so like i'm almost 50 and things are going good yeah yeah we'll see what happens with this tv show maybe people like it maybe we won't the best you know when you're in this business and you know this the best i can hope to happen is they give me another shot at making some more yeah and we can make it better yeah okay i just got this book so this is gonna be a good year but then like what like i've never been a guy i guess not unlike you where it's like

01:05:11Marc:Well, I don't have a plan.

01:05:13Marc:Yeah.

01:05:13Marc:You know, this all seems to be the right things to be happening.

01:05:15Guest:But you're a process oriented guy and so am I. Yeah.

01:05:18Guest:So just continue.

01:05:20Guest:That's how I realized I like the process of doing the things more than the aftermath.

01:05:26Guest:I don't like I don't like I've always when people want to come up to you after a set.

01:05:29Guest:That's not what I want.

01:05:30Guest:I want just the laughs.

01:05:31Guest:I want the process of thinking of the jokes, telling them to people.

01:05:35Guest:I want the process of making art, the process of drawing something, the process of writing something.

01:05:41Guest:That's the best time.

01:05:42Guest:And if you read or listen to what artists talk about, they all come to the same conclusion.

01:05:48Guest:They realize that that's the best part, so that's what they do.

01:05:51Guest:And inadvertently, when you like the process, you accidentally make a ton of shit.

01:05:56Marc:Right, but for me, that process is like waiting until the last minute and then freaking out, and that's it.

01:06:02Guest:My car got booted.

01:06:03Guest:I mean, I'm obviously not ahead of the game, but you figure it out.

01:06:09Guest:That's the colors of the tile that is your tapestry or your mosaic, my friend.

01:06:15Marc:Yeah, yeah.

01:06:15Marc:I didn't make that mushroom.

01:06:17Marc:Some woman, that's her thing.

01:06:18Guest:That's fucking sweet looking.

01:06:19Guest:Isn't that great?

01:06:20Guest:That is great on several levels.

01:06:22Guest:She killed it.

01:06:22Guest:Yeah, she gave it to me.

01:06:24Guest:She got the cat.

01:06:25Guest:Yeah.

01:06:25Guest:She bought the cat at a store.

01:06:26Guest:Yeah.

01:06:26Guest:And then she decoupaged the balls off this mushroom.

01:06:30Marc:So when you think of like, have you ever done big canvases?

01:06:33Guest:Yeah.

01:06:34Guest:I'm about to get back into that, actually.

01:06:36Guest:Yeah?

01:06:36Guest:I was working on paper for a long, long time because I love paper.

01:06:39Guest:Yeah.

01:06:39Guest:Paper, I just love paper.

01:06:40Marc:Like with colors, watercolors?

01:06:44Guest:I use paint primarily in gouache, but I'm going to buy- A gouache?

01:06:46Guest:Gouache.

01:06:47Guest:It's an opaque watercolor.

01:06:48Guest:It's what the designers used to use in the 40s and 50s to do graphic design.

01:06:52Guest:It dries really flat.

01:06:53Guest:I like that.

01:06:54Guest:You can work fast.

01:06:56Guest:But now I'm going to- I've been working, starting to get back in big things on canvas.

01:06:59Marc:Do you do your own gessoing?

01:07:01Marc:Yeah.

01:07:01Marc:You do?

01:07:02Marc:Do you stretch your own canvas?

01:07:03Guest:No, I will suck at it.

01:07:06Guest:When I did that in college, when I was in art school, the stuff I was terrible at was like the last step, cutting the mat.

01:07:13Guest:I cut more things in half on accident.

01:07:15Guest:I was the worst.

01:07:17Guest:I had a wood shop class where you had to make a drawer.

01:07:18Guest:I drilled all the way through it.

01:07:20Guest:It was awful.

01:07:21Marc:So you can do some big canvases.

01:07:23Marc:Yeah, man.

01:07:24Marc:Like abstracts or figurative?

01:07:25Marc:What do you think?

01:07:26Guest:Both.

01:07:27Guest:I love abstraction.

01:07:28Guest:I love making abstract paintings.

01:07:30Guest:I love figurative stuff.

01:07:31Guest:Who are your painters?

01:07:32Guest:Modern or dead.

01:07:34Guest:Well, I mean, either one.

01:07:35Guest:I love a dude named Taylor McKimmons.

01:07:38Guest:Mine's great.

01:07:39Guest:I love Clayton Brothers.

01:07:40Guest:I love Ed Templeton.

01:07:42Guest:There's an abstract dude named Joe Bradley, who I think is brilliant.

01:07:45Guest:He's alive?

01:07:45Guest:Yep.

01:07:46Guest:All these people are alive.

01:07:47Guest:Ours is named Ashley Maycumber.

01:07:49Guest:Great.

01:07:49Guest:Yeah?

01:07:49Guest:There's a lot of- Who are your old guys?

01:07:51Marc:Are you a Rothko guy?

01:07:53Marc:You like Rothko?

01:07:54Guest:I do like Rothko.

01:07:55Guest:Love Rothko.

01:07:55Guest:I mean, that guy, yeah.

01:07:57Guest:Rothko was aiming at some transcendent shit.

01:08:00Guest:Deep shit, man.

01:08:00Guest:You stand in front of those and you get it.

01:08:02Guest:Right.

01:08:02Guest:But you see, there's a thing that happens.

01:08:05Guest:You see these other guys painting and you can feel their self-consciousness.

01:08:08Guest:I always say, even my whole life, there's been my invisible dad in my head while I draw.

01:08:14Guest:What your father would think, that's well-drawn.

01:08:16Marc:Yeah.

01:08:16Guest:Like, oh, look, that looks like a genuine lion.

01:08:19Guest:Like, that horse is well made.

01:08:20Guest:Like, it's just that really conservative.

01:08:22Guest:Yeah.

01:08:23Guest:And the greats are just like, they let that go.

01:08:25Guest:Yeah.

01:08:26Guest:Like, this guy, Joe Bradley, I mean, people would look at his paintings like, oh, he's throwing a bunch of shit around.

01:08:30Guest:It's a mess.

01:08:30Guest:And it's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

01:08:32Marc:Well, that's the difference when you stand in front of a piece of art when you know, like, this is finished.

01:08:36Guest:There's a million Rothko.

01:08:37Guest:Well, yeah.

01:08:38Guest:That's why people ask, because I don't make, the art I make is not necessarily, like, super, it's not, like, super modern, but how do you know when you're done?

01:08:46Guest:Because it's, like, a little strange, and I'm like, I stopped thinking about it.

01:08:49Marc:Right.

01:08:49Guest:It's like, it's done.

01:08:50Marc:There's a balance to it.

01:08:52Guest:Yeah, I stopped worrying about it or thinking about it or wondering about it.

01:08:54Guest:But, like, you know, you stand in front of an actual Rothko versus someone who ripped him off, and you feel the difference.

01:09:00Guest:Yeah.

01:09:00Guest:There's a difference.

01:09:01Marc:That's a good question you asked when you said about guitar.

01:09:04Marc:I mean, can you do what you want to do with it?

01:09:06Marc:So you asked me that.

01:09:08Guest:Yeah.

01:09:08Marc:And I can for the most part.

01:09:10Marc:Yeah.

01:09:10Marc:And I think that's the difference with any artist of any kind is that when a guy has got his chops together.

01:09:16Marc:Yeah.

01:09:16Marc:And he does something, he's made a choice.

01:09:19Marc:It's not like he's not mimicking anything.

01:09:21Marc:Yeah.

01:09:22Marc:This is done and I know what I'm doing.

01:09:24Guest:There's a book, Robert Henri, Art Spirit.

01:09:27Guest:The Economy of Means Leads to Dexterity of Will.

01:09:31Right.

01:09:33Marc:Huh.

01:09:34Guest:When you have your process down, you can do whatever the hell you want.

01:09:38Marc:Right.

01:09:38Marc:You know what you're doing.

01:09:39Guest:Yeah.

01:09:40Guest:It's when comics get to that point where they stop being afraid of bombing or they're just, you know, they're mellow up there.

01:09:45Guest:Then you see people coming up with stuff on stage and it's just happening.

01:09:48Guest:Right.

01:09:48Guest:Because they're not, they're past all the early hurdles.

01:09:52Marc:Right.

01:09:52Guest:I mean, for the first year, I was afraid to take the mic off the stand because I saw David Taylor hit himself in the teeth with it.

01:09:57Guest:And I was like, please, it made a really weird noise.

01:10:00Guest:And I was like, I may hit myself in the teeth.

01:10:02Right.

01:10:02Guest:Leave it in there.

01:10:03Guest:Yeah, leave it in there.

01:10:04Guest:Let's not fuck with anything.

01:10:05Guest:For a calendar year.

01:10:09Marc:Yeah, you get loose.

01:10:10Marc:But then sometimes you get loose and you lose your discipline.

01:10:13Marc:There's still a discipline.

01:10:14Guest:That's the thing I realize about trying to be creative.

01:10:17Guest:It never changes necessarily.

01:10:19Guest:You just get older.

01:10:20Guest:But if you're after it and you care about the process, it's always good.

01:10:26Guest:It's always fun if you just focus on the right elements of it, which is hard.

01:10:31Guest:It's not easy to do that.

01:10:32Guest:Life gets in the way a lot.

01:10:34Guest:But you just try to give yourself a time each day to think and try to do what you're trying to do.

01:10:40Marc:I gotta do that right now.

01:10:42Guest:John Hughes was between 4 and 6 a.m.

01:10:45Marc:Really?

01:10:46Guest:So he got up at that?

01:10:47Guest:Yeah, because he asked me when I work.

01:10:48Guest:I was like, I work like 12 to 4.

01:10:49Guest:He's like, I like 4 to 6.

01:10:50Guest:He's like, it's quiet.

01:10:52Marc:So he's up and he's writing.

01:10:53Guest:Yeah.

01:10:54Guest:I mean, that dude never, that dude wrote mountains of stuff.

01:10:57Marc:Is there still screenplays around that need to be made?

01:11:00Guest:Yeah, they won't be, but there's tons of them.

01:11:02Marc:Really?

01:11:03Marc:Why won't they be?

01:11:03Guest:Because their family's not interested in having someone else do it.

01:11:07Guest:They'll mess it up.

01:11:08Guest:They'll screw it up for sure.

01:11:09Guest:Someone's rewriting one of his scripts right now.

01:11:11Guest:Why?

01:11:12Guest:Why do you see need to be rewritten?

01:11:15Guest:Look at his track record and tell, okay, add in a couple cell phones.

01:11:18Guest:Other than that, leave it the fuck alone.

01:11:21Guest:Or don't make it.

01:11:22Guest:How come they have it?

01:11:23Guest:He sold it right before he passed away.

01:11:26Marc:Well, it was good talking to you, man.

01:11:29Marc:You too, dude.

01:11:30Marc:So what are you going to do today?

01:11:33Guest:I got to go home and finish.

01:11:34Guest:I got to make graphics for the top of the board because that's where the joke is going to go.

01:11:39Marc:Oh, on the skateboard.

01:11:40Guest:Joke's on top, graphic on bottom.

01:11:41Guest:So I got to draw.

01:11:42Guest:I'm going to draw one of the skate.

01:11:44Guest:The skate company has this character.

01:11:45Guest:I'm going to draw him holding the mic sweating.

01:11:48Guest:And you're going to see the little joke next to it.

01:11:50Marc:All right, Kevin.

01:11:51Marc:Thanks, man.

01:11:51Guest:Thank you.

01:11:53Thank you.

01:11:53Bye.

01:11:57Bye.

01:11:57Marc:That's it.

01:11:58Marc:That's our show.

01:11:58Marc:I hope you enjoyed that, Kevin, with a great story.

01:12:01Marc:Talented guy, man.

01:12:02Marc:Go check out his comedy.

01:12:04Marc:Go check out his artwork.

01:12:05Marc:He said he's going to give me some artwork.

01:12:07Marc:I like artwork.

01:12:09Marc:Thank you for all your emails.

01:12:10Marc:Thank you for all your letters.

01:12:11Marc:Thank you for all the gifts you send, the vinyl, the books, the tchotchkes, everything.

01:12:14Marc:I love it.

01:12:15Marc:I haven't been talking about it a lot because I have been busy, but I do have it in the garage, and as I cleaned my garage, I found a lot of it, and a lot of it's here.

01:12:22Marc:I'm thinking about doing a big art show of just stuff that you guys have sent.

01:12:26Marc:I don't know where I would do that or who would want that, but I would.

01:12:30Marc:I would like to see it all in one place, and you guys deserve it.

01:12:32Marc:Very creative people, and I'm glad I inspire that type of creativity in people.

01:12:36Marc:Any kind.

01:12:37Marc:Painting, writing, ceramics.

01:12:41Marc:I mean, it's unbelievable.

01:12:42Marc:Creative people, it's just, the output is amazing, and I love it.

01:12:46Marc:I love the stuff.

01:12:48Marc:Look, if you need anything WTF Pod related, go to WTFPod.com.

01:12:52Marc:The link to the EFF will be there for you to educate yourself about the patent troll that threatens podcasting, that threatens the future of podcasting, that threatens free podcasting.

01:13:02Marc:What else do I got to say?

01:13:03Marc:What else do I have to say?

01:13:05Marc:Probably big news on Thursday.

01:13:08Marc:So that's something to look forward to.

01:13:09Marc:And also, who's on the show Thursday?

01:13:12Marc:Oh, Tommy Stinson from The Replacements.

01:13:15Marc:So that's it.

01:13:15Marc:I'm not going to ramble on too long.

01:13:17Marc:Boomer lives!

01:13:24Boomer lives!