Episode 14 - Steve Agee / Troy Conrad
Guest 2:Lock the gates!
Guest 4:Are we doing this?
Guest 4:Really?
Guest 4:Wait for it.
Guest 4:Are we doing this?
Guest 4:Wait for it.
Guest 4:Pow!
Guest 4:What the fuck?
Guest 4:And it's also, eh, what the fuck?
Guest 4:What's wrong with me?
Guest 4:It's time for WTF!
Guest 4:What the fuck?
Guest 4:With Mark Maron.
Marc:All right, let's do this.
Marc:Welcome, what the fuckers.
Marc:Nice to have you here.
Marc:This is What the Fuck with Marc Maron.
Marc:Thanks for tuning in.
Marc:Thanks for downloading it.
Marc:Thanks for enjoying me in your head while you are on the treadmill or driving in your car or sitting on a bus or a subway chuckling to yourselves or perhaps just thinking.
Marc:Whatever it is you do while you're listening to me, I encourage it.
Marc:I encourage it 100%, even if it's seething.
Marc:Go ahead.
Marc:Do what you got to do.
Marc:I want to thank, first of all, I'd like to thank everybody that came out to the UCB, the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater here in Los Angeles for our first live taping of the podcast.
Marc:We had a great show.
Marc:We had Greg Barron, Craig Anton, Dave Anthony, Jesse Thorne from the Sound of Young America.
Marc:We had a great time.
Marc:Great conversation.
Marc:Good laughs.
Marc:We had Jim Earl, who did something inspired and genius as usual.
Marc:And Eddie Pepitone lost his shit in a good way.
Marc:Always good to have Eddie on.
Marc:We had a great time.
Marc:We're going to be doing more of those in the future.
Marc:You'll be hearing that on Thursday, this coming Thursday.
Marc:So look forward to that because it was definitely an experience.
Marc:On the show today, very excited to talk to someone I don't know that well, but we've sort of run into each other here and there in the comedy world.
Marc:Steve Agee, who plays one of the burly gay men on the Sarah Silverman program.
Marc:Looking forward to having him in the garage.
Marc:Also, I just spent about 15 minutes dancing in my living room alone.
Marc:What a great thing that is.
Marc:And you know what the sad thing about it was?
Marc:I was a little self-conscious.
Marc:I was a little self-conscious dancing alone in my living room.
Marc:What could be so horrible to be caught dancing?
Marc:It's not like you've been caught masturbating or you've been caught strangling a cat.
Marc:I mean, dancing is dancing.
Marc:And when I do it, which isn't very often, it feels good.
Marc:It feels like I should be dancing all the time.
Marc:I'm dating a woman that dances constantly.
Marc:And there's part of me that's like, why are you dancing all the time?
Marc:But there's another part of me that's like, God, why can't we all be dancing?
Marc:Why am I not dancing right now?
Marc:Usually it takes something to provoke me.
Marc:And I locked into a song last night.
Marc:I don't know if you've had that experience where you hear a song and
Marc:You're out at a restaurant.
Marc:I was at UCB and they were playing something on the stereo before the show.
Marc:And I was like, what is that?
Marc:What is that?
Marc:It was just one of those hooks that just locked in my head.
Marc:And I'm like, I got to have that.
Marc:I got to have that.
Marc:And I got to listen to it over and over again.
Marc:The last time I had that experience was with Kings of Leon for Happy Alone off of the Youth and Young Manhood album.
Marc:I heard it.
Marc:I was at the punchline.
Marc:It was playing on a compilation.
Marc:I'm like, I got to have that record and I got to listen to the fuck out of it.
Marc:I got to listen to the fuck out of that song until I'm just high.
Marc:There are certain songs that just make you high and they deliver every goddamn time until you burn out on it.
Marc:Then you got to put it on the shelf for a while and hope it gets you high later.
Marc:But what I was listening to today, I actually went out before the show at UCB last night and I was like, does anyone know what the fuck this song is?
Marc:Siri, what the fuck is this song?
Marc:Because the guy who was playing in the sound booth, it was just a compilation.
Marc:It wasn't labeled.
Marc:No one in the audience knew.
Marc:I think somebody, thank God, had that thing on their iPod or their iPhone, I mean, and tracked it down.
Marc:It was Delta Spirit.
Marc:The song is Trash Can.
Marc:And I'm so excited to have it because I got to drive to Long Beach tonight to do a show with Greg Fitzsimmons.
Marc:And I'm just going to listen to the fuck out of that song over and over again until I don't get high anymore.
Marc:That is the amazing thing about music as compared to, you know, like I've always said that comedy is a trick.
Marc:Music is magic.
Marc:Who knows?
Marc:I mean, sometimes...
Marc:like you look at the blues you look at most popular music it's three fucking chords and it's what you bring to it that makes it magic here's here's your magical equipment you don't have to be able to use it well you just have to somehow make it your own and make some magic and there are certain songs man that just like send me over the fucking top over and over again heroes with david bowie that gets me you know when he starts singing really loud i love that
Marc:A couple of psychedelic numbers, a few Hendrix.
Marc:There's a lot of songs that do it.
Marc:But I'm very excited to have a new one in the mix.
Marc:Now, this obviously isn't what I want to spend the show talking about.
Marc:And I've decided that WTF can be a broad-based idea.
Marc:You know, obviously the show is not all about what the fuck.
Marc:But sometimes it can be what the fuck, where the fuck, who the fuck, when the fuck.
Marc:It doesn't matter.
Marc:WTF, it's the question.
Marc:When the fuck is that going to happen?
Marc:Who the fuck is that?
Marc:What the fuck is this?
Marc:Where the fuck are we?
Marc:All those questions are happening on a daily basis with me.
Marc:And I'm going to get into this health care thing a little bit because, you know, honestly, I want a public option.
Marc:Could somebody please give me a public option?
Marc:I just I need I need to know that I'm going to have insurance.
Marc:I want to know it.
Marc:But the one thing that I don't understand about the public health care issue is essentially I don't understand what people are fighting against.
Marc:I don't understand what this America is that they want back.
Marc:I think they're confused.
Marc:I don't understand what kind of American stands up at a town hall meeting and
Marc:Angry after a woman has just said publicly to her congressman or representative That I would like a public health care option.
Marc:I have cancer.
Marc:I have been fired from my job.
Marc:I have two kids I'm having a hard time getting work and a public health care option would really help me get through this and an Angry person stands up and says I'm not gonna pay for her health insurance.
Marc:I don't have to pay for her health insurance.
Marc:Why doesn't he just say?
Marc:kill her
Marc:Let's kill her.
Marc:Let's kill the poor, kill the uninsured.
Marc:Is that the America they're fighting for?
Marc:I don't really understand.
Marc:I just don't understand on a gut level.
Marc:Would I be willing to pay a little more to make everybody feel better, to make everybody feel covered?
Marc:Absolutely, because I think it would change the cultural psyche immensely, immensely.
Marc:But then I started to realize that what they're really defending is capitalism, which is clearly failing.
Marc:It is not democracy that they're defending.
Marc:And I'll be honest with you.
Marc:I don't know that we'll ever have healthcare publicly in a broad way because of capitalism.
Marc:Capitalism as a system functions in a very specific way.
Marc:And we have a 10% unemployment rate.
Marc:And we're never going to have national healthcare because the system needs the turnover.
Marc:This is capitalism's idea of what evolution means.
Marc:If you can't make a buck, you don't deserve to live.
Marc:You're draining the system.
Marc:And capitalism is failing.
Marc:I've not seen Michael Moore's new movie.
Marc:I don't know what his angle is.
Marc:And then I started to realize the other reason that national health care is such an issue in a failing capitalistic society.
Marc:state or country.
Marc:We have a consumer-based economy.
Marc:Consumerism is driven by exploiting people's needs.
Marc:They think they need things.
Marc:They need things to make them feel better.
Marc:They need things to make them feel validated.
Marc:They need things to make them feel like they have a certain status in the world.
Marc:And whether they do or not is not the issue.
Marc:The issue is if everybody had...
Marc:Healthcare, a lot of those needs would be tempered by the fact that people would not be afraid that they were going to get sick, would not be afraid that if they do, they will go bankrupt, would be less afraid of dying of something stupid, would have a certain amount of peace of mind.
Marc:And you know what the biggest enemy of consumer-based capitalism is?
Marc:Peace of mind.
Marc:If you have peace of mind, why do you need to buy shit that you don't need?
Marc:You don't.
Marc:So that is the system they're defending.
Marc:To be honest with you, we could use a little socialism.
Marc:I don't want to scare anybody away, but I think America really in the best of all worlds,
Marc:We need to figure out who the hell we are as people.
Marc:We need to understand what our limitations are and what we can and can't do.
Marc:And maybe only having a choice of three kinds of government made shoes and four kinds of government made pants and three kinds of government made glasses frames and one or two government made hats for a couple of years wouldn't be such a horrible thing.
Marc:Maybe we'd actually get to know each other and know ourselves a little better.
Marc:I mean, if you really think about it, if anything becomes a fashion trend, they're all wearing that anyways, eventually.
Marc:Eventually, everyone's wearing a pork by hat.
Marc:Eventually, everyone's wearing some horn rim glasses.
Marc:Eventually, everyone's wearing that short sleeve shirt of those little windbreakers and the same pants.
Marc:So maybe if we just make it fashionable.
Marc:It'll work out for a couple of years.
Marc:But I just feel that we could all use the coverage.
Marc:It would make us feel better about ourselves as a country.
Guest 3:Are you comfortable?
Guest 3:Yes.
Guest 3:You've been sitting for 72 hours?
Guest 3:Well, probably a lot longer than that.
Guest 3:I've had vertigo for three weeks now, which makes it so you don't want to do anything except sit.
Guest 3:You know what I mean?
Guest 3:But it's just a free-floating vertigo for no reason, or...?
Guest 3:I don't know.
Guest 3:My doctor thinks it's an inner ear thing.
Guest 3:I was diagnosed with some form of vertigo, but stress-related when I was in college.
Guest 3:My freshman year, as soon as my first bit of finals were over, the very next day, the room started spinning.
Guest 3:All I could do was lay down and close my eyes.
Guest 3:After a long nap, it went away.
Guest 3:That would generally happen after finals until I finally went to an ENT.
Guest 3:And they're like, it's probably stress-related.
Guest 3:My guest in Garage is Steve Agee.
Marc:That's me.
Marc:Who is a regular cast member on the Sarah Silverman program.
Guest 3:Wow, you got it right.
Guest 3:Most people say Sarah Silverman show.
Guest 3:Do they really?
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:I'm glad I got it right.
Guest 3:99% of the time.
Marc:He's also a vertigo sufferer.
Marc:And seeing as this is a vertigo sufferer-specific webcast, we're reaching out to people who suffer from free-floating vertigo as a way to bring the community together and make people feel like they're not alone.
Marc:Do you have other psychosomatic things?
Marc:Because I have had a history of psychosomatic.
Guest 3:I am the biggest hypochondriac.
Marc:Oh, do I have a story for you then?
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:My whole...
Guest 3:Especially last Thursday, but the whole three weeks where I've been having this mild case of vertigo, I've been a wreck.
Guest 3:I've been a nervous wreck.
Guest 3:Where does your brain go?
Guest 3:Cancer?
Guest 3:It depends on who I talk to.
Guest 3:I talked to Andy Richter the first week it happened.
Guest 3:I was doing a show at UCB, and I was explaining to him about the dizzy feeling I had, and I asked him if he'd ever had that.
Guest 3:And we're about the same age.
Guest 3:And he said, well, the only time I've ever...
Guest 3:felt dizzy was last year when I had a stroke.
Guest 3:And so not helpful.
Guest 3:No.
Guest 3:So all night I was, you know, on the computer, WebMD, all the websites checking stroke symptoms.
Marc:There's no way it's going to do anything but reaffirm that something you have no control over is destroying you.
Guest 3:And any symptom you think you're feeling, if you look it up on the Internet,
Guest 3:Those symptoms go with most major diseases.
Marc:Yeah, we're a closed system.
Marc:They're not going to be like, yeah, if you find yourself flying, if you lift off the ground and you're actually off and flying, that's a symptom of a horrible disease.
Guest 3:It's always...
Guest 3:Chest pains or dizziness.
Guest 3:Yeah, nauseousness.
Guest 3:Or nausea, which is with every major heart attack, stroke, everything has those symptoms.
Marc:Well, let me tell you a story to make you feel not alone because I was paralyzed with hypochondria for most of my childhood.
Marc:And I think that the reason I had it was my father was a doctor.
Marc:Mine too.
Guest 3:No.
Guest 3:Oh, yeah.
Marc:So that's the only way we could connect with that.
Marc:It's very common.
Guest 3:Doctors, children.
Marc:Right, because if you say, like, I think I got something, then all of a sudden they're paying attention.
Guest 3:They're locked in.
Guest 3:They're feeling your glands.
Marc:Yes.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And you're like, Daddy likes me.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:Oh, that's so wild.
Guest 3:That's all it takes.
Guest 3:What kind of doctor was your dad?
Guest 3:Anesthesiologist.
Guest 3:Oh.
Guest 3:He's retired now.
Guest 3:My dad was a surgeon.
Marc:Oh, wow.
Marc:What kind?
Marc:Orthopedic.
Marc:I remember one time he was going to do some bonding with me, so he takes me to watch a film about a procedure he didn't know how to do.
Marc:Oh, what?
Marc:He took me to see this film, and they were using saws and hammers, and I was traumatized.
Marc:Oh, it's horrible.
Marc:Even more than having all those medical journals around the house.
Marc:Did your dad have those?
Guest 3:Always.
Guest 3:PDR, Physician's Desk Reference.
Marc:Well, there's that, but he also got like Chama Magazine, and they have all these horrible pictures.
Guest 3:Chama?
Guest 3:That sounds like a Jewish publication.
Marc:No, it was J-A-M-A, I think.
Guest 3:I thought it was C-H-A-M-A.
Marc:Journal of the American Medical Association.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:And they'd always have these graphic pictures of things removed from things.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:You know, there were Siamese twins in there.
Marc:There was, you know, every horrendous disease you could think of.
Marc:And this, like, most kids are reading Dr. Seuss.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And I'm like, you know, like, he had an illustrated textbook from medical school of just diseases of the penis.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Marc:Of the genitals.
Guest 3:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:In full color.
Marc:Yep.
Marc:You know, no Sam I am for me.
Marc:No, it's drama.
Marc:Okay, so let me tell you this story.
Marc:It's not, I guess, that common for an interviewer to share, but I think I can help you.
Guest 3:Yeah, I love these stories.
Marc:And I don't know that, I don't think I've discussed this on the podcast.
Marc:So I was a horrendous hypochondriac, and I was away at college.
Marc:It was my second year of college.
Marc:And I kept, you know, my hands and my feet kept getting numb.
Marc:And I couldn't sleep.
Marc:And literally I felt my hands and my feet were numb all the time.
Marc:And I could feel it in my head.
Marc:And I was freaking out.
Marc:So I started calling my dad like about two months before Christmas vacation.
Marc:I'm like, Dad, I think I have MS.
Marc:wait how up i've thought that how old were you at this one i was probably 18 yeah okay so i'm calling my dad up dad i think i have ms i'm pretty sure he's like you don't have ms and they always do that your your dad doctor like you don't have that yeah and i'm like okay but i'm pretty sure i do he's like you don't and then i'd like i wouldn't call him for like three days and i wake up and like you know i'd feel like i had double vision i'm like dad
Marc:Dad, I have MS, right?
Marc:And he's like, you don't have MS.
Marc:And then all of a sudden, I started to get this lower back pain, and my ass cheeks hurt.
Marc:And then I started calling him saying, I think MS is better, but I think I have prostate cancer.
Ah!
Marc:Okay?
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And I keep pestering him.
Marc:And to the point where I was literally every day with the prostate cancer.
Marc:And he's like, you're too young for prostate cancer.
Marc:You don't have prostate cancer.
Marc:I'm like, I think I do.
Marc:And so either to prove a point or to put it to rest, I get off the plane in my hometown.
Marc:My dad picks me up at the airport.
Marc:It's like 7 at night.
Marc:He's like, we're going to Bob Rosen's house.
Marc:Bob Rosen's the urologist.
Marc:So we get to Bob Rosen's house.
Marc:And he comes to the door.
Marc:He's, like, wiping his face from dinner.
Marc:He's having dinner with his family.
Marc:And my father's like, sorry to bother you, Bob, but my son thinks he has prostate cancer.
Marc:I'd like you to examine it.
Marc:Oh, my God, no.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:So, Bob, God bless him.
Marc:We walk into the house, and Bob and my dad and myself are in Bob's bedroom.
Marc:And Bob says, I don't think this is appropriate.
Marc:I think maybe you should come into the office.
Marc:Oh, my God.
Marc:So, Bob decided not to finger bang me in front of my dad in his bedroom.
Marc:At his house, yeah.
Marc:And to do it at the office in private.
Marc:All right.
Marc:So I go to Rosen the next day.
Marc:I get the examination.
Marc:It's pretty nasty because they got to take a slide and whatever.
Marc:And it turns out I have prostratitis, which is some sort of stress-related infection from who knows.
Marc:Either you get it or you don't.
Marc:But it's not caused by anything.
Marc:It's just it's not that serious.
Marc:So he gives me antibiotics.
Marc:And then he says, this will knock it out.
Marc:There's no way you're going to have it.
Marc:So, you know, after two weeks of the antibiotics, I'm like, I think I still have it.
Marc:So I go into Bob Rosen again.
Marc:I said, I'm pretty sure I have it.
Marc:So he's like, he can't.
Marc:Those antibiotics are strong.
Marc:I'm pretty sure.
Marc:So he gives me the examination.
Marc:Oh, my God.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:All right.
Marc:And then like, and I'm like, thanks, Bob.
Marc:And then like three days before I go back to college, I'm like, I see something on my dick.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Marc:So I'm like, I've herpes.
Marc:and I go to Bob Rosen and I tell him I have herpes so he takes me to the hospital and what I had was I think because of the way I was masturbating at that time in my life I had a sore from jerking up he says it's not herpes and then what happens the day before I go back to college I'm like I think there's still something there and I'm poking at it and the fourth time I go in and
Marc:I'm in his office.
Marc:I pulled down my pants.
Marc:He's like in a chair, and he's got my dick in his hand.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:All right, and he's looking at my dick, and he goes, Mark, there's nothing wrong with you.
Marc:Do you like coming here?
Marc:And that was the end of it.
Marc:So you're not a hypochondriac anymore?
Marc:No, I put it out of my head.
Marc:I can't.
Marc:I don't have the energy anymore.
Guest 3:It developed.
Guest 3:I would love if someone listening to this podcast just started it like right at the point where you said, and he had my hand in his dick.
Marc:What the fuck?
Marc:What kind of podcast is this?
Marc:But how crazy do you get?
Guest 3:I write – this is my big thing.
Guest 3:I rarely get headaches.
Guest 3:So when I do, which is maybe once or twice a year, I'm convinced it's a tumor.
Guest 3:And I will – it usually happens late at night too, which is the worst time for a hypochondriac when you're alone with your fucking thoughts.
Guest 3:And I write what I call death notes.
Guest 3:Like I write letters to like my loved ones, you know, my family, my friends saying –
Guest 3:listen, this is, and it's always like, listen, this is probably nothing, but I have a really bad headache right now.
Guest 3:If I die, I want you to know, blah, bitty, blah, you know, you've been great and you mean so much to me.
Guest 3:And then I leave it on my computer on the, you know, up on the screen so that if they come in and check, they'll be like, oh my God, he had a brain tumor and he knew about it.
Guest 3:And
Guest 3:And then the next morning I eventually fall asleep and then I wake up and I go and I read these things.
Guest 3:I'm like, they scare me so much that I immediately just delete them.
Guest 3:Whereas over the past years I should have been keeping them for a book.
Marc:Like what else have you had?
Guest 3:Just like to my friends and like memories and like remember the time.
Guest 3:yeah it's really shit i i figured out to keep me busy so i'm not focused on the pain right you know what i mean but it it's fucking twisted i don't know i guess it's twisted but i mean it's kind of funny i've done that kind of stuff when i felt like my life was in danger yeah i'll text myself if anyone finds this i'm gonna start doing that texting myself like i knew that this was happening fucking no one would believe me
Marc:So you just got done with which season of Sarah's show?
Guest 3:We just finished last week.
Guest 3:And that was the second season now?
Guest 3:Season three we finished.
Marc:And it's going pretty well?
Guest 3:I think it's the best season yet.
Guest 3:Now we just have to wait until February when it starts airing.
Marc:For people to come up to you and go, you're the gay guy from Sarah's show.
Guest 3:Yeah, right now and for the past few months, it's been people going up going, I loved that show that you were on.
Marc:And you're like, it's coming back.
Guest 3:It's coming back.
Marc:So now when you guys do that, it's all scripted, right?
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:A lot of people ask if it's improvising.
Guest 3:It doesn't feel like an improvised show.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Usually none of it.
Marc:Like the improvised shows have a very distinct feeling now.
Marc:Like you feel like a little untethered.
Guest 3:You can tell, yeah.
Guest 3:The most that we improvise on our show is the segues.
Guest 3:Coming into a scene, you're finishing up a sentence or something.
Guest 3:Those are usually the most fun things to come up with.
Marc:Now, have you been approached by gay men or gay groups to represent somehow?
Guest 3:Well, Brian and I... Brian Poussain.
Guest 3:Poussain have been nominated for GLAAD.
Guest 3:I think it was our show, you know, like a year ago was nominated for a GLAAD award.
Guest 3:And yeah, I mean, the gay community has been really supportive.
Guest 3:No one's really come up asking us for anything.
Guest 3:But Brian and I have always been like... If anyone came up to us and asked us to...
Guest 3:say something or do something for the No on 8 campaign, we would have totally done it.
Marc:But do they generally know you're not gay?
Marc:Have people made passes at you?
Guest 3:No, I think most people can tell.
Guest 3:Just like these guys are not gay.
Guest 3:Although a lot of the gay fan mail we get is I have gay friends that are just like this or my boyfriend and I are just like this.
Guest 3:Any creepy ones like you are hot?
Guest 3:very few although my first fan mail that i ever got after the night after our first show premiered um i came home we because we had like a uh you know premiere party and i came home from the premiere party and there was like an email on this is myspace days there was an email from a guy saying as of tonight you are the cutest comedian on tv and i was like completely flattered and i was like
Guest 3:whoa man i'm gonna get laid and i was like man soon the ladies are gonna start writing this and they never did no women are ever like one girl was emailing me on on myspace like when it first started and she's like oh you're so fun i think you're so sexy and i and i at one point i was like really and she's like yeah i love fat comedians oh i was like oh fuck oh
Guest 3:Bittersweet, yeah.
Marc:How long were you doing stand-up before you got this gig?
Guest 3:I... Very rarely.
Guest 3:I mean, I did open mics and stuff in college.
Marc:Yeah, because you weren't like a... No.
Guest 3:Like a road stand-up.
Guest 3:No, never.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:And open mics during college and stuff, but I was just...
Guest 3:I wasn't in LA.
Guest 3:I was doing, you know, I'd come there.
Guest 3:I think there was like a place in Montclair or Claremont called like the Laugh Stop or something.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:That I would go there and do stuff, but I didn't know what I was doing and would always just say, fuck it.
Guest 3:I don't want to do this anyway.
Guest 3:And I was in bands mostly, which is why I came to LA.
Guest 3:What do you play?
Guest 3:Bass guitar.
Marc:Really?
Guest 3:Yeah.
Marc:Like who are your bands?
Yeah.
Guest 3:I was in a band called the Grazers and we were in Riverside, the Inland Empire.
Guest 3:And so whenever bands would come through there, we would open for a lot of them because there weren't a lot of options in Riverside.
Guest 3:We'd open for like Sublime or a lot of random ska and punk bands.
Guest 3:Who are your favorite bands?
Guest 3:Hendrix is probably my favorite.
Guest 3:I love The Who and Zeppelin.
Guest 3:I just started listening to The Who.
Marc:I was never a Who guy.
Marc:I was a Stones guy, Beatles guy, Hendrix guy, even a Grateful Dead guy, but I never locked into The Who except for a couple of songs, and I've been listening to Who's Next recently.
Marc:Oh, it's so good.
Marc:It's so good.
Marc:And the other thing that I never listened to that I just started listening to is Van Morrison's Astral Weeks.
Marc:I've never gotten into Van Morrison's.
Marc:But everyone talks about it as being this seminal record.
Marc:So I'm like, all right, maybe I'm old enough to understand.
Marc:And he's another one.
Marc:It's like listening to Who for me.
Marc:It's like he's his own fucking thing, man.
Guest 3:That's how I was with Bowie.
Guest 3:I was only really aware of his hits.
Guest 3:I was like, yeah, these are kind of poppy and good, whatever.
Guest 3:And then a few years ago, a friend of mine was playing me stuff that I'd never heard of Bowie.
Guest 3:And I was like...
Guest 3:Yeah, he's like a monster.
Guest 3:It's like, holy shit.
Guest 3:And I bought everything.
Guest 3:Everything?
Guest 3:Yeah.
Marc:Thank God you have a job.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:That must have happened.
Guest 3:Had a job.
Guest 3:Now that we're wrapped, it's kind of like.
Marc:Well, what do you do to monetize that for yourself?
Marc:Other than, you know, amass.
Guest 3:I do like web series stuff.
Guest 3:Tweeter followers.
Guest 3:Web series stuff.
Marc:Oh, yeah, you do that interview show in your house.
Guest 3:yeah but that's just for the shit you know just for the hell of it how many how do you amass a million twit tweeter people you know it was all timing like sarah joined after i'd been on for months and months and months and only had like barely 2 000 followers and sarah joined twitter and within like two days had like 5 000 and so the week that happened i was like kind of like
Guest 3:Fuck, I've been on here for forever, and we're on the same TV show.
Guest 3:Yeah, bring it.
Guest 3:I should have more.
Guest 3:And so I sent out a challenge on Twitter saying, if I get 5,000 by the end of the week, I will read every follower up to 5,000 or more that I get by Friday.
Guest 3:I'll read all their names in a video blog.
Guest 3:And so it slowly started going up.
Guest 3:And then a friend of mine emailed me saying, I did some calculating and that's going to take you hours.
Guest 3:And so I stopped talking about it.
Guest 3:I was like, I don't want to spend hours reading names.
Marc:It's funny that you had a friend that did that work for you.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:And then on a Wednesday, I think James Gunn, the director, sent out a Twitter saying the same thing.
Guest 3:He's like...
Guest 3:follow steve ag and then it started going up and i was like oh shit this is gonna happen and then the next day somehow rain wilson oh he's huge he tweeted it within 20 minutes i had over 5 000 followers and uh this was on a thursday and it was it just started going up and then friday afternoon something happened to where
Guest 3:All of a sudden, it literally just started just multiplying by hundreds and hundreds every minute.
Guest 3:And I was like, what the fuck is going on?
Guest 3:No one has Twittered about me.
Guest 3:And it turns out that that day or somewhere around that week, I had been put on a list on Twitter of recommended followers.
Guest 3:Like when people sign up, there's a list saying, oh, you should look at these people.
Guest 3:And so when people sign up now, if they don't uncheck it, I think they automatically follow me.
Guest 3:But this was also the same week that Oprah did a show.
Guest 3:About Twitter.
Guest 3:Oprah fucking Winfrey did a show about Twitter and how I just signed up for my Twitter.
Guest 3:And so that's when my spike happened was like that day, like just for some fucking random reason.
Marc:So that's so wild.
Marc:Like it doesn't, it's not based on people going, I like Steve.
Marc:not in my case you find you're addicted to this shit cuz I got problems with it yeah like that like pathologically like you know yeah check on like right now I'm downloaded it for my phone you did I didn't do that yet I can tweet from my phone but I can't read my tweets on my phone we are so shallow it's fucking horrible oh my god and and I literally I wonder what's next because I
Marc:I think what's next is that we just volunteer to have ourself tagged like you do your pets.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Marc:And that everything is just connected.
Guest 3:People can literally follow you with like a homing beacon.
Guest 3:Yeah, with a mic built into your mouth.
Guest 3:Or like a loudspeaker on your head.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:Whatever you think is projected.
Marc:It just goes out of the world.
Marc:So what, uh, has anything happened on the set?
Marc:Like, why don't you share some, uh, some stories about, uh, working on Sarah's show.
Marc:Cause I know a lot of people were fans and I've known her since she was 16.
Marc:That's the weirdest thing.
Marc:Like, I think I've known her since she, well, certainly since she was in college.
Marc:I remember when she started, I knew her and I knew her boyfriends then I knew, uh, her roommate in college.
Marc:I've been to her college dorm room.
Marc:I, I actually slept at her mother's house.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Marc:I think in New Hampshire.
Marc:Yeah, yeah.
Marc:Because we did a couple of gigs together where she opened for me in these little horrible gigs and we ended up staying at her parents' house.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:And I've met her father.
Marc:We stopped at her father's house.
Guest 3:He's very funny.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:He's been on our show a couple of times this season.
Guest 3:Oh, really?
Guest 3:Like real cameos.
Marc:Doing what?
Marc:Being Sarah's dad?
Marc:Just like the...
Guest 3:A cutaway to a guy saying something really random, and it's her dad.
Marc:And you have the sister, Laura, still on?
Guest 3:Laura's still on.
Guest 3:We're all, everyone.
Guest 3:Tig?
Guest 3:Yeah, Tig's been on a lot this season, actually.
Marc:And Brian?
Marc:And who plays the cop again?
Guest 3:Jay Johnston.
Guest 3:How's he doing?
Guest 3:Great.
Guest 3:One of the funniest people ever.
Guest 3:Has anything weird happened?
Marc:Or is it just like business?
Guest 3:Well, this season is really weird.
Guest 3:They gave one of the episodes they gave me and Brian an A story like where it's our episode.
Guest 3:And it was an episode where our director and co-creator Rob Schraub was like, I'm only going to come back this season if you give me my own episode that I can write and direct no notes.
Guest 3:And so this was the episode he chose, you know, us to have the A story.
Guest 3:And it's I can't give anything away because it's an epic episode.
Guest 3:But like,
Guest 3:it was so grueling that as we were doing it like brian and i are usually the b story and it which entitles coming in three days a week to work instead of all five days of the week and it's like it's a pretty easy gig and when we got the a story it was like every fucking day and i'm not complaining by the way it was just exhausting and
Guest 3:And I was like, man, I kind of I think I was talking to Jeff Garland like about playing like the second banana on a show or something and how much easier it is and how, you know, I could totally do that for the rest of my life and not have a problem with.
Guest 3:I want my own show.
Guest 3:It's pretty awesome.
Guest 3:Just coming in three days a week and not having to worry about notes and not having it all hanging on you.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Marc:And you guys had to do a whole show.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:And it was kind of dramatic.
Guest 3:There were dramatic parts in the episode where and not like funny dramatic.
Guest 3:We're like Rob, you know, paid for me to go to an acting coach because he's like, you're going to have to be really emotional.
Guest 3:And there's a couple of scenes where you're going to have to cry.
Marc:So wait, so you went to an acting coach to learn how to cry.
Marc:How does that work?
Marc:It wasn't.
Marc:Did the person sit there and go, you're terrible?
Guest 3:No, he's this awesome guy, Sam Christensen, who he was the casting director for MASH, you know, the series.
Guest 3:And he's got this really great thing he does where you work with your essences.
Guest 3:Like, you know what I mean?
Guest 3:You don't like, it's not a technique thing.
Guest 3:It's working with what you have and how people perceive you.
Guest 3:What's an example of that?
Marc:Like if I needed to do something right now?
Guest 3:Well, it's just basically doing it as yourself, which is the reason why people hire you to begin with.
Guest 3:Right.
Guest 3:You know what I mean?
Guest 3:Mark would be perfect for this because he's Mark.
Marc:But if I had to cry right now?
Guest 3:Well, that was the thing he was saying.
Guest 3:You have to relate it to something real.
Guest 3:And I wish I could say what it was about, but we can't.
Guest 3:But it was still – and I went and saw this guy a few times.
Guest 3:It wasn't like I went a lot –
Guest 3:But it was still like the day before the first scene.
Guest 3:There were actually three scenes.
Guest 3:One which wasn't crying but was pretty emotional.
Guest 3:And that was the first one we did.
Guest 3:And Brian just got there right away.
Guest 3:And I like could not... Like there's a hundred people standing around.
Guest 3:And I'm so in my own head.
Guest 3:And Brian's like getting choked up.
Guest 3:And in my head it's becoming a competition.
Guest 3:I'm like...
Guest 3:how can this motherfucker cry?
Guest 3:And I can't fucking cry, you know?
Guest 3:And, uh, and so we did the scene and I just couldn't cry.
Guest 3:I could get sad, but I couldn't cry.
Guest 3:And then the director was like, he's like, we, he's like, that scene works.
Guest 3:Don't worry about it, but you're going to have to cry in two days.
Guest 3:And I was like, Oh fuck.
Um,
Guest 3:And so for two days, I was just, like, doing nothing but watching, you know, sad shit on TV and, like, the news and, like, the horrible stories and listening to nothing but sad music.
Guest 3:And I'm like, I can't fucking cry.
Guest 3:And, like, the night before, you know, the big scene where we're crying, Rob, the director, sends me a fucking clip from –
Guest 3:Jim Henson's funeral he's like hey watch this and it's Frank Oz eulogizing Jim Henson and I couldn't do anything except laugh the whole time because I pictured him like going you know this is sad this will get him there like he you know
Guest 3:And I was like, this is the fucking Muppets.
Guest 3:Why?
Guest 3:I'm laughing at this really sad thing.
Guest 3:And then so the next morning I go in there and like he had talked to everyone in the crew.
Guest 3:He's like, don't talk to Steve or Brian, because that was my complaint.
Guest 3:The first night was like.
Guest 3:People are coming up to me and joking around and shit, and I can't.
Guest 3:Gonna cry, big guy?
Guest 3:That kind of stuff?
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:And so he's like, nobody talked to them.
Guest 3:And so we walk in.
Guest 3:It was the first scene of the morning, and it was just dark in the stage.
Guest 3:And you could have just heard a pin drop, which just was more pressure for me.
Guest 3:I was like, fuck.
Guest 3:fuck, I'm not going to be able to do this.
Guest 3:And so he's like, okay, we're going to have cameras ready.
Guest 3:When you guys walk into the scene, we'll start it.
Guest 3:It's just up to you.
Guest 3:And so then I'm just sitting there, and Brian's already there, and I'm just like, and I go over to the makeup girl, and I'm like, can I have some of that menthol that you put under your eyes to make your eyes water?
Guest 3:Because I don't think I'm going to be able to cry.
Guest 3:And she's like, okay.
Guest 3:So I put some, I'd never used any before, and it's like putting a Hall's cough drop in your eyeball.
Guest 3:and so i i could feel the waters and it burned like you can barely open your eyes it burns so bad and so i'm like okay let's do this i'm i'm like i'll just act really sad my eyes will be watering it'll be fine and so we get in there we start to do the scene and the second water breaches my eyelid it was like this sense memory where like my body's like oh this is supposed to happen and
Guest 3:And I fucking let loose with a fucking... It was like going to therapy for the first time.
Guest 3:And I was just like sobbing.
Guest 3:I could barely say the words.
Guest 3:It wasn't even the menthol anymore.
Guest 3:It was like real tears from like 20 years of bullshit.
Guest 3:And like...
Guest 3:Like everyone on the set was just like mouths on the floor.
Guest 3:And then he would say, okay, cut.
Guest 3:He's like, we got this.
Guest 3:This is great.
Guest 3:We're going to move the cameras around to the other side now.
Guest 3:And like they're moving the cameras and I can't stop crying.
Guest 3:I'm sitting there like rocking and like, you know, where you're, you're like, yeah, you're breathing is stuttering.
Guest 3:You're like, I was like,
Guest 3:weeping like and it was it wouldn't stop and like they had time to move the cameras and then start again and I was still fucking crying and then they're like they finish the scene they're like okay cool and we immediately had to go on to shooting the next scene in the day which was the polar opposite like something really stupid where it's you know farting and everything and we had to go block it like immediately and like I'm still like laughing
Guest 3:and it was it was so fucking scary that that happened to me but it also felt really good like i'd been in therapy for years and the only time i cried was the very first time i went to therapy and it was nothing like that it was like oh that felt kind of good but this was like almost like a drug i was like wow that felt so fucking good i can't wait to do this again tomorrow and you did it again did it again the next day and it was fine and um
Marc:Wouldn't it be hilarious if you did that?
Marc:That's an amazing story.
Marc:I'm glad you managed it.
Marc:But I think it would be hilarious if you had this cathartic cry that you realized had been stifled from wherever you started to stifle your crying.
Marc:And then after three days on set, you realize, I don't want to do comedy at all.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Marc:I want to leave the business.
Marc:I feel better.
Guest 3:Yeah, it was weird.
Guest 3:Because I...
Guest 3:Honestly, I tried to remember a time that I've cried that hard, and I really don't.
Guest 3:It sounds like a childhood cry when you're five or four.
Guest 3:Like losing a dog or something when you're a little kid.
Marc:When you cry when you're a kid, once it gets going, you don't really have the regulator to stop it.
Guest 3:That's what it was like.
Guest 3:God, it must have been so refreshing.
Guest 3:It felt so good afterwards.
Guest 3:I felt relaxed.
Guest 3:But I honestly don't think I want to watch it.
Guest 3:Yeah, I know.
Marc:That's what I'm wondering.
Marc:I wonder how you're going to feel.
Guest 3:I think it would be embarrassing to watch.
Marc:Well, I don't think anyone would know necessarily that that's what you went for.
Guest 3:Yeah.
Guest 3:Unless they listened to this, of course.
Guest 3:I'm hoping to cut it down to a very small moment of the episode.
Guest 3:They'll probably put it on the DVD collection as B-roll.
Guest 3:Oh, my God.
Guest 3:Every, yeah, every second.
Guest 3:B-roll.
Marc:Steve Agee can't stop crying.
Marc:Of me and Brian crying, too, which was weird.
Marc:That sounds heavy because you guys are big guys.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Wow.
Marc:You can't divulge anything, but I think that I'm definitely going to tune in.
Marc:Yeah, and I think it'll be one of the episodes towards the end of the season.
Marc:So that means that we all have to wait to watch Steve Agee cry.
Marc:Until February.
Marc:Is that when it starts?
Marc:Yeah, February 4th.
Marc:Well, thanks for coming in, man.
Guest 3:Yeah, man.
Guest 3:Thanks for having me.
Marc:Thanks for sharing that.
Marc:I felt like we really shared something here.
Marc:Thanks, Mark.
Marc:Take it easy.
Marc:See ya.
Marc:I rarely do this, but I was looking around the internet and I went to the Young Turks to see what Cenk was up to and I saw a guy on the Young Turks who was Troy Conrad.
Marc:He is a spokesperson for the
Marc:for the movement that has a website, uh, angry town hall.com.
Marc:And I did a little research into him.
Marc:It turns out he lives in Los Angeles and I contacted him.
Marc:Uh, and, and he is, I don't want to be rude cause he is, uh, in the garage studio now.
Marc:Uh, welcome to the show, Troy Conrad.
Marc:Thanks.
Marc:Thanks for having me, Mark.
Marc:Uh, I'm going to try and be polite because I don't really know where you're coming from, but he, he,
Marc:You are are are basically what a libertarian.
Marc:I would classify more as libertopian.
Marc:OK, a libertopian.
Marc:So so that's like an extension of libertarian where you think that there is a libertarian utopia to be had.
Guest 1:Absolutely.
Guest 1:Yeah.
Guest 1:Once we have a tax free society, that's libertopia and we're on our way.
Marc:Okay.
Marc:Now, let's get to the brass tacks of this thing.
Marc:Now, you're not a teabagger.
Marc:Are you aligned with the teabaggers?
Guest 1:We certainly enjoy having the teabaggers on our side and doing some of the grunt work for us.
Guest 1:Absolutely.
Marc:But the teabagger seems to me to be some sort of, if I may, some sort of misguided constitutional movement.
Marc:Oh, no.
Marc:They're very, very bright people.
Marc:They're just misunderstood.
Marc:There's this idea that they're going to take the country back, that we're going to make it a
Marc:We're going to honor the Constitution.
Marc:Now, what I don't understand, they seem mostly white.
Marc:They seem mostly angry.
Marc:They seem they like to dress up in costumes and march on Washington.
Marc:But which version of the Constitution is it that they want back?
Marc:Is it the one that does not allow blacks to have jobs or women to work or vote or anything?
Marc:Or the unamended constitution?
Marc:Because I think there's a racist element to most of these movements.
Guest 1:There's not a racist element.
Guest 1:I mean, certainly we enjoy our gene pool.
Guest 1:And we think that our country was founded from a sort of, you know, a generally Caucasian gene pool.
Guest 1:But there's no racism involved in our movement.
Guest 1:Here's what it means when you say, we want to take back America.
Guest 1:We want...
Guest 1:An America where not everybody is saved all the time.
Guest 1:Like right now, for instance, our fire departments are saving 100% of the homes.
Guest 1:If you call, they're coming to your home.
Guest 1:That's a huge problem.
Guest 1:What we're doing is we're saving everybody at the expense of the taxpayer.
Guest 1:Now I'm paying for your fire.
Marc:Yeah, but sometimes fires, like let's say, for instance, you live in the hills, I'm assuming.
Marc:Do you live in the hills?
Guest 1:I have a compound in the hills, yes.
Marc:Yeah, compound, of course.
Marc:So now there were some fires up there that were not started by anybody.
Marc:They were just fires.
Marc:We have a fire season in the Los Angeles area.
Marc:So you're saying that the fire department, it's a waste of money to have them try to service everyone in the hills.
Guest 1:Yeah.
Guest 1:Absolutely, and it's a waste of taxpayers' money.
Guest 1:I happen to have a private fire company that I pay monthly for.
Guest 1:They come and spray my home when it's fire season every week with a protective foam around the perimeter, and...
Guest 1:So I'm not complaining.
Guest 1:I pay for that.
Guest 1:But I'm still paying municipal taxes, and I'm paying some federal taxes that go towards the forest fire and some of the FEMA money that goes to fire departments for equipment.
Guest 1:So this is a big problem, and that's why we want our America back.
Marc:So your movement is called the Flamer Movement?
Guest 1:Yeah, the Flamer Movement.
Marc:Do you understand the irony of that?
Guest 1:That's based on eliminating the socialist fire departments, and that's what we stand for.
Guest 1:I'm not sure of any other meanings, but we— You've never heard the term Flamer?
Guest 1:No.
Guest 1:As far as fire, I know – and I know it means we're flaming mad and I'd consider us all strong flamers and tea baggers.
Guest 1:And we want to get rid of these socialist government red trucks that are basically invading.
Guest 1:Obama fire care has taken over the country now and you can't even –
Guest 1:Fire departments can't even go out anymore and do something without direct instructions from the Obama White House.
Guest 1:Are they even going to start putting out homes that are over 65 years old?
Guest 1:We don't even know this.
Marc:Yeah.
Marc:Well, you know, I think that it seems that you're making an awfully large leap.
Marc:I mean, we have...
Marc:State governments, we have, you know, the fire department is an extension of the state government meant to protect the people.
Guest 1:Smokey the Bear didn't say only the government can take out forest fires.
Guest 1:He said only you can take out forest fires.
Guest 1:That means we don't need these fire departments.
Guest 1:So I hope everyone will go to angrytownhall.com and get rid of these government red trucks who are taking our tax money.
Marc:Troy Conrad, what are you afraid of?
Marc:I mean, it sounds to me that there is some fear.
Guest 1:I am.
Marc:Yeah, you're very afraid.
Guest 1:I am very afraid of taxes, and I think we're paying too much of them.
Guest 1:When I see a police car responding to someone, I don't care if it's a rape, I don't care if it's a murder, the first thing that goes through my mind is, great, there's another...
Guest 1:chunk of my paycheck and and that is the that is a fear i want every american to feel because the founding fathers clearly wanted us to never ever pay taxes what if someone was raping your wife i would have a private security force so that would never happen so what if you were both being held hostage okay you were tied up and there was no one in the house but you and your wife okay and
Marc:And there were some poor people that were all hopped up on crank, and they were sodomizing your wife in front of you.
Marc:And you couldn't make that call.
Guest 1:Well, first of all, I have a very nice panic room that has a...
Guest 1:140 inch high def tv so i don't know that that would ever you know happen because it's very well protected but let's just say that that happened then i would have to say uh i would be happy to have the security force that i have and if the police came in if the police came in you tell them to go away i would absolutely i would say you know what i'm not paying your taxes
Guest 1:And that goes for if I was being raped, if anyone in my family was being raped.
Guest 1:I would rather have that happen.
Guest 1:I would rather be raped every single day than have to pay taxes.
Guest 1:And I mean hardcore raped in the ass.
Guest 1:Every day, pounded by large, attractive black men, than pay taxes.
Marc:Now, what if your wife was being raped and you actually realized that she was enjoying it?
Guest 1:Are there police there?
Guest 1:No.
Guest 1:Well, I would be against that.
Marc:Thank you, Troy Conrad.
Guest 1:Thank you.
Marc:I want to thank everybody for donating and for subscribing to the show at WTFPod.com.
Marc:It is very encouraging and very exciting to me that there's a possibility, because I got to be honest with you, I have been busting my ass on this thing.
Marc:We're basically, you know, doing, it's a job and I love it.
Marc:I've never been more excited about anything than doing this podcast and having it received by the people that are enjoying it.
Marc:It's very rewarding because it's just I've never done anything that wasn't subsidized or where I didn't have to, you know, answer to an executive structure or I wasn't told that I had to say certain things or not say certain things or plug certain things and not plug certain things or not cuss or cuss.
Marc:It's just I was nervous at first because I put it up there.
Marc:I didn't know what was going to happen.
Marc:And people are digging it.
Marc:They're coming around to it.
Marc:And it's exciting because I'm like, well, this is great.
Marc:Who do I thank?
Marc:I got to thank you guys for listening.
Marc:I'm grateful that I love doing this.
Marc:And I want to thank all you people that have been supportive with your contributions and with your subscriptions.
Marc:And again, I understand that you can listen to it for nothing.
Marc:And you're certainly welcome to do that.
Marc:I just would like to, as I've said before, I want to continue it.
Marc:I want to make it bigger and better.
Marc:I'd like to make a little money so I don't have to worry about trying to go get a job where I am compromised or censored or told what to do and what not to do.
Marc:And I can be fired.
Marc:It's a spectacular feeling.
Marc:And I certainly appreciate all your support.
Marc:And if you want to contribute again, WTFPod.com.
Marc:There's a couple of options there.
Marc:And as I said, merch is in the way.
Marc:Is in the way?
Marc:No, it's not in the way.
Marc:It's on the way.
Marc:Got a bunch of designs in the works for T-shirts, stickers, mugs, and stuff.
Marc:And as soon as I get those T-shirts, I'm going to send you those T-shirts if you subscribe to the podcast.
Marc:I've already got a bunch I've got to send out when they do come.
Marc:From here on out, though, if you do go to WTFPod and you do subscribe, in the box that they offer on PayPal to...
Marc:to make a note or say something, tell me the size you want.
Marc:I've forgotten.
Marc:I've neglected to do that.
Marc:And now I'm in this position where I have to, I think, email everyone who's already subscribed and find out what size they want.
Marc:But I'll do it because I'm happy to have this job and I'm happy to be working directly for you.
Marc:Okay, people, what the fuckers, that's our show.
Marc:I'd like to thank Steve Agee for sharing.
Marc:Great story.
Marc:And I feel like I know him a lot better.
Marc:I'd like to thank Troy Conrad for coming by.
Marc:Interesting character.
Marc:I'd like to also thank you guys for listening.
Marc:And I'd like to thank Brendan McDonald for producing my show with me.
Marc:He's a genius.
you