Episode 167 - Bobcat Goldthwait
Guest:Are we doing this?
Guest:Really?
Guest:Wait for it.
Guest:Are we doing this?
Guest:Wait for it.
Guest:Pow!
Guest:What the fuck?
Guest:And it's also, eh, what the fuck?
Guest:What's wrong with me?
Guest:It's time for WTF?
Guest:What the fuck?
Guest:With Mark Maron.
Marc:Okay, let's do this.
Marc:How are you, what the fuckers?
Marc:What the fuck, buddies?
Marc:What the fuck, Knicks?
Marc:What the fuck, nuts?
Marc:What the fuck, Australians?
Marc:That was a long one, but it was an appropriate one.
Marc:I am in Melbourne, Australia.
Marc:But before I get into that, on the show today, Bobcat Goldthwait sat down with me in the garage for a nice, long conversation about his life.
Marc:I mean, he's been a little, been a bit under the radar lately, but it was great talking to him.
Marc:And again, I am in Melbourne.
Marc:Did I mention that already?
Marc:And I have to be honest with you.
Marc:I really am having a nice time.
Marc:And once I got past my preemptive withdrawal from my techno-narcissistic extensions and my global emotional reassurance grid on the plane with no Wi-Fi, thinking I would be stranded here in Australia, I am actually having...
Marc:Again, it's a great city, and I was sent home from this country, from this city, in 1992.
Marc:I am getting closure.
Marc:I am having a good time.
Marc:I am at the – what is it?
Marc:The Melbourne International Comedy Festival –
Marc:And I didn't know how it was going to go.
Marc:I have an aversion, as you know, to traveling abroad.
Marc:It's getting better as I do it more.
Marc:I find that I'm more comfortable.
Marc:I'm less freaked out.
Marc:I mean, this plane ride must have been, I think it was, it was like a, how long was it?
Marc:Like 15 hours, 20 hours, maybe 90 hours on an airplane and you fly into the future.
Marc:However I'm recording, the day hasn't happened for you.
Marc:At this moment in time when I'm recording this, America has not experienced the 17 hours that I've already experienced.
Marc:I'm in the future right now and the future feels fine.
Marc:There's no problems.
Marc:I can't tell you who's going to win any games, but I do know it's a little different.
Marc:It's a little difficult to call back in time to people in America because they just they don't understand the future like I do.
Marc:I'm finding that one of the keys to traveling and one of the keys to being in another country, and this is just me, is to try to surround yourself with as many things as you understand as possible.
Marc:Like what happens to me is I'll get into a habit.
Marc:I'll find a coffee shop.
Marc:And then you develop a relationship with the coffee shop.
Marc:I know where the supermarket is.
Marc:So now I develop a relationship with that.
Marc:And now I'm online.
Marc:So now that was the big fear.
Marc:Man, did I go through a panic for a little while.
Marc:I was on the airplane from Los Angeles to Australia.
Marc:No, no Wi-Fi.
Marc:So I was literally without any connection to the world.
Marc:I was flying over the ocean through time and space into the future with no connection.
Marc:to what we know is the future, which is the high tech world of Twitter and emailing.
Marc:And I got to tell you, it was a little existentially lonely.
Marc:It was a little difficult.
Marc:When I landed in Australia, I was freaking out.
Marc:I had to get my phone set up so I could make phone calls in Australia.
Marc:So now if I have to, I can call the states and it only cost me $90 for the first 30 seconds.
Marc:And $112 for every minute after that.
Marc:I can text for, I think, $60 a text going out and $49 for text coming in.
Marc:So I'm all set.
Marc:God forbid I need to call somebody because I need help.
Marc:It might bankrupt me.
Marc:That's the position I'm in.
Marc:If I use my phone, I could go broke.
Marc:But in all honesty, Melbourne is a beautiful city.
Marc:It happens to be sunny right now.
Marc:We're experiencing a sunny 15 minute spell, a 15 minute sunny spell.
Marc:I've learned that being in Australia, in Melbourne specifically, that if it's sunny, you know, don't count on it because in about 10 minutes it could start hailing.
Marc:That's happened a few times.
Marc:The comics have been great.
Marc:I could live here.
Marc:I swear to God, I could live here.
Marc:I've developed a taste for Vegemite.
Marc:I didn't think I would, but I went out to the supermarket.
Marc:I've got all the things that I like to eat compulsively.
Marc:That makes me comfortable.
Marc:I think that's the key to international travel, finding and figuring out a way to order coffee in the culture that you are in.
Marc:If it's complicated, it's a little complicated here.
Marc:What we know as an Americano is a long black.
Marc:What we know as a cappuccino is a cappuccino.
Marc:What we know as a double shot is just saying strong.
Marc:So once you figure out that, you crack the coffee code, you're good.
Marc:You're in.
Marc:The rest is gravy.
Marc:Surround yourself with compulsive food to eat for when you get home late at night and you want to reward yourself in an inappropriate way.
Marc:How about Tim Tams?
Marc:That's an issue.
Marc:Never thought I'd have that issue, the Vegemite Tim Tams issue.
Marc:My first show here, someone threw a box of Tim Tams up here.
Marc:There are these biscuits, as they call cookies here, that are chocolate cookies with the stuff on the inside.
Marc:And if you open the package, it's a national law that you have to plow through the entire package.
Marc:So I had a sort of Tim Tam apocalypse while I was here.
Marc:But nonetheless, all that aside, I'm having a lovely time.
Marc:I'm reconnecting with friends.
Marc:There's some Americans here.
Marc:I saw Maria Bamford in the elevator and just between us.
Marc:She was with her parents.
Marc:I just met Maria Bamford's parents.
Marc:I saw the source, the well of where it came from.
Marc:And you know what?
Marc:Very pleasant people.
Marc:They were very pleasant people.
Marc:We had a lovely elevator ride.
Marc:The elevator doors didn't close at first, so I was stuck in an elevator with Maria Bamford and her parents.
Marc:And it was interesting because none of us knew what was going to happen, how long we were going to stand there.
Marc:And what could happen?
Marc:And Maria said, what if we're stuck up here for two days?
Marc:That'd be okay.
Marc:And I said, I'm not sure that would be okay.
Marc:But we get some material.
Marc:Am I right?
Marc:Yes, I think I am.
Marc:She was great.
Marc:I went and watched her.
Marc:I went and watched Simon Munnery.
Marc:I ran into my friend Greg Fleet, who is doing a show here.
Marc:I'm doing his show tonight.
Marc:I'm hoping to see Daniel Kitson, Felicity Ward.
Marc:There's a lot of people.
Marc:The thing about festivals, and one of the reasons why I think I always had a problem with them, is that
Marc:They are not the Marc Maron Festival.
Marc:And that's difficult for me to accept.
Marc:I mean, these festivals, there's literally, there's gotta be a couple of hundred acts.
Marc:And there's a big chalkboard where they write all the acts that are gonna be performing on any given day in exactly the same size lettering for every act.
Marc:And when you see 200 shows on a blackboard and yours is just there with the rest of them, you think, I'm meaningless.
Marc:I'm just another name on a blackboard of the great slate of comedy.
Marc:But I got past that.
Marc:It doesn't all have to be about me.
Marc:Yes, you heard me say that.
Marc:And you can quote me on that.
Marc:It doesn't have to be about me.
Marc:I'm having a great time.
Marc:Are you guys going to be able to accept that I'm having a good time?
Marc:I just ate Vegemite on rice crackers.
Marc:I did that.
Marc:That's where I'm at.
Marc:That's what's happening here.
Marc:What else do I want to tell you?
Marc:Oh, I do want to tell you this.
Marc:A lot of you people are coming to the podcast at new.
Marc:You're new to the podcast, and there's some episodes that you'd like to have but maybe can't get at.
Marc:Either you don't have an app or you don't want to sign up for the premium on the site.
Marc:But now at WTFPodShop.com.
Marc:We have made available the Louis C.K.
Marc:episodes, parts one and two.
Marc:Judd Apatow, parts one and two.
Marc:Ben Stiller you can purchase there.
Marc:Dave Attell is up there.
Marc:Dane Cook is up there.
Marc:Andy Richter is up there.
Marc:And, of course, Robin Williams, Carlos Mencia, parts one or two.
Marc:And then the four or five episodes we did at Live, the Live at Comics series, are all available at WTFPodShop.com.
Marc:I also wanted to tell you that I'm getting closure on that horrendous event that happened to me in 1992 when I was sent home from Australia.
Marc:I've returned to Melbourne.
Marc:It's been a great run so far.
Marc:There's only been four shows.
Marc:No problems.
Marc:A lot of what the fuckers coming up.
Marc:A lot of people hanging out.
Marc:Some dude took me out to dinner.
Marc:I trusted a fan to take me out to dinner.
Marc:It was a little touchy at first.
Marc:I was there after a show.
Marc:No one else was around.
Marc:Everyone had gone away.
Marc:And this guy said, do you want to get something to eat?
Marc:And I had that moment where I'm like, I do want to get something to eat.
Marc:But he's a nice guy.
Marc:You know why?
Marc:Because what the fuckers, what the fuck fans are great people.
Marc:And I believe that to be true.
Marc:Because if you like me, then I like you.
Marc:That didn't come out right.
Marc:How you doing, Bobby?
Marc:I'm doing okie doke.
Marc:There was that moment, that moment where, you know, you did so, we got such great feedback on the live one.
Marc:People were like, holy shit, where the hell has he been?
Marc:He's never been funnier.
Guest:What's he been doing?
Guest:Oh, well, pshaw.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:For reals.
Guest:Well, thanks.
Guest:That's nice.
Marc:I mean, are you finding that now that you go out and you're like, where the fuck has he been?
Marc:And God damn it, he's so funny.
Guest:No, I go out and I do stand up and it's very weird.
Guest:I go out and I always get introduced as a comedy legend, which is like, I feel like Babe the Blue Ox should be with me.
Marc:Yeah, I always feel like when they say legend, you should say, I'm not dead.
Guest:yeah yeah i mean there's there's something about it's veterans another one yeah it's the worst like comedy veterans comedy veteran uh yeah the uh the now the comedy stylings of uh veteran bob scratch goldfarm yeah i'm gonna be a wily-o-coot talking about uh what it was like uh when charlie was all around no i uh thanks for having me on yeah now i'm catching up with your show now i've always avoided your show why
Guest:Um, you know why?
Guest:Because I was under the impression, falsely, that it was dissecting comedy.
Guest:And that, I really don't like it when people take comedy serious.
Guest:Do you know what I mean?
Marc:Yeah, no, I never set out to do that.
Guest:But, like, you know what I mean?
Guest:Like, I get asked to be in movies where they talk about comedy, or books where they talk about comedy.
Marc:Oh, documentaries?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I really, I don't have any interest.
Guest:I loathe it.
Marc:It's, um... Like when people say, like, when do you choose to raise the pitch of the thunny voice?
Marc:Oh,
Guest:When did you first realize that you were biting Grover's style, which really did happen to me when I was directing The Kimmel Show?
Guest:Grover was on the show.
Guest:The puppet, not Washington.
Guest:Grover, so he's just laying on the floor when I show up for work.
Guest:and he's like all akimbo and he looked like a suicide.
Guest:He looked like a Ouija photo, a crime photo.
Guest:And I go to the puppeteer, I go, yo, that's really fucking up my shit big time.
Guest:Can you put that puppet on?
Guest:And Grover goes, hi, Bobcat.
Guest:And I really became a kid, I go, oh,
Guest:uh hi Grover I did that and everyone thought I was lying but I go hi Grover and then the other thing was I was like oh this is clearly where I got my act like as a kid I was probably watching Grover going I like his chops that guy's got good he's got good style but you don't remember being conscious of that
Guest:No, but I do remember as a kid, I used to do different voices and characters a little bit.
Guest:I don't know what the character was, but I was like, my mother got really mad once in a store, whatever the character I was doing that day.
Guest:Apparently, someone thought I was challenged, and this woman comes up to my mother.
Guest:She goes, you must have so much patience.
Guest:My mother's going, these people think you're special.
Guest:Knock it off.
Guest:My mother's really upset.
Marc:So obviously, Bobcat Goldthwait is in my garage right now.
Guest:Yeah, I've never been.
Guest:This is really nice.
Marc:And we had that moment out on the deck where you looked wistfully out.
Guest:And it reminded me of a deck I once owned.
Guest:I'm on the road a lot.
Guest:And it's hard promoting it because you're going, you know, there's a connection I make with a live audience that I don't get when I'm directing.
Guest:And I ran out of money, ladies and gentlemen.
Guest:This is the alimony tour.
Guest:When you see me on the road, we're all paying for a pool that none of us swimming.
Guest:That sounded dirty.
Guest:I'm not implying my ex-wife's vagina is the size of a pool.
Marc:Yeah, but if the shoe fits, am I right?
Guest:If the vagina fits, right?
Marc:If the arm fits.
Marc:No, but... Oh, really?
Marc:So there is some of that as part of your incentive?
Marc:Because that's not an unusual story?
Guest:No, no.
Guest:I was listening to... Dave Foley?
Guest:Dave Foley, yeah.
Guest:Oh, that was heartbreaking.
Guest:Yeah, it cheered me up.
Marc:Oh, good.
Guest:At least I'm not that bad off.
Guest:Yeah, I was like, three grand a month?
Guest:That's peanuts, you know.
Marc:But when I first met you, it was in Boston, and I don't know if I really met you because we talked about this a little bit on the live one, that you were sort of peaking there, and I watched you do your garage.
Guest:Yeah, I was in Boston, and I was leaving, so I had a garage sale you had mentioned.
Marc:Yeah, on the stage of Stitches.
Guest:And it really was all my crap from my house, and then I just sold it.
Guest:But when I first started in stand-up in Boston, I would do stuff like, you know, I didn't do traditional stand-up because by the time I was 17, 18, I was over stand-up.
Marc:But that's interesting because, you know, not many people start at that age.
Marc:Even now, there are people that start young.
Marc:But there's a couple of guys that I know, Louis C.K.
Marc:'s one, and I didn't realize that you and Dana Gould as well.
Marc:I mean, he literally started as teenagers.
Marc:So where were you?
Guest:Like 15.
Guest:Tom Kenny and myself, we were doing dates with Barry Crimmins at 15 years old up in, well, Skinny Atlas, but in Syracuse, New York.
Marc:And you were in high school?
Guest:We were in high school.
Guest:People were worried about prom dates, and I was trying to get my Letterman 10 together.
Guest:Were you really?
Guest:Well, not Letterman, but we were working on our acts.
Marc:So were you doing a team thing with Tom?
Guest:No, no.
Guest:It wasn't ever like, hey, I'm Bobcat and I'm Tomcat.
Guest:And you just made the cat connection.
Guest:No, it was, you know, the real genesis of the name I never really talk about because it's a little long.
Guest:I'll try to do it fast.
Guest:But Barry Kramins.
Guest:We have time.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Barry Kramins, super genius.
Guest:The great political satirist.
Guest:So Barry's always been kind of a mentor of mine, and I met him when I was 15.
Guest:But Barry comes in one day when we're doing the show, and he's like, you know, I want to be called Bearcat.
Guest:That's what my friends call me, Bearcat.
Guest:And Tom Kenny and myself being sarcastic pricks are like, oh, that's funny, because I'm Tomcat, and I'm Bobcat.
Guest:And he's like, really?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:So they started introducing us, right?
Guest:And now 30 years later, they're Tom and Barry and I'm Bobcat.
Guest:So the joke backfired.
Guest:But the funny thing was, just about a year ago, he found that out.
Guest:He was really pissed.
Marc:That you were just busting his balls?
Guest:Yeah, he's like, you motherfucker, you snide little pricks.
Guest:You had to get dropped off at the comedy show.
Guest:Couldn't even drink.
Guest:Couldn't even... Fuck.
Guest:You know, he just went... And you were making fun of me.
Guest:I even defended that.
Marc:That's funny.
Marc:That he'd still be pissed off about it.
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Marc:Or newly pissed off about it.
Guest:Yeah, he was... He should have been.
Marc:Well, he's a cranky bastard sometimes.
Guest:Um...
Guest:I think now he's kind of more lighter than you.
Guest:No, definitely.
Guest:My favorite Barry joke is people say, Barry, if you don't like living in America, why don't you leave it?
Guest:Because I don't want to be a victim of its foreign policies.
Marc:I remember when he used to do jokes about, what was it, true cigarettes?
Marc:They have a diagram of the filter, and that's the valve they're going to put in your heart.
Marc:Yeah, and I remember him hosting that regular show.
Marc:I think it was like Wednesday nights at Stitches.
Marc:I think it was after you had gone, but out of all the people to be supportive at the beginning, I mean, he was kind of a hard-to-please kind of guy, and he definitely had standards about stand-up.
Marc:Now, when you were doing it at 15, had you evolved the character, or were you just doing straight stand-up?
Guest:No, I would do really...
Guest:embarrassing stand-up I wish I had I mean everyone starts somewhere I know but I mean like you know and clearly like you could see who I was influenced by but who was it well it was like probably me trying to do Steve Martin and Andy Kaufman and a little David Brenner no you do something really weird and go am I right people
Guest:I used to convention a lot.
Guest:So I went on a, I would go on stage and I would do these things more than standup.
Guest:Like I would go, this is the part of the show where I like to gut and clean a fish.
Guest:You know, I'd come somewhat out of character.
Guest:And then my roommate would have a fish.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:This is like a herring or whatever we'd die.
Guest:And then one night at the ding-ho, the herring had rotted and
Guest:And so I start gutting this fish on stage and it's putrid and there's fish guts and this woman vomits.
Guest:So I put the mic down.
Guest:She vomited?
Guest:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Guest:So I put the mic down so you could hear her vomiting over it.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And then I go, and then I'm like, thank you.
Guest:Good night.
Guest:And there's fish guts.
Guest:And the next guy.
Guest:It stunk the whole place up.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:But then the next comic, you know, had to come on and go, hey, you know, relationships are weird, you know.
Marc:As they're cleaning up puke and there's a stink of fish.
Marc:So you were under 20 when you came to Boston?
Guest:Yeah, I used my brother's ID to do comedy when I really first started, which was helpful if I bombed.
Guest:Boy, that Jim Goldthwait's not funny.
Marc:I talked my brother out of the business.
Marc:I hear his brother Bob's hilarious, but he just doesn't do it around here.
Marc:So, I mean, were your parents into it?
Marc:I mean, what kind of family you come from?
Guest:Well, my old man was kind of a performance artist, but on a suburban level.
Guest:And all of his pieces were fueled by Budweiser or Jenny Cream Ale.
Guest:Jenny Cream!
Guest:Jenny Cream!
Guest:Or Christ there, you get the cream ale there.
Guest:You know, Bob.
Guest:Geez, Stephen Myzork was in a snowmobile accident there, Christ.
Guest:So he would...
Guest:He would do things like, I'll give you his greatest hits.
Guest:He'd be kind of bombed, and then he'd put on a special costume.
Guest:They always would change.
Guest:And climb to the top of the refrigerator, and he'd have an open jar of mayonnaise.
Guest:And he would convince the neighborhood that he was going to jump into the jar of mayonnaise.
Guest:Like the neighborhood would come to your house?
Guest:Yeah, he'd have the doors open.
Guest:Come on, really?
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:And then there was always some sort of... What kind of outfit?
Guest:And then he would be... Oh, he was always like...
Guest:He had a pair of waders You know those rubber But he cut off the legs So they just like Rubber leader hoses Usually a crash helmet Maybe a towel Sure as a cape And he would do one I remember when he tried to Jump the above ground swimming pool With a ramp that he built On a bike?
Guest:Yeah on a dirt bike And he kept going up and down the ramp Like Evel Knievel would do it And everybody was out of their minds Because it really looked like he was going to do it And what he was doing was running out the gas Uh huh
Guest:So he would do these really long and involved setups and never tell people, oh, it's a joke.
Guest:I'm not really crazy.
Guest:So I mean, obviously that influenced me.
Marc:And how old were you when this was going on?
Guest:I was little.
Guest:And when I was really little, it was terrifying because you don't know that your dad's goofing around, that he's not really going to jump out of the white birch tree.
Guest:Did he wear goggles and stuff?
Guest:He would have different costumes.
Guest:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marc:And who was he doing this for, exactly?
Guest:It would be, like, you know, the neighborhood.
Guest:Like, we were all friends, so the kids from all the neighbors.
Marc:So he wanted to entertain the kids.
Guest:Yeah, and there was also, like, keg parties would break out often, like, at my home.
Guest:My oldest brother, Tommy, was a biker, so we used to have bikers.
Guest:Big Harleys always all over the front yard.
Marc:Real bikers?
Guest:Yeah, real bikers.
Marc:Evil bikers or...
Guest:Well, I didn't realize bikers, you didn't fuck with them because I grew up with them.
Guest:Do you know what I mean?
Guest:Until later, I realized, oh, no, they're like bears at the dump.
Guest:They look cool, but just stay in your car and don't fucking get out of the car.
Marc:Keep the women in the car.
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:It's because I grew up with guys.
Guest:Lowlife was one of the friends.
Marc:I remember my mother- So you had bikers, so there were women showing their boobs and stuff around the house?
Marc:I mean, I always picture Biker magazine-
Marc:What was that biker magazine called?
Marc:Easy Rider.
Marc:Easy Rider, yeah.
Guest:So, no, it was more like there would be like a guy would come over, like, yeah, this is one guy, Low Life, and he has a shirt that says, Harley's the best, fuck the rest.
Guest:And my mother's going, you're not wearing that shirt in this house, Low Life.
Guest:And my mother never knew all their names.
Guest:That was his name, the established name?
Guest:But she was also, because my brother Tommy was a genius at giving the nuns nicknames.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And my mother accidentally slipped and called one nun Sister Bucky.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Listen, Sister Bucky, because my brother Tommy, no one knew their real names.
Guest:So my brother Tommy, yeah, they would have these, I remember so many stories.
Guest:So I grew up with my brother who was a biker.
Guest:And just two of you?
Guest:No, no, and I have another brother who's an AD, an assistant director, which is really perfect because- He was as a child?
Guest:Well, yeah, because we work now as a team.
Guest:He was the guy like, if everybody could just calm down, we could bring out the birthday cake in five.
Guest:And I mean it, a real five, all right?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:We're going to go around for inserts of the kids opening the presents again.
Guest:We didn't get it.
Guest:So we worked together.
Guest:It's really fun.
Guest:Now you do.
Guest:Yeah, as I'm directing you.
Marc:And Tommy's still a biker.
Guest:Oh, no.
Guest:Tommy passed away.
Guest:Oh, sorry.
Guest:His trailer burnt up.
Guest:So, yeah.
Guest:It's really... It was horrible.
Guest:And it's also really strange.
Guest:What happened?
Guest:What happened?
Guest:I don't know.
Guest:He lived in a trailer?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:I mean, he was really involved in drugs and stuff.
Guest:And, you know, and he was definitely, as a kid, he was like my hero.
Guest:And then these drugs just took over, you know.
Guest:And it was sad.
Guest:I mean, he was a very colorful guy.
Guest:He was a very colorful guy even when he used.
Guest:He had tons of friends and stuff.
Marc:Isn't that funny, though, when you have an older brother...
Marc:that they define your life somehow.
Marc:Like, you know, your music choices.
Guest:Oh, my goodness.
Guest:Yeah, my brother used to come to dinner and would stab a salt potato and use it as a microphone and get the whole family singing songs.
Guest:Or on the school bus, he'd get the whole bus singing the banana splits theme.
Guest:Yeah, man.
Guest:He was really charismatic.
Marc:Did he have records and stuff?
Guest:Oh, sure, sure.
Guest:And he would take me to concerts.
Guest:Oh, really?
Guest:Yeah, his friend Big Mitch, who was a former Green Beret.
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:was on acid and was driving us to the Allman Brothers concert and suddenly was having flashbacks.
Guest:From beyond?
Guest:Yeah, yeah, and I don't know if it's comedy or for real.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Yeah, so he was trying to kill Charlie and stuff.
Guest:Freaking out?
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:So, yeah, that was my upbringing.
Guest:But my brother passed away, and I'll tell this story, and I'm trying to do it politely, but...
Guest:One of his pallbearers was a little person.
Guest:So no one gives me the heads up that he's a pallbearer.
Guest:So I look down at the end of the church, and there's Ricky.
Guest:And I said to my daughter, I go, it looks like Ricky's riding a subway.
Guest:Because my daughter starts losing it.
Guest:And she's like, I think you just got air.
Guest:And so the priest is up, and the priest is talking about, oh, Tom loved the nature.
Guest:He loved the wilderness.
Guest:He loved this.
Guest:And I went on after the priest, and I was like, Father, I don't want to be rude, but...
Guest:uh tommy didn't love animals because he said oh he loved animals he liked to kill animals did he yeah yeah he had this home at one point and i drove out with tony v to see if uh i'd given him some money to put new windows yeah so i wanted to make sure he bought the windows and then smoke them you know so so i go out you know where the money went so i went and and looked at the windows and
Guest:Tony didn't know my brother, and there's crazy corn growing up psychotically all around the whole house.
Guest:There's no rose.
Guest:Psycho corn.
Guest:He goes, what's that about, Tony?
Guest:He goes, what's that about?
Guest:My brother goes, oh, it's the deer.
Guest:He's like, oh, you help feed him?
Guest:He goes, feed him?
Guest:I'm going to blast him.
Guest:So I go upstairs, and one of the bathroom windows is broken.
Guest:I go, Tommy, what happened to this window?
Guest:He goes, yeah, I had a little problem with recoil, Bobby.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:So my brother was sitting on the toilet shooting deer.
Guest:He was like, hey, want to go hunting?
Guest:Yeah, meet me in the kitchen.
Marc:And he'd eat them and he'd gut them and everything?
Guest:Oh, sure, sure.
Guest:And the game warden was always coming by.
Guest:Oh, really?
Marc:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marc:So he'd bait them with the corn and shoot them off the toilet.
Marc:Sure, why not?
Guest:Oh, now we're leaving, Tony.
Guest:He goes, he's like going, you got to get me out of here.
Guest:Your brother's certifiable.
What?
We're leaving.
Guest:And Tony's going, what is that?
Guest:Is that like a woodchuck?
Guest:What is that across the street?
Guest:And my brother goes, yep.
Guest:And before we make it down the end of the driveway, kablam!
Guest:And Tony's like, I fingered that woodchuck.
Guest:I fingered the woodchuck.
Guest:I remember once I was doing a show and two of his fiancées showed up at the same show.
Guest:Two of your brothers, Beyonce?
Guest:Yeah, and all of a sudden I hear, like, glasses break, and I go, hey, what's going on over there?
Guest:And he's like, Bobby, you just keep going, Bobby.
Guest:You just keep going, little Bobby.
Guest:You don't need nothing.
Guest:And they had knives out there.
Guest:The two chicks did?
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:Oh, my God.
Guest:So when I said my brother was a biker, yeah, he was a real deal.
Guest:Yeah, that was a real deal.
Marc:So there were three of you in this household.
Guest:And then my older sisters.
Marc:Oh, you got sisters, too?
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:Wow.
Guest:How many kids?
Guest:There's five of us.
Guest:It was a Catholic family, so that's a small Catholic family.
Marc:Now, was there ever a point where your dad sort of shifted gears and just became like a, you know, a drunken maniac?
Guest:No, my dad stopped drinking, but my old man also, in retirement, he became a magician.
Guest:He was Tom terrific.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Tom terrific.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And, you know, whatever.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Tom not so terrific.
Guest:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Guest:Like, his tricks always fell apart.
Guest:it was great so i had him open for me once yeah and he's bombing and so i get out i walk out and said he goes hey look at this is my dad you people shut the fuck up and so then he starts killing and he's going like okay dad do two more tricks he goes what's that five more oh no yeah yeah yeah i remember i i'd taken uh uh one of my exes over to meet him and he puts her head in a guillotine that he made in the basement oh no and then this bolt falls off
Guest:Is she still in it?
Guest:Yeah, I was like, oh, could have saved me a lot of grief.
Guest:I mean, he wouldn't have killed her, but he would have.
Guest:I was married once, and then I met you on the show.
Guest:I was engaged for five and a half years before, and now I've got the new wife.
Guest:I like her, the 09.
Guest:So two wives.
Guest:No, one wife.
Guest:Yeah, two wives.
Guest:Two wives.
Guest:But I like to think this is the real one.
Guest:This one's got legs.
Marc:It's a weird thing.
Marc:I imagine that even your first wife, as crazy as it might have been, initially it must have been great.
Guest:Well, you are drawn together.
Guest:I mean, you know, it's not like, you know, you go.
Guest:But I think my first wife and I, I think it was like, wow, you hate me as much as I do.
Guest:I think that's what we had in common.
Marc:That's probably why you were attracted to her.
Guest:You hate me.
Guest:I hate me, too.
Guest:Sure, sure.
Guest:Oh, we have so much in common.
Guest:Yeah, perfect.
Guest:So, yeah, I mean, I guess I'm a little flinchy, you know.
Guest:Right.
Guest:It's just, I think, also maturity and you get older and stuff.
Marc:Yeah, the energy starts to fade.
Marc:You don't have the energy for the drama.
Marc:You don't have it.
Marc:No, I got the energy for sex, but I don't have the energy for the drama.
Marc:It's exhausting.
Marc:It feels weird.
Marc:So you moved to Boston when you were, what, 18?
Guest:I moved there when I was 18.
Guest:I started doing comedy.
Guest:I got on Letterman when I was 20.
Marc:I got on those police academies.
Marc:I mean, let's talk about that because I haven't talked about that much on this show at all because I think you're the only one of that generation, that Boston, the original Boston stand-up scene, modern stand-up scene that I've talked to.
Marc:And I got to Boston.
Marc:I did a couple of open mics there when I was in college.
Marc:Now, the Ding Ho was a Chinese restaurant in Cambridge.
Marc:Right.
Marc:And it was, you know, it was the place where, I mean, the crew was really, was you, Lenny Clark, Kevin Meany, Kenny Rogerson.
Guest:Steve Sweeney.
Guest:Steve Sweeney.
Guest:Dennis Leary.
Marc:Stephen Wright.
Guest:Stephen Wright, Paula Poundstone.
Guest:Paula Poundstone.
Guest:Paula Poundstone, the first time I went there was the door woman.
Guest:Oh, she worked the door?
Guest:And then she got up on stage, yeah.
Guest:Yeah, I mean, that is an amazing... Jimmy Tingle.
Guest:Yeah, Jimmy Tingle.
Guest:And then, like, I was, like, the second wave with people like Tony Vee and myself.
Guest:And actually, Leary was kind of... Dan Spencer.
Marc:Dan Spencer and Tom Kenny a little bit, but... Right, because this... And it was just really a room, a bar, connected to a Chinese restaurant.
Marc:Sure.
Marc:And there was always stories, like, I missed out on the whole... All I remember is going up there once, and Lenny Clark was hosting, and he did literally 45 minutes in between acts.
Guest:In between acts.
Guest:Sure.
Marc:And you're sitting there waiting to go on an open mic.
Guest:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marc:And by the time you go on, it's like they're closing up and there's no one left.
Guest:But it was also just like really crazy.
Guest:I mean, it was like- How so?
Guest:Well, I mean, you know, I remember once walking to the gig and some bartender, she made the mistake of putting a Christmas tree on the stage as if it was going to be like, oh, cheer up the boys.
Guest:And I'm walking down the street going to the ding and I see the tree come flying through the door.
Guest:Oh, no.
Guest:Yeah?
Guest:And it was crimmies, you know, so then I came up on stage with a branch.
Guest:Oh, by the way, I'll tell this story really quick.
Guest:Like a few years ago, I had a Christmas tree after a breakup, and you're going, I have no sentimental attachment to these bulbs.
Guest:So I say to Sarah, who's my wife now, I was like,
Guest:I'm going to go get a BB gun and shoot the tree.
Guest:So I end up being a crack shot.
Guest:I'm a big indoor BB gun enthusiast, and I shot the Christmas tree.
Marc:You just shot the ornaments?
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:It was a blast.
Guest:About 11 bulbs in, she goes, give me that gun.
Guest:She starts shooting the tree, too.
Marc:Oh, really?
Marc:That's sort of like a closure thing.
Marc:It's sort of an exercise.
Marc:It was so much fun.
Marc:Out with the old.
Guest:Yeah, man.
Guest:And then I told the landlady, there's going to be some noise.
Guest:So was it a pelleted gun?
Guest:I threw the tree out the window.
Guest:Oh, you did?
Guest:So when we were in the Ding Ho, so in like, I remember like, and I don't talk about this, but your show- What year is this, 1979?
Guest:No, no, like 81, 80, 81.
Guest:But I will mention it here because it seems this is a much different program.
Guest:It's like, I don't drink, I don't take drugs.
Guest:I don't tell people not to.
Guest:That's my thing.
Guest:But I stopped when I was 19.
Guest:But when I was 19, I was doing drugs at the Ding Ho.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And I remember once-
Guest:sitting there and doing lines off the bar at the ding-ho, and we would cover up all the windows with cardboard boxes so we could party all night.
Guest:You guys just opened the taps?
Guest:Yeah, it was the pedlum.
Guest:The maniacs were running the asylum.
Guest:So we were just partying, and I remember the door cracks open, and three cops are silhouetted with daylight, and there's smoke, and I'm like, oh, I'm going to jail.
Guest:You know what I mean?
Guest:And they go...
Guest:Lenny, how the fuck are you?
Guest:And the fucking cops come in and just start partying with us.
Guest:Get out.
Guest:Oh, of course.
Guest:Oh, that was beautiful.
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:Lenny, you fucking cocksucker.
Guest:Fucking Lenny.
Guest:Well, those guys had their work.
Guest:You know, Ricky, this is tuna.
Guest:But it would be a lot of really crazy, crazy stories like that.
Marc:Well, that whole Clark crew, man.
Marc:I mean, Mark Clark used to run the door sometimes.
Marc:The youngest brother, right?
Marc:And Mike Clark, the older brother, used to book.
Marc:And Lenny was a comic.
Guest:I didn't know anything.
Guest:Yeah, but I remember once at...
Guest:I remember once, here's the other thing.
Guest:I'm not really ever into this whole thing of who's a thief and who's derivative.
Guest:I've never spent too much energy on it.
Marc:I can tell you that your joke about some new guy doing it, I've seen two or three times.
Guest:Yeah, and I've seen people do bits of mine and stuff, or even do versions.
Guest:I saw one recently.
Guest:I've seen people that do a version of my persona and stuff, and I don't get- Is Mitch Vitale still doing that?
Guest:right yeah i remember i was i was at his show once and i didn't know that he about that and i didn't know that he did a knockoff of it i don't really care you know whatever and and so he was doing that and then i got up to go to bathroom and he and he doesn't know me or whatever and he goes he goes where you going i've been on tv and i go yeah uh i've been on tv too and i was doing that same character and
Guest:Oh my, what happened?
Guest:Oh, that's fucking great.
Guest:Well, I've done that a lot, though.
Guest:I remember years ago, back in the day, this guy was kicking people off stage and doing a set, you know what I mean?
Guest:This guy was at Igby's, and he was just really right wing, and I really didn't like him, and he kept implying this woman, oh, you, like she was, you know, like, oh, you're retarded, blah, blah, blah.
Guest:I go, no, she's not laughing because you haven't done anything funny.
Guest:He goes, what was that?
Guest:You didn't think that was funny?
Guest:I go, no, I said you haven't done anything funny.
Guest:He goes, no, this is back.
Guest:My ego's way out of check, and it's like in the 80s.
Guest:He goes, well, who the fuck are you?
Guest:I go, I'm a comedian that if I walk up on that stage, the crowd's going to be so much happier to see me than you.
Guest:You know what?
Guest:Fuck, I will.
Guest:I walk up on stage, and I go, get the fuck off the stage.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Yeah.
Marc:So was that like at the peak of the career?
Guest:Yeah, yeah, and the crowd went nuts, you know?
Guest:Oh, that's fucking beautiful.
Guest:But smash cut to my life now, you know, San Marcos Island, performing in a fish restaurant comedy club.
Guest:Come on, dude.
Guest:But I'm not, I don't have a pity party.
Guest:You know, I have like such a,
Marc:No, but the weird thing is what became clear when you did the live show is that your chops are great, your material is still great, people still love you and remember you, and you're one of those people that I think everyone always respected and they really loved.
Marc:And then even when you just show up, I mean, you know how to be on stage.
Marc:I mean, the difference between...
Marc:you know you taking a stage and and like there was that other show we did up in san francisco where there were some younger dudes there they were doing fine but when you get up there there's very few people of of your ilk that can live up to the excitement of people just seeing you like you get to a certain point where people are like oh it's him and then like after that first three minutes like
Marc:Oh, yeah.
Guest:Well, I thank you.
Guest:That's a big compliment.
Guest:But I it's part of it is like this working class ethic.
Guest:You know, I got to do a show for the people.
Guest:You know, I mean, like I really do have that in my head.
Guest:So even when I when I may not be into it or even whatever, you know, I do I do try to work.
Guest:But right.
Guest:But at the same time, it's really funny.
Guest:I'm much more creative now doing, you know, writing my screenplays and things like that.
Guest:No, but the thing that's funny is that I'm also still writing more stand-up now, which is brand new, which is really weird.
Marc:But the thing is, there's something so immediate and something so... To have a direct conversation with an audience and have it be honest, which it seemed to me that there was a point in your career... I don't know when you decided on the character.
Marc:I mean, when you talk about doing drugs at 18, what was it at that... When did you hit the wall?
Marc:Shortly after that?
Guest:You know, just like, you know, you don't stop because it's going well.
Guest:You know what I mean?
Guest:No, no, I get that.
Guest:And as a kid, I was just like, you know, I was just taking drugs and drinking and I'd end up in jail and all that kind of stuff.
Guest:And it just, you know.
Marc:But did someone reach out to you?
Guest:Was it that moment where it's the- No, it was more like going, wow, I really can't do this.
Guest:And so I'm going to go get some help.
Guest:I'm going to go to the boohoo meetings.
Marc:And you did it.
Marc:But- The state's over that long.
Marc:So you've been sober 30 years.
Guest:29, I realized.
Guest:I thought I was 30, but I even counted wrong.
Marc:Now, when did the character take shape?
Marc:I mean, coming out of doing Kaufman and cutting up fish and everything else, when did you realize that you could time your jokes with that intonation?
Guest:Well, I think it was all at the same time.
Guest:First, it was this guy.
Guest:I'd come on stage, and I'd read a Dear John letter.
Guest:That's kind of really the birth of it.
Guest:Well, that and another character, but I'd go on there, and it was a real Dear John letter, and I'd be crying, and I'd be like, and you people want to hear jokes?
Yeah.
Guest:Two guys walk into it and I'd be crying.
Guest:Oh, so it came from this state crying?
Guest:Well, it was real crying.
Guest:I mean, I was really sincere.
Guest:You know, I just stay in this character.
Guest:But then when I got performing on stage and people were making fun of the persona, I became mean and he became angry.
Guest:And I sound like Jerry Lewis now, you know, talking in third person.
Guest:But it became like I didn't want people to think I was making fun of this persona.
Guest:So it became angry to defend itself in rough clubs.
Marc:Okay, and that was before you became big, in other words, that the edge to the character developed itself out of judgment?
Guest:Sure, I mean, those clubs in Boston were so rough, yeah, so that's where it was.
Marc:So when the character started snapping, that's when it became...
Guest:Right.
Marc:Well, there's a safety in it.
Marc:It's amazing that when you can really be angry on stage and still be funny, however it's possible, that's a gift.
Guest:And it's also very lucrative, but I'm not willing to do that anymore.
Marc:No, I understand that.
Guest:Because it's like a bar never emptied out because they said, two guys are getting along in the parking lot.
Guest:Right.
Guest:So I made a decision maybe 10 years ago where I said, okay, I'm not going to celebrity bash too much, and I'm not going to say things that incite just to incite.
Guest:Like, if I'm going to say something, I'm going to say it because I believe in it, and that's it.
Guest:Do you know what I mean?
Guest:Sure.
Guest:And it was a big metamorphosis.
Guest:And then a few years ago I said, okay, even if people are expecting this persona, I'm not going to do that anymore.
Guest:And plenty of places, plenty of markets I perform, there's people going, do this.
Marc:the voice you know um but but i kind of stick to my guns but i mean but is it like a like because i remember initially when you stopped doing the voice what what was the the sort of arc of that hitting the wall was it that around the jay leno thing and everything else when you know i think like setting the tonight's on fire or something else it's like it's like i was still in this mode of like trying to make it
Guest:But you'd already made it, right?
Guest:No, but I had made it.
Guest:You know what I mean?
Marc:Let's do the timeline.
Marc:So you're in Boston.
Marc:You're 18.
Marc:You stay there until you're 20.
Marc:You got the Letterman hit.
Guest:Yeah, and then I got a police academy.
Guest:Oh, before all that, though, I went to San Francisco, and I started performing on Alex Bennett's radio show.
Marc:But you did Letterman before you went to San Francisco.
Guest:Yeah, but still, it was really weird.
Guest:I did one Letterman, and I went into San Francisco, started doing Bennett's radio show a lot, and then...
Guest:I was playing theaters and stuff.
Marc:So when Alex Bennett's radio show was still vital and defined the San Francisco comedy scene, that's where you took off.
Marc:You became like a hometown hero, and that was it.
Guest:Yeah, which was weird, because I didn't really live there, and then they got mad when I moved to Hollywood.
Marc:But that's an interesting thing, though.
Marc:They'll take ownership of you very quickly, San Francisco, because you blew up there on some level.
Marc:And a lot of people did that from Boston, because of those Ding Ho people.
Marc:Like Meany.
Marc:Meany and Poundstone, right?
Guest:Yeah, true, yeah.
Marc:And you, those three, and Dana Gould, I think, too.
Guest:Yeah, definitely, yeah.
Marc:So those three, four, that started there, did they all follow you, or did you all show up there?
Guest:No, Poundstone was first.
Guest:The first time I played San Francisco, I was featuring for her, which is such a weird, insane bill.
Guest:But that was what, 82, 83?
Guest:I remember in San Francisco, people would hear me on the radio show, so they wanted to see what I looked like, so I started performing in a cardboard box.
Guest:And then by the end, they'd be really mad.
Guest:I'd go, do you want to see what I look like?
Guest:And I'd cut a slit in the box and put an 8x10 out.
Guest:And then I'd say, good night, and they'd wheel me on stage.
Marc:That's fucking hilarious.
Marc:So you were always pretty conceptual.
Marc:You really kept the spirit of that Kaufman thing going outside of not... The audiences liked you, and you let them, but you still got pretty weird.
Guest:Yeah, I mean, I did stuff that, yeah, that, you know, but even like, you know, I was on a comic relief and I dressed up as Christ and did magic tricks, you know, as the amazing Christo.
Guest:Now, I wasn't in the character.
Guest:I was like, I go, hi, you know, water to wine, wine to water, tap to deck, and back to rice again.
Guest:Hi, I'm the amazing Christo.
Guest:I don't claim to be Christ, merely an illusionist with the ability to recreate some of his most show-stopping and startling routines.
Guest:And, you know, I did magic tricks as Christ.
Guest:People were so mad.
Guest:I remember that there was a woman that had a sign that said, I heart Bobcat.
Guest:And she was up in the balcony.
Guest:And as I ate shit, as I bombed.
Marc:With Christo?
Guest:Yeah, as Christo, yeah.
Guest:I see her I heart Bobcat sign going lower and lower.
Guest:Much like the real Christ.
Guest:You were with the Galilean.
Guest:So, and I remember Billy Criswell, I really ate shit.
Guest:I was walking by, Billy goes, you got some big balls.
Guest:And I remember Marissa Tomei was giving me a bad attitude.
Guest:Yeah, the makeup woman wouldn't put... I had a beard and long hair, and then I had this Bob Mackie Christ outfit.
Guest:Yeah, but she has no problem showing her cans and dropping the fucking laundry.
Guest:Well, Catholics are weird.
Guest:Yeah, I know that.
Guest:Trust me.
Guest:So I think it's always kind of funny people who...
Marc:you know the the jesus thing but whatever so there was that time though because i remember when i saw you when you you lost a lot of weight you were almost emaciated yeah and a little aidsy yeah but there was almost like uh you had a sort of um spite against the character like you i think you've seemed to have found some happy medium because you have a certain self-acceptance but there was a time there you're like not only am i not gonna do it
Guest:I'm going to do Pauly Shore's character.
Guest:I'm going to really hurt you.
Guest:No, I didn't.
Guest:Yeah, well, it's a weird thing, you know?
Guest:And I made decisions as a young man that most comedians make in their 30s, you know, in my early 20s, you know,
Guest:Would I have done Police Academy?
Guest:I don't know.
Guest:I've jokingly said that I like to do a short where the 48-year-old me time travels back and talks the 22-year-old out of doing Police Academy.
Guest:Well, I know the 22-year-old Bobcat would tell me to go fuck myself anyway.
Marc:Was there any hesitation at that time?
Guest:Oh, sure, sure, sure.
Guest:Based on what?
Guest:Sure, I just, Police Academy, I don't watch these movies.
Guest:You were in the first one, though.
Guest:I was in, no, I was in two.
Guest:The first one's shit.
Guest:Two, it gets really good.
Guest:No, I was in two, three, and four.
Marc:Okay, so you knew the franchise.
Guest:I knew it, yeah.
Marc:And you knew you were gonna, because I remember
Guest:And I had managers going, you do it.
Guest:It's not going to affect your career.
Guest:It doesn't.
Guest:Now, on the other side of it, maybe it did help.
Guest:Maybe like now that's what's still paying the bills when I go to a small venue and people don't know, you know, not familiar.
Guest:I mean, most people aren't familiar that I do do stand up.
Guest:I mean, I know you do in comics and stuff, but but even a lot of young comics don't know.
Marc:But wait, but that but that the meat CD, what was it?
Marc:Meet Bob.
Marc:Meet Bob.
Marc:I mean, that was a big record.
Marc:I mean, was it not?
Guest:It was kind of funny.
Guest:You know, I'll tell this story because I toured with Nirvana.
Guest:I opened for Nirvana.
Guest:And Kurt had that record pretty memorized.
Guest:So when I was opening for him, when I was doing anything from that record, he's like, that's old material.
Guest:And I'm like, why don't you write a new album?
Guest:Fuck you.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:What was he like?
Guest:He was very, very sweet to me.
Guest:He and I got along really well.
Guest:I met him at a college radio station in Ann Arbor when they had made Bleach, and he wanted to meet me, which was really weird.
Marc:Because he was a fan of that record.
Guest:He wanted to interview me, so there was this tape floating around.
Guest:If someone ever has it, let me know.
Guest:Is it out there?
Guest:Well, I don't know, but he's interviewing me.
Guest:He's just mumbling, and I'm going, ah!
Guest:he's asking questions from a paper pie so he loved your comedy well i know and people go really it's like finding out like that you know jimmy hendrix was a big buddy hackett fan sure but but yeah he he was down with it and and it makes sense you were pretty punk rock i mean you had that sensibility i mean when you started i mean so so he yeah so so i did a date with cheap trick which was pretty funny because they go they they get in japan
Guest:No, but I went on and then they go on it.
Guest:And then they go, hey, do you want to go out and do the encore?
Guest:It's Surrender.
Guest:And they give me a guitar and I go, awesome.
Guest:And I go, I get on stage and I go to Rick Nielsen.
Guest:I go, what key is this in?
Guest:He goes, you're not plugged in, man.
Guest:And I go, fuck yeah.
Guest:So I'm doing these Pete Townsend windmills across the stage and duck walking.
Guest:I couldn't fucking move after that.
Guest:But Kurt had heard that I did these rock shows.
Guest:So he asked if I wanted to try to MC or go on.
Guest:And so I did it in, the first one was in Chicago.
Guest:It's this story.
Guest:I'm not proud of this story.
Guest:Because I don't think I would say this kind of thing now.
Guest:But it was when Michael Jordan had retired from basketball.
Guest:And none of us are jocks, so we don't know what the fuck's going on.
Guest:We show up in Chicago.
Guest:It says, Michael, we still love you.
Guest:All these signs on the yards and stuff.
Guest:And so I get on stage and I go, hey, I feel bad for Michael Jordan, but for $40 million a year, I'd shoot my own dad in the fucking head.
Guest:And there was a noise that wasn't booing.
Guest:It was just...
Guest:Like, fuck you, kill him.
Guest:And I just go, oh, fuck you, punk rockers.
Guest:Like, your mom and dad dropped you off in minivans.
Guest:You could suck it.
Guest:I'll talk all night.
Guest:You'll never see your precious nirvanas.
Guest:And the only person laughing is Kurt, of course, when I walked by him.
Guest:He's like, I can't believe you said that, man.
Guest:So we would... Oh, fuck.
Marc:So you just bombed?
Marc:You just tanked it out?
Guest:Most of the time, I would eat shit.
Guest:I remember once, I was talking to the...
Guest:It's funny, Marilyn Manson ended up doing a video similar to this, but we were talking about videos, and Kurt wanted to do the video for All Apologies was just going to be him drunk with a gun at a party.
Guest:And he said, well, MTV won't let me use guns.
Guest:And I wanted it to be, I go, well, look, you're the most misunderstood person in that song, so how about if you're Lee Harvey?
Guest:So the song is, you're looking right in the lines, and you're singing...
Guest:and you're assembling what we think is a gun, and then you shoot Kennedy, which would be Chris and Dave, one of them is Jackie O. And he goes, but we can't use guns.
Guest:I go, no, here's the thing.
Guest:It's going to be a pie.
Guest:So you throw a pie down, and the meringue will be the back of Kennedy's head getting blown off.
Guest:And he lit up, and he starts laughing.
Guest:He goes, yeah, that's a good idea.
Guest:Did they do it?
Guest:And the road manager goes, you two don't get to travel together anymore.
Guest:But I rappelled a nude from the roof of the Oakland Coliseum on New Year's because it was the year Bill Graham had passed away and he used to come down as baby New Year's or something like that.
Guest:Yeah, I can't remember.
Guest:So I was like, you know, and by the way, I ate shit a lot over in front of me around it.
Guest:And people are always like, you know, hecklers and all.
Guest:It's like, I got hit with M80s.
Guest:What year was that?
Guest:i don't know it was their last tour so was that like 95 all right so like you were in you were already sort of like on a you know your career oh definitely on the way down yeah yeah well yeah it's a stand-up shirt certainly so i would go out and sometimes it'd go well but but it'd almost be like if it went well were you doing the character then i would no but i definitely yeah i think like you know there's like different levels it's like
Guest:You start eating shit, and I was like, you know, it comes back.
Guest:To save the day.
Guest:Hey, here it is.
Guest:Remember this?
Guest:Aga, aga, aga.
Guest:I'm not going to do that character.
Guest:That's a stupid persona.
Guest:Unless sweat activates it.
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:Except when you get hit in the head with Bibles and M80s.
Guest:I got hit with a teenager once.
Guest:They successfully threw a kid out of the pit, and I was in my knees buckle, and there's this little kid crab walking off stage.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:So, I go to Kurt, I go, you know, fuck you, I'm tired of being your scatter, you know, that was Elvis' chimp scatter.
Guest:I go, how'd you call Pauly Shore or something and have him cheer you up?
Guest:And so, we were at the- Did he laugh at that?
Guest:Sure, yeah, like, I guess we were friends in a weird way.
Guest:Like, when he went on stage, he'd often give me his wallet and things to hold.
Guest:Oh, yeah.
Guest:Is that strange?
Guest:I don't know why.
Guest:No.
Guest:Well, John Cusack made that mistake during one crazy summer, apparently.
Guest:I forgot this story, and I ordered a bunch of shit off the line.
Guest:I mean, on TV, because all of a sudden there's Thighmasters being delivered to our hotel in Freedom Rock.
Guest:Freedom Rock!
Guest:Yeah, just cases and cases of that shit, because Cusack left his card out.
Guest:So we're at the Oakland Coliseum, and they're trying to explain everything, because it's New Year, so we're going to have bombs going off.
Guest:It's going to be a big deal.
Guest:Sure.
Guest:and uh they make out of it's right out of spinal tap they make out of the lunch meet the band stand like okay here's the drum riser here's out of food and stuff and the bombs are like m&ms or something yeah don't stand here guys it's really serious shit you know so um so i'm gonna repel a nude and uh i
Guest:I like how vain I am.
Guest:I still wore a hat.
Guest:I had no problem with people seeing my cock, not my balding pate.
Guest:So I'm horizontal at New Year's.
Guest:They go and they say, well, Kurt, you count down to 10 or something and we'll tell you when.
Guest:So I'm holding my whole weight on a repelling cable.
Guest:And he just goes, hey, Oakland, you want a drum solo?
Guest:Because he looks up and I'm giving him the fucking brown eye.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Then finally he just goes, one, and I slide down.
Guest:I got a rope right out of my ass and stomach and I, bam, I landed right behind him and...
Guest:But I did learn this.
Guest:If you're naked at midnight, you don't get a kiss.
Guest:There was a diameter all around me.
Guest:Any young comics or anybody who wants to be nude publicly, give it a tug.
Guest:You're going to thank me later on.
Guest:I've seen some photos of that night.
Guest:I'm not really.
Marc:A little retracted.
Marc:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marc:Well, there's some guys do nude comedy.
Marc:They have nude comedy shows now.
Marc:Really?
Marc:Yeah, like regular stand-up.
Marc:All nude.
Marc:I saw it in Edinburgh.
Marc:I don't have the guts to do it.
Guest:But do they talk about their body?
Marc:No, I mean, they just do stand-up naked.
Guest:And as they bomb, does it go in?
Guest:I have no idea.
Guest:Does it retract?
Marc:I just couldn't handle it.
Marc:I couldn't go.
Marc:I didn't want to be part of it.
Marc:Nude comedy?
Marc:Yeah, just nude stand-up.
Marc:Just nudin' it up.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:It's unbelievable.
Marc:Okay, so you did the Police Academy movies, and then there was the one with Dabney Coleman.
Guest:What was that called?
Guest:Oh, it's the movie that doesn't have a name in my house.
Guest:My daughter didn't even know the name of that movie.
Guest:It was always called that fucking horse movie.
Guest:H2T, Hot the Trot.
Guest:Yeah, that was the end of my career.
Marc:That was the death?
Guest:Yeah, I found the script recently and it was really funny.
Guest:I had a manager at the time and I had written across the script, why would I do this?
Guest:And he wrote a dollar sign.
Marc:I remember when that came out, and I remember I went to see it.
Marc:We were all rooting for you.
Guest:Well, that was a horrible experience making that movie.
Guest:But it was something recently a friend of my wife had kind of pitched a show that she would star in.
Guest:And I said, I'm going to tell you something that no one ever told me.
Guest:Don't do it.
Guest:Because money comes and goes, doesn't really matter.
Guest:You're the one that's going to have to talk about it if it's a hit.
Guest:You're the one that's going to have to talk about it if it's a bomb.
Guest:Your friends that are pitching you, if they're your real friends, they care about you and they're going to understand it.
Guest:You can say no.
Guest:But a lot of people operate with a career and you just say yes.
Guest:Or I never thought of myself in terms of a five-year plan.
Guest:I just said yes to whatever came along.
Marc:And they'll talk you into it too.
Guest:And also, you get in this whole trap.
Guest:It's a movie.
Guest:You start making money, and you got bills.
Guest:Hey, you got to buy a house, a tax rate, blah, blah, blah.
Guest:And the way I live my life now is completely the opposite.
Guest:I really just stopped doing things I wouldn't watch.
Marc:So you hit the wall, you did that movie, and that was the end of it, and you had a lot of money, and then you went through the divorce, right?
Guest:Well, I had to feed this beast that it was a lot of money that was being spent.
Marc:You were living high in the hog.
Guest:But not really, if you know me.
Guest:I mean, the most expensive thing I probably had was fancy cigars, you know.
Guest:Sure.
Marc:Those aren't that expensive.
Guest:And I would, yeah, there was this big machine, a lot of money going out, and I was just, you know, everything, you know.
Guest:Between houses, cars, wives.
Guest:I was the voice of it.
Guest:Voice of a Dirty Rabbit, paying for schools, which I'm glad.
Guest:That's the one thing I look back and I feel like, well, there was money well spent.
Guest:My stepson and my daughter got a good education.
Guest:But the rest of the stuff is really silly.
Guest:I'm with somebody now who just like... I've written a bunch of movies, but the last two movies I made were at Sundance.
Guest:I don't think people know that.
Guest:But...
Guest:And the one was she read the script and she's like, this is a good script.
Guest:We should make it.
Guest:I go, well, I don't have any money.
Guest:She goes, well, just make him, people.
Guest:And that's how we did it.
Guest:Which one?
Guest:It's called Sleeping Dogs Lie.
Guest:We got a crew from Craigslist.
Guest:We shot it in two weeks when I was on hiatus from Kimmel.
Guest:And then it went on to Sundance and it was crazy, you know, and then that's how we do it.
Guest:You know, we're about to start a new movie right now, actually.
Marc:Well, so you were the first director of Kimmel.
Guest:No, there was a couple before me, but I was there for over 300-some shows.
Marc:Now, this period in time where you sort of fell out of the public eye and you went through whatever travails you went through with divorce and going broke and whatnot, or everyone completely broke, I mean, what were you thinking?
Marc:I mean, were there fucking dark nights of the soul, for Christ's sake?
Guest:Well, I never went completely broke, but I got to the point where...
Guest:You know, you know, I'm hosting a goddamn game show.
Guest:You know what I mean?
Guest:I'm doing the voice of a dirty rabbit on the fucking WB.
Guest:I'm just doing whatever you have to do.
Guest:And I'm surrounded by people that tell me that I would miss stand up and that I, you know, I mean, I just wanted you to get out there.
Guest:Yeah, and so now- Make money.
Guest:And now, and then everything changed.
Guest:But I jokingly say this, but it's true.
Guest:I retired from comedy at this precise time.
Guest:They stopped hiring me, so it worked out really well.
Guest:And when did you do Shakes?
Guest:Shakes was in the middle of all that.
Guest:But Shakes is a-
Guest:You know, I didn't finance Shakes.
Guest:That's a common.
Marc:And that was the first movie, though, right?
Guest:Yeah, that was the first.
Guest:I made a short before that, that David Spade's in and Kathy Griffin.
Guest:Before Kathy was known or anything.
Guest:Yeah, it's called The Making of Bikini School 3.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And then I made Shakes, which in my head, you know, I was really angry.
Guest:I don't make excuses for it because Shakes does have its fans.
Guest:It's really funny.
Marc:No, it's a movie about stand-up, really.
Marc:Yeah, it is, yeah.
Guest:And, like, Tom Kenny and I, we just, and Robin and a couple other people from Shakespeare, we went and they had a, they played it at the Silent Movie House in L.A.
Guest:here, and it was packed, and there was people that had the dialogue memorized, and there was women dressed up as clown whores, and I felt like that sketch with Shatner on Star Trek where I wanted to go, get a life.
Yeah.
Marc:They were trying to make the new Rocky Horror.
Guest:I don't know.
Guest:Tom Kenny and I leaned over and looked at each other in the middle of the movie going, what the fuck were we thinking?
Guest:I don't know.
Guest:Look what we've unleashed.
Marc:Well, it must have been flattering on some level.
Guest:Oh, I'm glad that it has its fans.
Guest:But like...
Guest:i i don't think in terms of the movies i'm making like this one's gonna re-establish me you know i really just make these things because i write them and they come out of me and you direct them and i direct and you had an interest in that so you and i'm not in them oh more than anything i mean this is what interests me more than anything it's the thing i really love doing the most now when you directed television i mean that was like a job i mean tv directing is different right yeah but still it was it was fulfilling i mean like when when i would go out and shoot a bit with kimmel and and it would make it to the air and people laughed that was
Guest:really great how'd you get that job but did you Jimmy Jimmy you know Jimmy's an old friend still is you know and then and then um but I also worked a little bit on the Chappelle show and then I made a movie for Jimmy called Windy City Heat which has its fans too so he really transitioned into director yeah pretty thoroughly I mean like successfully right and the second movie was the dog movie
Guest:Yeah, Sleeping Dogs Live.
Guest:It was called Stay when we were at Sundance.
Guest:I didn't see that movie.
Guest:Also known as the dog blowjob movie.
Guest:But it's not about dog blowjobs.
Guest:It's not an exploration of bestiality.
Guest:I just needed something that someone had in their past that they couldn't get past.
Guest:And when we were at Sundance...
Guest:I had not seen the movie in front of a full audience yet.
Guest:I hadn't seen it in more than 10 people.
Guest:So I'm sitting in this theater and the incident happens where there's the tasteful amount of bestiality.
Guest:Just enough.
Guest:Just enough.
Guest:Just the, yeah.
Guest:You know what it is?
Guest:A spice.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:So that scene starts off and this woman's behind me and she wants to leave and she's trying to pull her friend out of the theater.
Guest:It's packed and she's trying to pull her friend out.
Guest:And then about an hour later, that same woman was crying watching the movie and, um,
Guest:My daughter goes, look at your friend now.
Guest:And I look, and my daughter goes, yeah, you cry, bitch.
Guest:You cry.
Guest:That movie, even more than the one I did with Robin, World's Greatest Dad, it seems to, when it works for people, they do tend to cry a lot at that.
Guest:It's a kind of emotional movie.
Guest:It's, I don't know.
Guest:And then the one I made with Robin is another movie, and that's more about me becoming an adult.
Guest:You know, about two days in, Robin goes...
Guest:I'm playing you, right?
Guest:I go, yeah, pretty much.
Marc:And he's always been a friend of yours, right?
Guest:Yeah, we've known each other since, I met him when I was 19, but we've been friends probably since I was like about 20, 21.
Guest:He's a very sweet guy.
Guest:He's the best.
Guest:He read the screenplay for World's Greatest Dad thinking he was going to help me out and play a small part.
Guest:and help it get made and then he said hey man could I play Lance you know who is the lead and I was like yeah and then I did do this like I go is he gonna listen to me you know what I mean like am I gonna say yeah I'm gonna say hey let's do it again just do this one really quiet and he's gonna say hey I have an Oscar and you are in Hot to Trot I think we're gonna fucking do it my way
Guest:But he was amazing to work with.
Guest:He really was.
Marc:He's a very gracious guy.
Guest:And then all my friends are in that one.
Guest:And this new one we're gearing up to do, I'm bringing about 99% of the gang back, too.
Guest:Who?
Guest:Name them.
Guest:Oh, like Tom Kenny, Jill Talley.
Guest:Joel Murray's going to be in it.
Guest:He's going to be the lead.
Guest:You still use Kramer?
Guest:I haven't, but that's a good idea.
Guest:I mean, you know, see, I'm just bringing... Oh, if we're throwing out names, I'm available.
Guest:I'll put the band back together.
Guest:Maybe you don't want to be in this one.
Guest:How do you know?
Guest:The last one, bestiality and auto-erotic asphyxiation.
Marc:I'd like to, I just would like to see, like I've only done one small bit in a movie, and I thought like- Paging Mr. Herman.
Marc:No, no, it was a little better.
Marc:I did, I was in Almost Famous.
Marc:I was the angry promoter.
Marc:I went, you know, I had one scene.
Marc:But when I watched myself on camera on in the movie theater, I wasn't like, oh, fuck, because a lot of times I'll watch other people and I'm very critical of myself.
Marc:But especially with comics, a lot of times I can I can see them trying to act because I know them.
Marc:And I was really just being myself for the most part.
Marc:And I thought I fit the screen pretty well.
Guest:But I think I learned a lot about directing comics and through, you know, I was on Larry Sanders and I.
Guest:Shandling would go, all right, well, let's just do it again.
Guest:And I'd go, were we rolling?
Guest:Yeah, yeah, we'll just do it.
Guest:You know what I mean?
Guest:Like you didn't even know?
Guest:And not that big thing, you know?
Guest:Right, right.
Guest:And I remember the day it was over.
Marc:You were directing or you were just on the show?
Guest:No, I was just on the show, you know?
Marc:Right.
Guest:Like I was going to, I ran into Shandling and I wanted to throw up on Regis and Kathie Lee.
Guest:That was, in real life, that's what I was going to do.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And so...
Guest:I was going to have, like, a big grand slam or something and then bring EpiCac in a coffee mug and then go and get her going about, like... This is a real thing?
Guest:Yeah, this is real.
Guest:Like, I was going to go tell them, you know, like, go, hey, how's Cody?
Guest:And then take a swig and then throw up.
Guest:On live television.
Guest:Yeah, if I could hit both of them, that would be awesome, right?
Guest:And I tell Shanley, they just go, oh, that's great.
Guest:Can you put it on the show?
Guest:And I'm like, no, but I really want to do it.
Guest:So then we tell that story on Shanley.
Guest:Then I go to do the show, and they go, um...
Guest:They patted me down and they found the bottle of Epicac.
Guest:I go, hey, man, that was just a bid.
Guest:And then they go, oh, really?
Guest:What's this?
Guest:Oh, no.
Guest:So I go out on the show and they go, we're going to give you a fire extinguisher because I'd set Leno on fire, you know, and his show on fire.
Guest:And so I just take the fire extinguisher, pull the pin out and just hit the two of them.
Guest:And he ran off the air and I shot it out of her skirt.
Guest:And they said it was the largest spike ever in the history of the show.
Guest:Really?
Guest:Yeah, yeah.
Guest:It was just like everyone said, get in here.
Guest:Fucking nut.
Guest:He's going crazy.
Guest:Do you miss doing that stuff?
Guest:No, not really.
Guest:I think it came out of a frustration of not wanting, believe it or not, two things.
Guest:One, not wanting to be on those shows anymore when I wasn't promoting anything.
Guest:And two, I think it was also almost like because they were making it available to me.
Guest:Leno wanted me on the show because I had gone on.
Guest:And I was very self-destructive then.
Guest:It was like, how dare you like me?
Marc:What was that coming from?
Marc:Just because of the character still?
Guest:No, it was my big ego.
Guest:It was like this idea that he should have had me on before.
Guest:But the real down deep, I was afraid of being accepted on a mass level in America, because I've always considered that you were doing something wrong.
Guest:Do you know what I mean?
Marc:Sure, it's the sellout integrity.
Guest:But the reality of it is, but it's not what it is, is when you are accepted or when you are making stuff, then you really had to, you know, you've got to put the tire to the...
Guest:you know to the asphalt you know it's like it's like comics who go on stage and spend all their time talking about who's a hack and who's this who's that and i'm like hey man why don't you write some material no that's true but it's just interesting to me that like you know given that you still had that sense of of uniqueness and integrity yet you know you must have had a fairly large bag of self-hatred for some of the decisions you made on top of it of course of course how dare you hire me i fucking hurt you hard so the i remember when i got hired at the wb
Guest:Within the first day, I told the guy that ran the network that I was going to kick him in the cunt.
Guest:And I used that language because I go, well, he can't sue me.
Guest:He doesn't really have a vagina.
Guest:But in the meantime, if the guy at craft service said, I worked with Bobcat Goldthread, I didn't like him, that would kill me.
Guest:That would make me want to jump off a building.
Guest:So a lot of it wasn't... I've got the inverted thing that most... No, no, I get it.
Guest:The schmooze chromosome is inverted in me.
Marc:But the weird thing about... Well, yeah, because those are real people in your mind.
Marc:The other people are just people that exploit you and force you to make decisions that made you hate yourself.
Marc:yeah all right so that's okay then maybe i shouldn't beat myself up too bad no no i understand it but i just think it's interesting that that a lot of this you know insanity and the self-destruction thing you know just came out of this this anger for for this like industry that basically you know on some level turns you out right but also had been pretty goddamn nice to me too but were you thinking that at the time no no no but i also i don't i i'm sincere here man yeah
Guest:I don't even know what I was angry about when I was... You know, when you're 20, 22, I was just furious, man.
Guest:Yeah, I know.
Guest:Furious.
Guest:And some of it was... You know, that's the problem with celebrity bashing.
Guest:What you're really saying is, fuck you, I should be famous, or fuck you, I should be rich.
Guest:You know what I mean?
Guest:You know, I...
Marc:Kinda, or just out of the same place, because I have to do the same thing.
Marc:I spent a lot of time on stage defying audiences to like me, which is what you did, but you found a character which they genuinely liked.
Marc:There was part of you that was like, you could have went, oh, fuck you, in that voice.
Guest:It still does, but this is pretty funny.
Guest:Sometimes I've noticed when I'm talking about things that are not going over, I will point out to the audience that if I did it in that persona, they'd be fine with it.
Guest:A woman should have the right to have a safe abortion.
Guest:Ah!
Guest:And they laugh and cheer.
Guest:Right, yeah.
Marc:Because the delivery system is what's funny.
Guest:Yeah, they think, oh, he's not really serious.
Guest:But I will say this.
Guest:Performing in the alternative comedy rooms, and I hate that term, but performing them and then going up and then being accepted is one thing.
Guest:But, like, when I'm going out and doing stand-up, you know, I'm in, like, you know, I was in a bowling alley in Washington State in the eastern part of the state this weekend.
Guest:And I was still saying, you know, hey, teabaggers.
Guest:And there was clearly people who were Tea Party members.
Guest:And they were like, woo!
Guest:And I was like, yeah, you know, well, you are a racist organization.
Guest:It's fine.
Guest:You know, clearly what it is is, like...
Guest:Where were you during the Clinton administration?
Guest:I was like, clearly it was like racists needed new words to call the president.
Guest:So they were like, he's a, you're a socialist.
Guest:What's a socialist?
Guest:I don't know, but I know they like fried chicken.
Guest:Right.
Guest:And does that go over?
Guest:They get mad.
Guest:I had people getting mad at me.
Guest:But I still try to do the stuff that I'm not compromising myself.
Marc:But that's interesting because in the same sense that the anger was, you could have been saying what you really felt in the character, but they wouldn't see past the character.
Guest:But I was.
Guest:Right, that's what I mean.
Guest:Here's the thing.
Guest:I hope people who go to the show enjoyed the show, but I hope they didn't swallow every fucking thing I had to say.
Guest:Yeah, and it's also interesting that- I don't want to lead a bun rally.
Guest:I want people to go, oh, I like that joke.
Guest:Think about it differently.
Guest:No, I didn't like that joke.
Guest:Right, sure.
Marc:Well, I think one of the reasons you're so comfortable now is that, you know, you're sort of you have self-acceptance and you're also being more true to yourself.
Marc:You were not in any way hackneyed.
Marc:Your heroes were all were interesting rebel comedians.
Guest:You know, I mean, I love like Carla.
Guest:Right.
Guest:You know, all the biggies prior.
Marc:But even Kaufman and whoever you were sort of gunning when you were... You dug the absurdity.
Guest:Sure.
Marc:And you were always taking sort of the higher road on an artistic level.
Marc:And it seems to me that, you know, in talking to you, that at some point you became a hostage of this character.
Guest:Well, and also just like... I would never address things like... Like Kinison would say that I stole my act from him or something.
Guest:It's like, what joke...
Guest:What thing in my act did I steal from him?
Guest:But because I just thought that was so absurd, I never... Do you know what I mean?
Guest:It's like... There was some weird feud.
Guest:Well, he had a feud because he's coked up and he invented everything.
Guest:I invented interchangeable parts.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:I invented water.
Marc:Steve probably used to do a joke about that.
Marc:I used to say, when you're coming up, Steve, he goes, why do you know Sam invented the printing press and water?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:So so so I made the mistake of being popular at the same time.
Guest:But I mean, my act.
Guest:Yeah, he screamed and I screamed.
Guest:But I kind of think I never really saw his act.
Guest:I think he was a little influenced by me at one point.
Guest:And I think he had a hard time living with that.
Guest:And so and because I didn't like challenge him and say, fuck you, I'm the king of screaming comedy.
Guest:I'm number one because he was pursuing things that I never thought was important.
Guest:You know, chasing after celebrities and having your picture taken with porn stars.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:You're the king of screaming?
Guest:What the fuck?
Guest:It just seems so infantile.
Guest:The other day I was at Staples, and I'm like, who the fuck in 2011 would dress like a fat Dice Clay?
Guest:And I go, oh, it's Dice Clay.
Guest:So there's Dice.
Marc:He talks about going to Staples.
Guest:And he's in Staples, and I'm looking at him, and I'm like...
Guest:And he's got the leather coat on.
Guest:He's like, I need three-hole paper.
Guest:I was like, oh, dear Jesus.
Guest:Did you say hi to him?
Guest:I tried to take a picture with him.
Guest:And then I was thinking, this would be awesome if Emo was trying to take a picture of me taking a picture of Dice Clay.
Guest:It'd be really meta.
Marc:Right.
Marc:But on some level, at this point in your life, I mean, do you see yourself, I mean, you know, Dice was a huge star.
Marc:Sam was a huge star.
Marc:You were a huge comedy star.
Marc:I mean, is there still, like, can you accept that Dice did his dicing?
Guest:Oh, no, that Dice was popular.
Guest:It was fine.
Guest:I mean, what I found absurd was that he needed the people in Staples to know that he was still Dice Clay.
Guest:That's what was absurd to me.
Guest:That's what made me sad and weird.
Guest:You know what I mean?
Guest:It'd be like me walking around there going,
Guest:You know, I mean, you know, I'm making a musical right now.
Guest:Ray Davis of the Kings.
Guest:Oh, really?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:And it's and it's it's this isn't the movie I'm starting right now, but it's one that I've been trying to get going and we'll get going.
Guest:It's on a really good track.
Guest:It's an album from the 70s.
Guest:It's something I wanted to do since I was 13 years old.
Guest:It's called School Boys in Disgrace.
Guest:It was based on the Preservation albums.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:Now, and Ray and I get along, and it's like, here's this hero of mine, and it's very, very exciting.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:But, you know, when people approach Ray about things, Ray's about waking up today and writing a new song.
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:You know what I'm saying?
Guest:Yeah.
Guest:He doesn't hate Lola.
Yeah.
Guest:You know what I mean?
Guest:And I can relate to that.
Marc:Would he probably rather not play it?
Marc:I don't know.
Guest:But he's too busy thinking about his new song he wrote today.
Guest:And that's where I'm at.
Guest:I'm writing screenplays and often I'm even writing a new one while I'm starting another one.
Guest:So what's the one you're beginning work on?
Guest:Can you give us a taste?
Guest:Yeah, I mean...
Guest:I feel pretty safe with most of the ideas I come up with to talk about them occasionally.
Guest:I did have one taken recently, and even that didn't get me too angry.
Guest:That's pretty funny.
Guest:There's a guy whose life is horrible, and he's like a middle-aged dude, and he's sitting at home, and he's got a kid that's young, and she is divorced, and the kid doesn't want anything to do with the dad, and the dad's life is shit.
Guest:He gets fired because...
Guest:he gives flowers to this woman at work and she doesn't feel safe in the workplace anymore.
Guest:And he may or may not have a brain tumor and his life is fucking horrible.
Guest:And he's sitting at home and he's watching a show like My Super Sweet Sixteen.
Guest:I don't know if you've ever seen that, but it's like 16-year-old horrible rich cunts and they get a car and they go, you gave me the wrong car.
Guest:So I'm sure some of it's cooked, but it's still a horrible, horrible thing to put out in the world.
Guest:And so this guy's sitting there and he's watching that show and he drives from Syracuse to Virginia and he kills that girl.
Guest:And then one of the girl's classmates is like, did you kill Chloe?
Guest:And he doesn't say anything.
Guest:She goes, awesome.
Guest:They just take off and they start killing people.
Guest:So like people say that my last two movies were dark and I always say that they weren't.
Guest:And I really don't think they were dark, but this one is dark.
Guest:I feel it's dark.
Guest:But do you see it as a comedy?
Guest:I'm assuming folks will laugh, but I don't really concern myself, and this sounds pretentious, but I don't really concern myself with that when I'm making them, when I'm writing them.
Guest:It's more like, I know if we're really sincere and playing this stuff to the bone, it'll get a laugh.
Guest:Like the movie with Robin, I didn't know what would get laughs, and all of a sudden these scenes that I thought were...
Guest:on the bubble or I wasn't going to put in or, and they've got huge laughs and things like that.
Guest:So I just kind of just try to tell these stories.
Guest:I look at all these stories as like fables.
Guest:I don't ever think of the movies that I make as like accurate slice of life.
Guest:So I think of them as I have, I have a, a, a very simple thing I want to say at the end.
Guest:And, and, and, you know, maybe someday I'll do a biopic and things like that.
Guest:And then I'll be a little more true, truthful.
Marc:Oh, that's interesting.
Marc:So it's not really about capturing a reality.
Marc:It's about telling a story with a sort of morally challenging idea.
Guest:And I use the main characters.
Guest:I usually play them as very real people.
Guest:And then the lesser characters get a little goofier.
Guest:And I think of movies like, you know, I mean, whatever, like Billy Wilder movies and those kind of movies.
Guest:I use that kind of, I think, in the back of my head a little bit, maybe.
Marc:well I'm glad you're doing well man it was great talking to you awesome your show's amazing well thank you thank you for coming Bobby
Marc:That's it.
Marc:That's our show.
Marc:I hope you enjoyed that conversation with Bobcat.
Marc:I am in the future in Melbourne, Australia.
Marc:I am taping a live WTF here in Melbourne and I am going to interview, I believe, a couple of Australian comics.
Marc:So you'll get that coming.
Marc:Just know that I'm doing okay and that I am in the future and the future is fine.
Marc:Also remember just coffee.coop because we love them.
Marc:Pow.
Marc:Can't do it.
Marc:Not drinking coffee.
Marc:The coffee here is fucking amazing.
Marc:I'm drinking a Diet Coke and eating Vegemite on a rice cake.
Marc:That's what I'm doing.
Marc:Go to the WTF pod shop and pick up some of those episodes if you don't have them and you want to download them and own them.
Marc:Louis C.K.
Marc:Parts 1 and 2, Judd Apatow Parts 1 and 2, Ben Stiller, Attell, Dane Cook, Andy Richter.
Marc:Carlos Mencia, Robin Williams, and all those live at comic specials are available at WTFPodShop.com.
Marc:Go to WTFPod.com.
Marc:Get on the mailing list.
Marc:I'm very diligent about that.
Marc:Buy some shirts if you'd like.
Marc:Get a WTF mug.
Marc:Some special edition posters.
Marc:We're running a full WTF empire right here.
Marc:Pick up that app.
Marc:Did you get the app for the iPad, iPod Touch, iPhone, Droid?
Marc:Or you can go to the site itself.
Marc:Go to WTF Pod, choose the no iTunes option, and you can sign up for the premium at the site and stream all of the original WTF episodes.
Marc:Enough plugging.
Marc:I'm going to go out into the Melbourne day, Melbourne day, and perhaps go to St.
Marc:Kilda and walk along the water and take things in.
Marc:That's what I'm going to do.
Marc:It's so great to be away.
Marc:I've been writing a lot.
Marc:All right, I'm rambling.
Marc:Are we done here?
Marc:Are we done here?
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